Between the Sheets (19 page)

The door whips open and closed before
I can open my mouth to respond.

He’s gone.

And all I can do is cry.

When my mom and dad arrive back at the
cabin after one of their long walks, my dad peeks into my
room.

“
What happened?” He lowers
himself onto my bed and sits beside me.

“
Ty happened. He found out
about the baby and showed up here.”

My dad shakes his head with a sigh. “I
knew this was going to happen, Melissa. You can’t ever make things
easy. How is he?”

“
What do you mean, how is
he? What about me?”

He stands letting out another sigh.
“You, young lady, have created this mess. You should have been
honest with him from the beginning. I should have called him
myself, but I wanted you to come to your senses. Looks like it took
you too long.”

He leaves my room with a huff. I know
I screwed up royally. What I don’t need is my dad reminding me of
my mistakes. I need his support. Not his judgment. If I don’t have
my parents on my side, then what do I have left? Who do I have
left? I’m sure Shelly is ready to kick my ass right about now. I
can’t imagine she wants to be the shoulder I can cry on.

I curl myself around my body pillow,
trying to disappear. I’m an absolute mess. My baby is going to be
born to a mother who can’t get her shit together and to a daddy who
hates her mama. What have I done?

My mom takes her turn, coming in
quietly and closing the door behind her.

“
I’ve already taken a
beating.” I cover my head with my pillow. “If you think it’s your
turn, you can leave before you get started.”

“
Don’t you get fresh with
me, mija. I’m not here to give you another lickin’, I’m here to see
what I can do.”

I remove the pillow from my head and
she reaches out to touch my cheek. “I’m sorry, Mom,” I start to
mumble, but the tears stop me from saying anything else.

“
I know. He’ll come back,
you know. Right now, he’s just hurt. Give him time.”

“
I know,” I sob. “He said
he wanted to be a father to our baby, but he wasn’t sure he wanted
me anymore.” The words barely make it from my mouth. My throat is
so tight with sobs I can hardly breathe. “It was like a stab to the
heart. Nothing will ever hurt as much as seeing the disappointment
I saw in Tyler’s eyes tonight. I want to believe he can forgive me.
Like him, I’m just not so sure.”

She covers my hand with hers and pats
gently. “Well, what do you think that letter you wrote did to him?”
she asks.

“
Karma sucks ass. I thought
I was doing what’s best for him. I still don’t know how I can ask
him to leave his students. They need him a lot more than mine need
me. He gives them so much more than I can.”

“
Well, maybe that’s
something to consider.”

“
Are you saying I should
move up there?” Just the thought makes my heart break into even
more pieces. I can’t leave her or my dad. Or Shel. That’s if she’ll
ever talk to me again, I’ve screwed this up so horribly.

“
I’m not saying anything. I
wouldn’t want to see you go, but I’d understand if you did. Love is
a crazy thing. It makes you do crazy things, but when you find the
one you love, you can’t just let that go. You and Tyler were made
for each other. I’m not blind. I could see it blossoming when you
were kids. I didn’t encourage it because he was older than you, but
I knew it would happen someday. Unfortunately, Nick got in the way
but now, nothing should keep you apart. And definitely not now that
you’re having a baby. But where you live should be something you
decide together.”

“
What should I do, Mama? I
can’t let him go. I have to get him back. I love him so much not
having him here is tearing me apart.”

She pats my shoulder, giving it a soft
squeeze. “Only you can answer that.”

And then she leaves me to my own
thoughts. The ones that won’t fucking shut up for the life of
me.

I grab for the remote on the other
side of the bed and click on the TV.

Channel after channel, there are
nothing but romances on. Ugh. I don’t need this.

It must be the bottom of the hour
because I keep flipping from one happy ending to the
next.

First, Tom Hanks reveals that he is
really Meg Ryan’s secret internet lover.

Then, Adrian Grenier slides down the
time capsule into the arms of Melissa Joan Hart.

Justin Long shows up on Ginnifer
Goodwin’s doorstep with a pen in hand.

And the final nail in the coffin,
Michael Vartan meets Drew Barrymore on the pitcher’s
mound.

Damn, I
am
a movie whore.

And I’m a movie whore that knows a lot
about happy endings and making the romantic grand
gesture.

I was wrong.

Ty and I do have a future together.
And it doesn’t matter where we live, as long as we’re
together.

I can’t just sit here and cry my heart
out. I need to pick myself up and get my ass out there to find my
man.

My happy ending awaits.

This shit is far from over.

Melissa

Shel picks up on the first
ring.

“
Where’s your brother?” I
ask as I pull on the only pair of jeans I can squeeze my legs into.
I can’t button them and the zipper only goes up part of the way,
but my long top covers the waistband.

“
He’s at home, Mel. What
the hell were you thinking?” she yells at me. And I deserve
it.

“
Shel, I’m sorry I worried
you. I’m sorry I lied to you. It’s been torturous keeping something
so important from you. But I just needed time to figure things
out.”

There’s a lot of sighing going around.
She lets out a very dramatic humph. “Well, did you figure it out?”
The way she asks the question makes me smile. She’s no longer
shouting. And she sounds more amused than anything. Whew. I just
might be able to keep her.

“
Yeah. Just took me longer
than I thought. I’m sorry, Shel. I really am. I hope you can
forgive me because I really need my best friend right
now.”

“
I’m here. I always will
be.”

“
I gotta go.” It’s been
long enough. I need to fix everything and it can’t wait another
minute.

“
I love you,
Melly.”

“
I love you too.” And
because I can’t help it, I squeal, “We’re pregnant at the same
time. Our babies are only going to be a month apart.”

