Billion-Dollar Brain (22 page)

‘What on?’

‘Duty officer,’ I lied. ‘They put me on it while I was away. It’s always us part-time people who get
the worst duties. I’ll be back around midday. You’ll still be here?’

‘I’d like to stay two or three days.’

‘Sure,’ I said. ‘I would like that.’

Harvey hit a minor chord.

‘It’s about Signe,’ Harvey said. ‘She’s high on you, you know.’ I said nothing. Harvey said, ‘I wish you’d come to Helsinki with me. To help me talk her into coming away with me. With you to help me I’m sure I’d make it.’

It was going too well. It was too easy and I mistrusted it, or perhaps I was seeing my role in a new light.

‘I don’t know, Harvey,’ I said.

‘I won’t ask you any more favours,’ Harvey said. ‘Not ever. And we’ll make you godfather of our first child.’ He played the opening bars of the Wedding March.

‘OK Harvey,’ I said. ‘We’ll go to Helsinki together.’

Harvey played a little trill.

I left Harvey in the flat. I felt sure that he wouldn’t want to go anywhere without me. But I didn’t feel so sure about it that I called off the man who was still watching the flat. From the car I phoned the office. Harriman and the duty officer would meet me. Chico was the duty officer.

I phoned Dawlish and told him that I wanted to seal off the MRE thefts at once. I suggested that we let the Porton Security people grab the agent who was working inside the Experimental Establishment when he arrived next morning, but I would deliver Pike into custody myself.

‘Have someone who can take Pike from me between two and three
A.M.
,’ I said. ‘He’ll have a written statement ready by then.’

‘What sort of story?’

‘One with a beginning,’ I punned clumsily.

‘That’s exactly the sort of story one wants for a few days,’ Dawlish said. He laughed, he liked puns.

I went out to Pike’s place in the country with Harriman and Chico. It was a cold night and the wind buffeted the car like a riot mob. Ralph Pike’s house was in darkness, but the driveway of Doctor Felix Pike’s mansion was crowded with motor cars of all shapes and sizes and every light in the house was on. The downstairs windows had the curtains open and yellow light fell across the lawn. Inside a crowd in evening dress were drinking and talking and beyond them on the far side of the room couples were dancing to the music of an elaborate gramophone and six loud-speakers. The Spanish manservant opened the door until he noticed we weren’t in evening dress. ‘It’s not good where you have parked the car.’

I said, ‘It’s not good anywhere around here,’ and we eased our way in without further ceremony. ‘Where’s Dr Pike?’ I said.

The manservant said, ‘He perhaps is busy. My master…’ ‘Get going,’ I said roughly. He spun round and headed into the smoke and noise. Harriman and Chico were sniffing at the engravings and waving away trays full of drink. Pike appeared in a dinner-suit, maroon with silk facings and shoulders padded like he’d left the hanger in. He smoothed his brocade waistcoat and held his smile tight enough to prevent the lower half of his face falling off. ‘Dempsey,’ he exclaimed, meeting my eye suddenly as though he hadn’t been watching me from across the
room. ‘To what do we owe this honour?’ I said nothing.

Harriman said, ‘Doctor Pike, Doctor Rodney Felix Pike?’

‘What’s the trouble?’ said Pike. He gripped the knot of his bow tie and pushed it hard against his thyroid.

‘Are you Doctor Pike?’ said Harriman.

‘Yes,’ said Pike. ‘But you can damn well…’

‘I think we had better go somewhere where we can talk,’ said Harriman speaking at the same time as Pike but slightly louder. They stared at each other in silence for a moment.

‘Very well,’ said Pike. He turned and began to walk up the stairs. ‘Johnson,’ he called over his shoulder, ‘send champagne and chicken for four up to the study.’ Only Pike would think of calling his Spanish servant Johnson.

The study was the sort of room that doctors keep in their private houses for tax purposes. There was just the light of the standard lamp shining on the oak panelling and on sabres and flintlock guns lined up over the fireplace. On the antique writing-table there were copies of
Country Life
and three Bristol glass decanters. We all sat down in the Queen Anne chairs, except Pike, who walked across to the door to make quite sure it was closed. ‘Perhaps you’ll tell me who the devil you are,’ he said finally.

‘Inspector Simpson, Special Branch, sir,’ said Harriman. ‘This is Sergeant Arkwright,’ he indicated Chico.

‘What about this fellow?’ said Pike pointing to me.

‘I’ll be coming to him, sir,’ said Harriman. There was a knock at the door and the white-jacketed man came in with a bottle of champagne, four glasses and a plateful of sandwiches. He said, ‘It’s nicely chilled, sir. Will you be wanting the ice-bucket?’

‘No, that’s all right,’ Pike said. He was standing in front of the glass-fronted bookcase twisting the key in the lock absent-mindedly. When the waiter had gone Harriman pointed at me. ‘We have this man in custody in connexion with the theft of certain public stores from the Microbiological Research Establishment at Porton, said premises being a prohibited place in the meaning of the Official Secrets Act,’ Harriman looked at Pike. ‘I must caution you, sir, that anything you say may be used in evidence.’

