Bobcat: Tales of the Were (Redstone Clan) (5 page)

“
I’m sorry you had such a tough time of it, kitten.” Bob’s voice was full of compassion and understanding. He was a good listener and she found herself telling him things she never expected to share with anyone else.

“I spent my formative years among humans and learned their ways, but eventually I was discovered and adopted by a couple from the
Cascade Clan.”

“
That must’ve been quite a change to go from the human world back into our world after so long.”

“Yeah. It was a shock at first. Suddenly, these strange
, yet familiar-smelling people—bobcats—were there, adopting me and taking me away to live with them. I thought it was going to be so great, but little by little, it turned kind of ugly. Jack was nothing like I remember my father being. And his mate wasn’t the motherly sort at all. I think she hated me from the beginning. The human family I’d lived with had been so much nicer, willing to let me grieve. They’d been supportive even when they thought I was a little weird compared to the human kids.”

She knew Bob
had to be surprised by what she’d been through. Most shifters were, when they heard her story. She’d heard it wasn’t really normal for a shifter cub to be raised by humans, even for a little while. Most shifter groups kept track of their children, absorbing them into other shifter families if something happened to their parents.

“Jack always said he thought my time among humans weakened me. And the fact that I was a late bloomer shifting-wise didn’t help.”

“What happened at your first shift?” he asked quietly.

She’d learned since coming here that the first shift was tough for most species of shifters. It also came at different times depending on the level of magic they had. Some—like bear cubs—shifted almost from the very beginning. Most
other species didn’t shift for the first time until puberty, or thereabouts.

“I didn’t shift until I was seventeen.
My cat had been dying to get out and run for years, but my human side was really confused and scared of what it would mean among the Cascade Clan. Eventually though, the cat would no longer be denied and I shifted all of a sudden. One of the other kids was teasing me and I wanted to run. My bobcat wanted to run too and it let loose, forcing the shift that had been so delayed and…” she trailed off, remembering.

“Let me guess. You ran.” Bob’s dry tone made her chuckle, as he’d no doubt intended, and the mood lightened.

He was good at that. Good at gauging her mood and doing things—little things—to alleviate the more somber times. Even on such short acquaintance, he already knew how to read her.

“My cat tasted freedom and didn’t want to go back. I didn’t either, really.
But I had to, eventually. I faced the music and to my surprise, it was the one time that Jack didn’t disapprove of what I’d done. He was actually kind of nice about it and let me off without punishment. I was so green, but after that, my bobcat knew what to do and it helped me through the first few months. When I turned eighteen, Jack wanted me to go to work for the Clan, but that’s a whole other story.”

She fell silent. She didn’t really want to get into all that tonight. She’d opened up to Bob more than she’d ever opened up to anyone on such short acquaintance. Feeling vulnerable, she decided she’d done enough sharing for one night.

“It’s getting late.” She deliberately took her hand back from Bob’s grasp and immediately missed his warmth.

“If you ever want to talk, while I’m here or even after I go home, all you have to do is call me,” Bob offered in that soft, steady voice that nearly melted her heart. “I understand loss and I won’t judge. From what you’ve told me already, you’ve been through more than most shifters
, and at a very young age. You have my respect, Serena. And my thanks.”

“Thanks?” That surprised her into looking at him. His face was solemn and oh, so handsome in the dark night. “
What for?”

“For trusting me.” He scooted closer and reached out
one big hand to cup her cheek.

She allowed the touch because on some level, she realized, she did trust him. The thought should have alarmed her. Instead, it warmed her.

He moved closer and she didn’t dare even breathe as his mouth hovered near hers. And then their lips met and warmth spread from that light contact, downward through her body to her core. When he pressed closer, she didn’t resist. If anything, she met him halfway. Maybe more than halfway. It was as if she was starved for the gentle, yet erotic contact of his mouth on hers as he deepened the kiss into realms of pure pleasure.

His tongue stroked inside her mouth, the pressure easy, coaxing. His passion didn’t frighten her, oddly enough. Instead, it seemed to spark something to life inside her she’d thought extinguished forever. She moved into his arms, wanting more, and he gave it to her.

He gave her all she asked for and just a little bit more, pressing his advantage, pushing her gently to the next level bit by little bit. She sighed as his teeth bit her lower lip when he pulled away. Damn, the man was sexy.

She’d practical
ly climbed into his lap, but he paused to look deep into her eyes.

Not what she ha
d expected.

He’d stopped to let her think. Or perhaps to verify that she was thinking at all.

“You drive me wild, kitten,” he breathed, his hands petting her back and roaming down to her waist. Only the thin layer of her cotton dress separated them and for an untamed moment, she wanted it gone. Then sanity returned.

Her breathing hitched. “You do the same to me,” she admitted. “It’s not something I’m used to.” Shyness returned in a flash and she cringed at her own words. This Redstone Alpha was a worldly man. He lived in a place the rest of the world called Sin City. She must seem the most awful bumpkin to a guy like him.

She tried to pull out of his embrace, but he wouldn’t let her go. He wasn’t forceful about it, but he held her fast until she stilled.

“Look at me, kitten,” he
said in a very quiet, very serious voice. He was so gentle with her. It was enough to make her eyes tear. Why was this one man—this one, unattainable man—so good to her?

Looking up to meet his gaze, she felt
horribly vulnerable. The look in his eyes though… It wasn’t impatient or condemning, or even questioning. Any of those things would only have agitated her more. No, Bob Redstone’s gaze held understanding. And patience. And most of all, compassion.

Sweet Mother of All, he was a special man.

