Billow (20 page)

A tinge of amusement crossed his face and he chuckled. "Are you sure you didn't bring back the wrong ondine, son?" Tristan stiffened. "Have a hard time believing this little slip of a girl is supposed to end this war."

Hands curled into fists.

"There's absolutely no question she'll be the one to save us all." Tristan's voice cut through the air.

But I barely heard what he said because I couldn't get over how his father treated him.

When the king shot me a skeptical look, my blood began to boil.

Who the hell did this guy think he was? After everything Tristan sacrificed and did for his kingdom, he spoke about him like he was a second-best idiot son.

"Look —"

"King Belicoux, I understand you're working on hosting the Elemental conference this spring." Julian smoothly prevented the diplomatic incident I was about to cause. Fingers circled my wrist, reminding me to keep my mouth shut. "How are plans progressing?"

Tristan stared at where Julian touched me, expression blank as a stone wall. I pulled my arm away, but he'd already headed back to the front.

"Another one of my son's unorthodox ideas." King Belicoux walked after Tristan and Julian followed. "But it looks like it will happen…"

I stood there, simply watching the play between chevaliers and gardinels. A group of knights and warriors enjoying a brief moment of relaxation in a war that never ended.

I felt so removed from all of it.

He has a kingdom to lead. A life very different from ours.

I'd known that since the beginning and I'd worked for six months on erasing him from the secret places within me.

So why didn't the pain in my chest go away?

Tristan turned to say something to his father and I was struck by how similar their profiles looked.

The room narrowed and the atmosphere grew stifling. Suffocating.

Familiar anxiety swirled in the pit of my stomach. I had to get fresh air before another attack hit.

Keeping my breathing steady, I grabbed my coat and slipped out the back.

SIXTEEN

I focused on the cold air inflating and deflating my lungs.

The edge of tension slowly subsided and I walked across the covered patio. During the summer, people packed this section, enjoying the combination of warm weather and Stan's impeccable cooking.

With chairs and tables stacked to one side, the space now echoed with emptiness. A floodlight automatically turned on, illuminating the area with a dim glow.

I grabbed a chair and brought it to the edge of the deck. Settling into the plastic seat, I stared at the cars in the parking lot.

Everyone in there relied upon me to end this war. Every selkie in there depended on Tristan's leadership to guide their futures. Their families' futures.

And I needed to get away from it.

The click of the back door interrupted the comforting solitude.

"Here you are." A small degree of uncertainty laced Julian's playful tone. "I thought you'd run off."

"I'll go back in soon."

I owed it to him to return. But not yet. I wanted a little more time to breathe.

Instead of going back to the restaurant, he approached. Warm scent wrapped around me, making him impossible to ignore.

"I don't mind staying here with you." His tone turned flirtatious.

"I want to be alone." It came out a bit harder than I intended. But I wasn't in the mood for his wiseass remarks.

"We could enjoy alone time together —"

That's it.

Enough with the innuendoes. Enough with the games.

I stood and faced him. "Why did you bring me here?"

He stilled.

Wind murmured, shifting under the weight of my question.

"Because I wanted to spend an evening with you."

I couldn't deal with the subtle longing in his voice.

Because it meant he wanted to make a statement to me. To Tristan.

It meant he wanted me to take him seriously.

He'd broken the rules.

He was supposed to be the guy I
didn't
take seriously. The person I grudgingly laughed with, the guy whose outrageous attentions I brushed aside as harmless.

I hated the sadness that trickled from him. Hated I couldn't do anything to change it. Hated he was doing this when everything in my life was already out of control.

He wasn't supposed to do this.

"Stop. Just stop."

"What?"

"All of this. Everything." My hands waved wildly. "Stop asking me to give you something I can't."

"Can't or won't?"

Julian followed his instincts and never questioned it. And now he'd decided he wanted something more from me. Decided to change the boundaries between us.

