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Authors: R. J. Lewis

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Without warning, he suddenly wrapped his hand around my neck and harshly pulled me forward, crashing his mouth against mine. I froze at the feeling of his surprisingly soft lips, forcing me to part my own, of his large warm body enveloping mine, of the way my heart thumped excitedly in my chest. He pressed himself against me, that raging hard-on thicker than before, sending more flutters inside my belly, travelling lower and lower, exciting forbidden places. It felt like coals slowly burning hotter inside me, and it was so strangely erotic, I sank into his embrace and parted my lips, welcoming his tongue as it stroked mine. I trembled, breathing hard into his mouth. He tasted good. Unusually good for a monster.

Without reservation, his other hand slid down my back, gripping my ass and keeping me firmly in place against him. Without seeking my permission, he acted like he was entitled to touch me however way he wanted. He was a cocky motherfucker, knowing I’d oblige after reducing me to a puddle of sparks, ready to detonate at his command.

My legs shuddered and my thighs tingled. My sex pulsed suddenly, the ache within me growing every second he prolonged the kiss, his firm hand still wrapped around the back of my neck. Already, my mind fired a thousand different thoughts. I imagined him picking me up and spreading me out on the desk. Thought of how good the emptiness inside of me would feel when he plunged himself into me, filling me up one inch at a time. I was surprisingly okay with the vision, and it was only because I was
so bloody
turned on.

I was embarrassingly into it, so fiercely out of control, and pleading with my lips for him to keep going.
God, keep going!
I was groaning against him – actually fucking groaning – like he was pleasuring me to orgasm.

Then, just as abruptly, he pulled away from my mouth and I almost groaned out again in dismay this time. My eyes flickered open, and I watched him stare at me with this puzzled look. His chest was heaving up and down. He dropped his hands from me and took a step back, eyes still focused on mine with that “what the fuck just happened” face. I was sure I returned it.

I didn’t say anything.

I mean, what could be said? Like,
hey, why’d you kiss me after I slapped you? Why did I enjoy it to
o
? Wait a minute, a more important question: why did
you
enjoy it? Please, enlighten me, and maybe we can go back to doing what we were doing, slaps and gropes and tongues and all!

Yeah, no. Horny Emma needed to stay quiet and locked away in her cage. The slutty little thing. Shame on her.

He cleared his throat, composing himself. “Consider us even, now,” he said, his voice dangerously low.

It was his sex voice, I realized. And my god, that was hot.

“But from here on out,” he continued gruffly, his eyes growing harder on mine, “I don’t want anything to come back to me because you opened that pretty little fucking mouth of yours. Or else I’ll have to come back and make use of that pretty little fucking mouth again. Understand?”

He didn’t wait for me to respond. He abruptly turned around and walked out, not bothering to say bye, because what kind of guy like him said good bye, anyway?

Just a kiss them and leave them kind of guy, Emma.

My legs were like jelly as I followed after him slowly. Practically panting, I emerged from the office and watched him leave. He was a steady man, tall and confident in himself, but even I could see he hadn’t been entirely prepared for what had happened. I’d surprised him, and I didn’t know how that made me feel.

Because I’d also surprised myself.

When he was out of sight I brushed my fingers over my lips, and they felt fuller than before. I let out a long breath, and the tension slowly left my body. It still felt like he was touching me everywhere, and I tried hard to disregard the strange pull at the very pit of my stomach. Fuck, his mouth had been on mine. Those lips of fucking doom lived up to that name and he’d been turned on by that slap but…but by
why
exactly?

Feeling the curious eyes of practically every diner there, I turned around and hurried away. I walked out of the backdoor and stood in the open alleyway, staring idly at the graffiti on the wall, listening to the birds that chirped overhead, waiting for my flushed skin to cool and for my breathing to slow down.

Only dead fish swim with the stream
, I read over and over again as my heart thundered inside my chest.

 

Ten

Borden

What in the holy fuck just happened?

No, really, he needed to know. He’d only intended on getting to the bottom of why she’d never opened her mouth to the police, something that’d given him a brand new emotion upon learning.

It was the feeling of shock.

Gracious, she’d told the officer he’d been to her.

Gracious.

Yeah, as fucking gracious as a lion is to a gazelle after he chased it down and sank his teeth into its neck.

Borden had had similar problems in the past, and those bastards always opened their mouths to the police officer he sent them. So why didn’t she? When he was told this, he was compelled to come to this shithole part of town and understand. But now he was more confused than ever.

After he exited the diner, he stopped abruptly several stores down.

Did he…Did he just let a person talk to him like that? And did he… did he just fucking kiss that person after they’d slapped him?

