Branded (15 page)

“When I’ve only known you for such a short time?”

“I always used to think love at first sight was such a ridiculous idea,” he breathed. “And while I can’t say that I totally believe in it now, I realize love can develop much, much more quickly than I ever thought possible.” I couldn’t suppress the smile that spread on my lips as I leaned toward him just slightly and pressed my lips lightly to his. When I pulled away the same smile was reflected on his own face but his eyes held a new emotion. Was that curiosity now?

“Tell me more about it,” he asked softly as he played with the bracelet he had given me. I still had yet to take it off for longer than it took me to shower. “I want to understand better what it is that happens. You didn’t tell me much detail before.”

I bit my lip as I stared hard into his face, hesitating for too long. “Are you sure? It is going to sound completely crazy.”

“Please,” he whispered, his eyes sincere. “I want to understand.”

I hesitated for a long moment again. I reminded myself though that I had basically declared to him my feelings. Wasn’t he worth the risk of telling the truth?

Yes. Yes he was.

It was difficult to decide where exactly to start, what aspect of this messed up life to try and explain. I decided to start with what seemed the most simple to explain, just exactly what happened in my dreams. I told him of how Adam, with those strange grey eyes, would take me to the narrow catwalk. I explained how each of the council members was devastatingly beautiful yet I could never seem to remember the detail of their faces when I woke. It was difficult to describe the terror I felt as I stood there, listening to the demented laughter as sentencing would be given and how my blood pounded painfully through my system as the brand was raised to be pressed into the back of my neck. I finally ended with how I was always graciously saved as I would fall off the catwalk and slip back into the darkness. I decided it was best to leave out the details of how everything seemed to be changing concerning the nightmares.

There was silence for a few moments after I finished.

I knew I couldn’t tell him any more this morning, it was too overwhelming. It had been difficult enough to say what I already had. It went against the nature I had built up in myself my entire life.

I caught a glimpse at the clock sitting on his nightstand and jumped to my feet.

“Oh crap,” I hissed as I grabbed my tank from off the floor. “I have to go.”

“Where?” Alex questioned as he sat up in the bed, his voice hinting just a fraction of alarm.

“I’ve started this class this week. That’s where I met Emily,” I said as I raced into my bedroom, Alex following me. I went into my closet, pulling on the first comfortable looking clothes I found. Alex graciously kept where he couldn’t see me. “Under normal circumstances I would probably skip it today, considering what happened last night, but I really need to talk to her.”

I stepped out of the closet and started pulling on some socks. “She knows something about my nightmares. She has the same scars I do.”

“What?” Alex gaped. “How?”

“I don’t know,” I said as I stood, heading out back into my tiny kitchen. “We were supposed to talk last night and then I found Sal. So I really need to talk to her today.” Alex didn’t seem to know what to say as he nodded his head.

I grabbed my purse and headed out the door and up the stairs, Alex still trailing behind me. I found my keys on the kitchen table, just where Emily said she would leave them.

“I’m going to see how Sal is doing when I’m done,” I said as I rested my hand on the door knob leading out into the garage. “I’ll call you from the hospital.”

“If you can let me know when you’re done with Emily, I’ll go to the hospital with you if you want.” A small smile spread on my lips again. “Thanks,” I said as I leaned toward him and pressed a quick kiss to his lips. He smiled back. He covered my hand with his and opened the door for me. I smiled back again before going down the stairs to my car.

I stopped in my tracks, just two steps from what I thought was my car. But surely the glossy, very tough and fast looking beast before me couldn’t be my rusty GTO.

“I thought it would be a shame if it never got restored to its full glory.” I could hear the smile on his face as Alex came to stand beside me.

“Alex,” I breathed as I continued to stare at the flawless new black paint job. “It looks amazing. I don’t know what to say. Thank you.”

“You’re very welcome,” he said as he pressed a quick kiss to my cheek. “Now, I believe you were running late?”

