Brawler (11 page)

With that she grabs her bag and runs from the room, and I fall to the bed giving her a minute to collect herself. What the fuck just happened? Minutes go by and she hasn’t come back. She isn’t coming back, either, not unless I go and get her. Will we ever get this right? Is she right? Can we ever give each other what we need?

Heading to the bathroom I see the doors cracked open but she isn’t in there. I run down the steps and see the front door is unlocked. I yank the door open and run onto the porch, and she’s nowhere in sight.

I yell her name over and over and I get … nothing.

Grabbing my phone, I dial my partner and her only voice of reason. They pick up on the first ring and with the last of my strength I tell them, “She’s gone,” before I fall to my knees.

R
unning to the main road I was able to snag a cab, which was a fucking miracle. I didn’t know what in the hell I needed to do, I just knew I needed to get out of his house. Decision made, I planned to pack a bag and just leave Detroit for a while. I’m so ashamed of myself at this moment, I feel the best thing I can do for everyone, including Jonas, is to leave. He should be able to meet someone normal, someone that would never mistake him for her ex, let alone put her hands on him. I’m selfish to want him close but push him away, I know that. I’m as hot and cold as he is. Tonight was my fault, all of it. As much as it hurts to think of him with someone else, it’s even more painful to know I could cause him any amount of pain. Because, at the end of the day, I’m not a mean person.

Tears in my eyes, hand on the door, I throw money at the driver, hop out, and run to my back door. I fish out my keys and run inside and lock the door. I turn on a few lights and steady my breathing. I barely make it to my couch when I collapse. The night’s events playing like a slideshow in my mind. Here I thought I had put most of that shit behind me, but turns it out it was right there at the surface.

I would have killed him.

Shaking uncontrollably, I manage to curl myself into a ball to hide. The shame I feel actually hurts. I can hardly get air. I stay like this for several minutes, then I get angry at myself for hiding. I don’t hide. Ever. I remind myself I’m done with that.

Glancing at my coffee table, I see the research I started on the two missing girls and I want to scream. How could I forget about the girls, too? Putting my own fucked-up problems aside, I go back into the kitchen for my bag. I reach down to get the girls’ photos out and head back to the living room. I no sooner sit down then I hear Venessa pull up in Rogan’s truck. She uses her key and storms in looking all sorts of worried and pissed off.

“Are you okay?”

“Not really.”

“Rogue is out with Rafe looking for you. Would it have killed you to have checked your phone?”

“I left his house twenty minutes ago, V. Checking my phone wasn’t a priority since I’ve been home.”

“Am I a priority at all anymore?”

“It’s not like that.”

“Why don’t you go change, and when you come back you can tell me what it is like, yeah? While you do that, I’ll text Rogue and tell him to give us some time before he brings Rafe here.”

“I don’t want him here.”

“You lost that right when you destroyed his face and drew on him, now go. I’ll wait.”

Nodding, I head upstairs to change and compose myself. She’s right, I know she’s right but I still don’t want to see Jonas. An apology isn’t going to make up for what I did. Coming to terms with that is just too difficult for me right now. So while I change, I also pack a bag. Leaving is best for everyone, at least until I finish what Briggs started. Keeping those I care about safe is my priority; whether she believes that or not doesn’t really matter. Knowing I’m working against the clock, I grab my bag and head back downstairs to try and bullshit Venessa into covering for me so I can leave without drama.

“V?”

I look in the living room, but she’s not there, so the kitchen then. Dropping my packed bag next to my other bag, I make my way through the dining room when I see Venessa lying face down on the ground. Just as I rush over to her I hear his voice, and right then and there I make another decision.

Kill Briggs first, help Venessa, then leave town.

“I missed that ass.”

Before I can turn, he’s on me. He has his arm around my waist and the other wrapped around my hair. As much as it hurts, as much as I’m freaking out on the inside, I have to know she’s okay.

“What did you do to her?”

“Nothing she didn’t deserve; relax, she’s not dead yet. Whether she lives or dies depends on you, though. Nah, when I’m done with you, I’ll probably kill the bitch anyway.”

