Bound for Keeps (Men of Honor) (10 page)

He definitely needed a shower. The mirror showed him a week’s growth of beard, pasty skin and bedhead. He ran the water hot and jumped into the large steam shower, letting the soap that smelled like Reed soothe him as he formulated his next move.

Feeling halfway human—and still embarrassed—he dried himself, went back into the room he was staying in and put on a pair of sweats and a T-shirt.

He heard more noises coming from Keith and Reed’s room—a yell—and fuck, he hated himself for even thinking about spying again. Told himself he was simply checking to make sure the men weren’t actually angry, that he hadn’t misread the entire thing.

He had a feeling the whole fight had been about him anyway. But when he got close to the door, he heard softer sounds mixed with harsh breaths and his eyes filled.

He’d had that, this love the men had for each other, and now it was gone. Maybe his loss hit him hard for the first time.

He was crying and he didn’t care.

But he also didn’t make it back to his room before he was discovered. To his absolute fucking horror, Keith found him first.

“Shane, are you hurt?” he asked, a hand on his shoulder, and Shane wished he could turn into that big chest for comfort. Hell, there was nothing to say he couldn’t, but Keith wasn’t exactly his biggest fan.

He did, however, check to see if he was wearing clothes. Sweatpants. Disappointment curled in his chest.

What? Did you think he’d come out naked and invite you to join them?

That image flashed a second time in his mind. Maybe Reed had given him some weird drugs or maybe the fever was back. Or hell, maybe he just needed a drink.

“Sorry. Didn’t mean to interrupt,” he managed, tried to break Keith’s grip as he kept moving away from their bedroom, but Keith stopped him once they got to the living room.

The fire still blazed and he was cold. He dropped down in front of it, because he was having a reaction to Keith touching him, couldn’t face him, because Keith knew he’d watched. Knew he’d come.

He also gave up any pretense that he hadn’t picked this exact moment to grieve, to miss Kyle and the life they might’ve had.

Reed was next to him moments later. Keith wrapped a blanket around his shivering form and Shane drew in a long, broken-sounding breath. Brushed tears from his face.

“Sorry,” he said again. “It’s just…I saw you and I was missing Kyle.”

“Keith shoving me around on the floor and not letting me up reminded you of your relationship?” Reed asked, and Shane snorted in spite of everything.

“When it was quieter. Dammit, it’s not like I go around watching guys fucking.”

“We weren’t exactly quiet. We didn’t mean to do that with you in the house,” Reed told him.

Shane finally met his eyes. “I wasn’t honest with either of you. I was dishonorably discharged from the Army.”

“What happened?” Reed asked.

“They accused me of stealing and selling munitions. A fucking lie.” He heard the anger, the bitterness in his tone, saw Keith nod. “You knew all about this.”

“We figured you’d tell us when you were ready,” Reed explained, but Keith remained silent.

Shane couldn’t, it seemed, for any longer. “Kyle was KIA a few months before the discharge.”

But he would not elaborate on the connection between the two events. He’d revealed enough and embarrassed the shit out of himself.

“I bet you’re starving,” Keith said finally. “Come on—I’ll make you something.”

It had to be close to two in the morning, but his stomach didn’t care. A good sign. He followed the men into the kitchen as Keith began to heat up and lay out leftovers.

Before he’d arrived here, it had been a while since he’d had anything close to resembling a home-cooked meal. He and Kyle never had much time for cooking.

“Here. Eat, don’t think,” Keith admonished as he pushed a food-laden plate in Shane’s direction. It was the best order he’d heard in a while, and he had no doubt it was an order.

He did as Keith asked, noted the two men ate heartily as Keith checked the television weather to track the newest storm. According to the projections, it looked as if it would hover over them for the next twenty-four hours.

Hopefully, Guthrie hadn’t been able to track him. When he’d first arrived in the area, he’d purposely followed the path of the Christmas Eve storm, hoping to disappear into it.

He’d almost succeeded in killing himself in the process, so job well done.

He sighed and Keith responded by spooning more meat and potatoes into his plate. Reed was already working on a big piece of chocolate cake.

“Why are you being so nice?” he asked before he could help himself.

“I’m not nice,” Keith said.

