Authors: Juanita Jane Foshee
Afterwards, Lamont pulled the sheet over them. He was still a little reluctant to let Barbara see him. She laid her head on his shoulder and fell asleep.
When morning came, Lamont woke first. He looked over at his wife. She was sleeping. He got up, dressed, and went to the kitchen. He decided he would cook breakfast for them. He was setting the table when Barbara sleepily came into the kitchen. She yawned, “Why didn’t you call me?” Lamont said, “I decided to be a good husband and cook breakfast.” He grinned as he buttered the toast, “I’m a pretty good cook when it comes to toast, bacon, and scrambled eggs. Sit down, I’ve got it ready.” Barbara said, “I’m sorry darling, I just want coffee. You know what champagne does to me.” He poured the coffee and began to eat. “Are you sure you didn’t get too much loving?” She looked at his plate with three slices of toast, six slices of bacon, and a double handful of eggs, “I see you didn’t get too much loving.” Lamont grinned, “All it does for me is make me hungry” Barbara said, “For your information Monty Ellman, I can take just as much loving as you can.” He winked at her and chuckled, “I’ve got my doubts about that.”
She washed the dishes while he went to the stables to feed. She got done and went to the stables. He was just finishing up when she got there. She said, “I was going to help you.” He said, “You can tonight when I feed.” Barbara looked at Robbie’s horse, “Robbie is really crazy about him.” Lamont said, “He’s really too big for Robbie right now but in another year he won’t be.” He looked at Barbara, “No bra?” She grinned, “You said we were gonna make love all weekend.” He reached out and slowly pulled her to him, “Let’s do it here.” She asked, “Where?” He answered, “On that pile of hay. It’s a good bed.” Barbara laughed, “Monty we’re crazy.” He said, “So let’s be crazy.”
The doors were shut and the heated stable was warm. He helped her up the ladder where most of the hay was. Barbara giggled, “I feel like a school girl with a boyfriend hiding from my parents.” She undressed quickly, so did Lamont until he got down to his briefs. He hesitated for a second but then he let them fall. When she touched him as she did in California, he moaned with a hot passion inside him. Their fulfillment was so great and wonderful, they were silent and exhausted on the hay. Finally Barbara said, “I think I like the hay better than the bed.” He looked at her and burst out laughing, “I feel like I’m eighteen again.” She said, “You know, I do too.” Barbara suggested, “Let’s ride up to the big cave today.” He said, “That’s about ten miles. It will be cold up there.” She said, “I don’t care. We can take blankets or the sleeping bags.” He gave her a quick hug, “Okay.” They dressed and Barbara said, “I’ll go pack us some food while you saddle the horses.”
As she came out of the first stable, she heard a car. When it topped the hill, she could see it was a taxi. Barbara went back in the stable, “Monty someone is coming in a taxi.” He took Barbara’s hand, “Let’s go see who it is.”
The taxi stopped in front of the house. A woman got out and paid the driver. When she turned towards the house, Lamont and Barbara saw it was Natalie. She looked at least seven months pregnant. Lamont said as they walked towards her, “What in the hell is she doing here?” Barbara said, “Maybe she is visiting Dave and doesn’t know they aren’t here. It’s been a long time since Dave has seen her.”
After taking a few steps towards the house she saw Barbara and Lamont walking towards her. When they got close enough Lamont said, “What in the hell are you doing here?” Natalie smiled, “Hello Barbara, Monty.” He asked again, “What do you want?” Natalie’s face got very serious, “I’m here on business. I have to talk to you Monty”
Even though Natalie was thirty three years old, she still looked much younger. She would pass for a woman of twenty. Her hair was pulled back with a ribbon and she had very little makeup on. Her pretty face was still lovely to look at. Even Barbara had to admit she was a very pretty pregnant woman. Barbara said, “I’ll go and leave you alone.” Lamont said firmly, “You stay. What she has to say to me she can say it to you too.” Barbara suggested, “Shouldn’t we go inside? It’s cold out here.” Lamont motioned for them to go in. Barbara could see Lamont was angry.
When they were inside Natalie said, “I won’t be here long.” Barbara asked her to sit down. She looked very tired. Natalie said politely, “Thank you.” Lamont said, “Alright Natalie, say what you came to say. Then I’ll take you back to town.” Natalie looked down at her purse. Barbara said, “I think this should be just between you two. Excuse me.” Lamont said, “You don’t have to go.” Barbara said, “I’d rather go darling.”