“Right,” I said as I snapped out of my shock. “I’ll call you when I’m done with Emily,” I called as I slid into the driver’s seat. He waved once as I pulled out, and I could clearly see the goose bumps that were spread across his arms and still gloriously bare chest.

It baffled my mind and I still couldn’t allow myself to fully comprehend that this nearly perfect man could be mine.

I walked into the studio just as everyone had finished their breathing exercises. Emily barely glanced up at me as she moved into down dog but Cole stopped and stared for a few long moments before moving into the position. I tried to draw as little attention as possible and quickly slipped my shoes off and joined the small group.

It was difficult to concentrate on the session, much less let myself really get into the breathing and stretches as I tried to figure out what I was going to say to Emily, which of the million questions to ask first. I was coming up blank and was feeling slightly panicky.

The session passed all too quickly of course and seemed to speed by in a quarter of the time it should have taken. I knew I was stalling as I took far more time than necessary to roll my mat perfectly on the floor.

“How are you, Jessica?” I glanced up when I heard the perfectly smooth voice from above me.

I stood, fumbling with the mat. Cole stood only a foot away, just slightly too close for comfort. I took a slight step backward. “I’m okay,” I stuttered. “It was a long night.”

“I’m sure,” he said, his eyes boring into my own. I found it difficult to find the will to look away, despite the feeling of recoil spreading through my entire body. “I wanted to invite you to come over tonight, maybe watch a movie or something. I thought you could use a little break from everything.”

“Um…” I scrambled to know what to answer. “I’m not really sure what I have going on today. We’ll see how things pan out, you know, considering what happened yesterday. I’ll have to call you later and let you know.” Within those infinitely deep and captivating eyes I caught that glimpse of Mr. Hyde. A flash of irritation and perhaps impatience. This time however he did not work to swiftly change it to that perfect smile and gentle expression.

He simply slipped into a neutral look. “Let me know then,” he said as he pulled a piece of paper out of his jacket, quickly scribbling something on it. As I reached out for it he maneuvered himself and wrapped his arms around me.

“Things will work out the way they should, trust me,” he whispered.

I couldn’t suppress the shiver that ran down my back nor did I fail to notice how my scar prickled as I felt his breath brush the side of my neck.

As he stepped away, I could only nod and accept the paper he had written his number on. My hands rose to my temples and rubbed at the dull throb that started there as I watched him walk out the door.

“Dang girl,” I heard Emily as she walked toward me.

“Care to share one of the two Mr. McDreamy’s you seem to have snagged?”

I tried to clear my head which now seemed to be in a fog and come back with something to her comment but could only manage half a smile.

“You okay?” she said as she eyed me.

“Ya,” I lied, and followed her to the low bench in front of a huge window looking out at the parking lot. I barely caught a glimpse of Cole’s black car peeling out.

“Did everything go alright last night after I left?” Emily probed, her eyes looking concerned.

“Ya, I guess. Sal woke up and started spouting off some gibberish about not trusting him and how he tricked her. Who ‘he’ is I have no idea,” I added as she started to ask the question. “They asked us to leave after that and said they would be in touch with me soon. I’m going up to the hospital in just a bit.”

After this explanation there wasn’t much more avoiding the conversation we both knew loomed before us.

“We um…never got to talk last night.”

Emily stared at a certain point on the floor and nodded. She was quiet for nearly a full minute before she seemed to find the words.

“What did you do to bring on the nightmares?” she finally asked, meeting my eyes with a probing stare.

“Bring them on?” I questioned, wondering what on Earth she was talking about. “I don’t know that anything brought them on, I’ve just had them as long as I can remember.”

A deep furrow formed between Emily’s eyes as she seemed to consider this. After a moment she finally spoke again. “I was twelve when they started for me. I always thought I was cursed with them as some kind of cruel punishment.”

I waited silently for her to go on, assuming she would explain further and make what she was saying make some kind of sense.

“My father died when I was three in an industrial accident. My mother remarried way too fast to a man she shouldn’t have. He abused me sexually for years and my mother refused to believe it.

