Being Shirley (23 page)

“Er, good morning, sir, madam. I’m Annie. Are you ready to order?” She hoped her bright breeziness might be infectious. It wasn’t and neither he nor she raised a smile as they stared blankly at her before he put in a request for two full English breakfasts and a pot of Earl Grey. His British accent was clipped and his posture ramrod. Annie imagined him having either been a colonel in the Army or a headmaster at a public boy’s school in his former life. She couldn’t help but think as she jotted down their order that a full English with a pot of tea was a bit of a sad thing to breakfast on when in Greece. Assuring them they wouldn’t have to wait long, she turned her back to walk away and felt a sharp pinch on her bottom as she did so. She swung round instantly to object but found the couple both gazing woefully out to sea and wondered whether she had imagined it.
Perhaps she had just experienced some sort of weird bottom spasm in her right cheek.
She marched back into the kitchen, tore off the piece of notepaper and handed it to Mama, who launched into action with the fry pan.

Still seated at the table with a teaspoon in her hand and trying to coax Nikolos into tasting what was on it, Kassia glanced up from her task. At Annie’s disgruntled face, she burst out laughing. “Let me guess—you have had your bottom pinched, yes?”

Annie stared at her.
So she hadn’t imagined it after all
. “He’s done it to you? You could have warned me, Kas.”

“Ah, but then I wouldn’t have had the enjoyment of seeing the look on your face right now. You will learn as I did to take his order and then back away a safe distance before you turn around.”

Annie poked her tongue out at her friend. “Humph! Dirty old sod! I don’t know how he manages to stay so poker faced.”

“He is, how you say, well-practiced? His poor wife, I think she knows nothing. This is the only reason I did not slap him.”

“Yes, you’re right. She looked miserable enough without adding to her woes. He shouldn’t be allowed to get away with it, though.”

“No, I agree but what do you suggest?”

“I don’t know yet. I’ll think of something, though.”

Alexandros wandered in, freshly shaved and showered so his bleary eyes could be forgiven.

“How lovely you could join us this morning.” Kassia greeted him with more than a tinge of sarcasm before she nibbled at her toast.

He ignored her. He pulled out a chair at the table and sat down next to his oldest nephew, who after receiving a hair tousle, gazed up at his uncle with adoration. With a smile at Annie, she flushed as his eyes lingered a moment too long. Unnerved, she dropped the box of Earl Grey she’d been holding and bent down to pick it up. She felt foolish for her reaction to him. As she set about making the pot of tea, she overheard him inform his brother he was taking the Austrian couple from Room Four over to Spinalonga for the day. They were leaving in fifteen minutes.

“They haven’t requested packed lunches, have they?” Kassia’s eyes narrowed.

“Yes, yes but it is simple—just a couple of rolls and some fruit. It won’t take long to put together.”

Kassia let rip with what could only be a Greek expletive as Mama’s hand flew to her mouth in feigned shock before she told Spiros to cover the children’s ears. She pushed back her chair and got to her feet. “Why didn’t you tell me this last night?”

Alexandros shrugged, indifferent to the panic he had just caused his sister-in-law, who had left her toast half-eaten and now frantically rifled through the freezer for a packet of rolls. As his mama placed a cup of coffee down in front of him, she gave him an affectionate pat on his shoulder. “Not to worry, Alexandrosaki mou.” He smiled up at her, not worried in the slightest and said, “Thank you, Mama-mou.”

Mama beamed before she frowned at her daughter-in-law’s back, which was stiff with indignation as she slammed the microwave door shut. Annie marvelled at Alexandros’s ability to wrap his mama around his little finger and felt a frisson of sympathy for Kassia.
She was up against it with that brother-in-law of hers
, she thought as she carried the tea through to the dining room, both cheeks clenched defensively.

Thankfully, there was no more bottom pinching or further upset behind the scenes in the kitchen that morning. Although Blondie and her mousey-haired friend’s arrival in the dining room at three minutes to ten o’clock did cause some mutterings and a lot of pot banging from Mama. The two women were looking worse for wear, Annie noted as she took in Blondie’s puffy, pig-like eyes. She couldn’t see what Alexandros saw in her. Well, that was a lie; she could see exactly what Alexandros saw in her. It was impossible to miss them resting on the table top as she gazed at the menu. As she scribbled down their requests for scrambled eggs on toast and a bacon sarnie respectively, she overheard Blondie mention that they should finish their packing after breakfast before squeezing an hour in down at the beach.
So they were off, then
, she thought, not knowing why she felt so pleased.

***

Annie didn’t know how long she had been asleep on the sun lounger nor did she enjoy the bizarre dream she was in the middle of. For some reason, she was herding goats in a G-string and as she roamed the hillsides, it had become clear that things were moving that had no business doing so. Despite the hard ground, she had gotten down on her hands and knees to kick her leg back, an exercise sure to tone those stubborn glutes, when she was woken by rain. Startled, her eyes flew open and her mouth simultaneously snapped shut. She blinked and expected to find the beach deserted and herself under siege by black clouds. Instead, she saw Alexandros shaking the remnants of water from his hands.

