Bent not Broken (78 page)

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Authors: Lisa de Jong

BOOK: Bent not Broken
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Whoever was there impatiently knocked on the door, spiking my nerves. I tentatively crossed the floor, peeking through the small hole.

Erin.

I breathed a sigh of relief, before a whole new set of worries flooded me. Was Melanie ready for this? Today had been such an incredibly draining day, filled with so many emotions and issues, and we still had a ton to work through. Surely it was best we resolved some of those issues before we faced our families.

Not to mention that Melanie probably wouldn’t want to be discovered under these circumstances.

Resolved to tell Erin I was busy and get rid of her as quickly as possible, I swung the door open before she could use her key to unlock it. Grinning, my baby sister flung herself into my arms. “Daniel.”

“Hey.” I hugged her tight before taking two steps back and planting my feet to block her entrance. “What are you doing here? I didn’t even know you were in town.”

“I came in at the last minute. A couple of houses came on the market this week that my realtor wanted me to see. I wanted to stop by to say hi before I went to Mom and Dad’s.” She stepped forward, but I didn’t back down.

Glancing up and down at me, she frowned as if just noticing that I was standing there in nothing but my boxers. Her voice lowered as she studied me, “You’re not alone, are you?”

My lips tightened into a line, and I pushed out a sigh as I shook my head.

She scowled and narrowed her eyes, hissing under her breath, “What the hell is wrong with you, Daniel? Haven’t you learned anything? God, you’re so stupid. Look at what happened...” Erin’s face paled, and she clapped her hand over her mouth as her other reached out to push me aside.

I glanced over my shoulder. Melanie stood in the doorway to my bedroom, clad in nothing but my dark blue shirt.

Erin looked at me, her eyes wild, shocked, confused—hurt. For some reason, I felt that I had to confirm the obvious, silently nodding as I allowed a small smile to spread across my face. Erin dug her fingers into my arm. I couldn’t tell if she was angry or faint. They remained silent as they studied each other. Slowly, they advanced toward one another, cautious, each unsure of where the other stood.

All it took was Melanie reaching out a shaky hand for them to end up in an embrace.

“You two have some explaining to do.”

****

I clutched the steering wheel, willing myself to breathe as I watched her drive away.

We’d spent more than an hour with Erin. She wanted to know everything, bristling as we told her about the events that had driven us apart. It was obvious their wounds would easily heal. There would be no grudges kept, no resentment over what the other had not known.

Erin finally left, but only after receiving a promise that I would join her and Mom in the morning for breakfast. I agreed, both anxious to spend time with my family and to get her out the door. All I wanted was to continue the earlier conversation with Melanie.

As it turned out, I was weak and incapable of standing my ground when Melanie insisted she needed to see through what she’d started. I didn’t want to let her go, yet I realized that if I made her stay, it would be against her will, and I didn’t want to be anything like that asshole. I refused to be the guy who wouldn’t let her make her own decisions. It left me stuck between doing what I
knew
was right and what she
felt
was right.

In the end, I had relented with the stipulation that if he hurt her again, that would be it—and that we wouldn’t drag this shit out. She promised it was already working as proven by his sudden presence at the Preston’s this evening. She was positive she would only need to stay a few weeks.

The moment she was gone, fear saturated my every thought. Would he be waiting up for her when she got home? What if he hurt her? I mean, really hurt her. I couldn’t fathom it.

I was on the road to her house before I even realized what I was doing. I had to ensure she was safe. If she felt as if she had to stay there, fine, but she didn’t have to do it alone.

I must have driven faster than Melanie, because the garage door had just touched down behind her car when her house came into view.

Hopefully, Nicholas was already asleep. It was late—the green glow from the dash displayed “two-thirteen.”

Only the trees rustled in the wind and a dog barked in the distance. Other than that, it was complete and total silence. My mind buzzed as I listened for Melanie. I strained to feel her as she moved around the darkened house. Two dim lamps illuminated the porch, casting black shadows across the face of the white mansion.

A light flickered on in a downstairs window. I reasoned it was the same room we’d shared just two days ago. Somehow, that gave me a bit of comfort.

