Blindsided - A Stepbrother Romance Novel (20 page)

Shawn sat down at the table and looked at Beau again before taking a bite of his toast. “As good as ever, I guess. The old man went after his mom last night and Beau stepped in. He said the old man wouldn’t hit him though and he just kept going after his mom. You know the old man loves beating on him. It must be a new kind of torture now that Beau is finally starting to fight back. Anyways, Beau finally punched him in the gut and he backed off and eventually passed out. Later on Beau went to sleep and woke up sometime after midnight to the sounds of his mom screaming and the bedroom door locked. He couldn’t get in and he thought the old man was killing his mother so he called the cops.”

Conrad raised an eyebrow. Beau never called the cops. They were one of those families that didn’t involve outsiders in what they referred to as
family matters.
“So did they arrest his father?”

Shawn snorted and said, “When they got there his mom told them it was just a misunderstanding and she wouldn’t press charges. Her face was all busted up so the cop told her it wasn’t her call. While they were hooking up the old man mom turned her venom on Beau. She told him he was the problem, the reason his father drank and was pissed off all the time. She called him a loser and told him she wished that she’d never had him.” Shawn shook his head. He was raised by a single mother who devoted her life to what he needed. Conrad knew that he couldn’t imagine any mother not wanting to protect her son.

With a sigh Conrad said, “Fuck, what the hell is wrong with people?”

“I have no idea,” Shawn said. “I just wish the crazy ones would stop having kids.”

“Yeah, me too. Speaking of being raised by crazy people, I’m surprised Casey isn’t here. It seems like she’s been around almost every time Beau is lately.”

Shawn nodded. “She worked until closing at the bar this morning. She text him while we were still up around four, I think. Those two are getting awfully close.”

“Yeah, I’m afraid the way Casey cares about him is not exactly the same as the way he’s looking at her,” Conrad said. He suddenly had a headache as he wondered what kind of problems that would cause for Beau in the future. Sometimes it was all too much. He finished what was in his cup and then said, “Why are you up so early if you stayed up with him until four?”

“I have a breakfast date with my mom,” he said.

Conrad smiled. “Then why are you eating toast?”

“Because when she takes me out to breakfast she insists on paying. I don’t like to go in too hungry.”

Laughing, Conrad said, “Jesus we’re all a mess, aren’t we?”

“Yep.”

**

Conrad was secretly relieved when he got to Luke’s and saw that Sam’s Mustang was gone. The idea of seeing her always thrilled him, but the idea of looking her in the eye after yesterday made him slightly nauseated. The last thing he wanted was for her to think he was messing with her head. It’s just so damned hard to be around her and keep his hands and lips to himself. If he could kick himself in the ass for crossing that line…again, he would. For now he was doing it mentally and adding it to the list of things he’d screwed up in his life over the past five years.

He let himself in the back door and found Aaron having breakfast in the kitchen. The thrilled look on the teenager’s face when he saw Conrad erased any doubts he had about following through with his promise. “Hey Aaron, where’s Luke?”

“Hey,” Aaron said with a grin. His smile fell though as he said, “Sammy tried to get him up for breakfast before she left for work but he was too tired. She told me to let him sleep.”

Conrad pulled his brows together. In the three years that he’d known Luke he’d never known him to sleep past seven a.m. Most days he was up by five whether he had work or not. The chemotherapy must be getting to him already. “I’m gonna look in on him and then I’ll be ready if you are,” he told Aaron.

Aaron grinned. “I’m ready.”

Conrad couldn’t help but smile at the boy’s enthusiasm. He left him there and went down the hall to Luke’s room. The door was open a crack but it was dark inside. He pushed it in gently and after his eyes adjusted to the darkness he could make out Luke’s form in the bed. He was lying on his side with his back to the door. He didn’t have a shirt on and Conrad noticed that he could almost count Luke’s ribs from across the room. He hadn’t noticed how much weight he lost and he wondered if it was the clothes Luke wore or if he’d just been that self-involved.