“Did you just tip water over me?” she asked indignantly as she wiped the sticky line of drool from her mouth and tried to ignore his cheeky grin.

“I couldn’t resist it. You were so sound asleep. But if you don’t move your umbrella around, you will turn into a lobster in a short while.”

Annie could feel a telltale stinging on her shins. He was right. Groggily, she got to her feet and shifted the umbrella, which if he was so concerned about her burning, he could quite easily have moved for her. There had been no need to douse her in water. It was an excuse to check her out, she realised. She sat back down in a hurry and spread her towel out over her legs. Still, she was secretly pleased that her post-flight bruises had all cleared up and that she was no longer as lily white as she had been the first time she’d aired her togs on a Greek beach. Carl had shielded his eyes and made out he’d been blinded by the glare.

“How was Spinalonga?” She wished he would go away but saw he had no intention of doing so just yet.

He shrugged. “It was okay. Me—I don’t like the place. Too much sadness there but the guests, you know, they all want to go there to see what it’s like for themselves.”

She was surprised to hear him say this, not really having him down as the sensitive type. “I think it’s a good thing people want to go and see it for themselves. It’s like the concentration camps in Germany and Poland. They are a visual reminder that such things should never happen again. Not that the leprosy sufferers were sent to Spinalonga with any evil intent, but still—” She knew she sounded self-righteous, but then rightly so.

“Yes but these days it seems an inhumane way to treat people.”

“Yes.” Annie shaded her eyes and looked up at him.
His eyes really were the colour of maple syrup
.

“I could take you out for a ride on the boat. I have a couple of hours before I have to drive Sharon and Tracey to the airport. Maybe we could go to another bay I know around the peninsula? One where the water it is even clearer than here.”

That culled her sweet thoughts because she was not silly: oh no, she had seen
Shirley Valentine
too many times not to know that
taking her for a ride on his boat
literally meant taking her for a ride. Give the girl a few smooth, sensitive lines and she’d be putty in hands; that was his modus operandi. He was lining her up now that his little—well, not so little—blonde friend was headed back to the UK. “Um, well, I am pretty busy at the moment,” she muttered.

“Yes, it looks like it.” He smirked down at her. “We do it another time then.” This he stated with such certainty before he turned and walked up the beach that Annie was left with her mouth hanging open at his audacity.

Annie wandered across the car park, careful to look left and right then left again—or was it the other way round? She tried to remember the words her mother had drummed into her as a little girl. She was learning to mistrust the holiday-makers on the roads nearly as much as the Greeks. Something about the carefree vibe of being on holiday spilled over into the way they whizzed, helmetless, around the streets on scooters that seemed to make it okay to employ no road sense whatsoever. Over to her left was an inlet filled with boats of all shapes and sizes and monetary value. She wondered idly whether one of them might belong to Leonardo. Perhaps he was even on one of the luxury yachts moored there right now, with his latest supermodel girlfriend, sipping champers or whatever it was movie stars and their gal pals drank. To her right, she could see Elounda’s beach with its cluster of umbrellas and sun loungers filled with tourists lapping up the vitamin D.

The taverna Annie headed towards was called Georgios’s, according to the sign out on the street, and it was to be her fourth port of call in her morning’s quest to find work. She spied a group of people who lounged around one of its outside tables, sipped beers and ate pizza as she drew closer.
An early lunch
, she thought. Her stomach grumbled at the sight of all that food. Oh well, there would be plenty of time to eat when she’d found herself a job. She smiled over at the merry group and received a leer from a paunchy chap with no hair and a thick gold chain round his neck for her trouble. That would teach her to be friendly. She ducked her head under the grapevine that entwined its way over the entrance, stepped inside and was instantly grateful for the cool respite from the relentless sunshine outside.

A handful of couples sat scattered about, tucking in to their brunches. Annie paused for a moment to soak in the atmosphere afforded by the dim interior. From the low wooden beams of the ceiling, various seafaring paraphernalia dangled. There was a lifebuoy, lanterns, and thick, gnarly ropes coiled and draped. In one corner a fishing net was slung low, sagging in its middle. In the other corner by the door to the restrooms, a barnacled anchor made its presence known. Annie made her way up to the counter at the far end of the restaurant and stood in front of the till for a moment. She toyed with the idea of stealing a mint from the jar while she waited for someone to appear. Feeling a bit foolish when no one did, she called out a tentative, “Hello!”

