Better Than Another Man (7 page)

I lay back too, but when I relaxed my hand and felt the stickiness of his jizz on my fingers, I immediately wanted to wash it off. Even after the enjoyment that I’d given and received, just like before, it felt all weird. And I hated myself for feeling the way I did. I wanted to be here, for fuck’s sake, so what was this feeling of wrongdoing and depravity that kept descending over me whenever I did? I didn’t feel like this after I’d been with a woman.

I eased out of bed.

“Where ya goin’?” he asked, and reached sleepily for where I’d just been.

“Just going to wash. Be right back.”

I bathed and went for a piss, and by the time I came back to bed, Carey was asleep, snoring softly. I slipped back into bed. I watched him for a minute before tucking my head in between his neck and shoulder. He looped an arm loosely around me and mumbled my name. This was where I wanted to be.

Chapter Six

“Bryan?” I woke slowly to the sound of Carey’s voice. “Bry, I’ve gotta go into the office for a few hours.” He sat with a hip perched on the bed, caressing my chest.

“It’s Saturday,” I complained, groggily trying to focus on him. He was dressed in a dark three-piece suit, stark white shirt and blood red tie. I wanted to tug on it, pull him down and kiss him until he decided to stay. “You look good,” I murmured.

“I shouldn’t be long. I ought to be back by lunchtime. Okay?” He ruffled my messy hair. “Go back to sleep. You’ll probably still be in bed when I get back, you won’t even have chance to miss me.” He grinned cockily, looking down at me, knowing damn well that I would. He gave me a quick kiss on the mouth before heading for the bedroom door.

“Oh, and by the way, we’re sleeping in your bed tonight,” Carey informed.

My stomach twinged at the implication. “Yeah, and why’s that?”

“Your bed could use some cum stains, too,” he said, his voice fading as he disappeared.

I sat up and looked around. He had a point—the sheets were a little crusty. I lay back and went back to sleep.

* * * *

I had a hell of a time trying to keep my mind on my work. I couldn’t wait to get back home. To Bryan. This was more than I could have possibly ever have imagined. Well, that wasn’t true, my imagination had already taken Bryan in every way possible and vice versa.

It was a little strange to see him so out of his element. I had always looked up to him—followed and emulated him in every way, trying to be more like him, so that people would accept me. Until I realised that being something I wasn’t just to please everyone else, didn’t make me happy. But Bryan was always the dominant one in our friendship. Now he was looking to me to take the lead. I was the one he was counting on to teach him. My stomach took flight from the thought. I wanted to show him everything, but I’d have to take it slow, or he’d go running and I might scare him away forever.

* * * *

I didn’t stay in bed until noon, but I did sleep late. I wasn’t really a morning person, like Carey. I decided to change the bedding. I went to the linen closet and pulled out some fresh sheets. I spread the fitted sheet across the bed, but my knee caught on the partially open drawer that Carey had pulled the lube from.

“Ouch, you bitch!” I cursed and was about to slam the drawer shut, but the collection of doodads within stopped me.

I pulled it open, then wished I hadn’t. The only things in our bedside tables that we had in common was the lube and the condoms. The rest, made my butt hole clench. Toys and dildos, butt plugs and some other grotesquely shaped fluorescent playthings that I didn’t even want to know about.

“Jesus Christ,” I said, to the empty room. “What am I doing?” I sat down on the edge of the bed and stared at the colourful implements before closing the drawer slowly. I couldn’t imagine those things inside me, or using them on my pal. The thought of anal sex did not turn me on in the least, but I knew that I was going to have to address that issue, and soon. Maybe even tonight.

As much as Carey said we’d take it slow and see where this thing between us was going to go, I knew that was what he would ultimately expect from any relationship, sooner or later. It was what fulfilled him. And as much as I wanted to satisfy him and return some of the pleasure that he gave me, I didn’t think I was the man who could do the job.

I finished making the bed and tried not to think about it. I had lunch ready for Carey when he came in.

We sat at the table eating while he told me about his morning and solidifying his plans for his move to Chicago. “Do you think you might want to go house hunting with me?”

“Sure, but what about the house you’re going to build?”