I reached for my phone and typed a quick message to let her know I was right outside if she needed me. She responded only seconds later that she was safe and bid me a goodnight. I wished her the same, pressed send, and sent my heart with it. I waited until darkness swallowed the house before I forced myself to drive away.

****

Erin and Mom tried to keep me sufficiently distracted after they’d coerced me into joining them in their search for a new house for Erin. I just couldn’t say no, not after how unbelievably happy Mom had been when Erin
accidentally
let it slip about what she’d walked in on last night. It was as if the worry of years had been erased from Mom’s face in one passing moment. Of course, when I had to explain our circumstances, a completely new set of concerns faced her.

I spent the morning as a backseat passenger, only offering my opinion when asked as I followed Mom and Erin house-to-house and room-to-room.

After what seemed like hours, we were finally headed to the last place on the list. We were exhausted, and Erin was no closer to a decision than when we’d first started. I blocked out the conversation happening ahead of me as we followed a path across a small grassy yard and ascended three steps. My thoughts were twenty miles away, wondering what Melanie was doing. I stared at my feet as I crossed the wooden porch, wishing she were here. I collided into Erin’s back. My mind was so far away, I didn’t even notice Erin and Mom had stopped in the doorway. Startled, I caught her, muttering an apology. I became aware they were both wide-eyed as they looked back at me, their mouths slightly agape. I frowned and glanced around the room. My heart stuttered as I processed the sight in front of me.

I braced myself against the doorframe to keep myself from falling.

It was so similar to our little house, but more than that, it
felt
the same.

Erin fidgeted beside me, and Mom stood there in silence, giving me time. Both knew what that house had meant to me. They knew I had wanted to raise a family there, had wanted to fill it with laughter and love. Instead, I had tainted it with my mistakes—left the bed defiled. I had simply walked out the front door and never returned. Mom had dealt with clearing out my things. She’d kept what she knew I would want—what I would eventually treasure—even if I couldn’t bear to look at them at that time. Then she sold the house to the first person who made an offer. I’d just wanted to be rid of it. It had held all of the hopes of a life that was shattered, and I couldn’t bear that it had become a reminder of what would never be.

Mom’s soft, warm hand slipped into mine, and I glanced down at her as she nodded her wordless encouragement.

****

The rest of the weekend proved to be tortuous, simply because of Melanie’s absence. With Nicholas home through the weekend, we were left with texts and one quick call spread out over too much time. By the time Monday morning rolled around, my spirit was rumbling, demanding hers.

I glanced at the clock. Still two hours before lunch. Plenty of time to finish what I needed to do at the office before I could take off for the rest of the afternoon.

I dialed Melanie’s number, praying she could get away. It only took one ring before my body buzzed. Even the sound of her voice had a physical effect on me.

“Hey,” she whispered in a breathy voice.

“Hey, baby. Can you get away for a couple of hours?”

“Of course.” Her answer was immediate, always as anxious as I was.

“Meet me at my office at noon?”

“Yeah...I’ll be there…love you.”

“Mmm, love you, too. See you soon.” I hung up smiling, eager to see my girl. I settled into work to square things away so I could enjoy the afternoon with her. So wrapped up in work, sorting through the seemingly endless piles of paper, I jumped when my phone buzzed in my pocket. I chuckled when I saw the name on the screen for the tenth time since Saturday.

“Hey, Mom.” She was thrilled, beside herself with anticipation, wondering if I’d talked to Melanie and when I was taking her to see the house. I laughed, saying I hoped I’d be able to take her there this afternoon, yes, I was nervous, and no, I didn’t regret it—yet.

I just hoped it wouldn’t be the wrong kind of reminder, one that would take Melanie back to the place where we had lost each other. I prayed it would be a reminder of the hope we’d had for our future, the future that we would now be able to share. I knew there would be a gaping hole where Eva should have been, but it still felt right. The energy had been there, working in full force, and I had to take the chance.

The direct line from Lisa rang, and I asked Mom to hold on a sec.

I picked up the receiver on my desk. “Yes?”

“Hi...Dr. Montgomery. You have a visitor.” I glanced at the clock. It was eleven minutes to twelve. Melanie was a few minutes early.

