Blurred Memories (7 page)

“
There’s a lot you give
me,” she murmured. “Just being with you, having you back…that’s
more than I thought I would have again.”

Even as she said the words,
she realized how true they were and that she would have been
selfish to ask for more when Blake had already taken this small
step forward—so small and yet, so meaningful. She couldn’t ask for
more, not now. As it turned out, she didn’t have to.

“
I know…I know what else
you want from me,” Blake said. For the first time since he had sat
on the bed, he reached toward her and patted her hand awkwardly
where it rested on his chest.

Every word was so full of
pain that it was like a blow. She couldn’t bear to let him
continue.

“
Blake, you
don’t—”

“
Wait, let me…” He sighed.
“I never wanted this for you. Never wanted you to be hurt because
of me.”

Unable to stand not seeing
his face any longer, Kate moved to sit next to him. She caressed
his cheek lightly until he turned to look at her.

“
Hey. I’m not hurt. And I’m
right where I want to be, with you and Marc.” She tried to push a
smile to her lips even though she was closer to tears. “Remember,
you’re the one who made me admit this was what I wanted. Being in
love with the two of you used to be scary, but not anymore. And if
you need time…” She swallowed her fears that, even if she died of
old age decades from that moment, it still wouldn’t be enough time.
“I can give you time. Just as long as you don’t pull away from
me.”

She leaned forward as she
finished, slowly enough that he would know what her intentions
were. He closed his eyes. The small jerk away that she expected
when she laid her mouth on his didn’t come, and she could have wept
for joy when he caressed her bottom lip with the tip of his tongue.
And then wept from frustration when Blake pulled back and turned
away.

Marc stood by the bathroom
door, watching them, a mirror image of the way Blake had watched
him and Kate earlier.

“
It’s getting late,” Marc
said after clearing his throat. “We should catch some sleep. It’s
been a long drive.” He offered Kate a small, apologetic smile. “And
I’m sorry, the water’s running cold.”

She had a feeling he was
apologizing for more than that. She smiled back, shaking her head.
“I’ll clean up in the morning. I’ll just brush my teeth for
now.”

She squeezed Blake’s
shoulder before rising from the bed. She tried to tell herself that
they had made progress tonight, but once she was alone in the
bathroom, staring at her reflection in the mirror, she wasn’t so
certain anymore.

* * * *

Now that they were alone,
Marc looked at Blake and tried to figure out what was going on in
his head. He wanted to ask how Blake was, but that was the best way
to antagonize him. Blake would probably lie anyway. His scent, on
the other hand, never lied, and at that moment it was a tangled
mass of confusion and wariness.

Still sitting on the edge of
the bed, Blake shook his head. “I’m fine,” he said with a
long-suffering sigh.

Marc didn’t believe a word
of it, but he asked anyway, “Fine enough to give her what she
wants?”

A shrug was the extent of
Blake’s answer. To Marc, it looked very much like a no. Marc came
to stand in front of Blake, squatted down, and rested a hand on
Blake’s knee.

“
You don’t have to do
anything you don’t want,” he said quietly. “Not the sex, and not
the talking. All right?”

Blake’s lips stretched on a
thin smile. “When have you ever known me not to want
sex?”

Tightening his hand for a
light squeeze, Marc refused to take the bait. “You know what I
mean. And if you think about it for a minute, you’ll also know that
it’s not really sex she wants. She wants things to be back to the
way they were before. But forcing you to do anything won’t help
that.”

If Blake understood what
Marc was saying, he didn’t show it. He swung his legs onto the bed,
and slid up toward the headboard, kicking the covers away to slide
between the sheets. He lay close to the edge of the bed; too close
for anyone to be on that side of him. Marc climbed into bed,
hesitating for a moment about where to lie. Kate returned, wearing
men’s boxers and a t-shirt like Marc; she looked at the bed, and
her expression darkened when she saw that their usual sleeping
arrangements, with Blake in the center, would not work tonight.
When she approached the bed, she slid in on the other side,
motioning for Marc to move toward the center.

The bed was so wide that,
once Marc was in the middle of it, neither of his lovers, right on
the edges, touched him anymore. He had rarely felt so
lonely.

Chapter 6

The mattress shifted. Blake
jerked awake. His eyes opened but he remained very still. The
room—hotel room, not cell—was bathed in semi-darkness. The heavy
drapes stopped the sunlight, but above them a line of light
reflected against the cream walls. Blake listened intently, almost
surprised that his own heartbeat wasn’t thumping in his ears.
Steps, on the other side of the bed. Feet on carpet, tiptoeing
away. Very, very carefully, he turned his head toward the sound,
and caught a glimpse of Kate before she disappeared into the
bathroom. The door closed behind her with a light snick. Blake
looked at Marc next to him; he was still asleep.

Blake thought back again on
what Kate had said and what she hadn’t quite said. He also thought
about the things he wished he could give her, the things he had
suggested, so long ago, but never been able to deliver. He tried to
imagine himself joining her now. He was sure she would welcome him
with open arms.

The only problem was, the
mere thought of going to her paralyzed him. Any gesture toward her
could only end one way: with someone being punished.

And knowing he was only
falling back into old thought patterns did not help in the
slightest.

There was one way, though:
one thing he could do. If he and Marc started without her, she
would certainly join them when she returned. Maybe, then, it would
be easier.

Maybe.

* * * *

There might have been better
ways to wake up than with a talented mouth and tongue playing over
one’s cock and balls, but Marc didn’t know what they were nor did
he care very much.

He remained perfectly
immobile as he slowly drifted out of a dreamless sleep and into
wakefulness, but somehow Blake seemed to know he was awake now. The
long, broad swipes of that clever tongue swept from the root of
Marc’s dick to the tip and back to his sack and then suddenly gave
way to shorter, teasing licks and the scraping of blunt teeth over
sensitive flesh. Marc groaned at that, instinctively arching up,
wanting more, and finally receiving it when Blake’s mouth opened
and welcomed him inside.

