Borderliners (17 page)

‘Dan!’ I threw my arms round him and gave him an affectionate hug before closing the door.

There was no need for pleasantries with Dan. 'Elena, what's up then? I thought I’d come and check on you. You don’t mind, do you?'

I didn’t mind at all, but as I sat down with him at the breakfast bar I asked, ‘Is it that obvious?'

He nodded.

'Well, things have been a bit difficult at work recently. There seems to be more mental ill health around than ever.'

He sucked his cheeks in. 'Well, we've seen something similar in our area too, Elena. Happens, doesn't it? And this is a bad time of year for it.'

'Yes, I know.'

'I sense a 'but' in there somewhere.'

As we talked the kitchen window revealed details of a typical Sunday afternoon in the village. People came and went, mostly with dogs, making the most of the sun, which was out for once, straining to dry the sodden pavements and lift the turgid grey from the sky above. I rifled around in the larder for a packet of biscuits and arranged them on a plate in front of us.

I sat down again and continued. ‘I’m worried that I’m not treating people properly. I guess I wanted to take a wait and see approach.' My eyes met Dan's no nonsense stare.

'Yes, but as you know full well, Elena, at least one in four of us will suffer depressive illness at some point in our lives.'

Of course, I knew this, as it was my business to. Nonetheless, I felt uncomfortable. I knew I would have to come clean with him as my worries appeared unfounded in the cold light of day. Without another word, I went to my bag and got out my smartphone. He munched on the biscuits, frowning slightly. In silence, I flicked the phone case open and scrolled to the photo gallery.

Opening it up, I expanded one image in particular and turned the phone round to face him. ‘Look, I wanted to show you this.’

He wrinkled his brow. In front of us sat a series of images which he blinked at in bemusement. Five hand-drawn figures: a woman sitting between too pillars; an old man with a beard; a grim reaper; a jester hanging upside down tied by his foot to a tree; and finally, a large and resplendent moon.

He came straight out with it. ‘You’re not back into all that weird astrology stuff again, have you?’

‘No, this is The Tarot.’

‘And?’

‘You might not be able to see from this photo, but they were laid out on the coffee table in my sitting room.’

‘Whose are they?’

‘They’re mine, but Dan, I didn't put them there.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I mean,’ I glanced out of the window. ‘I came home one evening to find them there.’

He digested this information. ‘Did you call the police?’

‘No.’

‘Let me get this straight,’ he said, backtracking. ‘Somebody broke into your house, found these cards and laid them out?’

‘Yep, don’t you think it’s odd?’

‘I don’t quite get where you're going with this, Elena. You’re finding the going a bit tough at the moment, I’ve got that, but what’s it got to do with this? Someone broke into your house and you didn’t call the police?’

I got up and refilled the kettle. ‘The police round here wouldn’t understand. They’d think I was a witch or something.’

‘And you're not?’ He winked.

'No, they really would Dan. You don't know what it's like round here. Worse still, they’re already suspicious of me. I was the one who found those patients of mine dead, remember.'

‘Look. The key thing here is that someone got into your house.’ He paused for effect.

‘I couldn't find any signs of breaking and entering and the police wouldn't have been able to either.’

‘So someone has the key?’

‘Maybe. Don't worry, I’ve changed the locks since.’ I hadn't.

He sat back in his chair. He didn’t look too impressed. The air in the room prowled around us. He took a deep breath. ‘I still don’t get it. What has this got to do with anything?’

I got up. ‘I want you to come somewhere with me. Somewhere I haven’t been able to go on my own. You'll need your coat.’

He exhaled and put his boots and coat back on before following me out onto the front driveway where we both got into my Mercedes. I reversed out and we set off at speed. The assortment of terraced houses which lined the village High Street gave way to rolling fields and farmhouses which blurred as my foot hit the accelerator.

The barn revealed itself late as we turned the corner into the clearing. We expected it to be closed on a Sunday but, as I strode up to the dank wooden door at the front, which open easily. I motioned to Dan to follow me. Seeing a shop assistant dressed in black at the back of the shop stacking shelves, I waved and continued until I came to a stop opposite a bookshelf containing some golden binders. They were entitled ‘
Man, Myth and Magic’
. Fixing my eyes on the row of volumes, I gasped.

