Blissfully Undone (7 page)

Jenny was suddenly plagued with second thoughts about exposing the truth of their affair. She became even more uncertain when Dan hesitantly put an arm around her best friend and said, “We’re fine.”

Kelly buried her face in his chest. “I’m so relieved!”

Her quiet sobbing consumed Jenny with guilt. How could she have done this to Kelly? There was no way her best friend could ever forgive her for this.

Ryan finally released Jenny from his constricting but loving embrace. “We’ve been trying to reach you guys since Friday. It’s been hell waiting out the storm.” He brushed Jenny’s midnight hair away from her face. “All I could think of was you freezing up here in the cabin, but I should have known better with that Cherokee blood running in your veins. You’re a survivor through and through.” Ryan kissed her on the lips, but Jenny couldn’t return the kiss. He cocked his head, his emerald eyes filled with renewed concern. “What’s wrong, Jen?”

She looked back over at Dan, unsure if she should say something.

Dan cleared his throat. “Kelly. Ryan. There is something you should know.”

Kelly stared at him, then turned and glared. Her look of hatred burned into Jenny’s soul. “How… could… you!” she howled.

Ryan was still clueless, his worry overshadowing his normally sharp deductive skills. “How could she what?”

Dan spoke up. “Ryan, we’re in love. It wasn’t planned, it just happened.”

Ryan shook his head. “What the…”

“You fucking bitch!” Kelly screeched, lunging at her. Dan stood in the way to prevent any contact from being made.

Jenny cringed and backed away from her now ex-best friend. She understood this was the price she had to pay for loving Dan and she found it hurt too much. “Kelly, I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry!”

“Don’t give me that shit. You are my best friend, Jenny. No. You
were
my best friend!” Kelly turned back on Dan and started hitting him viciously on the chest. “You motherfucker! How could you do this to me?” Dan stood there and took her blows without defending himself. It appeared he was taking her punishment gratefully, as if he wanted Kelly to hit him.

Ryan did not react the same way. He looked at Jenny with tears in his eyes. “It was a stupid fling. This was all a mistake. I don’t believe for a second that you love him. Let me take you home and we can work this out.” Jenny had expected him to fly off the handle; instead, he was trying to fix it. It was one of Ryan’s most endearing qualities.

“Oh, Rye,” she whimpered. She looked at the love reflected in his eyes and felt a wave of regret. He took her hand and led her out of the cabin towards his car. Jenny resisted at first, but part of her wanted to run away from the painful encounter.

“Don’t,” Dan called out. She looked back, drawn to him like a magnet. His blond hair covered his eyes, but he didn’t sweep it back as he waited for her decision. “Don’t leave me, Jenny.” Her heart contracted. Although her love for him was new, it was intense—unlike anything she’d felt before. Jenny stopped in her tracks, ready to fight for him… until she looked into the eyes of her best friend.

The hate radiating from Kelly was palpable. “Get out of here, bitch!” she snarled. Jenny could see the severe pain her actions had caused etched in Kelly’s face and it shattered her resolve to stay.

Ryan pulled on her arm. She looked one last time at Dan, tears welling up in her eyes. She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t hurt them any more than she already had. Jenny reluctantly followed Ryan out of the cabin and out of Dan’s life.

This love was doomed from the start…
Jenny thought, as she stared out the window of the car while they drove away. Smoke drifted up out of the chimney, beckoning her to come back—to revel in the warmth she had enjoyed alone in the snowbound cabin with Dan.

Ryan pulled Jenny out of her daze with a pointed question. “I have to know. Did you really fuck Dan?”

As bad as it was, she was determined not to make it worse by lying. “We did everything
but
traditional fucking.”

Ryan turned his head towards her with a raised eyebrow. “You kept your pussy away from him?”

She blushed. How much was too much information? She added softly, “He took me anally, Rye.”

Jenny didn’t miss the shudder when he replied, “Dan did you that way? I guess when you’re desperate…”

She ignored the feeling of rejection his shudder wrought. Ryan was grossed-out by massaging her feet, so the idea of taking her anally was way beyond his comfort level. It would have been easy to let him think it ended there, but he deserved to know the whole truth.

“Ryan, I was going to make love to him today.”

“But you didn’t,” he said, slamming his hands down on the steering wheel, “because I came and rescued you in time.”

“Ryan…”

“No, this was just a set of unfortunate circumstances. You do not love Dan.
We
are more important than five days spent in a cabin.”

She leaned against the window. In typical Ryan fashion, he’d already found a logical way to handle the situation. It was simply a mistake; it was not going to change their relationship. She sighed.

Until she knew what was happening between Kelly and Dan, this was the easiest route to take. If those two stayed together, there was no point in breaking up with Ryan. Even though he didn’t compare to Dan, he was a good guy.

Better than I deserve.

When Ryan arrived at their apartment, he took her by the hand and led her inside. She was hesitant to enter, suddenly feeling queasy.

He smiled at her. “I am glad to have you back home where you belong. I have missed you, Jenny Boo.” His use of her college nickname softened her heart. He’d given it to her at a Halloween party shortly after they met. Ryan grazed his hand against her cheek lovingly. He made it easy to slip back into the way things were. Maybe he was right; a string of chance circumstances had ignited an unusual situation. In the real world, the love affair would never have happened.

The two spent a quiet evening together. Ryan cooked a simple meal and kept the conversation light. When it came time for bed, he started undressing and said huskily, “I want to be close to you tonight.” Jenny felt she owed it to Ryan and began stripping off her clothes. It would ease the guilt of being unfaithful.