“
Yes,” he hissed in a long,
drawn breath, his hand shooting to Blake’s head. Blake stilled for
a moment, but when all Marc’s fingers did was tangle in his hair,
he resumed his actions and continued taking more of Marc’s cock in,
his tongue playing along the underside in a maddening
rhythm.

Maddening seemed to be the
theme of the day. Before Blake had slid all the way down to the
root, he started moving up again, still as slowly as before, his
hand now curled around the base of Marc’s cock, holding it in place
after a swipe of his tongue along the slit and the tight ring of
his lips finally freed the tip.

Marc briefly raised his head
from the pillow to discover that Blake was grinning at him. Marc
glowered. He recognized the game. “Bastard.”

“
Learned from the best,
didn’t I?”

With that, Blake’s smirking
mouth plunged back down. But while his hand remained fisted around
Marc’s hard, needy cock, his lips latched onto a much more innocent
patch of skin over Marc’s right hip. He sucked hard, drawing blood
to the surface before laving the area with excruciatingly slow
licks. Marc shifted under the onslaught, both aroused and
frustrated, trying to get that cruel hand to give him some friction
with little result.

He froze as a fang grazed
over that same spot on his hip that Blake had been focusing on.
More slow swipes of a caressing tongue, and Blake moved to inflict
the same torture on the inside of Marc’s thigh. Blake’s next chosen
spot was just on the side of Marc’s left nipple; the one after
that, an inch or so beneath his belly button, with Blake’s cheek
brushing against Marc’s cock all along, causing Marc to groan as
his length twitched and demanded more attention than Blake’s firm
but immobile grip.

The attention came soon
after, in the form of tight lips closing around Marc’s gland again.
Slow licks followed, and Marc braced himself, one hand tightening
in Blake’s hair while the other fisted in the sheets. Marc knew by
now what would be next and craved the sensation even though he was
anxious about it. He couldn’t help thrusting up as he waited for
that fang to brush against him, and was almost surprised when Blake
let him slide in as far as he could go. The fangs were there,
though, and Marc could feel them, on each side of his cock,
touching without pricking. It was all Marc could do not to keep
moving.

He had to stop, however. He
had to let Blake keep control. Even that involuntary thrust had
been chancy. It could have tripped Blake back into painful
memories, and Marc would have no one to blame but himself if that
happened. It didn’t matter that his mind was murky with pleasure
offered and denied, and he was too close to coming to be able to
think about anything else other than whether the razor-sharp fangs
would cut him and whether he wanted them to or not. He had to
remember. He had to let Blake remain in control, however odd it
might feel. He had to—

“
Oh…”

Blake’s mouth stilled at
Kate’s quiet little sigh. Marc grunted and struggled not to thrust
up again. He had to blink several times before he could focus on
her, standing by the door, a towel draped around her and a second,
smaller one in her hands, damp from drying her hair. Fresh from the
shower, she should have smelled of the perfumed soap and shampoo
she went to great lengths to acquire. Already, though, tendrils of
lust were wafting from her as she observed them, her gray eyes
turned to coal by desire. It was hardly the first time she had
walked in on them like this; sometimes, Marc wondered if she left
the bed before they did in hopes of being treated to just such a
show when she returned.

“
Don’t stop,” she said in a
rush of air.

But Blake was already
sitting up. Marc’s cock made a quiet popping noise when it slipped
past Blake’s lips. Marc couldn’t suppress a groan at the loss of
contact. He looked at Blake, ready to protest, but the words
disappeared when he met Blake’s gaze. Marc frowned briefly,
wondering if he was imagining things, before following Blake’s eyes
back to Kate.

She was shaking her head, an
expression of guilt like a mask over her features. “I didn’t mean
for you to…”

She stopped when Marc raised
a hand toward her, inviting her to join them. He really hoped he
was interpreting Blake’s glances correctly. Kate blushed, the color
spreading down her neck and to the top of her chest where the
contrast with the white towel made her skin appear an even deeper
red. Blushing or not, she didn’t hesitate before coming forward.
She dropped the two towels to the floor before reaching for Marc’s
hand and allowing him to pull her onto the bed. She made a move to
kneel at Marc’s side, but after her eyes flicked toward Blake, she
sat instead, her legs curled at her side.

“
I didn’t mean for you to
stop,” she said again, no louder than a whisper.

The words were meant for
Blake, and he answered them with a tiny smile. “Not stop. Just
pause. So you can join.”

It was as close to saying he
wanted Kate as Blake had come in what felt like a lifetime. Marc
held still, waiting to see if Blake would take things further—if he
would
dare
to take them further. Kate wanted it, wanted him,
and Blake couldn’t ignore that any more than Marc could; her scent,
if nothing else, was a dead giveaway. And yet, days and nights
passed, and Blake never reached for her first; he always waited for
someone to take his hand and place it on Kate. The old rule of,
if you want something, take it for yourself
didn’t seem to
apply where Kate was concerned.

Sometimes, Marc wondered how
long Blake would resist if neither Kate nor Marc helped him with
that first touch. He almost wanted to try, but Kate was already
hurt by Blake’s reluctance to touch her. Marc couldn’t bear to add
to it. Nor could he bear to wait any longer when Kate was already
trembling with desire and no one had touched her yet.

“
Come here,” he murmured,
and tugged gently on her hand to draw her down alongside
him.

Her body scorched him
everywhere they touched, even warmer from a shower that, as always,
had been as hot as she could take. He moved his arm to curl around
her and drew her closer still, until the soft curves of her breasts
were pressing against his side and chest.