“Finally, when I was twelve, I couldn’t take it anymore. I didn’t think I could live through another one of his assaults. So, I went into my mother’s medicine cabinet and found some of her sleeping pills. I counted out what was left. There were ten of them. I figured that would be enough to do the job.

“It didn’t take long for the drugs to start to kick in. I got so tired and crawled into our tree house in the backyard.

I wanted to die somewhere I felt safe and my stepdad had never touched me there.

“That was the first time I had a nightmare. The first time I had the X branded into the back of my neck and the wings appeared. The drugs didn’t work and instead of escaping the hell I was trying to get out of, I was thrust into one that was just as terrifying. Like I said, I have always assumed it happened to me as some kind of cruel and unjust punishment for trying to kill myself.

“Darren tried to rape me one more time after the nightmares started but as soon as he saw the scars he was so terrified he never touched me after. So for that I was grateful for them.”

This seemed to be the end of Emily’s story as she stared into empty space as if remembering the feel of having her step-father touch her in a way no man should touch a twelve-year-old girl.

“And they happen every time you sleep?” I whispered, hoping she might give me an answer to give me hope.

“They did,” she said as she squeezed her eyes closed.

“Did?” I breathed, sliding a little closer on the bench to her. My heart began to race painfully in my chest.

“They’ve stopped?”

She nodded once.

“How?” I nearly shrieked as I stood, unable to control all the feelings that were now rushing though my system.

“Emily, you have to tell me how to make them stop?!” With her eyes still shut she simply shook her head. “I can’t. I’m so sorry”

“Why not?” I demanded, finally coming to a standstill before her.

“It won’t be worth it to you to make them stop. I can’t let you do that to yourself.”

I dropped to my knees before her and took one of her hands in mine. “Emily, please,” I whispered, feeling tears spring into my eyes.

She shook her head again, still refusing to open her eyes. “You will hate me.”

I pleaded for several minutes but Emily wouldn’t give.

Finally she stood, announced she had to go, and literally ran out the door.

Feeling totally flustered, confused, and angry, I rubbed the sides of my head again. The throbbing I had felt earlier had definitely gotten worse.

After taking a few minutes to calm myself down, I picked up the courtesy phone and called Alex, telling him to meet me at the hospital in a few minutes.

I was waiting in the lobby when Alex walked through the doors and despite my flustered and anxious state, my pulse quickened and a smile spread on my lips. He returned the smile and reached for my hand as we approached the front desk. I had never had a feeling as right as when my fingers were intertwined with Alex’s.

“We’re here to see Miss Sally Thomas,” I said quietly to the young looking receptionist.

“Your name?” she asked, sounding absolutely bored already.

“Jessica Bailey.”

It took the girl a few moments to look something up on a computer. I noticed she chewed on the inside of her cheek as she worked.

“Okay,” she said with a slight sigh, not bothering to look up and meet my eye. “Miss. Thomas was moved from her room in the E.R. this morning into another room. Go up to the second floor and check in at the front desk there and they will give you her room number.”

I thanked her quickly and made my way across the large room to the elevator.

“How’d things go with Emily?” Alex asked as the doors slid closed.

“Um,” I struggled to know how to answer. “I’m not sure. I’ll tell you about it when we get home. I’m still trying to make sense of it all but I’d like to just be able to focus on Sal right now.”

Alex only nodded before wrapping an arm around my shoulders and gave a tight squeeze.

The voices talking over the intercom sounded strange,
like they couldn’t have originated from a human’s mouth.

Everyone in the hospital seemed so somber as they stood in
hallways, sat in waiting rooms.

My mom ushered Amber and I down a hallway of wide
wooden doors. I glanced up at her face. Her eyes were red
and swollen. I had heard her crying in the night. She took a
tissue out of her pocket and wiped at her nose.

We stopped at room 325 and knocked softly. Not
getting any answer, we let ourselves in.

My nine-year-old eyes had never seen a dying person
until that point. My mother’s mother was dying from some
infection that I didn’t understand. I just knew it was making
my mom hurt too.