“I try to balance him out,” Reed said with a grin as he finished his cake and grabbed the finished dishes and put them into the sink. “We’ll deal with this tomorrow.”

“Great. Mind if I watch TV for a while?” Shane asked.

“Reception’s spotty but we can pop in a movie,” Reed said. “I don’t sleep all that much either.”

He didn’t elaborate on that, but in the military, you got used to going on less sleep than most. “I’ve slept enough for a lifetime.”

“Not nearly. You’re still recovering.” Keith gave Reed a quick massage on his shoulders and told them to have fun, that he was hitting the sack.

“I don’t want you to feel like you need to keep me company…especially if you’d rather, ah—”

“He needs his sleep after dealing with me tonight,” Reed paused. “It must’ve looked—”

“Hot. It looked fucking hot.”

“Yeah, that too. I probably should be embarrassed, but I’m not. I learned a long time ago that what I need is what I need—it’s no one else’s to judge. So thanks for not doing that.”

“How…?”

The question didn’t come out but Reed understood. “How did I know that I needed that? I always felt like something was missing. When I was shown what that missing piece was, everything came together. So I’m always going to need it, but I found people willing to give it to me.”

He pointed to the picture on the side table. Shane reached up for it, brought it down so he could see. It was in a simple dark wood frame.

“Who’s this?” he asked.

Shane was pointing to the picture of Bobby, taken eight years earlier. The Bobby that both Reed and Keith liked to remember, not the skin-and-bones man who’d died of cancer last year.

Reed had seen Shane looking at the pictures before, but he’d never asked about them and Reed had never offered any explanation. Until now.

“Bobby. That was taken about three months after I met him and Keith.” Reed took the picture from Shane and rubbed a finger over Bobby’s chest. “He and Keith had been together for about six years before I got here. He died last year. Pancreatic cancer. He fought it for a long time because we wanted him to fight—and he did. But he stayed longer than he should have—for us. In the end, he finally told us, guys, please, I have to go…if you’re ready. We’d been so fucking selfish.”

He wiped his eyes viciously as Shane said, “Selfish? You took care of him.”

“You’ve got it all wrong, Shane. Bobby took care of me. Just like Keith. And now Keith’s got to deal with me all by himself.”

“It doesn’t seem like he minds at all,” Shane said softly, and for the first time, Reed began to realize that the boy might just be right. “You mentioned that you lost someone too. Before Keith?”

“Actually, I met Bobby and Keith at the same time. I lived here with both of them.”

“Like, together together?”

“I didn’t expect it to happen either. Like I said, they’d been together for years before I showed up here, lost. Sick. Looking for the inn.”

“Now you’re freaking me out.”

“It’ll get worse if I tell you it was on Christmas Eve.” Reed shrugged. “This place has always had the reputation of bringing people together who are meant to be together.”

Shane’s mouth opened, then closed. He looked over at the picture again and Reed handed it to him. He stared down at it, like he was trying to figure it all out. Instead of saying anything else about the relationship, he said, “You got your degree in the Army?”

“Yep. Bobby was a Marine, like Keith.” He paused. “Have you given any thoughts to your next steps?”

“I was going to see if some private firm would hire me, but with the dishonorable…” He trailed off. In reality, he’d only given it a passing thought, because he was so much more focused on staying alive and trying to prove Guthrie had framed him and killed Kyle. He wondered why they hadn’t asked about brig time—maybe they’d just assumed it, or thought the charges hadn’t stuck.

For the first time in months, he didn’t feel like crying when he thought of Kyle’s name. Instead, he leaned forward and he kissed Reed, felt the surprise in the other man. But Reed didn’t pull away, let Shane come closer.

He took advantage of that, put his hands on either side of Reed’s face and kissed him harder. The man tasted like whiskey and chocolate. He tasted like home…but this wasn’t.

Shane pulled back. “I’m—”

“Don’t be sorry if that’s what you wanted. I’m not,” Reed said.

“But Keith—”

“You needed to kiss me. You needed comfort. That’s something Keith understands.” Reed stared at him. “You like it here.”

“Yeah, I do. I like both of you. I felt it pretty quickly,” he admitted.

“I felt it within the first two days I came into this place,” Reed said. “Sometimes, you know exactly where you belong. Who’s to say it can’t be easy? It doesn’t sound like anything else in your life was.”