From behind the hanging beads, a relic from the seventies, an almighty clattering sounded. Several diners glanced over at her accusingly, as though it were she who had just dropped what sounded like a dozen pots and pans. She avoided their gaze and shifted from foot to foot. Maybe she should just make a run for it because she didn’t fancy her chances of being given paid employment now. Before she could put her plan into action, a wiry little man burst through the beads and sent up a clacking symphony. He wiped his hands on a tea towel and he looked at her with the harried expression of someone who had far too much to do and not enough hands to do it with.
Right
, Annie thought as he arranged his features into one of greeting and picked up a menu from the stack by the till;
best foot forward and all that
. “Um, I’m not actually wanting to eat. What it is, you see, is—well—”
Oh, get on with it girl
, she told herself. She licked her lips. “Er, my name’s Annie, and I was wondering if you might need a waitress.”

Oh dear, she hoped that hadn’t sounded too much like the opening line to an AA meeting
. From under his impressive thatch of silver hair, the man looked at her with disbelief. The next thing she knew, he clapped his hands delightedly and then reached forward to grab her face and plant a big kiss on both cheeks.
She could take that as a yes then
, Annie thought as she took a startled step backwards.

“Paidi mou, you are an angel. An angel has been sent to me on this day.” He beamed and displayed a gleaming gold tooth. It was like Mama’s.
Gold teeth must have been all the fashion at some point, or perhaps they were a form of compulsory saving
, Annie thought. She found herself propelled through the beads into the kitchen.

“I am Georgios and this is my daughter Koula,” he announced to the flushed woman in the apron who frantically stacked dishes. She looked to be in her late thirties and her hair had escaped from her ponytail in wispy bits. It was a look Annie could relate to and she knew instantly that she would get along with this woman. “Koula, meet Annie. She has been sent from the heavens to help us.”

Koula’s pretty face lit up and she stepped forward with her hand outstretched in greeting.

***

“Yes, it was perfect timing, Kas.” Annie had found her sitting down on the grass verge by the beach as she had headed back to Eleni’s that afternoon. The sun sat a little lower in the sky and the bite had gone out of it for the day by the time she flopped wearily down next to her friend. Nikolos wore nothing but a nappy as he waved a spade around and Mateo collected pebbles and interrupted his mama every now and then to show her a treasure he had found. “Because it turned out his waitress had telephoned him last night to say her uncle had offered her work on his boat. She only wanted work while she was on her University holidays anyway and she reckoned she could earn more helping this uncle of hers. So, that was that; she didn’t give poor Georgios any warning, which given how lovely he is, seems really unfair to me.” She shrugged. “Anyway, Koula—that’s his daughter; she’s about your age and gorgeous too—said the girl was hopeless and that she wouldn’t have known what fresh squid was if it inked in her the eye so good luck to her uncle. Her surly manner didn’t do much for their trade, either, so she was no great loss.” Annie paused and drew breath. “Koula helps run the restaurant, and she and Georgios muddled through last night but they’d have been up all night if they’d sorted all the dishes out. Her husband is a fisherman, so he keeps the taverna supplied with fresh fish and they have three children who are all at school.” Annie knew she was gushing but it had been an exciting afternoon. “Honestly, I don’t think I have ever washed and dried so many dishes in my life! Talk about getting thrown in at the deep end! And I have got to be back there in a few hours.”

“You say the taverna is called Georgios’s, yes?” Kassia frowned as she tried to place it.

“Yes, that’s his name too. It’s down by the port, not far from the clock tower.” Annie paused for a moment and laughed. “Actually, that’s not very helpful, is it? Because everywhere in Elounda is near the clock tower.” Her brain was mush, she realised as she rotated her ankles, and her poor feet were killing her. How she was going to get through another shift, she did not know! “It’s got a gorgeous grapevine growing over the entrance and Georgios said his taverna is famous locally for the fresh fish dishes he cooks up.”

Kassia nodded. “Ah yes, now I know where you mean! Spiros and I went there once. The food, it was very good. Mama knows Georgios from way back but then she knows everybody in Elounda. He runs the taverna with his wife too. She was working when we were there. I remember her because she reminded me a little of my own mama.”

“His wife died a year and a half ago, which has taken its toll on him. You can tell by the way he and Koula talk about her as though she is still with them. They had four children together but only Koula still lives nearby. The others are scattered in Hania and Rethymnon for work.”

“Ah, this is sad.”

Annie wasn’t sure whether she meant that his wife had died or that his children were scattered around different parts of Crete. She decided Kas probably meant both. The need to work away in Greece was something Kristofr had touched on when she had talked to him at the Acropolis.
And look at the situation Kas and Spiros had found themselves in in Athens
, she thought with a rueful glance at her toenails peeking out of her sandals. They were in need of a lick of polish; she’d do that before she headed back to work tonight.

“So you were put to work straight away?”