Dark anger churned in the pit of my stomach. He had no right.

"How many times do I have to say it? I'm not —"

"Stop putting me in a box," he said quietly.

Dark blue eyes were mesmerizing in their intensity.

"I'm not putting you —"

"Haverleau caged you. Bound you." He stepped forward, but this time I refused to step back. "And now you're doing the same to others. Locking them behind assumptions that make them easier to deal with. Don't do it with me."

The presumptuous tone was too much.

"You don't know me." My tone was dangerous. "Quit playing these games. Stop manipulating me for your own amusement."

Eyes turned to icy shards and he crossed his arms. "For someone who doesn't like people getting close to her, you sure don't have a problem interfering with others."

"What are you —"

"You know what I'm talking about." His voice was harder than I'd ever heard it. "Using your Virtue to pry into people's private feelings for your own purposes. Doing it to me, Chloe, everyone around you."

I was tired of everyone picking on how I used my magic.

It was my Virtue, my life. Not theirs.

If I'd been stronger and more in control, people would still be here.

"What do you know?" Disdain dripped off my voice. "You're just a Redavi playing at being a chevalier."

It was like I'd punched him. A sharp, deeply wounded look flickered through his eyes.

"What about your princely selkie? If royal boy is a warrior, that's fine. But if a Redavi does it, it's not good enough for you."

Anger swelled. "Stop sounding like the poor little rich boy, LeVeq."

He gave a harsh, mocking laugh. "For an Empath, you sure have a lousy read on people."

That hit something deep and it hurt.

"And for a guy who thinks he's such hot shit, you sure have a hard time getting someone interested."

It was a cheap shot and I knew it. There were a million other words I could've used. Countless other ways that didn't involve targeting the self-doubt I sensed in him.

But I wanted him to back off.

Night air whispered, its chill defining the lines between us. We glared at each other until his usual mask slid into place.

"Hey. You got it." He took a step back and raised his hands. "Point made."

He turned, shoulders and back rigid. The door opened and Tristan stepped out.

"I was just leaving, Your Highness. Happy Birthday." Julian clapped his arm. "She's all yours."

The door shut behind him and I struggled to get a handle on the uneasy anger.

Tristan approached. "Everything okay?"

"It's complicated."

"It always is." His calm, low voice rolled over me. Through me.

I returned to the plastic seat and closed my eyes. Maybe all of this was a bizarre nightmare I'd wake up from.

Tristan pulled out another chair and sat next to me. Even with my eyes shut, I felt the heat of his leg near my thigh.

Too close. Always too close.

"You came with Julian," he said softly.

I forced myself to meet his gaze. I couldn't read his expression. God, I was tempted to use my Virtue on him, but he'd immediately sense it.

And then I'd have to explain why I cared.

"Yeah, I…" How could I explain this mess? "I didn't know it was your birthday," I finished lamely. "I would've brought something."

His mouth curved. "This kind of thing makes me uncomfortable. The party was Garreth and Gabe's idea."

Which meant he wasn't in charge of who got invited. I decided not to question why that made me feel relieved.

"I'm sorry about my father."

"I usually open my mouth first before people dislike me," I half-joked.

Tristan winced. "He's not an easy man. It had nothing to do with you."

I wasn't so sure about that. It seemed mighty personal.

"For centuries, our race existed to protect and fight on behalf of elementals." He rubbed his face tiredly. "That's been our singular purpose for generations. With the arrival of the
sondaleur
, he's worried about our Kingdom."

"What does ending the war have to do with it?"

If anything, I thought they'd be pleased. The selkies wouldn't have to keep sacrificing the lives of their brothers, sons, and fathers.

Tristan leaned back, arm and shoulder brushing against mine. I shifted away.

"He's worried once the war is over, our race will have no meaning. We'll have nothing to fight against. It's a warrior's greatest fear." His tall frame dwarfed the chair. "And my father is a stubborn man."