‘What is it?’ asked Dan, a little jumpier than normal.

‘Hold on, I need to ask that shop assistant something,’ I replied, turning quickly to make my way to the back of the shop. When I reached the assistant, who was up a ladder stacking books, she didn’t acknowledge me.

‘Excuse me?’ I tried, when the assistant showed no interest in coming down from the ladder. ‘Do you mind if I ask you a question?’

The assistant peered down at me. ‘What kind of question? You know we’ve had the police in here every other day since that woman was found dead in here, don’t you? They think we had something to do with it, with her. You’re not another one of those campaigners who thinks we’re into devil worship, are you?’

‘No, of course not,’ I replied. ‘No, I just want to ask you about some books I was hoping to find here.’

There was a pause and the assistant came slowly back down the ladder, her dyed black hair swinging like a curtain around her pale face as she did so. ‘What books?’ she asked.

‘I’ll show you, come this way,’ I said, already marching back towards the bookshelf where Dan was still waiting, staring at the books within it. He looked like he didn’t trust himself to touch anything.

‘These books here,’ I said, gesturing at the
‘Man, Myth and Magic’
series as we drew level with them. ‘There’s four here but if you look, you can see that there should be seven. I can see numbers one, two, five and seven. Where are the others? Do you know?’

‘Oh,’ said the assistant, noncommittal. ‘The police had them for a while, but I thought they’d been returned. Maybe they’ve been sold?’

‘Do you mind me asking to whom? It’s just that I had decided to buy them all as collector’s items. It’s quite a rare series.’

‘No,’ said the assistant a little too quickly. ‘No, I don’t know.’

I raised my eyebrows, thinking it unlikely the assistant couldn’t remember. Looking around me, it didn’t look like they turned over a great deal of stock. Most of the merchandise was covered in a layer of thick dust. Wouldn’t she recall a sale of that nature?

I shook my head at the assistant. ‘Never mind.’

The assistant shuffled back off to her ladder leaving us standing by the bookshelves. Dan made to speak but I held up my hand. Looking intently at the shelf, I ran my finger along the bottom of each binder, counting a total of five.

‘There are definitely three missing,’ I whispered to myself. Gasping for the second time since we had entered the shop, I let my hand rest in the gap where the missing books should have been.

‘Love, what is it now?’ said Dan.

I closed my hand around a small piece of paper which lay in the empty space and pulled it out. I fancied I knew what was on it without having to look.

‘Beware of Queen Bee.’

‘This here, Dan, It looks like the hand writing of someone I know.’

He rolled his eyes and shook his head.

‘That guy staying with my neighbours. He left me a note a bit like this one a few days ago. At least I think it was him.
’

‘Like that?’ started Dan, looking at the small piece of paper.

‘Exactly.’

‘You hang out with some odd people, Elena.’

‘Well, I’m not exactly hanging out with him. He’s just someone I know, but I think he’s in some kind of trouble.’

‘Well, he’s in trouble all right. Looks like he requires some medical help.’

‘No, not that kind of trouble, although I agree with you there. I’m more concerned about his involvement in the community, the one my neighbours run.’

There was a silence as Dan gave me that look, the one which he reserved for when I wasn’t well. Eventually he spoke. ‘I don’t really get it, Elena. And I need a cigarette.’

We stared at each other.

‘Can we go now?’ He pulled out a packet of Benson and Hedges.

I nodded. Pocketing the piece of paper, I turned to walk back to the exit. On the way out, I noticed a cork noticeboard set back a little way from the entrance. I stopped.

‘Hold on a minute,’ I said, but he was already lighting up, pushing the door open as he went.

‘Look, I’ll wait for you outside, OK?’ He allowed the door to swing forcefully behind him.

Captivated, I went over to the noticeboard. Close up, I saw there were a couple of newspaper articles pinned to it and the similarity to the notice board in the dream journal gripped me with a feeling of dread.

I blinked and scanned the articles, finding information about deaths in the village.

Deaths?