What the fuck?

The shock only intensified.

He looked back at the vague outline of the terrible business that he couldn’t even fathom made money at all. The smell of it had churned his damn insides into minced meat.

He frowned.

Nobody talked to him like that! No matter who they were – even if they were twice his fucking size and packed more muscle than him–
nobody
had ever spoken to him like that in four years. And if they did – which they never fucking dared to do – they would have never gotten away with it.

He licked his lips, and still he tasted her. The girl abuses him and he kisses her for it. And not just kisses her, but fucking
ravages
her too. How the fuck did that make any sense? And why in the holy fuck did that make him even hotter?

A woman has just brought you down to your knees, Marcus. Just like that.

His blood boiled.

It was like anger had been injected into his veins. It ran rampant throughout his body. Always the anger, always the inability to fight it knowing the only way out was through. It made him want to storm back in there, grab her by her tiny little arm and demand an apology.

No.

No.

He wanted to storm in there, grab her by the fucking hair, and bend her over that nasty ass piece of shit desk and fuck her hard and deep, just to call it
more
even.

She was terrified of him! He saw the way she shook, the way her light brown eyes looked away from his, and yet…and yet she spoke to him unhindered by it! And that kiss had been returned so heartily, so fiercely, he knew she had been stripped of all her senses just like he had been. And just the memory of what transpired minutes ago instantly wiped away the anger and replaced it with… a weird rush. Like a fucking drug-like kind of rush!

The feeling was so foreign to him, it left him temporarily frozen to the concrete. He could practically taste the colours; they were there, lingering around the edges, trying to break through. He felt a stir inside of him, and something…
thrilling
emerged.

“The fuck you looking at?” Borden barked at a random passerby that had slowed down to look at him.

His eyes widened and he ran away. Yes,
this
was the reaction Borden was used to. Not being told off by a girl no more than half his size with the saddest looking eyes and the creamiest skin and the feistiest little mouth…

His cock suddenly twitched. Fucking traitor.

She was just as fucking hard now as she was when she was fourteen, and it intrigued him too damn much to ignore.

Little alley cat.

He pulled out his cell phone and dialled a number.

“Hawke,” he said, “I’ve got an errand for you. Emma Warne. I want to know every fucking thing about her. Where she went to school, who she’s friends with, who she’s fucking – hell, everyone she’s ever fucked before.
Everything
.”

Without waiting for a response, he hung up and placed the phone back into his pocket. He knew he was being impulsive, but it was a welcoming emotion. It broke the dull void of his day. He hadn’t crossed someone so resilient in a millennia, and even that five hundred pound of walking cholesterol was a disappointment.

Emma was different.

He just knew it.

“The fuck you looking at?” he barked out again at another set of horrified eyes.

Cue more running.

Eleven

Emma

Still in a daze, I made it to Granny’s around seven at night. The porch light was on for me, something she used to do every night I’d come home late while living with her. It was a two bedroom, one storey home, tight for the two of us but good enough for her. The house was over sixty years old and Granny had moved into it after she took parental custody of me when I was seven years old. This was sixteen years ago and I remember it clear as day: the confusion, the excitement, the questions she’d delicately answered following the events that transpired after my mother’s incarceration.

One thing I loved about the house was Granny never made any changes to it. Every time I walked through the door it was like walking back into my childhood, and she tried hard giving me a good one at that.

I carried a spare key with me always. When I stepped inside, all was quiet and dark. I called out to her and heard a muffled snore from the living room. She was sleeping in the armchair with a photo album flipped open in her lap. Her long white hair fell over parts of her aged face. I stood for a while, admiring her and loving her more with the bittersweet realization that she was only going to get older. She was in her early seventies and was beginning to really look it nowadays.

The floorboard beneath me creaked and she stirred immediately. Her eyes slowly opened and she smiled widely when she saw me.

“Oh, you did come!” she exclaimed, putting down the photo album to give me a hug.

“Of course I did. I missed you,” I said, returning her hug tightly.

Later she served me mud cake with a tall glass of lemonade, another child hood favourite. We sat down at the kitchen table and talked about her health, about my living conditions and my job. It took me no time to demolish most of my plate.

“I think you should keep searching for another job,” she said. “There has to be something else that pays better, Emma.”

“I know,” I agreed. “It’s just so hard. There aren’t that many jobs anymore, Gran. So many people are coming to live here now. I’ve applied for so many but the competition’s fierce. The diner is pulling me through enough for now.”

“Just keep applying. Maybe there will be more businesses opening with the flood of people, and you can find a bookkeeping position. No matter how hopeless it might feel, you can only be in it to win it. Isn’t that right?”

