Bound to the Bad Boy (18 page)

****

After they had
dressed, they made their way outside and sat on the porch. The late afternoon
was warm and still. Megan sat close to Matt, their thighs touching. It
comforted her to have him so close. Whatever was said now, they would always
have today and a shared past.

Butterflies
fluttered in her stomach and she clenched her hands into fists. But what if
they couldn’t find a way forwards? What if this was it? Pain pierced her like a
knife, slicing through her chest and making her gasp for breath.

“What is it?”
Matt wrapped a warm arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. “You look scared,
Megan.”

She nodded. “I
am.
Terrified.”

“Of what?
Tell me…now…this is the time. We have to be
honest. Our relationship worked because of our honesty…I don’t know exactly
where it went wrong.” His face darkened and Megan stroked his cheek gently. It
tore her apart to see his pain.
His confusion.

“I loved you
so much, Matt. From the first time I saw you in high school. Two years my
senior, you walked into Math all dark and brooding and stole my heart away.”

“You were a real
cute seventeen-year-old yourself.” He tweaked her nose.
“With
your wild red hair and those freckles making your pretty face even sweeter.”

She frowned. She
hated her freckles but Matt had always loved them. And she loved that about
him.

“Dating you
was such a new experience. You were,
are
,
so exciting. Being your girlfriend, your lover, your best friend was more than
I could ever have hoped for. I was thrilled to be with you. Even though the
other kids sniggered at you when you first arrived, they soon changed their
minds and you had the entire cheerleading team swooning every time you walked
past.”

He shook his
head. “I never gave a damn about that, Megan. Don’t you know that?”

“I do. But it
was still tough. Made me feel insecure that they all longed to see what you had
in your trousers.
To run their hands along your tattoos.”
She gritted her teeth together.

“So they all
wanted a taste of the bad boy, eh?” He huffed. “I never have and never will
have time for shallow airheads or women after a badge just to prove they’ve had
every man they set their cap at. I hate that type of woman. I want real, warm, and
passionate.
Sweet.”

“So you’re
saying you haven’t been with…” She couldn’t finish. It hurt her too badly to
even think it.

He sighed. “Oh
sweetheart…I wish I could say I’ve been a monk since you left but it just isn’t
true.” He raised his hands then slapped them on his hard thighs. “I have
needs…I was lonely…you left me.”

She nodded, her
chest heaving with pain. “I did. And I’m sorry.”

“If we’d
stayed together, Megan, I never would have gone with another woman.
Ever.
You were my world…you were all I needed. All I wanted.
Didn’t you know that?”

“I guess I
did. But I just got so scared. I loved you so completely and it consumed me so
deeply that I began to get real scared. I mean, loving you like that meant that
I was just so vulnerable. If you had hurt me or abandoned me, I would have been
broken.”

“So you decided
to dump me before I had a chance?”

He scowled at
her then looked off at the trees. Megan followed his eyes.
Everywhere,
the trees.
Shielding the cabin from the road.
Sheltering it from the worst of the elements.
Protecting them from the outside world.
Like Matt had
protected her.

“It sounds so
awful when you put it like that.”

“It was
awful.” He rubbed his palms on his jeans. His hair flopped forwards onto his
face but he left it there.
Hiding his eyes as he lowered his
gaze.

“Going away to
college gave me chance to evaluate my life.
Our life.
I hadn’t been away from you since we started dating and it gave me a new
perspective.”

“You realized that
life was better without me.” He brushed his hair back from his face and looked
at her again. He worked his jaw from side to side.
As if he
was fighting to hold back his emotions or a torrent of abuse for her betrayal.

“At first…”
She took a deep breath. Be honest. It’s the
only way.
“At first it seemed that way. I missed you while I was away but
it was good to see you when I came home. But you were often busy with the club
and I felt a bit…left out I guess. I know, I really do, that life is like that
for an old lady but I began to wonder if I could do it. Then…towards then end
of my final year…”

“When I was
arrested…”

She inclined
her head and stared down at her hands. “It seemed like the perfect excuse.”

“Of course.”
He shifted on the step and stretched his long
legs out in front of him. Megan stared at his bulky black boots and her heart
jumped. Even his footwear got her hot and reminded her how much she adored him.

“Oh, Matt, I’m
sorry.”

“I am too.” He
reached out and took hold of one of her hands. “But you believed that I was
guilty?”