“That’s going to have to come later. I can’t afford it right now. I have too many student loans to repay. I’ll have to rent for a while until I get established. I actually had the designs out today, though. I’ve learned so many new things from some of the other architects. I keep making changes. I’ll have it perfected by the time I have the funds to construct. I made some great new improvements to the layout of your room.”

I watched him. He was always so animated and excited when he talked about his house. Our house. I wondered if that would ever be, us living together as we were now. With us moving into different phases of our lives as we were, I wasn’t sure if we’d ever co-habitat again. “Yeah, can I see?” I didn’t want to think about that possibility or dampen Carey’s excitement.

“Later,” he said, with a wave of his hand, dismissively. “Can you just picture us old doddering fools walking with canes passing in the hallway, racing each other to the bathroom?”

“Yeah, the elderly odd couple,” I joked.

Carey stood, chuckling, and took his empty plate over to the sink. “Have you given any more thought to coaching?” he asked, turning to face me.

“Not really. I haven’t thought past getting my dad back on his feet.” Was that his way of asking if I was going to move to Chicago with him?

“Seriously, Bryan, what the fuck are you going to do with the rest of your life?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ve never known.” I joined him, placing my plate on top of his. “Nothing feels right.” I didn’t just mean work-wise, either, and I think he got that. “I don’t want a career like you, Care, I just need a job to pay the bills. It doesn’t really matter, does it?”

“I just want you to be happy,” he said, cupping my cheek, then he kissed me softly. My body warmed and my cock stirred. Carey wound his arms around me and pulled me closer, rubbing his own growing erection against mine. We ran our hands over each other’s backs, as the kiss got hotter.

“Close your eyes,” he whispered. I did as he asked as he worked his hands down my chest, unfastening my jeans. I helped him push the stiff denim over my hips. He released my cock from my loose boxers.

A buzz of excitement ran through me as I anticipated his touch, but then I tensed when I felt his warm breath fan across my abdomen, indicating that he’d taken his knees in front of me. I placed my hands on either side of his neck, pulling upward, signalling for him to stand.

“No, Care, don’t,” I begged. I couldn’t allow him do that to me. The thought of him giving me head was both tantalising and shocking to me all at once. But he’d known what my reaction would be, that’s why he’d instructed me to close my eyes.

He patted my stomach soothingly. “It’s alright. I won’t do anything you don’t want. Stop me at any point.” He took my dick in his hands like before skilfully stroking until I couldn’t think. I made every attempt to clear my mind and just enjoy the gift he was about to give me.

Carey ran his tongue across the tip of my straining shaft. His soft warm lips closed over the slit, sucking ever so softly before he fluttered his tongue into it, licking the liquid that had gathered. “Mmm,” he murmured.

“Ohh,” I breathed, placing my backside against the counter ledge for support, splaying my legs slightly. I released my hands from around his neck, no longer fighting it, and ran my hands into his soft hair, holding him.

Carey then took the pulsing bulb of my cock into his mouth. He gripped my jewels in one hand as the other held my hard rod steady. Carey ran his tongue from tip to base, the sensation making my toes curl. It felt even more incredible when he stopped to tongue the little bud of sensitivity just below the head.

Carey opened his mouth wide and took as much of my length as he could.

It was like he inhaled me. The heat and the wetness within felt like heaven. I think I actually whimpered.

Carey slowly withdrew, firming his lips as he eased back upward. He began to move, slowly at first, picking up the pace, sucking my cock like I’d never experienced before. I’d been given some fantastic blowjobs in my day from some very talented ladies, but nothing compared to this. I could almost hear my juices rushing.

Oh, God, I wouldn’t last long, and man did I want it to go on. It felt so fucking good. I tried to relax my muscles in an attempt to slow down my raging need.

Carey maintained a steady grip and release action on my balls as he continued to go down on me. He used his other hand, pumping in tandem with his hot gifted mouth, but when he curved his fingers and started that sweet circular motion that he’d introduced to me just yesterday, it sent me into convulsions. I grabbed his head and forced my cock deep into his throat, thrusting mechanically, riding the exquisite wave of orgasm.

“Oh, fuck, Care, oh fuck!” I groaned. “I’m sorry.”

He didn’t seem to mind—he swallowed repeatedly as I continued to ejaculate into his mouth.