I nodded but it wasn’t that easy either. I knew I was getting too comfortable at the diner and was taking my time looking for something else, but there were bills that needed to be paid and I was always just barely breaking even. I had to start knuckling down at finding something else.

“Of course you can always marry rich,” she added, chuckling at me.

“With all of the hundreds of young rich bachelors out there?” I gasped sarcastically. “God, why didn’t I think of that? I’ll just go and pick one out. I’m sure one of them will be interested in some poor waitress like me.”

“Well, the clock is ticking, dear. You’re going to run out of time.”

“I’m twenty-three, Gran! People get married in their forties all the time now! We’re in the 21
st
century, don’t you know? We don’t all have to marry at fifteen anymore.”

It’s true. Gran did marry at fifteen. She was married to my Grandfather for thirty-five years when he had a sudden heart attack and was taken from her. Sadly, I never knew him. She never did remarry, nor did she look for another partner since.

“Well, speaking of such things,” she started, avoiding my eye, “you’re not really seeing anyone, are you?”

“No, Granny,” I answered her, returning to my carb-infested dessert and finishing up the last few bites. “I’d tell you.”

She raised a sceptical brow. “Would you, now?”

“I haven’t kept anything from you. If I was seeing some guy, I’d let you know all about it.”

She brightened up a bit before casually replying, “I just think it’s important you know that I may be old and withered, but I’m also still a woman too.”

“I know, Granny, I know.”

“So, I’m not trying to pry, but I’m unsure if you’ve been seeing a doctor yourself and are taking care of your womanly bits. Birth pills and all that, I mean. Not that I’m forcing you to admit to any of these things if you’re uncomfortable.”

I stifled a laugh. “I’m not uncomfortable, but yeah, I’m on birth control, don’t worry.”

Her shoulders relaxed a bit. “Good, because it’s important, right?”

“Right.”

“What kind of birth control, may I ask? I know how forgetful you can be with your pills.”

I stifled a sigh. “I got the implant in my arm.”

“The implant, right.” She nodded, her thoughts still blazing red. “But that doesn’t stop diseases, does it?”

“No.”

“Are you making sure your partners are sheathed or clean?”

I cringed, and suppressed another sigh. “Don’t worry, I haven’t… you know, I haven’t been with someone in a
very
long time, Granny. So, relax, okay? I’m on top of it.”

“Good, good. And know I’m there for you, no matter what.” Then she shot me her sweet smile that went straight to my heart.

“I know,” I nearly whispered, staring at her as I gulped away the lump in my throat. This woman loved me with everything inside of her, and I wondered how I could possibly deserve it.

“Anyway, I’m glad because I’ve got my sights on a man for you.”

Despite the shitty couple of days I had, I laughed for the first time. Leave it to Granny to try the matchmaker game. Again.

“Oh, God,” I mumbled. “Who is it this time?”

“He’s a doctor,” she answered, clearly proud of herself. “Ever since Doctor Brahim relocated, I’ve been going to him.”

I laughed even harder. “Oh, so he’s your doctor? Is he old enough to be my dad?”

“He’s very young actually. I wish you’d take this more seriously.” She gave me that
wise up, child
look I was more than familiar with.

“So what makes you think a doctor will be interested in a poor little waitress like me? Is it that damsel in distress appeal? Is that what gets his engines revving? I hope not because he’ll be in for a surprise with me.”

Now she was entering the serious side. She pressed her lips together and raised her eyebrows, letting the
wise up, child
look ten times more prominent now.

“He doesn’t care about that,” she retorted. “I’ve showed him some of your photos –”

“You what?” My jaw fell. She always tried this matchmaking thing but never had she gone to that extent before. “What do you mean you showed him my photos?”

“I carry pictures of you in my wallet, you know that.”

“You mean the ones I’m wearing braces, Granny? With my huge curly afro hair? I was like sixteen in those pictures. Now we’ve got a doctor into jailbait all thanks to you.”

“Oh, shut up, Emma. These are recent ones from last Christmas. You are so aggravating sometimes, you know that? Really now, he’s a good man and I’m a wise discerner of people. I’ve already set you up with him next weekend. He said he’d love to take you out to dinner, but I need to confirm it before he books the reservations.”

This was an ambush, I realized. No wonder she was so impatient to see me. I knew she meant well, though. She didn’t have one bad bone in her body. I would only agree to this because it would make her happy, and I felt like I wasn’t doing that enough in her life since being on my own.

“I don’t want to know how long you pestered him to agree, but fine.”

She glowed instantly. I could tell she was surprised by my answer. She must have thought this was going to take a while of convincing. “I’ll let you know the details once I let him know.”

