Beloved (30 page)

“Might have to give you two baths,” Ussay said as she entered the room with two buckets of steaming hot water. Three other women followed her, but continued through to the other room to fill the tub.

“Ussay!” Kira closed the distance between them in three large steps and wrapped her arms around Ussay’s shoulders. Water spilled out from the buckets and onto the floor, splashing Ussay’s dress. “I’ve missed you.”

Ussay wiggled out of Kira’s grasp and set the buckets on the floor. “I have also missed you.” She held the wet fabric away from her legs to keep from getting scalded. “I hope you are well. I felt responsible for what happened. I never should have helped you.”

Kira grasped her friend’s shoulders. “Would you rather Shandira come here and terrorize us or risk her taking Arela?”

Her eyes widened. “No, of course not.”

“Then you have nothing to worry about. I knew what could happen and chose to go regardless.” She dropped her arms and looked down at the mud puddle that had settled at her feet. Evidently the water had also hit her boots and mixed with the grime. “Maybe I should rinse off in the creek first.”

Ussay laughed. “You, My Lady, deserve as many warm baths as it takes to get you clean.” She bent to lift the buckets, motioning with her head for Kira to follow her. “Shall we?”

“Definitely.”

Ussay poured one last bucket of water over Kira’s hair before handing her a towel. “There, I think that did it.”

Kira gave her hair a brisk tussle with the towel to soak up most of the moisture, then stood and wrapped the towel around her body. “I honestly thought Octavion would send up one of his concoctions to take the black out of my hair. I know he prefers it red.”

Ussay pointed to where three bars of homemade soap and several assorted bottles sat on a small table next to the tub. “He did, but said not to use it yet. He said your red hair makes you stand out more and would make you an easy target.”

Ussay had a point. As far as she knew she was the only one in their world to have red hair. It would be like sending up a flare to the Kazedonians. “He’s right. I should probably keep it black for a while.”

Ussay left the room to summon help to empty the tub, while Kira stepped into the dressing room to choose something to wear. As usual, Ussay had already laid a nightgown out for her. Just as well. Kira was tired and couldn’t wait to lay her head on a real pillow, something she’d been fantasizing about since she arrived at the castle. No more cold nights lying in a cocoon made of sticks. She was going to sleep like a baby tonight.

When she first crawled into bed, it was like lying on a billowy white cloud. She snuggled under the warm comforter, closed her tired eyes and . . . nothing. She turned over onto her side and pulled the covers over her head to block out the sounds of Xantara. The changing of the guard in the courtyard. The waves in the lake breaking against the rocks. Horse hooves dancing near the stables. And of course, Nigel’s heavy feet pacing outside her door. He’d obviously taken Octavion’s plea to keep her safe seriously. Not that he needed the encouragement. He rarely left her side, and then only if he knew Blayde would be with her.

Kira slipped out of bed, wrapped a blanket around her shoulders and took her familiar place on the window seat. The night was especially dark with the sliver of moon and slightly overcast sky. A few minutes passed and she found herself fingering her pendant. How she wished Nigel would leave. Now more than ever she wanted to lie in the warmth of Octavion’s arms. She was sure she could find sleep there.

But then her mind wandered to what Lydia had said by the stream, that she and Octavion were bound by blood and therefore married.

Married!

Kira? Why are you not asleep?

“Crap!” She dropped the pendent, letting it land just below her collarbone. She hadn’t intended to send that thought to him. How embarrassing. Now what was she supposed to say back?

A knock came to the door and she braced herself for Octavion’s questions. “Come in.”

Another knock.

“Come in,” she said a little louder.

The door creaked open and a tiny sliver of light sliced the dark room in half. The silhouette of Nigel’s head appeared, his questioning eyes barely visible.

“I’m fine. Just . . . stubbed my toe.” She waved him away. “You don’t have to stand guard, ya know.”

He stepped into the room and straightened to his full height, slamming his fist onto his chest—a sure sign of his self-appointed guardianship. Then he turned and left the room, closing the door firmly behind him. She watched as the shadow from his boots appeared under the door and didn’t move. He wasn’t budging.
Stubborn man
.

Kira
?

“Oops.” She’d nearly forgotten to answer Octavion.
I’m fine. Just miss the sway of the trees to rock me to sleep. Might take a few nights to adjust. Sorry if I woke you
.

I was not asleep.

Oh.
Now what was she supposed to say?
Why aren’t you sleeping
?

Honestly . . . I have waited so long to hold you and now my arms ache because you are not in them
.

Kira’s heart leapt in her chest.
That sounds wonderful, but I have a problem.

What is that?

Nigel. He’s guarding my door and listening to my every breath. No way could I sneak out to see you, even if you magically appeared and whisked me away.