“Yes.” Annie nodded and her red curls bobbed madly. “I helped clear away the dishes from the night before and took the lunch orders. It was so busy, the time just flew by but from now on, I’ll just be doing an evening shift, which will work well with helping in the morning at Eleni’s.” The fiery ringlets bouncing up and down were a sight that caused Mateo’s eyes to light up. It was a look Annie recognised and as she saw him make a beeline towards her, she hastily pulled a hair-bobble off her wrist and twisted her hair back into a ponytail. She was already bone-weary; she didn’t need a sore scalp too. Disappointed but thankfully deterred, Mateo turned his attention back to a large pebble he had been inspecting and Annie laughed. It was then that she noticed that Kas didn’t join in with her. She realised there was something about the droop in her shoulders.

“Hey, I’m sorry. I have been so busy talking about myself and my day that I haven’t asked you how yours has been. Are you okay?”

Kassia sighed and picked at the grass. “It is just the usual problem. Mama and Alexandros and the way she takes over everything and the way he does nothing.” She threw her hands up. “I know this problem of mine, it is silly and I don’t like to feel this way, but I wish she would stop interfering with the boys and that Alexandros would pull his weight. That is why the boys and I came down here for a little while.”

Annie reached over and patted her friend’s hand. “A bit of breathing space?”

She nodded. “Spiros is busy with his book, which makes him happy. He loves his life here but me—” She shrugged. “Sometimes I just don’t know.”

Poor Kas
. Annie studied her friend’s strong features for a moment. This new life they were making for themselves in Elounda hadn’t been hers by choice, but if she and Mama could find a way to make it work, to rub along together in harmony, then Annie was certain she would love it as much as Spiros did. There was nothing not to love. She glanced at the boys and saw that they were lost in their games. They had been so tiny when they had come to Elounda that they didn’t know any different now. The entire beach was their playground. At home, they were surrounded by people who loved them; a better life she couldn’t imagine. It was idyllic.

Unsure as to whether she should offer an opinion or whether Kas was just in need of a sounding board, Annie swallowed and decided to say her piece anyway. “You know, from where I sit, I think the problem is straightforward. Mama
needs
to be needed and that’s why she focuses so much of her time and energy on the boys and on Alexandros. Maybe if she had an interest or something—” She trailed off lamely then because that was as far as she had gotten with her theory.

“You think perhaps she should take up golf?”

Annie swatted at her. “You know what I mean.”

“I do and you are right but it is, how you would say? Easier said than done.”

Annie nodded and Kassia smiled at her.

“I do feel better, though, because you, my lovely friend, can always make me smile.”

Annie felt pleased and sad at the same time because she knew she hadn’t really helped at all.

“Now you have lifted my bad mood. Tell me again what you did to our friend the bottom pincher.”

Annie formed pincers with her thumb and forefinger. “I pinched his bottom when he got up to leave the dining room. Really hard.” She grinned evilly. “He yelped and jumped in the air, which made his wife turn round to see what all the fuss was about. But of course he couldn’t say anything, so he pretended he had banged his toe on the table leg. Ha! Served him right. He scuttled off with his tail between his legs or cheeks clenched or however you want to word it!”

Kassia roared with laughter. “I can’t believe you did that!”

“Carl taught me not to let anyone intimidate me and that the best way to deal with a bully is to play them at their own game.”

“A wise man, that Carl.”

“Indeed and thanks to Carl, yours, mine, and every other bottom old Silver Top has ever pinched thanks him for his advice. I have a feeling he will be keeping his hands to himself from now on.”

The sun dipped a little lower. “You had better get back to the house and get yourself ready for your next shift.”

Annie hesitated, not ready to leave her friend when she knew she was down despite her feigned joviality but Kassia gave her a gentle shove. “Go! I told you I am being silly. I will enjoy the sunset and head back with the boys shortly.”

With a glance at her watch, she saw that Kassia was right. She did need to get going if she was going to have a shower and get back to Georgios’s in time for her evening shift.

***

She spied Spiros making his way towards where she had just come from as she headed up the front path of Eleni’s. Annie waved out but he didn’t see her. She hoped that some time alone with Kas and their boys might give them the chance to talk things through properly.

Ten minutes later, she was freshly showered and felt much revived as she slipped into jeans and a white T-shirt. It was an outfit that Koula had assured her would be perfectly fine for that evening’s shift when she had inquired earlier in the day. She found Mama in the kitchen, busy as usual as she stirred something divine-smelling in the pot on the stove. To her surprise, Alexandros sat at the table with the chopping board, a knife in hand as he sliced his way through a colander of tomatoes.
Well, wonders would never cease
. She looked at him preparing the salad with approval. The thought that he really was a handsome man crossed her mind not for the first time, and she forced her attentions back to Mama. She didn’t want him to catch her gawping and so she filled the older woman in on her new job and told her regretfully as she inhaled the herbed aroma from the pot that she would not be in for dinner.