Bound to Blackwood (39 page)

"You."

"Me what?"

"It's you, Lena," he said as he lowered his glowing eyes, unable to meet her confused stare.

He said that before. Memories from House Bowman came flooding back to her. There, in the corridor, before Crane interrupted and stopped him from explaining, Thorn said exactly the same thing. "I don't understand."

"Do you not feel it?"

Oh yes, she felt it.
She had for years. Centuries actually. It still didn't make it any easier to say. Paranoia bombarded her, forcing her to keep her mouth shut. She just couldn't bear the thought that this was some sort of elaborate joke.
 

"You asked what I'm savouring when I take a breath like that. You smell like cinnamon."

Lena couldn't help herself. She lifted the back of her free hand and sniffed at her skin. Confused, she looked back at Thorn. "What do you mean? I can't smell anything."

A small smile tugged at the corner of Thorn's mouth. "It's like coming home."

Oh Holy Mother of Fae
. If she got any hotter, she would self-combust. So many questions whirled around her head, not least of all why she both needed and feared him at the same time. The look of possession in his golden eyes haunted her, but not nearly as much as the blood-lust she'd sensed. And yet, Thorn didn't look as close to Falling as she'd thought. Confusion toyed with her so that she could hardly tell fact from fiction.
 

Thorn lifted her hand and brushed his lips against her knuckles. Lena sucked in a harsh breath as a golden heat raced through her. "Thorn!"

A feral growl echoed around the room and Thorn's spare hand speared into her hair. Tiny pinpoints of pleasurable pain erupted on her scalp as his fingers tangled in the knots and Lena couldn't help but moan. Powerful lips claimed hers with another growl and Thorn's tongue scorched hers as they danced together, tasting, probing, teasing.

Lena felt she could drown in Thorn forever, but lost as she was in the moment, a sense of foreboding descended on her. Sharp fangs scraped her bottom lip, and she gasped. Thorn pulled away, unable to meet her eyes.

Her first thought was to ask what troubled him, but one look at his face told her all she needed to know. His lips hid his elongated fangs, but she could tell by the set of his jaw that they were there. On their own, they didn't concern her; in fact it was usually a turn on.

No, that look of hunger had returned. It was etched in every taut line of Thorn's broad face. And when he finally lifted his eyes to meet hers, Lena's jaw went slack. Blood-lust so raw and animalistic shone from his glowing eyes that it took her breath away.

"Holy Fuck!" she breathed.

Thorn shot across the room, his broad back slamming into the wall. "I shouldn't have come," he mumbled as he staggered to the door.

And then he was gone, leaving Lena breathless, confused and terrified.

Ryver had had enough. He and Mercury had been working on the code; as per orders, but they hadn't got very far. Well, Mercury was working on the code, Ryver just felt like he was in the way. The curses he heard from Mercury's mind just confirmed it.

"I'm going to check on Lena," Ryver announced.

"Fine," Mercury grumbled, though Ryver knew the guy was pleased to have him out of the way.

Ryver climbed the stairs of the east wing to the very top floor to reach Lena's quarters. Door knob in hand, he was just about to head on in when he realised she wasn't alone. Ryver's eyes widened as he heard Thorn's thoughts loud and clear. The King's heart and mind battled each other as love and duty faced each other.

For the briefest of moments, Ryver felt a glimmer of sorrow for Thorn. It disappeared however, when he heard the desperation in Lena's thoughts. The poor woman still had no idea what the hell was going on, despite Thorn having apparently told her she smelt like home.

How could she both love and fear this man? In one moment she loathed the pure possession in those starlit golden eyes, the next she burned for it. When he was gone from her, she felt starved by a hunger no one else could satisfy. Yet, when he was with her, his touch was almost more than she could bear. The look in his eyes near split her soul in two. The more of him she saw, the weaker she became. And it absolutely terrified her.