“I think we might have something here, though I know you’re scared.” His deep voice warmed the cold places in her soul. “Heck, I think I’m a little scared too, if you want to know the truth. Now, big bad Alphas aren’t supposed to admit stuff like that, so if you repeat it, I’ll deny it.” He moved one hand up to push a tendril of hair away from her face. The touch was so light, so caring. He touched her like she was made of spun glass, and it made her breath catch. “Just don’t run from me, okay? If I push you too far, I promise I won’t bite you if you push back. Well, not unless you want me to.” He winked at her and just like that, his humorous little innuendo almost made her laugh.

“I’m just not
sure… This is all so confusing.”

He stroked her hair back again, pausing to lift her chin with his index finger so she would meet his gaze.

“I know. It’s new to me too. New and beautiful, and something I want to explore. Don’t you?” His gaze was full of hopeful understanding and a bit of very male satisfaction, if she was any judge. “We’ll take this at whatever pace you set, kitten. But we will explore this thing between us. That’s a promise you can bank on.” His gaze turned serious and she felt the import of his amazing words in every nerve. “I’ve never felt this kind of instant attraction to anyone. It feels important to me. Don’t tell me you don’t feel it too.” He moved closer and placed a gentle kiss on her brow and she shivered in response, the pleasure of his small touch working its way like lightning down her spine. “If you try to deny it, I won’t believe you anyway. Your response to my kisses tells me all I need to know,” he whispered before letting her go.

She didn’t move far, though only moments ago she
had wanted to flee. He had a way about him that forestalled her usual adrenaline-induced attempts at escape. She took a deep breath, wanting for once to deal with a situation rather than run from it.

“I can’t make you any promises. My past…well…I’m the first to admit I’m more than a little damaged. There
are still things you don’t know about me.” She looked away, watching the water flow sluggishly into the pond from the little stream before it flowed out again on the other side. “I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to tell you about it all.”

“You don’t have to tell me everything,” he answered from the darkness on her right. “But you should tell somebody. A healer or a priestess. Somebody who can help you
deal with your past and recover from it. So you can move on.”

She nodded, touched by his understand
ing. “I’ve talked to Bettina a couple of times, and it has helped. I’m just not sure I’ll ever be able…” She trailed off, not knowing how to put her fears into words.

Bob put one arm around her waist, inviting her to lean against him. After only a moment of
confused resistance, she did. There was nothing sexual about the touch and everything comforting. He was letting her—quite literally—lean on him. Being surrounded by his strength felt really good. Really safe.

“I’m glad you have someone you can talk to,” he
whispered, resting his chin on top of her head, nuzzling her hair a bit. “If you ever feel as if you can open up to me, I’m here for you. I just want to make sure you know that. At the same time, I don’t want you to feel any pressure. I’m here if you need me. That’s all. No questions asked. No pressure applied. Okay?”

She nodded against his chest. She liked the sincerity in his words and the fact that he wasn’t pushing her on this particular topic. Her past was a minefield. A tricky place that she didn’t like to contemplate or tell others about. She knew she
still had to talk through some of the things that had happened with somebody. Her cat prodded her to do it, and Bob’s words were a good reminder. Maybe she’d go look for the High Priestess, Bettina, and see if she had some time to spare.

But
not right now. This time with Bob was special. Beautiful. She didn’t want to taint it with painful memories of a past best forgotten. Not tonight, at least. Not when it was so new to sit in a man’s arms in the moonlight with no demands being made, no pain, no anxiety, no worries.

“Thank you,” she whispered, knowing he would hear
. She wanted to give him something—a little piece of her past that just might have an impact on their future—if, indeed, they had a future together. She took a chance and revealed something very intimate. “I’ve never had sex in my human form, though my cat played with other bobcats during the frenzy, of course.”

She referred to the time after a young shifter’s first shift when the beast demanded sex. It drove
young shifters into something they called the frenzy, when the beast wanted sex all the time, anytime, until finally it was sated. The frenzy lasted anywhere from a few weeks to a few years depending on the species of shifter and their personality. Hers had been really bad only for a couple of months and never had she been driven enough to do anything…extreme.

Orgies were not unheard of. Multi-partner couplings that lasted for hours or days were common. Again, it varied from shifter to shifter and among the various species.

She knew Bob was probably surprised by her admission. Sex wasn’t taboo among shifters. Far from it.

When you had to get naked to become your beast, nakedness and attraction to the opposite—or
occasionally the same—sex was nothing new. Until a shifter found their true mate, nothing was really frowned upon, as long as nobody got hurt. In fact, it was considered unhealthy among some species to abstain from having sex as often as your beast half wanted it. To deny the beast was to deny half of your soul.

A shifter had to make peace with both halves of their being. Satisfying the beast was not only a duty, but a necessity.
Harmony between both halves was the goal.

“Did you have bad experiences?” Bob prompted when she
didn’t elaborate.

“Nothing awful. Just fumbling encounters with y
oung guys around my own age. We were teenagers, answering the call of nature in our fur, but it wasn’t anything like what I’ve heard sex is supposed to be, and I never cared enough about any of the guys I knew to want to do it with them when my human side was in control. A lot of them made fun of me because I’d been raised partly among humans. If the human family I lived with thought I was weird, the bobcats were even worse.”

Bob was silent for a while, just holding her.

“I like humans,” he said into the dark night. “I have a few friends and a lot of business colleagues who are human. My cougar side doesn’t always understand them, but my human half sometimes wishes my life was as comparatively uncomplicated as theirs. Some of them have really big hearts and miles of compassion. That’s nothing to make fun of. I think maybe your human foster parents were probably good ones, and if they influenced your attitudes, well, that’s okay. Half of you
is
human, after all. We just need to find a way to get your cat and your human working together, in partnership, instead of at odds with each other.”