Born to Be Bound (19 page)

Corday broke through her growing terror. "You're okay, Claire. I'll keep you safe."

It wasn't a dream, it was real. Claire grew to understand that the more Corday spoke, the more he touched her, the more she felt the sun on her face.

How had she even come to be there?

She
was
separated from Shepherd, in a great deal of physical discomfort, naked, and Corday had taken her in, despite the fact that she had drugged him—lied to him.

She had to remind herself out loud; she had to make herself remember. "I jumped off the back terrace of the Citadel... crashed into snow."

"And you ran here," Corday finished for her.

She had, before air had even returned to her lungs, she'd scrambled up and fled. "I ran as fast as I could... right to your door." Voice breaking, trembling something fierce, she sobbed, "I'm sorry, Corday."

Seeing her panic, he tried to calm her. "There is nothing to be sorry for."

"I drugged you," she whispered. "I lied. And now he'll find. He'll hurt you."

"He won't." Corday grew earnest and severe. "You can trust me. There is no need for you to lie to me again. I can't help you if you lie."

"If I had taken you to the Omegas, he would have killed you just as he killed Lilian and the others." Claire looked to the pillowcase lightly crusted with her blood. "He punished me... I'm pregnant."

Corday already knew. He'd smelled it almost the instant Claire had been in his arms. There was only one way such a thing could have come to pass. Shepherd had forced another heat-cycle.

There was very little he could say, little he could do, but one thing he could offer her. He looked her dead in the eye and asked, "Do you want to remain that way?"

What a question. Claire had to think, recognized that she had been clinging to the Beta to the point where it must have made his shoulder ache. Easing her hold, she measured the little bit of human that she still was, and knew she had not wanted a baby yet. More so, she had foolishly allowed herself to develop an attachment to the monster that had filled her womb, a monster that was using her like a brood mare; a beast whose lover had tried to kill her.

Claire pressed her hand to the tiny life growing inside her. She could rid herself of the issue; abortion was a common practice, probably accessible even now. She could have Shepherd carved out of her.

After a shuddering breath she admitted her horrific truth. "I don't feel anything, you know. Inside... I feel nothing at all."

He gave her space, offering a lopsided smile. "I know it might seem like the world has ended for you, Claire, but you are free now. You're a survivor."

She could not help but sadly smile at a man who would never understand. "Survivor? What kind of future do you see for me? I was pair-bonded to a monster to be his toy, drugged into an unnatural heat-cycle, impregnated against my will so I would grow devoted, and then forced to listen to the Alpha who was supposed to be my mate fuck his lover—a very scary Alpha female who wrapped her hands around my throat, who shoved her fingers inside me right in front of him."

He couldn't stop a grimace. "Shhh. This can be made right."

"It's okay for us both to admit there isn't going to be a happy ending for me." Claire sat up, holding the sheet to her chest, empty. "I have no future, but I can still fight for them."

Brushing back her hair, wanting to pull her nearer, Corday restrained the desire to embrace the sad-eyed woman.  "If you step outside that door and try to take on Shepherd, you won't win."

"I won't win... but I
am
going to act out." A goal, something to cling to, hardened her voice. Claire sneered. "I'm going to do everything I can to make noise. And if they catch me, I'll make sure they kill me."

"Please listen to me." Corday grew urgent, afraid to scare her off should he say the wrong thing. "Let's talk this through. The best thing you can do right now is grow stronger. "

"I intend to." She nodded, knowing he misunderstood. "Shepherd once told me there is no good in the people of Thólos. He was wrong. This occupation has stripped away our pretenses; it has made us naked to our nature. Don't you see? Integrity, kindness—it exists here..." Claire closed her eyes, nestled nearer once again. "You, Corday, are a good man."

He didn't hesitate to pull her flush. "And you're a good woman."

Resting her cheek on his shoulder, she sighed. She might have been a
good woman
once, but the truth was, she was not a person anymore. She was a shadow.