Ryan pulled her to him, kissing her firmly on the lips. “
My
Jenny,” he growled as he kissed her neck and cradled her breasts in both hands. He worshipped her breasts. Jenny threw her head back and let him suckle them. It was one thing that Ryan really dug and she appreciated his attention.

Sadly, the way he handled foreplay reminded her of a business transaction. It was quick and to the point, never lasting long enough. Soon he was pushing her against the bed with his body weight. She fell back onto it, giving into his need—wanting to feel connected to him again,
needing
to feel that this was the right thing for her.

Ryan thrust his hard shaft into her without any undue ceremony. He grabbed her hips and began stroking her with his lengthy cock. “I love you, Jenny. Nothing else matters.” He was staking his claim after the affair. She instinctually understood that this was his way of preserving his manhood. She opened herself to him and allowed Ryan deep inside.

He fucked her for literally an hour. She was tempted to play with her clit to help herself orgasm, but doing something new would only highlight the fact she had been with another man. She resisted the urge, letting Ryan have his way with her body. She could tell he was proud of himself for lasting so long, but the reality of it was that her insides were sore by the time he finally grunted out his climax.

“This… is… for… you!” he cried, as his dick rammed into her forcefully to finish off the session.

She echoed his cry in a pretend orgasm. “Oh, Rye, yes, yes!” She knew he wouldn’t be satisfied unless he pleased her and, after an hour, all she wanted was rest. She curled up in a ball afterwards with tears in her eyes. This was what she had signed up for—a good man and minimal pleasure. Until Dan, she hadn’t realized it could be any other way.

The next morning she tried to contact him from her office. Dan didn’t answer his cell or his work phone. She called throughout the day, but it appeared he had cut off all contact from her. After a week of trying to reach him, she finally gave up. Either Kelly had instructed him not to have anything to do with her or Dan hadn’t forgiven her for leaving him behind.

The unresolved feelings she had for the man haunted her constantly. She tried to continue forward with Ryan, but everything felt different. She still loved Rye, but Jenny realized that she had never been
in love
with him.

She was completely and utterly in love with Dan. Just thinking about him gave her butterflies. She longed to hear his deep voice, to feel his warm caresses, to smell his musky scent. Everything about him was desirable and perfect. To be away from that, to be forced to live life without his presence was like a partial death. She knew she would never be whole again.

****

After another quiet dinner together, Ryan gave her a sympathetic look. “What’s wrong, Boo?”

She had been thinking of Dan and glanced at him, her cheeks burning red with guilt. “Nothing.”

“Don’t tell me
nothing
. I can see it in your eyes. You’re clearly suffering.”

“It’s not important.”

“I disagree. It’s important if it is causing you pain.”

Jenny sighed heavily, not able to look him in the eye when she answered. “You don’t want to hear my thoughts, trust me.”

He put his fork down. “Are you thinking of Dan?”

Tears came to her eyes when she whispered, “Yes.”

“I talked to him today,” Ryan announced as he got up from the table and cleared away the dishes. Jenny tried to hide her interest, but he saw right through her and added, “Yes, Dan seems to be as miserable as you are.”

“Oh,” she murmured, both happy and upset to hear that he was suffering as well.

“Kelly dumped him that day at the cabin. He’s been staying with a coworker while he tries to find a place, but you know how that is. Cheap apartments are impossible to come by in this city, especially on short notice.”

Jenny gazed intensely at Ryan, trying to read between the lines. Why was he telling her this? What was his hidden agenda? “I agree. Finding a place won’t be easy for him,” she responded guardedly.

He stared at her without speaking. It appeared he was trying to build the courage to say something important. She waited patiently while he scraped the plates, and then washed his hands before returning to the table. “Boo, you should know that I told Dan not to contact you.”

Jenny felt a surge of anger, immediately followed by a wave of guilt. Of course he had the right to do that. She’d cheated on him. Jenny would do no less if it were the other way around.

He continued, “I must admit, I appreciate the fact Dan has honored my request.” Jenny nodded her head, unsure what he expected her to say.

Ryan took her hand and held it in his. “I want you to be happy, Jen. I don’t like seeing you like this.” She was moved by the love expressed in his luminous green eyes. He was the opposite of Dan in his features. He had short dark brown curls, emeralds for eyes, and a lean build. There was no doubt that Ryan loved her and she still loved him—even if it wasn’t the “fireworks” kind of love she felt for Dan.

Ryan kissed the back of her hand tenderly and said, “Don’t give up on me yet.”

Jenny gave him a weak smile. “You have been so understanding, Rye. I don’t deserve it.”

“I would disagree,” he answered.

Why did Ryan have to be so sweet? It actually hurt her heart that he was being so kind.

“I love you, Jenny. More than you know.” He leaned over and kissed her lightly on the lips.

She went to bed that night thinking about Dan. Knowing that he wanted to be with her was pure torture. Still, Jenny couldn’t leave Ryan. The simple truth was that she loved him enough to keep trying.

Ryan’s Gift

Ryan shocked Jenny when he called her at work the next day and told her to meet him at the Oxford hotel at six. He was a self-professed workaholic. Late nights at the office were common, but leaving at a reasonable hour on a weekday was
not
. As if he could read her thoughts, he said, “I want to change things up a little, Jen. I’m determined to see that beautiful smile on your face tonight. Let’s meet in the lobby. I have a special surprise for you.”