Downstairs the gramophone played mambo. Pike was looking at the books in his bookcase. ‘I’d like to see your warrant cards,’ he said. They gave them to him and I said, ‘They’ve got us, Pike. It’s no good your thinking that you’re going to get away with it while I go to prison for twenty years.’ Pike studied the cards and handed them back as though he hadn’t heard me, then he walked across to the telephone. His way was blocked by Chico. Harriman said, ‘I wouldn’t advise that yet. Not yet I wouldn’t. After all you have a lot of guests downstairs. We are being very
civilized. You don’t want us to go downstairs and interview your friends.’

‘What do you want?’ said Pike. There was a knock at the door and then it burst open. The white-jacketed man said, ‘The house next door, sir, a chimney on fire.’ The woman with mauve hair was right behind him. ‘It’s blazing, Felix,’ she said. ‘Shall I waken Nigel?’ The music downstairs stopped abruptly. The white-jacketed man tried to reassure the woman. ‘They look worse than they are, madam. It’s not dangerous.’ He looked round at us, awaiting instruction. ‘Call the fire brigade,’ said Pike. ‘That’s what they’re paid for.’ Pike turned back to the books. ‘Big sparks,’ said the woman, ‘falling on to the lawn, but I’ve only just got Nigel to sleep.’ She went out. Soon the music began again. Harriman said, ‘This man says he collected the stolen items from you.’

‘What stolen items?’ said Pike.

‘Eggs. Fertile hens’ eggs containing a live virus. These same articles being received by you knowing that they were stolen public stores.’ Pike turned back to his bookcase. We all looked at each other. Quiet. The tick of the clock seemed very loud. The woman’s voice called, ‘Felix. It’s getting worse and they haven’t arrived yet.’ Pike was standing immediately behind me. It was so quiet in the room that I could hear Pike breathing even though the music still continued downstairs. The woman called again but Pike still didn’t answer.

I said to Harriman, ‘I’ll tell you about it.’ I turned to look up at Pike. I said, ‘If you want to pretend you
laid
the eggs that’s up to you.’

Pike stared at me but said nothing. I turned to Harriman. ‘We’re caught, so that’s all there is to it. Pike’s brother…’ I felt a stunning blow against the side of the head, my teeth clanged together and the room seemed to go soft for a moment like a movie dissolve. I shook my head, half expecting it to fall off and roll under the bookcase so we’d have to prod around with sticks to get it back. I pressed my hand against my head. There was a discordant noise in my ears and the room was rippling in waves of bright blue light. Harriman had Pike in an arm-lock and Chico was holding an antique pistol that was red and shiny at the muzzle end. The woman called again. The klaxon noise and blue flashes filled the room.

‘For God’s sake,’ Pike was saying to me. ‘Haven’t you got any self-respect?’

Outside there was the hoo-haw of a fire-engine klaxon and through the window I could see a Pump Water Tender moving cautiously into the drive, its flashing blue light making a pattern on the ceiling.

‘If you want to pretend you
laid
the eggs,’ I said to Pike again and rubbed my head. Pike made a movement but it wasn’t a serious attempt to get free. The woman downstairs called, ‘Felix dear. You’d better come and speak to the firemen.’ Then I heard her say, ‘Perhaps he can’t hear.’

Harriman said, ‘I was hoping for a little more cooperation. Doctor.’

‘I’m busy, darling,’ Pike called. The gramophone began to play ‘When I Fall in Love’ and there was a sound of dignified clapping as the guests continued to demonstrate the never-say-die spirit.

‘I suppose you are going to deny you met me in the park and brought me here to meet your brother,’ I said.

Harriman said, ‘I’d be interested to hear your answer to that, sir.’

‘I’ve nothing to say,’ Pike said.

Harriman looked round the room as though checking how many of us there were. Chico was wrapping up the antique pistol in a grubby handkerchief. ‘Assault with firearm,’ I said. ‘That’s a felony.’ Harriman let go of Pike and spoke very quietly to him. ‘Quite honestly, sir, I’ve no respect for people like this.’ He moved his head towards me. ‘Scum of the earth, just out for what they can get. But they know the way the law works, you’ve got to give them that. He knows the Public Stores Act isn’t so serious and he could well have only a misdemeanour charge for receiving. I would have liked your story on paper first. I wanted to use your evidence to nail him. But he’s determined to have it the other way round. He’ll come out unscathed. You’ll see. It’s idealists like you that suffer. They always do.’ There was a brief knock at the door and it swung open. ‘You’ve got to
come, Felix,’ said the woman’s voice desperately. She pushed a red-faced fireman into the room ahead of her. ‘Tell him he’s got to come downstairs,’ she said. With the door open the gramophone music was much louder and I could hear the radio-phone of the fire-engine and the noise of the pump idling.