Carey finally released my dwindling cock. I pulled his head against my stomach and hugged him, so grateful and euphoric. I felt so close to him. He stood and looked at me. His face was ruddy with exertion and arousal. My thumbprints marked his cheeks where I’d held him.

I smoothed my thumbs over the discolouration. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” He kissed me and I tasted my own bitterness from his swollen lips. I shuddered involuntarily.

I so wanted to reciprocate. I palmed his hardness through his dress pants, determined not to think about it. I knelt and undid his pants, releasing him as he’d done me.

Carey splayed his hands into my hair. “You don’t have to do this,” he gasped, but I knew by the strain in his voice that he really wanted it.

I took a deep breath and smelled the musk that was Carey. It turned me on again and my dick actually twitched. I couldn’t believe it had anything left to give.

I closed my eyes and took the head of my best friend’s cock into my mouth. I didn’t know what I was expecting him to taste like, but he didn’t taste bad, I decided. I licked the drop of pre-cum from his slit and didn’t mind that either. I was doing good.

* * * *

I looked down at the top of Bryan’s head, revelling in the fact that we were both here in this moment. This was a dream come true for me.

Bryan was timid and unsure of himself. It made me love him all the more, that he would try to do this for me when I knew giving another man head was not on his bucket list.

His hesitance was very arousing. It was like the first time for me all over again, the way I’d always wished it could have been.

Bryan licked around the tip, then took the end into the heat of his mouth, closing his lips. Then he paused and sucked, withdrawing, going deeper with the next swallow. The feeling was exquisite. I had to fight the urge to grip his head and fuck his mouth like I wanted to. He’d never go for that.

Bryan inched his way down my shaft until he began to clear his throat.

* * * *

It was when I started to go deeper that I ran into some trouble. My throat was tightening up. I wasn’t even close to the gag-reflex at the back of my throat yet. I took a deep breath and tried again.

Carey reached down between us. Taking my hand, he wrapped it around his cock firmly. “Use your hand as a guide. When your lips hit your fingers you’ve gone far enough,” he instructed, his voice strained from arousal. “Work your hand to make up the distance,” he finished, smoothing a hand over my hair, encouragingly.

I did as he directed, although clumsily. As he got more turned on his skin heated and I could actually feel the fluid rushing under his thin yet iron-like skin. I could feel the restraint in him as he tried not to thrust.

“I’m so close, Bry, stop.” Carey lifted my chin with his index finger, signifying I should stand. We both knew that I wouldn’t be able to swallow.

Gaining my feet, I faced him. His teeth were clenched as if he was in agony, his neck muscles corded, his eyes heavy-lidded and sexy. He guided my hands back to his straining cock.

I took his lips in a ravenous kiss while I stroked him. I still couldn’t believe how much I enjoyed kissing him—it made up for everything that I couldn’t do. Nothing in my life so far could compare to what he made me feel when we were joined in this way. He held my cheeks as I tangled my tongue sensually with his. I lost myself in him.

Carey tensed, grabbed my ass, and pulled me closer. His mouth opened as he verbalized his pleasure, ending our kiss, to my disappointment. But I scattered little pecks along his jaw line as he rammed his cock between my fists. Finally, he shuddered and erupted all over my hands and his dress shirt.

He rested his forehead against mine, breathing deeply.

“You are determined to ruin not only my sheets but my wardrobe as well?” He gave a teasing grin, his eyes remaining heavy with latent arousal.

“Sorry.”

He chuckled.

“No, I mean I’m sorry that I couldn’t, ya know.”

“It’s okay,” he crooned, rubbing the back of my neck.

“I want to be able to give back to you, but how am I going to do that when I can’t even offer you the same pleasure you do me?” I exhaled in frustration. Not only was I inadequate but I also wasn’t sure that I could overcome the barriers set up in my mind.

Angling me toward the sink, Carey ran my hands under the tap. As he dried them with a dishtowel, he looked into my eyes. “You just did more than I ever thought you’d be able to. It felt incredible, Bry. I don’t want you to stress out about this. It doesn’t matter, it will either get better or it won’t. You can’t force yourself to do something you don’t want to do. And I don’t want you to. That’s not what this is about for me. What’s happening between us, it’s not all about sex. You want to be close to me and I want that too. Intimacy can be just as fulfilling and powerful as sex.”