Reading faster, I looked at the dates. The articles were old, from several years back. One article from November 1992 read: ‘
Two suspicious deaths in as many weeks.
’

Then there was one further article beneath which detailed the death of an older woman and the disappearance of a middle-aged man. The man was - I caught my breath - around forty-five years old and had been staying with the local community leader and his wife. A rude question mark formed in my mind. I blinked again, coughing slightly. Puzzled, I called back to the shop assistant.

‘Excuse me?!’

There was no answer, so I hurried to the back of the shop. The ladder stood propped against the ageing bookshelf surrounded by volumes left half-stacked in piles around its base. I looked about me quickly for the assistant, but every corner I scanned was dark and empty. All I was left with was a tangible feeling of fear.

‘Excuse me?’ I shouted again, but the shop assistant had vanished.

I glanced back at the noticeboard and the articles pinned against its cork, my eyes resting on a headline: ‘
Death and serious illness in the village. Is village life bad for your mental health?’

Breathing hard, I looked away and marched towards the back of the barn. Heading for the till, I called again for the shop assistant. Silence greeted me and time seemed to slow down. A cloak of sickly air closed in on me as I realised I could no longer see through to the other side of the shop. Panic clawed at my chest and I blinked several times in a vain attempt to make my surroundings reappear. Hyperventilating, I tried to control my breathing, but each intake of breath became more elusive than the last until finally, I felt something hard hit my head.

Voices swam around, jostling for attention. One of them was calling my name, whilst the other mumbled something incoherent. Opening my eyes, I wondered if the world had turned round a notch, as the faces of both Dan and the shop assistant peered at me from the other end of a narrow tunnel above my head. Bit by bit the black walls of the tunnel dispersed.

I was lying on the floor.

‘Elena!’ Dan was looking me over, his face giving little away. Turning to the shop assistant he said ‘Yeah, she’s all right. Just fainted, but thanks. I’ll get her home now, I think.’

The shop assistant moved off, her black hair emanating that vaguely stale odour which reminded me of Martha. I got up and moved back towards the notice board with Dan at my heels. My mind was a slippery customer, I thought, as I stared blankly at the empty cork surface.

‘Where’s that article gone?’ I said.

He sighed. ‘Article? There’s nothing on here, Elena.’

Back in the car, he looked over at me from the passenger seat, his own professional mask clearly showing despite the friendship.

‘Elena, you’re tired out,’ he began. ‘When was the last time you had a holiday?’

We drove home in silence, his awareness closing in on me as I navigated the lanes back to the village. If anybody would guess what was wrong with me, it was him. But I didn’t want him to see how I really felt. I was desperate for my life to be in control.

I slowed down to turn into my driveway, aware of Dan’s bear-like stance next to me, of his hand on my left arm as I pulled up the handbrake and put the car into neutral. Turning to look him in the eye, I knew what was coming. We’d been here before.

‘Elena, love, you remember what we discussed?’

I tried to smile. ‘Of course. But I wasn’t so well then. I’m fine now.’

He took his hand off my arm and sighed. ‘Maybe. Maybe not.’ Then, he pulled me over to his chest and I found I was unable to resist. A tear ran down my cheek as I rested my head there for a few seconds, breathing in his warmth, allowing his broad shoulders to take some of the strain. I let my sadness ebb and flow, my eyes closed until I felt it abate. Finally, I raised my head. ‘I’m just tired, Dan. That’s all. You were right about that.’

He nodded, watching me for a few more seconds as I eased myself out of the car. I wiped my cheeks and took a deep breath as I stood by the car door, waiting for him. He walked with me to the front door before turning to face me, his face serious. ‘I need to get off now. Promise me you’ll go and get some rest.’

I simply smiled and blew his retreating back a kiss as he returned to his car. Afterwards, as I looked into the empty space where his car had been, I thought I saw a figure saunter past, hands in pockets. I squinted into the dusk, shaking my head, wondering why he didn’t stop to greet me.

I stayed where I was for another few minutes, staring into space. The sound of Dan’s engine had long since sunk into the distant hum of the village and the air was growing cold around me. Eventually, I went back inside my house, not to rest as Dan had advised, but to think and work out a plan.