“No…
Never.
Not really. I mean…I couldn’t accept that you would
do something to kill an innocent man.”

“I didn’t,
Megan. I was set up.”

“I know that
now.”

“Now?”
He raised his eyebrows and perused her face. Heat
filled her cheeks. She had to explain.

“Gil Creedy
told me what happened. You were just the wrong man at the wrong time…but the
right time for the police.”

He raised her
hand to his lips. “I was a nuisance to the cops. I caused them no end of
problems with my so-called bad boy ways and they could see where I was headed.
They knew I’d take after my old man and they tried to hinder me.”

“But when you
want something…”

“I get it.
Except for you.”

“Oh, Matt… you
had me.”

“Had?” His
face dropped.

She grabbed
hold of his hands and pulled them into her lap.

“I never
really believed it, Matt. But I wanted to because it gave me an excuse to stay
away. I thought that I wanted normal.
Thought that I wanted
to be away from you, the club and Cherub.
But I was wrong. I’ve tasted
another life…I’ve sampled it and given it a chance.”

“And?”

She shook her
head. “It was a bitter disappointment. Maybe, for other people, that life is
fine. They like their nine to five jobs and their holiday weekends with
colleagues and living by the law.
Within the law.
With
their safe boyfriends and their well-behaved children and…and…” It was so tough
trying to explain.

“So you’re
telling me that you don’t want safe and boring and…children?”

“No…no…I don’t
want the life that exists away from Cherub or that doesn’t have you in it. I
love you so much and being without you was torture. I’m glad that I’ve been
away because it has confirmed how much I want to be with you. But I do…hope…one
day…to have children.”

“Well behaved
ones?” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“Well, yes.
Of course.
But spirited ones.”

“Oh I’m sure I
can give you some of those.” He winked and pulled her onto his lap.

“So you can
forgive me?”

“There’s
nothing to forgive, sweetheart. I understood then, just as I do now, that you
had to take some time away. You were a kid when we got together.”

“So were you!”

“I was older …
by two years.”

She mock
punched his chest.
“Big deal.”

“I’d been
through a lot by the time I arrived in Cherub.”

Megan tucked
her head beneath his chin. She knew he’d been through more than she could ever
fathom. His hippy mother with her restless feet and biker father devoted to his
charter meant that Matt hadn’t had a very stable a childhood. She could
understand why the Night Warriors had become his bedrock. They were a solid
presence in his life and with so many strong, confident male figures around
Matt had gained more than one father. He’d gained a whole barn full of them.
She could never take that away from him. He needed his club. But he needed her
too.

“I know, Matt.
And my only issue was my animal lover parents who occasionally forgot to get me
off to school on time, or didn’t have my dinner on the table by six each
evening.”

“They always
loved you, Megan.
Almost as much as the bears.”

She laughed
then and flung her arms around his neck. She pressed her lips against his and
kissed him long and slow and deep.

When they came
up for air, Megan was dizzy with excitement.

“So where do
we go from here?”

He gazed at
her. “Well I have that big old house just waiting for you. I built it for you.
Always hoping you’d come back to me.”

Her throat
ached with emotion. “You did?”

“All yours.
You want it?”

“Yes, please.”

“You okay with
me…and the guys…”

“Of course.
I know how much they mean to you. But if we’re
going to…uh…make some baby
bikers,
you have to promise
to be careful. I can’t live if I’m constantly worried that you’re going to be
thrown into jail for something you didn’t do.”

He gave her a
small salute. “I promise. And how do you feel about our multi-dimensional relationship?”

She grinned.
“I still want that…you will always be my master.
My lover.
My best friend.”

“Well, that
sounds like a deal to me.”

“I love you,
Matt.
Master.
My bad boy.”

“And I love
you, Megan. Sub.
My world.”

They began
kissing and fell backwards onto the porch. Megan was caught up in a whirlwind
of desire as Matt peeled away her clothes and what remained of her inhibitions
then kissed her everywhere. When he entered her needy body, she wrapped her
legs around his waist and held him tight.

There was no
doubt about it. Their time apart had only confirmed what she already knew. Even
after all these years, she was bound to the bad boy. He had never lost his hold
on her and she had never really been able to let him go.

The
End

www.misswishlade.wordpress.com

Other
Books by Molly Ann
Wishlade
:

www.evernightpublishing.com/molly-ann-wishlade

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