When she was gone, Lamont looked straight at Natalie, “What do you want?” Natalie said, “Monty, I know you hate me. I don’t blame you.” Lamont sighed, “Skip all that and get to the point.” Natalie said, “I guess Dave told you of Dad’s serious heart condition?” Lamont answered, “Yes he told me. I’m sorry.” Natalie asked, “Did Dave tell you about—Jimmy? My seven year old son?” Lamont said, “Yes, he told me about a year ago. That’s one plan you had that backfired on you.” She sighed, “So Dave told you that’s why I came that Christmas? I admit I wanted you to sleep with me so you’d think Jimmy was yours. I know that was a dirty thing to try to do but I was out of my mind not knowing what to do.” Lamont said, “No Dave didn’t tell me that. I just put two and two together. Just because you made a damn fool out of me once is no sign you could do it again.” Natalie begged, “Please Monty. I don’t want to argue with you. I didn’t come all this far to argue with you. Lord knows there is enough of that at home.” Lamont said, “Then why did you come?” Natalie said, “Like I said, Dad is very sick. He’s the only one in the family who cares for Jimmy. Dave has two children and another on the way. I have no one to turn to except you. Monty I’m going to ask you a very special favor. I promise I will never bother you again. This favor is really for my son, not for me.” Lamont said, “Your promises mean nothing.” Natalie said, “Believe me this time. I’m going back home tonight on the midnight flight. No one knows where I am. Monty, I love my son more than anything or anyone on earth. Two months ago, I developed a serious heart condition. So bad the doctor wanted me to have an abortion but I wouldn’t let him. I couldn’t bring myself to let my unborn child be killed.” Tears were in her eyes. Lamont’s face lost it’s anger. Natalie continued, “I’ve almost went crazy since he told me. Not for myself but for Jimmy. If I die, my unborn baby will be taken care of by my husband’s parents. I’m not worried about that. I just don’t know what will happen to Jimmy. My husband doesn’t have anything to do with him. He lives with us but, if anything happens to me or Dad, he has no one. You know mother, she dislikes Jimmy very much and the child knows it. Della and Porter are too old to take care of him.” She dried her eyes and looked up at Lamont until their eyes met, “Monty, would you take Jimmy? Adopt him? I know in time you would love him and he would have a good home.” Lamont was so surprised he just looked at her. Natalie said, “It’s not for me Monty. It’s for a seven year old boy. I brought papers that my lawyer drew up for you to sign. If I die, you will be his adopted father. You don’t have to give him the Ellman name. He goes by Agar. My husband wouldn’t give him his name. I’m asking you not to judge my son by me. Please Monty, would you take him if I die?” Finally he said, “I’ll have to talk to Barbara. I’ll also have to think about this.” Natalie said, “I understand, but please come to a decision before I leave. My lawyer said these papers had to be signed before I go to the hospital to have my baby. My baby is due in January. I can’t make another trip here.” Lamont almost felt sorry for Natalie, “You can stay until time for your flight.” Barbara looked up at them when they came into the den where Barbara was making coffee. Lamont said, “Come here Barb.” Natalie sat down on a chair near the fireplace. Lamont sat down beside Barbara. Lamont said, “Let me see the papers your lawyer drew up.” Natalie opened her purse and handed them to him. They were quiet while Lamont read the papers carefully. Barbara didn’t know what all of this was about but she knew Lamont would tell her in due time. Lamont looked at Barbara and explained what the papers were about. Then he said, ‘You have a say so in this too honey. If I adopt him, he would be your son too. He would also take the Ellman name. That’s the only way I would take him.” Barbara said, “Let’s have a cup of coffee before any decision is made.”
It had began to snow. Then, as they drank coffee a flash of news came over the radio. All flights had been canceled for at least twelve hours. A snow blizzard was on it’s way. Barbara said, “You must stay here Natalie.” Natalie said, “No, I’d rather not. If Monty will drive me to town, I can get a motel room.” Lamont said, “No need for that. You can stay here.”
When Lamont went to the stables to see if they were warm enough Natalie said, “Thank you Barbara for being so kind to me.” Barbara said, “I’ve been very jealous of you Natalie because you had Monty first and he did love you.” Natalie said, “Don’t be Barbara. Our life together was over long before we even separated. Monty doesn’t love me anymore. What love he had for me, I killed long ago. I will say this, I was very foolish. I know that now.” Barbara said, “You did have a part of Monty I can never have. You had his younger years before the war.” Natalie said, “Yes but you have him now. Don’t ever make the mistake I did. Monty is a wonderful man. He’s the best thing that ever happened to me. I just didn’t have the sense to realize it.”