“
They’ll grow up together,”
she says, and I can hear the frog in her throat. I know the sound
well. A toad has taken up permanent residence in mine for the
duration.

By the time I get to the airport it’s
well past midnight and I have to wait for four hours for the next
flight to San Francisco. I tried getting an earlier one to Oakland
and Sacramento but I didn’t have any luck there. The damn plane is
delayed another hour before it taxis to the runaway and we finally
depart.

The ride is smooth and short,
thankfully. I didn’t check a bag. I only brought a backpack with a
change of clothes. If all goes as planned, Ty and I will get back
together and I can fly back home a happy woman and gather the rest
of my things, and my dogs. If I have to move, then so be it. I have
to take that chance and be happy with the man I love. I’ve already
tried living without him and that didn’t go over well. I just have
to grow a pair and leave my mama’s nest. It will be hard to say
goodbye to my parents and Shel but the alternative is even
worse.

I take a cab from the airport to Ty’s
apartment. I pay the guy and run up the stairs. As soon as I reach
his door, I begin pounding. But there is no answer. I knock again.
Nothing. He’s seriously going to pretend he’s not home. I look at
my watch. The center isn’t open this early. He has to be
here.

Another apartment opens and a woman
steps outside. “I don’t think anyone’s home,” she says as she locks
her place.

“
Oh, okay.
Thanks.”

“
If you want to sit and
wait, there’s a staircase leading up to the third floor at the end
of the hall. It’d probably be easier to get up from the steps than
from sitting on the floor.” She looks at my belly with a
smile.

“
Definitely. Thanks again,”
I say as she walks away.

Another hour goes by and Ty still
isn’t home. I flip through pages of the latest celebrity gossip mag
I got at the airport to kill time. I’m not known for my patience,
but for the first time I finally feel at ease. I know what I’m
going to do. I know what I’m about to offer Ty and I truly think
things will be okay. Don’t get me wrong, I’m nervous. But the
anxiousness comes more from wanting to see him, hold him, and kiss
him again, than from waiting.

I’m just about to start an article
about who cheated on who when I hear some chatter.

I peek my head out into the hall and I
recognize one of the faces. It’s that hippy chick from the center.
The therapist with the long flowing gauze skirt. Taylor. My mouth
opens to call out to her when she stops in front of Ty’s apartment
and takes out a key.

“
So what are you going to
do first?” her friend asks.

“
I don’t know yet. Ty’s
pretty laid back. He said I can redecorate however I want.” And
then they walk into his apartment and the door shuts behind
them.

He’s moved on in less than twenty four
hours. Or maybe he was doing her on the side all this
time.

I guess he’s sure now.

He doesn’t want me anymore.

My eyes open way too early in the
morning. After arriving back home late last night, you’d think I’d
be able to sleep in. But no. My stomach is like my body’s own alarm
clock and lets me know with loud rolling growls that my baby needs
food.

I crawl out of bed and head into my
kitchen with about as much energy as my first period
students.

I open my fridge and realize I have
shit to eat. I haven’t been home in weeks and there’s no man here
to make me a mouthwatering breakfast.

No. He’s making breakfast for Taylor
right now. He’s forgotten all about me and my baby. I can’t believe
he’s shacking up with someone else already. If the wait at the
airport to get to San Francisco was bad, the wait for the flight
home was even worse. I plugged a set of headphones into my ears and
listened to Midnight Hour on repeat, drowning my sorrows in the
lyrics about love gone right and love gone bad. Tears slid down my
cheeks until the well was dry and all I was left with was a
headache and swollen red eyes.

That was last night and I doubt today
will get any better. I’ll just stay away from mirrors so I don’t
have to see myself shattered. Feeling it is horrible
enough.

My belly rumbles, my little one
calling out for some grub.

Since my cupboards are bare except for
some microwave popcorn, crackers and wine, I go back to my bedroom
to get dressed. Fast food is calling my name.

After pulling through the closest fast
food joint, I dread going back to my empty house. I make a right
turn at the next light for a quick detour and head to work instead.
School starts in a week so I need to get into my classroom anyway
and clean up. Maybe the endless task will help me take my mind off
things.

When I arrive, I park as close to my
building as possible, pull on my shades and haul ass to my
classroom. I know I’m not alone, but if I get in and close my door
fast enough, no one will notice I’m here, and I won’t have to
explain my sickly appearance.

I sit down and arrange my breakfast on
my desk. I attack the greasy hash browns first. Instantly, I regret
the choice as my face starts to feel oily and it’s like I can sense
the zits forming with each bite. I toss what’s left in the trash
and move on to my breakfast croissant sandwich. The melted cheese
dazzles my taste buds and I lean back into my office chair to enjoy
each bite.

When I’m finished with my fat-infused
breakfast, I ditch the trash in one of the wastebaskets near the
door and walk to the center of my room. I do a 360, soaking in each
wall and trying to envision what I’d like it to look like this
year. Last year’s posters of my favorite Van Gogh paintings just
won’t cut it after seeing the student work at Ty’s art center.
Maybe I should call our art teacher and see if I can snag some old
work so I can decorate my room. I doubt he’d mind. I’m sure he’d be
happy to see it up on the walls for all to see. Or maybe I should
wait until school starts and ask my students if any of them have
some pieces they’d like to show off.

I decide to leave it alone for now and
I fire up my computer. I’ll start with planning my first week. I
have to get all my handouts ready. Pick readings to interest my
kids. Come up with a writing sample so I can evaluate their skill
level. So much to do and so little time.