"I want you to know that while you were gone, we uncovered the distributors of the counterfeit heat-suppressants. Omegas were rescued. They are recovering and protected. The drugs were destroyed; every last man paid for his crimes."

There was a flutter in Claire's chest, a moment of feeling she tore to pieces before it might infect her. "Thank you, Corday."

"You are a part of that, you know?" Boyish eagerness, a desire to see Claire pleased, infected his grin. "Your determination—you fought for them. They have you to thank for their freedom."

"I didn't do anything but get raped and cry about it."

"You're wrong." He took her cheek, made her meet his eye. "You stood up to the biggest monster of them all. You have escaped him twice now.
You
are strong, Claire."

But she wasn't. "No... you don't understand. The pair-bond, the pregnancy... I started to care for him, to need him." Saying it out loud made her mouth taste of vomit. "I was weak."

Corday knew none of that was her fault. "Given the circumstances, what happened was only natural."

"I don't know what it was... but
it
was. I stopped seeing a monster and wanted the attention of the man. And once he'd persuaded my affection, he made it the world's sickest joke. I should be grateful, I guess. Listening to him with her... it ripped the pair-bond out. He can't control me now."

The total lack of emotion in Claire's voice disturbed Corday. Whatever Shepherd had done had damaged the Omega, and a part of him wondered if every expression she was making was only because she was supposed to remember things like breathing and blinking.

Oblivious to the apprehension in her friend, Claire continued. "I get it now, Corday. This breach was not about gaining power. We're his puppets, falling rabid at the snap of his fingers. We dance on his stage. Shepherd, his Followers, they're punishing us all for..." she scoffed under her breath, "for blind ignorance. For allowing what was done to them."

"You are free of him, of his lies, and his evil. Remember that."

"The Dome is cracked. It's snowing outside. Not frost,
real snow
. We are not free of him, not when we let that happen. We let this all happen."

"We can take back Thólos."

Claire's breath hitched. "Not so long as he is alive."

#

"Your Omega escaped through a broken drainage gate. Blood on the scene shows the direction in which she fled and that her bearing was not affected by broken legs. The trail was lost when she slid below mid-level and moved out over accumulating sludge."

"How much blood?" Shepherd demanded, skimming the report in his hand for anything relevant.

"Considering the distance she fell, minimal. Internal bleeding may be an issue."

His unforgiving, gunmetal glare caught the light. Impatient, Shepherd growled, "She has not eaten in almost a week. She will not have been able to manage a great distance malnourished, shoeless, and bleeding."

"Was she suffering from morning sickness?"

Shepherd turned toward his desk, his attention going back to the report. "Hunger strike."

Jules, unsurprised by such a statement, remained blank. "When she is returned, what are your expectations of Miss O'Donnell?"

Exceedingly irate, Shepherd hissed, "For her to resume her duty as my mate."

Only psychological damage would lead a pregnant, pair-bonded Omega to hunger strike and jump off a building in madness. Jules grew blunt. "And if that's not possible? Whom do you intend to serve as surrogate Alpha to see to her until she delivers your heir?"

Muscles straining, Shepherd warned, "You presume much, Jules. She will be returned and her behavior corrected."

Jules was second-in-command for a good reason—he was shrewd and willing to act. Employing candor, he stated, "Without physical contact the Omega will willingly accept, she may miscarry."

Shepherd was not to be gainsaid by man or woman. His final order was issued. "You are dismissed."

Grasping that the situation was beyond his original assessment, Jules saluted and removed himself from the room.

Shepherd took to his desk, alone. Memorizing the reports flashing on his COMscreen, every so often he habitually glanced behind him, expecting to see Claire pacing. But she was not there. She was gone. He knew in his bones that his mate had sought out the
noble
man who had offered help. The Beta would take her in, tend her, comfort her, touch her. The very idea that another might hold her, act as a surrogate... infuriated him.

Gnashing his teeth, Shepherd swore. The Beta would die screaming.

Had Shepherd not purred, growled, stroked, followed every instinct to rouse her back from her stupor? He'd even tried to explain.
Him
! The Alpha, the strongest who was never questioned, had tried to reason with an Omega. But she had not even blinked.