Ryver felt ill. He knew exactly what was happening and couldn't say a word. Somehow, Kaden had persuaded an honour oath from him and not even the love he felt for his best friend could make him break it. Kaden said Soraya was adamant that the two of them needed to find their own way. Kaden trusted the Princess, and usually that was good enough for Ryver.

Right now though, as Lena's abject misery permeated his consciousness, he began to doubt his Keeper's resolve. What could possibly be so important that they should ignore their sister's suffering?

The question went unanswered as Thorn muttered something about making a mistake in visiting Lena and stormed out of the room, his mind screaming one thought: "Damned insufferable woman!"

A small smile quivered at the edge of Ryver's mouth at the thought of Lena's defiance. It soon died as he felt the King's golden stare bearing down on him.

"Something amusing you wish to share, Guardian?" Thorn asked, making Ryver feel like a schoolboy caught red-handed with a silly note in class.

"No, My Lord. Not at all. I just came to check on Lena," Ryver replied hastily, sounding exactly like a guilty schoolboy.
Damn it.
 

Thankfully, Thorn's face softened at the mention of Lena's name. Now Thorn knew Ryver was there, he'd shut off Ryver's access to his thoughts. He was the only Vampire strong enough to resist Ryver's ability altogether. Once he chose to resist, there was no need for him to recite his times-tables. But Ryver still saw the emotion burning in Thorn's eyes.

The King inclined his head. "She'll be glad to see you, Ryver. She is in need of things I cannot give her."

"My Lord?" Ryver asked, confused.

"Friendship, Ryver," Thorn replied as he made to leave. "I'll leave you to it." And then he was gone.

Ryver took a deep breath and knocked on Lena's door.

"Go away!" came the harsh reply.

Echoes of another scene replayed in Ryver's mind. Not wishing to relive it, he opened the door and barged in. Lena was in bed and Ryver's heart leapt to his throat as he remembered the last time he'd seen her like that.
Please don't be ill. Please don't be ill.
"Lena, it's me."
 

"Ryver?" Lena asked, her voice losing some of its venom.

He moved over to the bed and the relief shot through him as she sat up. She looked angry and pissed off, but not ill.
Thank the Holy Mother of Fae.
 

"Am I going mad?" she asked.

Ryver's heart threatened to break at the question. "No."

"Do you know what's happening to me?"

"No," he lied.

Lena raked a hand through her bird's nest of hair, her fingers getting stuck half-way through the motion. "Why am I having such weird dreams, Ryver? Then there are the thoughts when I'm awake. Thorn and Eden seem to fill my mind in equal measure and I cannot make sense of it." She looked down, unable to meet his gaze. "Do you know what happened in the corridor?"

Now it was Ryver's turn to feel embarrassed.

"It's alright, Ryver. I know you were there."

Ryver swallowed. "Yes, I know what happened," he whispered.

"And?"

"And, I'm not really sure what to say."

"Oh come on, Ryver. I'm a big girl. Just tell me!"

Ryver sighed. "Well there are two plausible explanations."

"Yeah?"

Ryver nodded. "Either you were tired after the fight and you had a walking nightmare."

"Not my favourite option. It's not like it was my first fight. What's your other theory?"

"You had some sort of vision."

"Nope. Not a fave either. You got anything else?"

Ryver shook his head. "Sorry."

Lena barked a laugh. "Not half as sorry as I am!"

Ryver smiled, pleased that Lena could still laugh at something entirely unfunny.

"What does Kaden say?" she asked.

"He doesn't know either."

"Doesn't know, doesn't know, or is this Kaden saying he doesn't know, and just wanting to keep us in the dark?"

Ryver laughed. She knew the Keeper of the Watch well. "I think he genuinely doesn't know."

"Well. Shit! Bet that pleased him."

"What do you think?"

Lena grinned. "Good point." The smile faltered a little. "Where is Kaden anyway? I know he's not in the country." She paused while she thought further, then frowned. "Is he in
Norway
?"
 

"He's gone to see Marin of House London."

Lena's midnight-blue eyes widened. "Who?" she asked, her voice barely a whisper.