Natalie looked around, “You’ve made this house a warm home. Just as Monty always wanted it to be. I didn’t like the house. In fact, I didn’t like anything here. I was just a very spoiled person and Monty wouldn’t give in to me. When I look back on those years, I can see how I’ve wasted my life. I had everything. Perhaps too much. When I met Monty, he was a challenge to me. It took me five years to get him to marry me. He wasn’t like Ralph, my sister’s husband. The only reason their marriage has lasted is because he does everything she wants him to. He had to even pay her to get pregnant. Us Agars are really some family. My father and Dave are the only nice ones in the whole family.” Barbara asked, “Aren’t you happy with your husband?” Natalie said, “No, we weren’t in love. He’s a lawyer and marrying me gave him a better recognition for his trade. I married him because I wanted Jimmy to have a father and a home like other children. It took only two weeks after we were married to find out he wouldn’t be a father to Jimmy. I left him and went home and that was pure hell. My mother approved of my husband so I decided living with him wasn’t as bad as living at home with her. When I got pregnant, he sure had a fit. He just doesn’t like children. His parents are fine people. If I die, they will take the baby. I’ve already had that fixed.” Barbara said, “You speak of dying like you’re going on a trip or a visit.” Natalie said with a slight smile, “I don’t really mind dying. If Monty and you will take Jimmy, I think I will welcome death.” Barbara said, “You don’t mean that.” Natalie said, “Oh yes I do. I know it’s hard for you to believe me but I do love Monty. I always have. I’ve made such a mess of my life—there’s nothing left. I can’t even give Jimmy the home he needs.” Barbara asked, “Doesn’t he know you love him?” Natalie answered, “Yes, he knows and he loves me but he’s a very unhappy little boy. Please Barbara, get Monty to sign the papers.” Barbara said, “I can’t say anything to him. It has to be his decision. I will say this, and I promise you this, if we sign the papers and we do take the boy, I will do my best to be a mother to him. I will do everything in my power to win his respect and love.” Tears were on Natalie’s face, “Thank you Barbara.”
Lamont came into the room, “Man it is really snowing now.”
All evening the conversation was strained and discomforting. When Barbara showed Natalie the room she would sleep in, Natalie went to bed early.
In their bedroom, Lamont sat down on the big chair near the bed. He was very quiet. Barbara knew he was thinking all this out. He had a big decision to make. A young boy’s future depended on what he decided. Lamont knew his health wasn’t extra good, but he did have money in the bank and this ranch. He had enough money to send his own son and another through college with some to spare. What if the fever got him before Jimmy was a grown man? Could Barbara love him knowing whose son he was? In fact, Lamont wondered if he could love the boy like he should. Could he be a real father to him? He had to be sure before he signed the papers. The boy is unloved enough now. Jimmy is seven. Lamont wished he was younger. A seven year old boy could be hard to conquer. He could be hard to reach. Then another thought entered his mind, could this be some kind of trick Natalie was pulling? She was full of tricks and was capable of doing most anything if it’s in her favor. Natalie was always good at winning anyone’s sympathy and pity with her delicate, sweet face.
Barbara came from the bathroom. She was surprised Lamont was still sitting on the chair and hadn’t undressed. She put her arm around his shoulder and said “Darling, it’s bedtime.” Lamont asked, “Do you suppose Natalie is up to something? You know she’s good a dropping in on me once in a while just to stir up my life. The last time she cam here, she was pregnant with this boy and was trying to get me to sleep with her so I would think the child was mine.” Barbara sighed, “Of course, you know her better than me.” Lamont said, “Nobody really knows Natalie.” Barbara said, “Well, I do know people. I don’t believe she’s that good of an actress. She cried real tears and for some reason, I do believe her.” Lamont said “She can cry real tears and she can be so very sweet. She should have been an actress. I checked and double checked the papers. They are alright.” Barbara said, “Monty, Natalie loves this boy very much. I’m a mother. I can see the love on her face when she talks about him. I think this boy is the only person in her life that really means something to her. Even though she has been selfish and spoiled, I think she is willing to die if he can have a good home and will be loved. If she lives, she will see to it he has her love if no one else’s.” Lamont pulled Barbara down on his lap, “You know kitten, you amaze me. Here’s a woman who almost destroyed me and almost, or should I say, tried to keep you out of my life, yet you welcome her and believe what she says.” Barbara said, “I guess I’m just tender hearted. I do feel sorry for Natalie. She was never really loved.” Lamont said, “That is where you’re wrong. I loved her and she took advantage of it.” Barbara said, “I wasn’t talking about now. She needed love when she was a child. When you gave the love she never had, she didn’t know how to cope with it.” Lamont asked, “Barbara, do you think you could love this boy? I mean, love him as if he was ours knowing he is Natalie’s child?” Barbara thought about it as she took her shoes and socks off. She said, “Yes I do Monty. He is a little boy who needs love and a home.” Lamont said, “We must be sure. We’ve got a son of our own. He is three and if we bring this boy in our house, we’re gonna have to love them both and yet not let Robbie feel left out or Jimmy either. We will have to spend a lot of time with Jimmy until we can win his confidence and love.” Barbara said, “I know. I thought of that too. I think Robbie will welcome a brother. You know how lonely he gets sometimes. Truly darling, I think it would work fine. Robbie is spoiled. He is the center of attraction. That isn’t good. He needs to know we can love someone else too.” Lamont said, “I just don’t know. I’m just so afraid I won’t be able to love this boy like I should if he comes.” Barbara said, “I wish I could tell you but don’t doubt yourself about loving him. You would, I’m sure of that.” Lamont got into bed beside his wife, “I’ll just have to sleep on it.” He reached out and took her in his arms, “It’s wonderful to have someone to talk things over with.” Barbara kissed him on the cheek, “What are wives for if their husbands can’t talk to them about things.” He kissed her, “I love you baby.”