Born of Legend (16 page)

“I agree. But he doesn't wallow in his sadness. And he doesn't blame others. He's trying. That is what I see, and it's what makes me want to help him. He's not like the other darkhearts we've met.”

“No, but there is still a deep, unforgiving darkness inside him. From what I've read of him, he unleashed it against his own brother. Be careful that he never unleashes it on you.”

Her mother was right and she knew it. Only a fool would ignore the danger of this male. While Jullien wasn't like his family, he was still a product of their cruelty. Still an eton Anatole. Which meant his idea of claiming her heart was more likely carving it out of her chest and putting in a box to be burned for entertainment.

“Don't worry. We're only friends. Something he seems to be very short on.”

Her mother nodded while she worked on his knife wound. “Why was this not sealed?”

“It was. He must have torn it open again when Silig and his stupid friends attacked him.”

She looked up, slack-jawed. “Silig is the one who did this to him?”

“Yes. Lev saw us eating together and they decided to teach him his place.”

“Did they not know who he was?”

“Of course not. They're idiots. Thankfully, our side hogged all the brains.”

Her mother laughed at that, then finished resealing his wound, and carefully bandaged his side.

Once they had his ribs wrapped, her mother hesitated. “He is extremely handsome, isn't he?”

Ushara felt heat rush over her face before she nodded in agreement.

Her mother gave her a speculative stare. “So you are attracted to him?”

“I won't lie and say no. He's tempting.”

“Has he made any advances toward you?”

“No, he's been very respectful.”

“Pity.”

“Matarra!”

She laughed and wrinkled her nose. “Your father was an irritating beast, back in the day. I couldn't turn around without him shadowing me. I had my sights set on another, but your father wasn't having any of that. To this day, I'm extremely glad Petran was persistent. And that I came to my senses before it was too late. Otherwise, you would have had another paka … and another life.”

Carefully, her mother applied her oils and rubs to the bruises and cuts on Jullien's body. All the while, she stared at Ushara from under her lashes. “Your Chaz has been dead for a long time, and I haven't known you to go near another male.”

“True.”

“So what's changed, my daughter?”

Ushara started not to answer, but she'd never kept secrets from her mother. There was really no reason to start now. “Vasili likes him. You've seen how Vas is now. He's talking again, and interacting, like he hasn't done in years. And the tiziran's been very kind to Vas. Amazingly so.”

“Your paka will never accept a darkheart near us. You know that. I'm surprised he allowed him to return.”

“I know. As I said, we're only friends. That's all.” Yet even as she spoke those words, she knew them for a lie. Something was different in her whenever Jullien was around.

He broke her heart and made her feel for him in a way no male had made her feel for him since her husband. A part of her was more alive in his presence. More aware of him. More alert and giddy.

It wasn't just Vasili he touched.

She didn't even know why. Or how. But she recognized the danger signs. With Chaz, it'd been so easy. They had been similar creatures who'd gone to school together as children.

Their parents had been friends for as far back as either of them could remember.

Jullien was another matter entirely. His presence threatened them all. He was wanted. Hunted.

Hated.

Her gaze fell to the scars on his wrist that suggested he might even be psychotic like the rest of his family. The gods knew stability and dependability had never run in the veins of the Anatoles.

A sane female would walk away now before it was too late.

“Shara?”

She blinked at her mother's concerned tone. “Sorry, Mama. I was merely thinking that you're right. As soon as he's healed, I'll see to it that he's sent away from here. It's not worth the risk. We can't afford a darkheart among us. Too many of us have suffered at their hands. I won't dredge up that past or ask anyone else to suffer his presence because of my feelings. You didn't raise me to be so selfish. I will see to it that he's gone.”

“Good girl. The Anatoles have never brought anything except heartbreak and turmoil to this universe. Rather than be content with their power and wealth, they have plotted and slaughtered their family and ours to extinction. Never forget that.”

“I won't.” Yet as she left the room to wash up, there was something that she couldn't get out of her mind.

Over the last two days, as she'd done more research into Jullien's past, she'd dug through thousands of media pictures that had been taken of him through the years.

As a royal prince and tiziran for two empires, he'd been dogged by photographers and reporters from the moment of his birth. They had literally documented almost every failure and shortcoming he possessed with ruthless acrimony. He hadn't been joking about the spoofing epitaphs they'd maliciously applied to his name in an effort to publicly ridicule him—something the Anatoles had never allowed done to one of their own royals before. But because he was half human and overweight, it'd been open season on him.

And what the Triosans had done to him didn't even bear thinking on. They'd made the Andarions seem benevolent saints in comparison.

Yet what had stuck out in her mind as she'd scanned articles and photos was that never once, not in all the tens of thousands of candids and official state pictures, was anyone from the royal family ever touching Jullien. There were photos of their mother cradling Nykyrian as an infant on her lap or in her arms while a nurse held Jullien in a cold, plastic carrier.

But none of him in his mother's arms. Or anyone else's.

Even the official Triosan state family photograph showed his father seated with Jullien standing behind him and his hand on his father's throne. Never on his father's body. And none where his father actually touched Jullien, or even looked at him. For that matter, Jullien was never looking at his father, either.

His gaze was always on the floor or on his hands. Or pointedly focused in the opposite direction of his family.

All the rest of the pictures showed Jullien with at least a foot of space between him and any member of his family. Most of the time, they had their backs to him. And in every one, the soul deep agony in his eyes was gut-wrenching.

How could no one see what was so painfully obvious and right in front of them?

Or did no one care? Were they really that heartless and unfeeling that they'd continue to insult and degrade him in spite of his unmistakable torment and rejection?