“I’m clean,” Shane blurted out, and Reed nodded, asked, “Can I find your medical records somewhere?”

“The Army should have the last ones from six months ago. I haven’t been with anyone since then. You’d have to go on my word.”

“I don’t know why you’d lie about that.”

“I wouldn’t. But I should go to bed,” Shane whispered. “I should never have watched you guys.”

“Did you imagine yourself in my place?” Reed asked.

“Between both of you,” he admitted. Grabbed the bottle but Reed pushed it down, and for a long moment they stared at one another.

“Tell me more.”

Reed could obviously be as commanding as Keith if called upon to do so. He swallowed. Had enough Dutch courage, so he said, “I want Keith’s cock in my ass and you sucking me.”

Reed’s breath caught, but his eyes glowed. “What about the last part?”

“The spanking. I’ve never—”

“That’s not what I asked, Shane.”

“I’d let Keith spank me.”

Reed kissed him this time, but it was on the back of his neck. It was soft, a brush of rough from his cheek. He shivered, his cock straining.

“Think you can sleep now?”

“Yes,” he lied. Reed gave him a small smile and walked back to his bedroom where Keith was.

Shane knew he could stop him. Call him back and Reed could come. But he wasn’t ready for all that would bring yet. Instead, he contented himself with smelling Reed on his skin.

Chapter Twelve

Keith got in a couple hours sleep before the beep woke him. He glanced over to see Prophet pop up on FaceTime on the iPad.

“What’s going on with Reed?” Proph demanded in that characteristic way of his.

“And he calls me a suspicious bastard,” Keith muttered as he rolled his neck and tried to wake himself up a little more. “It’s this Shane kid. He’s invested.”

Proph’s brow furrowed. “I told him about the dishonorable last month when Shane first got there.”

“Reed’s thinking he might’ve been framed.”

“Maybe. There was a short stay in the brig but they couldn’t make the charges stick. They gave him a dishonorable anyway and he didn’t fight it,” Proph mused.

“Shane told us about the discharge,” Reed said quietly, and Keith nearly jumped through the ceiling.

“Fucker always does that,” Prop said.

“Fuck you too,” Reed said as he joined Keith against the pillows. “I know you’re both worried about me.”

Proph didn’t bother denying it and Keith added, “There’s something he’s not telling us.”

“I agree. I feel like he’s mixed up in something.”

“Like guns and warlords,” Prophet piped in.

“He’s running from more than a dishonorable discharge,” Reed finished, choosing to ignore Prophet. Reed looked confident in what he was saying, and Keith had learned over their many years together that Reed’s instincts could also be impeccable. It just wasn’t often that they were at odds with Keith’s.

Then again, Keith found himself more reluctant to let Shane in, as opposed to a concern in a bad, this-kid’s-going-to-kill-us way. So maybe, just maybe, he and Reed were on the same goddamned page. “I think you need some separation. Maybe a job?” Prophet said.

Keith was surprised when Reed agreed with no reluctance. “Find me something and I’ll go. If that’s all right with you?” he asked Keith.

“Always is.”

“You two kiss and make up. Or just kiss,” Proph said and signed off.

Keith put down the iPad as Reed said, “If I go, can Shane stay? If he wants to.”

“Do you think he’ll want to stay here that long?”

“I don’t think he’s got a place to go. Correction—I think he doesn’t have a place to go and I think he’s hiding.”

Keith would have to look into the circumstances surrounding the Dishonorable Discharge more closely. “If you think he needs to stay, I’ll give it a shot.”

“I told him. About us. And Bobby.”

“And?”

“He was surprised, but he recovered quickly. He’s intrigued. Turned on. I think…I think he might be more like me than even I thought.”

Keith took that into consideration. He’d never minded being the dominant one—the role came naturally to him. Taking care of Reed did as well…but there was something about Shane that made him think Reed might not be one hundred percent right. Still, he went along with it. “Which means…”

“He needs you more than he needs me.” Reed whispered the admission as though he was ashamed to have needs at all. Keith grabbed him fiercely, rolled the blond man under him.

“I love your needs, dammit. Love you. Have from the goddamned moment you told me off when I tried to help you.”

“Not love at first sight, huh?” Reed teased.