“Hey Luke,” he said in a loud whisper, not wanting to wake him if he’d gone back to sleep.

Luke stirred and groaned as he turned towards the door. Conrad saw him squint. “Yeah?”

“It’s Conrad. I’m sorry to bother you I just wanted to see if you needed anything before Aaron and I took off.”

Luke’s voice sounded strained as he said, “No, I’m good. You boys have fun.”

“You want me to bring you some breakfast?”

Luke grimaced. “No, thank you. My stomach is a little queasy this morning. Sam tried to force me to eat. That girl is as stubborn as a mule.”

Conrad chuckled. “I’m finding that out,” he said. “Luke, can I ask you a question?”

“Sure,” he pushed himself up against the headboard. “Come on in here where I can hear you better.”

Conrad moved into the room. When he got close to Luke he could see how pale he was and there was a slight sheen of sweat across his forehead although it wasn’t hot in the room at all. “You know what, it’s not important. I’ll let you go back to resting. I’m sorry I bothered you.”

“Knock that off. I know I look like shit. I feel like shit too. But none of that changes the fact that I still want to be a part of this family for as long as I can. Tell me what’s on your mind.”

Conrad breathed in a long, slow breath before saying, “It’s Sam.” Luke didn’t look surprised and he didn’t say anything. He waited for Conrad to go on. “Before I knew that she was your daughter, we were getting kind of close. I really liked her.”

“You don’t like her anymore now that you know she’s my kid?” Luke was smiling and Conrad knew him well enough to know he was trying to lighten the mood.

“No, that’s not it. I still like her. I just…shit, this is hard. I like her too much if you know what I mean.”

“Does she like you the way you like her?”

“I think so.”

“Then I’m not sure I’m getting the problem. You’re both adults and both single as far as I know.”

“She’s my step-sister.”

Luke chuckled. “Is that what the problem is?”

“It just feels…creepy.”

“Being with her feels creepy, or the idea of being with your step-sister?”

“Definitely not being with her. I enjoy her company…a lot. It’s the idea of it. You know I’ve never really been in a relationship, and I’ve never really wanted to be. But from the moment I met Sam I knew that the way I felt about her was different. I was already thinking about exploring that when I found out that you were her father. I guess it almost feels like karma.”

“Karma? You mean part of your punishment for your imaginary crimes?”

“I left Jake alone, Luke. I left him alone to die.”

“You left an eighteen year old young man downstairs in the same house you were in. If you had dropped him off there and left, what happened to him still wouldn’t be your fault. He was a legal adult. He made his own decision to take those pills. The outcome was horrible and tragic, but it was in no way your fault. And I’ve told you before; your mother’s death was not your fault either. She was depressed. She was devastated by the loss and she never got over it, but if Jake’s death was not your fault…and it wasn’t, then her death was not your fault either. So, long story short, karma has no reason to be out to get you. You cannot let what happened in your past leave a permanent stain on your future. Take it from a guy who knows from experience that you don’t always have the kind of time you think you do. Sometimes people you care about are taken away way too soon or you have to go yourself. Time is too precious to waste on a past that you can’t change. You miss the present and put a damper on the future.”

“You’re pretty smart for an old guy,” Conrad told him with a smile.

“I know. Now, go away and let this old guy get some rest.”

Conrad put his hand on Luke’s shoulder. “Okay, but you’re sure you don’t need anything before I go?”

“Not a thing. Thank you for taking Aaron.”

“No problem.” Conrad started to leave as Luke was getting comfortable again. That was when he noticed the clump of brown hair lying against the white sheet next to the pillow. Luke’s hair was falling out. He felt a lump in his throat and had to propel himself out the door before the tears welling up hit his eyes. Although he knew what was happening to Luke, the reality of his step-father’s situation hadn’t really hit him until that very moment, and it sucked…badly.