I'd never considered what would happen when the war ended.

The practical changes alone were staggering. Would ondines need gardinels? Would selkies take other jobs and positions? What about the laws and rules that governed ondine communities?

What would happen to so many people whose purposes and lives were defined by the existence of the war itself?

Tristan was the selkie prince, which meant he had to deal with those challenges. When I fulfilled the prophecy, he'd have to find a way for his people to move forward.

The pain in my chest returned.

"You're taking over the throne soon. Congratulations."

"My father spoke out of line." His voice hardened slightly.

"But you're preparing for it." I ignored the sharp, poking ache. "Is that why you went back to your kingdom? To deal with that?"

He hesitated. "Yes. I've been making preparations for what's to come."

He has his job and you have yours.

With one hard shove, the pain settled behind the wall.

Eyes swept over my face. "Still having trouble sleeping?"

Self-conscious, I turned away. "The usual amount."

"You look tired."

"Yeah, well." Guess there was only so much concealer could do. "Nothing much I can do about it, Your Highness."

I didn't want to talk about the blackness. Not in the middle of the silent insulation nature provided.

Tristan sat beside me, but my solitude didn't feel interrupted. It was something I thought only happened at the cove.

But even next to a parking lot behind a restaurant filled with people, it felt like he and I were alone in the world.

Almost as if he'd effortlessly slipped inside my cocoon with me.

"Is Adrian okay?" I quickly asked. "He didn't look so hot earlier."

For a moment, I thought Tristan wasn't going to follow the change in subject.

"He's going through some things," he finally replied.

Adrian had a difficult time over the past few months. Prior to being assigned to Chloe, he'd been Miriam Moreaux's gardinel.

As an Aquidae, Miriam managed to remain undetected in Haverleau for two months. Chloe once mentioned Adrian blamed himself for not recognizing what happened.

Maybe his mood tonight had something to do with that. "Did Miriam's aura disappear after she became Aquidae?"

Tristan shook his head. "That's why we didn't realize she'd turned."

It was clear from the way he said it he thought Adrian wasn't at fault. None of the gardinels noticed anything different.

"Doesn't the Shadow's blood negate magic?"

"It doesn't quite work like that. Elementals carry magic in the water of their bodies. Two-thirds of it is contained within cells. The rest is highly concentrated in blood and other fluids."

Which meant even after the Shadow turned Miriam, magic still lingered in her body.

"Eventually, her aura would've disappeared," Tristan continued. "Her cells would've slowly died off the longer the Shadow's blood stayed within her. And the magic would've faded."

Aquidae were supposed to be a null. Something that cancelled elemental magic. But as Miriam proved, sometimes magic could outsmart everyone.

"Maybe that has something to do with the Aquidae that vanished," I murmured.

Tristan knew what I was talking about. "Magic."

"They could be manipulating or using it in some way."

It was a plausible explanation for why my Virtue sensed it disappear.

But what kind of magic? How?

"It gives us something to work with." He paused. "I'll discuss it with the others tomorrow."

I suddenly realized Tristan was the first person who didn't question what I'd felt in the Trident. He took my word that Empath sensed an Aquidae vanish.

I believe you
.

Drops of warmth spread and I let it flow.

Just for tonight.

I was strong enough to shut him out. But for now, I'd enjoy the soothing quiet with him.

He stretched his long legs and his thigh rested against my knee. This time, I didn't move away.

"Shouldn't you go back in? It's your party."

"They're having too much fun to notice I'm gone," he said dryly. "My father got half the guests involved in a selkie drinking game. The rest of them were scaring Gabe with horror stories about being a dad."

A tiny baby cradled in my uncle's muscular arms. I couldn't wait to see that sight.

"They asked me to name their child."

It was the first time I said it aloud.

Dark eyes studied me. "Quite an honor."

It was. And I wasn't going to pick a horrible name for my cousin. Kids on the playground could be mean.