The fireman said, ‘I don’t want to alarm your guests but it’s getting a bit of a hold, sir.’

‘What do you expect me to do?’ said Pike in a high-pitched voice.

‘There’s no danger, sir,’ the fireman said. ‘We’ve got our first-aid lines out but we’d like to get the appliances into the drive before we connect the main hose. We’re blocking the street at present and your guests’ cars are blocking us. There’s no danger but we’ve got to have room to move.’ He ran a finger round the chinstrap of his helmet.

The woman said, ‘They’ve got to have room to move, Felix.’

‘Wait a moment,’ Pike said, ‘wait a moment.’ He pushed Mrs Pike and the fireman out through the door, closing it and turning the key.

Harriman continued to speak to Pike as though nothing else was happening. ‘Did you know these eggs were being sent to the Soviet Union, sir?’

‘That’s ridiculous,’ Pike said slowly and patiently. ‘We are all members of the Free Latvia movement. We have been working with the Americans. I am an American secret agent. All our planning is
devoted to removing the Communists from Latvia.’ He explained it to Harriman as though he was becoming a new member.

‘The cars,’ I heard the fireman shouting outside the door.

I said to Harriman, ‘I insist upon being allowed to write out my statement now.’

‘Very well,’ said Harriman. ‘Go along with him, Sergeant Arkwright,’ he said to Chico and the two of us made for the door.

‘No,’ said Pike loudly. ‘I must go with him.’ He pushed past the fireman and the woman and overtook us on the stairs. Behind us I heard the fireman saying, ‘But I told him he’s not in any sort of danger. He’s not in danger at all.’

We took Doctor Felix Pike to the Ministry of Defence. Three policemen were waiting in the hall and they had cleared a couple of offices for us. Pike offered to make a statement. Harriman put a sheet of paper on the table in front of him and Pike began writing. The first paragraph gave his date and place of birth (Riga in Latvia) and the social condition of his parents. The rest of the statement was little more than a political manifesto advocating immediate armed invasion of Latvia to overthrow Communism. When Harriman told him that the immediate concern was theft of virus from the Government Research Establishment at Porton, Pike got very excited. He tore up his statement and folded his arms. He sat
there gleaming in his white shirt like a man in a detergent ad.

‘You can’t hold me here against my will,’ said Pike.

‘Yes I can, sir,’ said Harriman. ‘I am holding you under Section 195 of the Army Act. A person holding Army property without explanation may be arrested without warrant. You are not under arrest but you will stay here until I get an explanation.’

‘I want to see my lawyer,’ said Pike.

‘And I want an explanation,’ said Harriman, a duologue they repeated sixteen times.

Finally Pike said, ‘I’m a doctor. You should show me a little respect.’

‘Doctoring isn’t a club for supermen,’ Harriman said gently.

‘Oh isn’t it,’ said Pike. ‘Well sometimes I wonder. When I see some of my sub-human patients, I wonder.’

One of the Ministry police—a thin man in his middle forties—walked across to Pike and slapped him across the face with his open hand. Three smacks seemed very loud in that room. The policeman’s hand moved faster than the eye could follow.

‘Don’t start arguing with them,’ the policeman said affably to Harriman. ‘You’ll go around in circles.’ The policeman looked at Harriman but Harriman’s face was blank. ‘I mean…’ said the policeman. ‘I mean. We want to get home, don’t we?’

Pike had gone white and his nose was bleeding. The front of his white shirt was a polka-dot pattern of blood. Pike stared at us, then down at his stains. I don’t think he believed he’d been hit until the mottled shirt-front confirmed it. He dabbed at the blood with a handkerchief and carefully removed his tie. He folded it and put it into his pocket. His face was smudged with blood and he was sniffing loudly in an effort to stop the bleeding.

‘Write,’ said the policeman. ‘Stop sniffing and start writing.’ He slapped the sheet of paper and left a tiny fingerprint of blood there. Pike took out his fountain pen and uncapped it, still sniffing, then he began to write in that crabby handwriting that doctors take six years to perfect.

‘Take Doctor Pike next door,’ Harriman said to the policeman.

I said, ‘And no more rough stuff.’

Pike rounded on me—he still thought I was a fellow prisoner—‘You look after yourself,’ he said angrily. ‘I don’t need people like you to protect me. I did what I did for America and for Latvia, the land of my father and of my wife.’ His nose began to bleed again.

‘Your nose is beginning to bleed again,’ I said. The policeman picked up the pen and paper and led Pike out of the room. The door closed. Harriman yawned and offered me a cigarette. ‘It will be all right, I think,’ Harriman said. ‘And Chico thinks you are a genius.’ He smiled to indicate that he
didn’t agree. ‘No matter what I say, he’s got it fixed in his head that you set light to Pike’s brother’s chimney pot.’