Kira pulled the blanket up around her shoulders to ward off the chill seeping through the window and waited for Octavion’s response. A few moments passed before she heard his voice outside her door. She listened closely, but his mumbling whisper barely reached her sensitive ears and she could not decipher the words. She watched the shadows shift under the door, then heavy footsteps clomp across the hallway and down the stairs before the heavy wooden door leading to the courtyard slammed.

Octavion didn’t bother opening the door—his spirit engulfed her senses with a soft feathery touch to every pore of her body. She closed her eyes and took it all in, letting it reach her core and turn her to mush. When his warm body sidled up next to hers, she moaned, bringing him even closer. He traced the length of her arm with the back of his fingers, making her shiver. She couldn’t help but giggle, ruining the moment.

Octavion laughed. “You can open your eyes now.”

She shook her head. “Kiss me first.”

She imagined him smiling wide, his dimples piercing the hollow of his cheeks. It made her heart flip in anticipation. When his hands softly cradled her face and his fingers threaded through her hair, she thought her heart might explode from her chest. She sucked in a breath, parting her lips just in time for his to press against them. His warm breath rushed over her face. She wanted him—wanted him now—but she couldn’t risk Arela or anyone else walking in on them.

Take me to your cottage in the forest
.

Octavion stiffened. He pulled away and withdrew his hands from her face.

She opened her eyes. “What’s wrong?”

“I am sorry, Kira. I cannot take you there.”

“Why not? I love it there and it suits you better than this place.” She pulled her legs up so he could sit next to her.

He ran his fingers through his hair, but didn’t join her on the window seat. Instead, he began pacing. “I have not been there since you left. I need to clean it.”

Kira snorted. “Seriously? I’ve been sleeping in a freakin’ tree in the middle of the B’Kari Forest for the past few months and it took three hot baths to get me clean. Do you really think a little dust is going to bother me?”

He stopped pacing and turned to face her. “I destroyed it.”

Kira threw her legs over the edge of the bench and stood, letting her blanket crumple to the floor. “What? Why would you do that? You love it there.”

“I thought . . .” He took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, his emotions showing through the moisture growing in his eyes. “We
all
thought you were dead.”

Kira felt like she’d been kicked in the gut. When she first left, thinking about the pain she’d caused everyone made her stomach wrench. It took everything she had to push it away so she could create her new life in Lairdor. She’d done a good job of forgetting until now. His words felt as though acid bore holes into her heart.

“What did you do?” She asked in a whisper. She knew she should apologize and maybe leave it at that, but opening that door would turn those emotions loose and she wasn’t ready to face them.

Octavion’s face suddenly paled and he looked a bit haggard. He motioned for her to sit back down on the window seat before joining her. He took her hand in his, caressing her knuckles with his thumb.

“King Tyrius claimed to have proof of your death, so Luka, Cade and I went to Kazedon and begged to see it. I was so afraid it was your heart or head, I could hardly breathe.” He looked into her eyes, tears welling up in them. “The thought of losing you was more than I could bear.”

The emotions she’d been holding back swelled in her throat and she nearly choked on her words. “I’m so sorry. I never meant—”

“It is not your fault. It is
his
. He never should have sent his assassins to kill you. And he should never have allowed his son to enter your world.”

“But I’m the one that—”

“No, Kira. We have gone over this. Cade is alive because of you. So is Lydia.” He brushed a tear from her face and continued with his explanation.

“The king’s proof was your blood soaked braid. Not proof of your death at all, but only that you had been severely injured. I was furious. I asked to see your body, but then his assassin . . .” His brow furrowed as if he were thinking.

“Draego.” The name felt like black sludge when it crossed her tongue.

“Yes, thank you.” He paused for a moment, as if collecting his thoughts again, then looked away. Though he tried to hide it, remembering that day caused tiny threads of gold to enter his eyes.

She took his hand and gave it a squeeze. “Go on.”

“When Draego appeared, it took all my strength not to kill him. Then he turned, said something and smiled. I cannot even remember what he said, only the taste of his blood on my lips, and Luka and Cade’s claws digging into my arms as they pulled me off of him and released me near my cottage. The only thing that kept me from going back was the sight of that cabin where we . . .”

He swallowed hard, keeping his eyes averted. “I had so many regrets.” After a moment, he faced her, the gold receding as he regained control. “I should have been more forthcoming with my feelings toward you—proved my love to you. And then you were gone, possibly dead. It was all too much and I had to release my rage. I am sorry, Kira.”

He leaned his back against the wall and smiled, the sparkle back in his eyes. “I guess I need to work on my temper, eh?”

“Ya think?” Kira scooted closer and leaned into his arms. “I don’t care what it looks like or why you did it. I still want to go there.”

He kissed the top of her head and pulled her closer. “Perhaps another time.”

She looked up at him. “No. Tonight. Right now.”