Sam showed up for the race Saturday night slightly less enthusiastic than she normally was. Shawn had called her earlier in the week and she was excited about being there right up until the time tonight when it dawned on her she’d have to look Conrad in the eyes. She hadn’t seen him since Thursday afternoon. If she’ hadn’t had to ride home with him from Malibu that day she wouldn’t have. After he kissed her he got all weird and distant again. The hour and fifteen minute drive back to her car at the shop was silent and uncomfortable and the more her thoughts were allowed to stew the more pissed off she’d gotten at him. He couldn’t seem to make up his mind what he wanted, but instead of figuring it out on his own, he was sucking her into that chaos.

On Friday afternoon she’d gotten a call from Drew. They were all meeting at the Island that evening and Drew asked if she wanted to go. Sam told her she shouldn’t leave Luke. It was an excuse, but not really a lie. Luke hadn’t been doing well. He never got out of bed on Friday and by Friday night he was looking sallow and weaker than ever. She’d spent her Friday night watching him sleep or arguing with him about going to the doctor when he was awake. Saturday wasn’t much better and she’d almost passed on the race before Aaron volunteered to stay and keep an eye on Luke. She was reluctant to leave them but Aaron reminded her once again that he wasn’t five. She knew she had to start trusting him and letting him grow up or he’d just keep pushing and doing dangerous things to prove to her that she wasn’t in control of his life. Reluctantly she left the house, but driving elevated her mood, as usual and by the time she got to the race site she’d almost convinced herself that Conrad’s inability to get his shit together and figure out what he wanted or didn’t want was not her problem. She saw him as soon as she drove up and wished that her stomach didn’t do somersaults every time she looked at him. It didn’t matter how pissed off she was at him, she still wanted him and that made her angry with herself. The feelings were all so new…and so very raw.

She parked the Mustang and sucked in a deep breath before walking over to where he and Shawn and Beau stood looking under the hood of Beau’s car. “Hey guys, are you racing tonight, Beau?” He looked at Sam and she had to consciously make herself not wince when she saw his face. The bruises were old, but it still pained her to look at them.

“Yeah, she’s ready,” he said, patting his car. Sam could feel Conrad looking at her but she looked at Shawn instead.

“What about you, are you racing tonight?”

“Nah, my car still needs work and Conrad won’t let me drive the Charger.” Sam was forced to look at Conrad then and at least acknowledge him. As soon as she saw his face her body relived everything she’d felt in that kiss and she couldn’t even force a smile. Instead she said,

“Thank you for taking Aaron to the driving school yesterday.”

“I enjoyed it. He was excited even though he didn’t get to do anything but fill out paperwork today.” He smiled and Sam cursed herself again for what that did to her. “Where is he? I’m surprised he let you get away without him tonight.”

Her mood plummeted at the reminder. She stepped closer to him so that only the two of them could hear. The nearness of his body and the subtle smell of his cologne sent an electrical charge through her body in spite of what she needed to tell him. “He volunteered to stay with Luke. I wasn’t going to come. I didn’t want to leave him alone.”

He put his hand on her arm and led her further away. The touch sent shocks racing through her. He let go when they were alone and said, “Why, what’s wrong?”

“I’m not sure. I wanted to take him to the ER but he wouldn’t go. Damned stubborn…Anyways, he looks yellow to me, jaundiced. I looked it up and from what I read there could be a problem with his gall bladder or his liver. Since he wouldn’t go to the ER I was going to stay home with him tonight. I haven’t wanted to leave him alone. Even Aaron was worried about him, but he promised me he wouldn’t leave him alone and he’d call me if there was any change or he needed anything.”

“Shit. The nurses at the infusion center tell him all the time to call or go to the ER if there are any big changes.”

“I know, believe me, we argued about it all day. I even threatened to call an ambulance but he said he’d just refuse to go with them. He thinks it can just wait until Monday.”

“You think it can wait until Monday?”

“I don’t know. I’ m not a nurse. From what I read online, he shouldn’t wait. But, I don’t know how to change his mind.”