“Send her in.” I grinned and hung up. Turning my attention back to Mom, I smiled as I anticipated my girl walking through the door. “Hey, Mom, I have to go...”

My mouth seized mid-sentence and sweat gathered at my forehead. I should have been paying more attention, but I’d been distracted by the conversation with Mom and thoughts of Melanie. My body hadn’t kicked in fast enough to tell me she wasn’t there.

But Vanessa was.

I hadn’t seen Vanessa since that fateful night. I had relied on correspondence from my attorney and ignored all her calls and texts. I didn’t want to talk to her, see her, or deal with her.

She apparently didn’t get the picture, because she entered my office and closed the door behind her. She turned to me, her chin held high as she eyed me with confidence.

I desperately tried to avoid looking at her stomach. The large protuberance seemed to mock me. Vanessa’s tight white T-shirt clung to the swollen mound, demanding I acknowledge what I’d done, but my entire being rejected it.

My voice cracked when I regained enough mental function to speak, leaving me with a strangled stream of words. “What...what the hell are you doing here?”

Vanessa’s blue eyes flashed fire, and then she forced a smile, artificially sweet. “You weren’t returning my calls, so I decided to stop by and pay you a little visit.”

I stared at her, willing myself to control my temper. “I told you I didn’t want to hear from you unless it was something directly related to the baby, and for that, you can go through my lawyer. I trust you have his number?” My voice took on a condescending edge as I watched her resolve waver, her eyes darting to her feet before she looked back at me.

“Daniel.” She sighed, disheartened. “Why can’t you give us a chance? Let’s be friends and see where it goes. I don’t want to raise this baby alone.”

Was she serious?

“First of all, I don’t want to be your friend. Second, you’re not going to be raising him by yourself. He’s going to be with me half the time. This,” I said, pointing back and forth between the two of us, “isn’t going to happen.”

“Well, Daniel, in case you’d forgotten,
this
already happened!” She rubbed both hands over her belly, emphasizing the biggest mistake I’d ever made. “And you really didn’t seem to mind it then, did you? Don’t you think it’s time you stepped up and acted like a man instead of leaving me alone to deal with all of this by myself?”

A brief wave of guilt roll through me before remembering her that night. I wasn’t the selfish one. She had made a choice for me, a choice that would affect me for the rest of my life.

I pointed at her stomach, my disdain wiping away every trace of sympathy I’d had. “That was your fault,” I hissed, the pent up hatred and blame I felt for her pouring freely, “You did this.” I shoved my finger closer. “And I never wanted this...so don’t you dare come in here and tell me how I should be handling it! I don’t want anything to do with you, Vanessa.” I stormed across the room and flung the door open. “Now get out of my office and don’t come back.” I leveled my eyes at her, the threat clear in my voice.

Chapter Twenty-One

As soon as I walked through the door, I knew something was wrong. The feeling was just…off. I could feel him—the energy—but it was frenzied and distressed.

I looked toward Daniel’s secretary for some kind of indication. Her eyes grew wide when she recognized me. We both turned when we heard Daniel’s heated voice. I’d
never
heard him speak like that to anyone. I rushed to his office, panicked and unable to comprehend what would draw a reaction like that from him. My feet felt momentarily disconnected from my body, and I fought to stay upright when I saw Vanessa. The sight of her was like a punch in the gut, a knife to the chest. In a fleeting moment, it all came upon me, crushing, crashing, pulsing—uncertainty, resentment, jealousy, the baby—
his
baby.

I couldn’t see, couldn’t breathe. Anxiety rippled through me, nipping my nerves, tearing me down, taunting me with what I could not have. Would it always be there, lurking and begging for release? How could I still feel this way after everything we’d been through? After what he’d said and what he’d shown? How could there be any lingering doubt?

“This is why you don’t want me? I knew it. You’re really going to take this slut over me?
I’m
the one carrying your child.”

Somehow her spiteful words that were meant to cut me down offered me a reason for conviction. Suddenly, it became clear. Those destructive thoughts and words had no place in me, because I knew he would take me over her, over anyone else. For the first time, I truly believed it.

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