She'd slipped so far out of his grasp.

It was her vocation to stay, to be devoted, to love him, to obey. Had he not seen to her needs? Had he not given her nice dresses and the best food? Had he not spent hours simply petting the girl until she was completely content? What was one unpleasant situation compared to that?

Did I not save her life in more ways than one?

Impregnating her ensured her survival, justified her maintenance to his followers. No one could question the safekeeping of his baby. More importantly, it gave her purpose and distraction. Shepherd could not tell her in so many words—she was not one of them, remained far too determined in her ideal of
goodness
to comprehend the greatness of his calling. Furthermore, the reasoning behind his actions was unnecessary for her to know. Shepherd knew that if Claire realized the true nature of what was coming, she would only fret more. She would cry for her pathetic citizens instead of giving all her attention to him. Direct treachery was best: it kept him in control of her fate. But she was willful, so damn obstinate with her foolish romantic notions.

His fist crashed against the table. He roared, upended the entire thing until papers flew and his COMsceen cracked against the cold floor.

Svana's unexpected arrival had been infuriatingly problematic. Not only was she displeased by what she had found, but Svana would have ripped Claire's beautiful eyes out had Shepherd not pacified his beloved once she'd seen what he'd been keeping hidden away. You don't reason with provoked Alphas, you show action. Had he not fucked her loudly, broadcasting his favor to ensure the territorial female did not view the Omega as a threat, Claire would have been murdered the first moment he left her alone. He had done what was necessary, for both of the women.

It was the price to keep Claire.

Yet he had lost her anyway, even before she had run. Watching her mentally slip away, his rush of anger, his outright fury... it was the same rage that had burned in him when he rose from the Undercroft to murder Premier Callas... only to find that the leader of Thólos—the man who'd sentenced his mother to the Undercroft—was richly laced with the scent of Svana's sex.

Shepherd had drawn a deep breath, momentarily stunned as he processed what could not be—until he understood what Svana had done.

The speech he'd prepared for his greatest enemy, the one perfected night after night caged underground, was forgotten. What should have been a quick death, the body to be displayed, ended in blood dripping from the ceiling, Premier Callas's entrails flung all over the floor.

And then came pain far more horrific than any agony his Da'rin markings might produce. His beloved had defiled herself, purposefully tainted her body by mating with the enemy.

Shepherd had confronted the woman he had loved from the first moment they'd met in the dark, the ethereal creature that was his whole life, who held his soul in her beautiful hands. The woman who had set him free, empowered him to gain control of the Undercroft—the very woman he had killed for, suffered for, ached for.

Since their first sexual experience, Shepherd had only ever lain with the occasional estrous-high Omega his beloved had procured for them so they could fulfil the animal urge to rut together as they were meant to. For lesser beings, Alpha/Alpha pairings were difficult, as there was no pair-bond, and it was in their natures to challenge for dominance. But the two of them were beyond such sordid behavior. Or so he'd thought. He had never wavered... not once.

Svana had.

She had fucked the Premier, thrown what they had aside for some distorted ploy, as the final undiscussed crux in her plan. As Shepherd heard her speak on the matter, as she convincingly painted a grand scenario, he could not bring himself to question what she'd
never mentioned
. Svana had planned her seduction all along. Though she held Shepherd and spoke of her love, he was attuned to her; he could smell what was wrong in her scent. What had been done was even worse than he'd originally believed; Svana had chemically forced an unlikely ovulation. She wanted to bear the child of her enemy... to have a traitor's lineage continue the line—a man who wasn't infected with Da'rin, who was born with superior bloodlines; a man who might even be the carrier of the
alleged
antibody to the Red Consumption in his veins.

Not like Shepherd, who didn't know which of the countless prisoners who'd raped his mother had fathered him. His blood had not been fostered through generations with access to secret science and inoculations against disease. Instead he was disfigured by Da'rin that burned in the sun and would always mark him as a castoff.