“Can I know what he looks like at least? Do you have a photo of him? You know, I wouldn’t be surprised if you did. You probably took one right there in front of him, you stalker.”

She sighed in exasperation. “No, I don’t. But out of curiosity I looked him up on the computer. He has his own profile on the practice’s website. Doctor Joel Hedland off Amberway Drive, about forty minutes from where you live in Maple Street.”

I simply nodded. “Alright, Granny. I’ll look him up.”

“Good.” She looked at me some more, examining me with her watchful eye. “You said you went out with Lara, by the way. I haven’t forgotten about that. How did it go?”

I shrugged. “I don’t think I’ll be seeing her again any time soon.”

“That bad.”

I nodded and said nothing else. I couldn’t. She knew me inside out. If I so much as elaborated about that night, she’d figure I was holding something back from her.

“Where did you go?” she inquired, appearing casual but I knew that tone. She was fishing for information.

“Um, Owls.”

“The club?”

“Yeah.”

She was unimpressed, pursing her lips and all. “I hear a lot about that place. Know there are a lot of shady people that go there. Marcus Borden owns it, doesn’t he?”

Just his name reminded me of today’s events.

Of his lips and face.

Of how embarrassingly riled up he’d made me.

I tensed and cleared my throat, offering her a shrug. “Does he? I’m not surprised. He owns everything, right?”

She frowned. “I suppose, but I like to deter from any place he particularly owns or even goes to. That man is a dangerous criminal.”

Fuck, I would not be telling her about that kiss ever, ever, ever.

“Yeah,” I weakly said.

“A murderer,” she added gravely.

“Alleged,” I corrected, much to her dismay. “Didn’t you say you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover?”

She raised a sceptical brow. “Borden has no disguise. He’s evil.”

I didn’t answer.

Why the hell was I defending the asshole, anyway? He’d come to my place of freaking work for the purpose of intimidating me into silence, which I’d already been happy to do. Then he kissed me after I’d hurt him, turned us both on, and abruptly left! I felt so goddamn confused, it had made my head hurt just thinking about it.

And why was I thinking about it
all the time
?

“That poor privileged girl ended up dead,” she mused on, shaking her head. “Broke all our hearts when they found her in that river. It was all Borden’s fault. Had he never come back, she’d have continued being a harmless schoolteacher. She was so beautiful, so sweet. Shame. Real damn shame. It always made me think of you.”

I sighed, picking at the crumbs of my cake. “Yeah, I know. You hounded me a lot to stay home around then.”

“Well, you were always out.”

“I know. I was a rotten teenager, and I’m sorry about that.”

No words would ever describe how sorry I felt for putting her through that. They were dark years of mine. I’d been in a hole of depression after my mother took her life away in prison. I spent so much of my time escaping home, seeking…
something
out there in the streets and never finding it.

“It was a hard time for all of us,” Granny said, reaching out to me to stroke my hand. “But we made it through. I’m just happy nothing happened to you.”

I avoided her sweet face at that. She didn’t need to know the amount of times I’d been in dangerous situations. The dumb idiot that I was, thinking I could fight the world with my hate.

The serious cloud eventually moved on from there, thank God. Not long afterwards she grew tired. I put her to bed when she begged me to sleep in the spare room.

“It’s too late. The buses won’t be running now,” she complained.

“The busses stop running at eleven, Gran. I have plenty of time. Don’t worry.”

“But it’s dangerous.”

“It’s not.”

It was, but I knew how to handle myself.

I left her to sleep and began packing the food she’d put aside for me into my bag. The smell alone was making me hungry all over again. She baked the tastiest foods. Leave it to her to fulfil the role of grandmother to a tee. It was a shame her daughter didn’t follow in her footsteps, but I didn’t want to think of my mother, or the fact she had sucked at baking, and cooking, and pretty much everything in life.

After, I did a quick tidy up of the house. I washed her dishes and tidied every room, hoping tomorrow she’d have a good day resting instead of doing the chores.

I dreaded going to this blind date she’d organized. I hadn’t been in a relationship in over a year and even that was short lived and highly forgettable. While the loneliness had depressed me in the beginning, I learned not to depend on a man to make me feel good about myself. I especially didn’t have time in my life to worry about making some other guy happy when I could hardly afford a week’s worth of groceries.

As I was tidying up, I spotted her ancient laptop she’d purchased years ago and turned it on. I couldn’t wait until I got home to jump on mine, so I sat down in front of the kitchen table and decided to look up the doctor. The practice he worked for popped up immediately and I got to see a face shot of him on his profile page. He did look young with thick black hair and a long face. He was an attractive man, and I admit I felt less apprehensive about meeting him.

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