But then that was sadly the nature of the universe. Everyone was so wrapped up in their own concerns that it was hard sometimes to see that others had their own issues and pain. To remember that those who seemed to have it all, sometimes had nothing whatsoever.

And come tomorrow, she was going to have to find it in her to be as callous as everyone else and shove him back out into the universe that wanted him dead.

How can I?

She had no choice. While she felt bad for the prince, she couldn't risk her family. They would always take precedence over everything else.

Even her own bleeding heart.

 

C
HAPTER
6

Jullien lay in the dark bedroom, listening to soft voices of Ushara's family as they chatted in the living room about her sister's ship and how they planned to pay for its repairs.

“No, Paka. You can't take a loan for that. I'll figure something out. I have no idea what. But I'll come up something. I hear prostitution pays nicely these days.”

“Ana! You have four little girls to feed. Your husband lost his last shipment and his ship. You're still paying off his medical bills.”

“I know. But—”

“I can pick up more runs,” Davel offered.

“Me, too,” Dimitri said. Jullien had yet to meet that brother, but he knew his voice since he came by every night to check on his parents and sisters.

“Davel, your wife is about to have your next son any minute. You need to be
here
. Not off, who knows where. And Dimitri, you're already obligated for your son's and daughter's ship. You can't afford more debt.” Oxana sighed. “I can manage something.”

Still they argued about how to help her.

Jullien couldn't fathom it. His family had only argued about how to cut each other's throats. Who to screw over next.

And how hard.

The door to his room opened.

Ushara slid in quietly so as not to disturb him.

“I'm awake,” he whispered.

“Did we wake you?”

“No. I can't hear you,” he lied, knowing it would embarrass her if she knew he could hear her family's private matter. While most Andarions had heightened hearing, his was even more sensitive than theirs. His pediatricians had speculated that it must stem from some defect of being a hybrid. As a child, he'd been forced to wear special dampeners to keep his eardrums from shattering over any sharp sound.

On the run, it came in extra handy to be able to hear a fly squeaking from two clicks away.

She turned on the table lamp, then gently placed her hand against his brow to test for a fever and check his eye. How sick was it that he looked forward to this each day? This one fleeting encounter with her in the evenings where he could pretend that someone cared about him, and it saddened him that it couldn't last. All too soon, he'd go back to his hovel and she'd be out of his life.

Forever.

Not wanting to think about it, he forced himself to remain stoic. “How was work?”

She smiled kindly. “Fine. You feeling better?”

He nodded as she pulled back his bandage to look at the knife wound. Unfortunately, that wasn't what he wanted her to inspect. Before he could stop himself, he reached out and touched the incredibly soft strand of her pale hair that hung forward.

Startled, she looked up and caught his gaze.

Jullien swallowed hard before he brushed his thumb against her lips, wishing he had the courage to kiss her. But he knew better. Besides, he was Andarion. It would be wrong to dishonor her in the home of parents after they'd been so kind to him. What he was doing already by touching her hair without having spousal or betrothal rights to her was wrong.

She was a treasured daughter of their house and bloodline. An honorable widow with a half-grown son …

And so he dropped his hand and forced his gaze to the floor. “Forgive me,
mu tara.
”

“Ushara?” her mother called.

“Coming.” She straightened up and left.

His body shaking from a need so strong it didn't bear thinking on, Jullien rolled over and clenched his eyes shut. But images of holding her tortured him. He might never have had a dream as a boy, but he had one now.

It was pure Tophetic madness the priests of Andaria would tell him would risk his eternal soul. Yet he didn't care. He'd be willing to pay that fee to have her.

Just once.

He'd never had a female in his bed who loved him. Only those who “serviced” his needs. Most of the time, they'd barely concealed their disinterest and disgust for having to tolerate his hybrid touch. Yet before he died, he wanted to know what it felt like to have a female ravenous for him. One who hungered for him as much he ached for her.

Gah, you're a sentimental idiot. You sound like a woman.

And he was. He admitted it. It was a stupid dream, anyway. That was why he'd chucked them all away as a kid. No need in having them. All they did was torture him worse than the guards who'd been assigned to him in prison.

The only thing you need to focus on is getting back to work before you get tossed out of your box for lack of payment.

*   *   *

“Did you know the darkheart fixed Oxana's ship?”

Ushara looked up from her reports as her father entered her office. “Pardon?”

“I just met with the tech rep to get an estimate on what the labor would cost now that her part finally came in. We opened it up and there was nothing wrong with the drive.
Ti. Dyti. Delidun
. In fact, it was upgraded and better than it's ever been. Looked brand spanking new.”

That was stunning. Oxana's drive system had been burned completely out on her last run through the Solaras System. They'd all been worried sick about the cost of it. “How do you know it was Jullien who repaired it?”

“Who else has those skills and wouldn't bill us for them?”

He had a point, still … “Has he said anything about it to you?”

Her father shook his head. “He hasn't said a word to any of us after he thanked us for taking care of him and left three weeks ago. Has he spoken to you?”

“No. He's avoided me like a disease-carrying rodent.”

“Well, I maintain that no one else would have had the skill-set to do it. Gunnar's been stalling us for the part, saying he couldn't get it in, and doubling the cost on it, like a rat bastard. I was told yesterday that it'd finally come in, after a League embargo and tax hike. He had it jacked so high that Oxana was about ready to sell her youngest on the open market. For that matter, I was scheduled to take out a loan with Frax to cover it, later today.”

She cringed at the name of a notorious Tavali loaner who was best avoided at all costs. Most who took out loans with him ended up indentured for life, and it infuriated her that her family was being extorted like that. Especially from someone who was dependent on Trajen's good graces to stay in business. “Why didn't you come to me?”