"You know, the Bearer for the Nordic region?"

"Right."

A thought came to mind and Ryver winced. "Did anyone tell you who you killed in Soho?"

"Some Fallen. What does it matter?" she snapped.

Why did he always end up with the worst jobs? “He wasn't just any Fallen, Lena. He was Marin's brother."

Lena stared at him for what seemed forever, her eyes unseeing, her thoughts loud but confused. Her head snapped up as she clung to one memory. "London isn't just my home town."

"Yeah."

Lena's brow furrowed. "Why did he say we had history? I've never seen him before in my life!"

"That's what Kaden's hoping to find out."

Lena gasped. "Kaden's gone all the way to Norway for me? What about the case? The honour of the Order is far more important! Why would he..."

"Relax Lena!" Ryver interrupted her. "Mercury and Kaden dug up a connection to House London before your escapade in Soho. So it's just another line of enquiry, okay?"

"What connection?" Lena demanded.

Ryver told her about the Ashby bannermen. “So you see, House London are pretty much our only lead right now.”

"You're sure?"

"Positive." Ryver watched some of the tension ebb from Lena's shoulders but there was still something that didn't make sense. "Why would it matter if Kaden had gone just to help you?"

"It just does."

"He loves you, you know, Lena. It wouldn't be such a stretch."

"I'm a distraction, Ryver. He told me himself."

"Why do you always have to be so tough?"

"Because I learnt a long time ago that the only person I can rely on is me."

"Ouch!"

"Sorry, Ryver, that's not what I meant."

"Yeah. I think it is."

"No it's not! But you don't understand what it's like to fight for everything you've got. When I was a kid, we had to fight to put food on the table. When I joined the Order, I had to fight to prove I could do anything the boys could do. Right now, I'm fighting to save my own mind! Don't you see?"

"There's no harm in accepting help, Lena. It's not a sign of weakness. It's a sign of strength to know when we can't do everything alone."

Lena gave a slow shake of her head. "I've never yielded in my life, Ryver. I'm not about to start now."

Ain't that the truth
, Ryver thought. And all at once he understood Thorn's inner struggle. The guy was screwed. Worse, if Soraya and Kaden were right, they were all fucked.
 

Ryver got up to leave, his heart heavy in his chest.

"I'm sorry, Ryver."

He turned back to look at her. Her midnight-blue eyes looked tired, her hair was a mess. She didn't look like she had a whole lot of fight left in her. "I'm sorry too, Lena."
For a lot of things.
 

Chapter 26

Lena dried off from her umpteenth shower of the night. Her skin burned but at least it wasn't quite the raging inferno she'd been suffering an hour or so ago.

Her head span. Ignoring the issue, and there was definitely an issue, with Thorn, now she fretted about Kaden. She knew how much he hated Marin. Even more than he hated snow. Yet he'd gone off to the middle of nowhere to help her. Yes, Ryver said Kaden needed to go anyway, but Lena could still see Joker in her mind and the thought of her brother being anywhere near someone even vaguely related to that monster made her ill.

As she sat at her dressing table, she felt her bottom lip start to quiver. She blinked furiously, determined not to cry. Her resolve faltered a little as she stared at her hands. Her fingers had turned wrinkly and prune-like after their excessive exposure to water. She looked down at her toes; they weren't faring much better. She clutched her Egyptian-cotton towel closer, wanting comfort. It didn't work. The fabric felt coarse and itchy and just irritated her.

God, she was pathetic.

To add to images of Thorn and thoughts of Eden, now echoes of Ryver's words haunted her. He'd said asking for help showed strength. But Lena didn't know how. Wouldn't have the first clue where to start.

A mess of a reflection stared back at her and realisation slammed into her. She really did need help.

Resigned she grabbed her phone, pressed her thumb to the biometric print reader on the back and accessed her contacts. As she swiped through the names, not really knowing who to call, or what to say if she did, the answer to her quandary came from the last person she ever thought she'd be asking for help. Before she chickened out, she hit the dial button.