“Go give Nana a kiss,” mom said as she hung her
purse on the hook secured to the back of the door.

I hesitated at the foot of the bed, eying the wrinkled
sleeping woman. Her eyes looked like they were sinking
into her head, her white hair thin and flayed around her
head. Five-year-old Amber rushed up to her and softly
pressed a kiss to her forehead. I didn’t want to, Nana
smelled strange. It frightened me.

“You don’t have to, Jessica,” my mother said softly as
she sat in a seat by the bed. She gave me a sad little smile.

Her eyes were pooled with tears that hadn’t left since she
got that call.

“Mommy, I have to go to the bathroom,” Amber said
as she squirmed on her chair next to Nana.

“Can you hold it sweetie? Daddy should get getting
here in just a few minutes.”

Amber shook her head and hopped up from the chair.

My mom gave a sigh. “Okay, come on. Jessica, wait
here with Nana. Dad should be here any time.”
They left, leaving me alone.

I felt anxious, sitting with the woman I didn’t really
know. Nana had only recently moved to Idaho from
Arizona. She complained how the cold made her bones hurt
and made her skin dry. Now her skin just smelled strange. I
didn’t remember her smelling that way before.

Not sure what to do with myself, I sat in Amber’s chair
and watched the monitor with the green and red lines and
lights. The beeping started slowing down, the peeks rising
in the green line coming more infrequently. Nana’s smell
got stronger.

The machine suddenly let out a flat, loud wail that
didn’t stop. Before I knew what to do, the door had burst
open and a few nurses filled the room. Thirty seconds later
my mom stood in the doorway, her hand pressed over her
mouth, Amber holding her hand.

My breath came in painful shallow gasps. Nana was
dead. I knew where dead people went. The angels thought I
was those dead people.

The doors opened with a soft ding and we made our way down more comfortable looking halls than the ones in the E.R. to the reception desk. A woman with friendly brown eyes and short graying hair actually met my eyes.

“We’re here to see Sally Thomas,” I repeated to this woman.

The woman only nodded before turning to the computer and keying in a few things. “She’s in room 254,” she said with a kind smile.

“Now might not be the best time to see Miss Thomas,” a nurse said with a huff as she walked behind the counter of the reception area. “She just threw quite the screaming fit.

She was throwing everything she could get her hands on at the door and anyone that moved. Kept screaming at everyone, asking why we let him in. She kept going off about how he tried to kill her. He tricked her. We finally had to sedate her.”

My brow creased as I listened to the nurse’s account.

“Has anyone been in to see Sal?”

“No one signed in this morning and our security system is tight in this area of the hospital. The only people who have been in her room are a few nurses and Dr. Stanton.

She’s the doctor who was assigned to her when she was discharged from the E.R.”

I glanced at Alex and saw that he wore the same confused expression I did. “Can we see her?”

“She’s going to be pretty out of it right now, if she hasn’t fallen asleep yet, but you’re welcome to go back. Dr.

Stanton said she wanted to talk to you today, since you’re listed as her caretaker.”

We thanked the two women and hurried down the hall.

“What is all that supposed to mean?” Alex whispered. “She was going off about ‘him’ last night, or I guess this morning, as well. Who is this man she keeps talking about?” I shook my head. “Is she maybe having flashbacks of her husband?” I mused aloud. It seemed unlikely. I hadn’t heard her talk about her husband for a very long time other than in her sleep.

“I don’t know,” Alex said as he slowed and I realized we were already at Sal’s room.

We let ourselves in and closed the door softly behind us. The lights were off and the drapes had been pulled closed, the only light coming from the few pieces of beeping and flashing equipment. I noticed everything possible had been pulled well out of her reach.

Sal’s hair was disheaved and her clothes looked askew, but she seemed to be asleep as her head sagged toward her shoulder in an uncomfortable looking way.

“Poor Sal,” I said as I moved to her bedside. I found a few pillows on the floor, almost under her bed, and arranged them under her head to try and make her more comfortable.

Sal gave a soft snore but did not stir.