I try turning around but I can’t. He walks us backward into the living room, and when he reaches the couch he turns me to face the back of it. No, no, no! My mind is screaming. Fight you stupid bitch fight!

He takes his legs and uses them to spread mine. Bending me over the back of the couch he starts rubbing his disgusting cock over my clothed ass.

“Scream for me like you used to, baby.”

I’m so frozen I can’t say anything; I can’t even process what’s happening. My mind keeps screaming
not again
right along with
you have got to be fucking kidding me right now!

“I’ll make you fucking scream, then,” he promises, and like always, he delivers.

Holding me down, I can hear him fidget with his jeans. Despite my struggle,

 he’s holding me down with one fucking arm. I can’t see what’s happening but I know he’s gearing up to hurt me and it’s the unknown that scares me, I can’t fucking see what’s coming. He makes good on his word, cutting me from shoulder blade to shoulder blade. The slice isn’t deep but the burn is instant, followed by a deep gnawing pain, I can’t help it, I scream.

“That’s better,” he says, smearing the blood around on my back with his free hand. Knowing the wounds won’t kill me isn’t helping me focus. I just can’t believe he cut me again. Jonas would never do something like this. Why didn’t I stay? Why didn’t I take what Jonas could offer willingly and just be fucking happy?

He grabs my left breast so hard, I scream again. “Listening to me now, baby?” He laughs in my ear.

Enough is enough. I can’t do this again. He plans to kill me, I know it, he knows it. I also know he’ll kill my best friend. Regret is heavy in my stomach; I’ll never get to apologize to Jonas now. When I finish this, Venessa will be safe and she’ll tell him, I know she will. I’ll just have to accept that.

“I’m not your fucking baby.”

I squirm and struggle and get nowhere, and for a control freak like me, it’s so unfair. He’s undoing his jeans now and I know what’s coming, because this wouldn’t be the first time it’s happened. I hear Jonas’ voice in my ear, and his words that caused me hurt before now give me the strength I need to survive this.

“There’s nothing sporting about survival Macy. Do you want to get raped and killed? Is that it?”

No.

No, I do not.

“That’s right, work that ass for me. You owe me for what you fucking put me through.”

Pants down, he leans in to where my neck meets my shoulder and bites down, hard. Pain rockets through my system and I can feel a pulse in the gashes in my back. He just laughs and does it again and again. Cutting me wasn’t enough? Now he’s marking me with his teeth and each time I feel my skin pop; I scream even louder. Not knowing what to do, I force myself to calm down and ignore the pain. My vision is dancing, my heart rate is too high, and panic is taking control.

Before I pass out, I snap my head back as quickly as possible. It catches him off guard, but it’s enough for me to turn around. I quickly assess my options. His pants are down, but he’s reaching to pull them up so when he does that he’s going to charge me. I need to get to my other gun, the one under the couch.

I glance to Venessa and she’s not even moving, and seeing what he did to her puts me in a different place. A place where no man can hurt me ever again and he sure as fuck doesn’t hurt the ones I love.

“The fuck are you waiting for,
baby
? You look good wearing my blood. But I won’t be satisfied until I’m wearing yours,” I taunt him, inching my way toward the couch.

“You know, I was going to keep you, not kill you, but now I’ve changed my mind.”

“Yeah? Then why are you over there and I’m over here?”

“Just deciding where I’m going to start.”

“Is that right? Made a decision yet?”

“That mouth of yours is first to bleed.”

He lunges for me when I lunge for the floor. His fingers are digging into my skin as he finds his way up my body. In return my fingers are digging for purchase in the carpet in an effort to reach under and grab it. When he flips me over I use my elbow to connect with his jaw. He’s stunned for a second but then zones right back in on me.

“You think I don’t know your fucking around with that detective, you little slut? How did you think that was going to go over? You think I want to hurt you? You give me no choice with that smart mouth of yours.”

Suddenly my head is lifted up and then reacquainted with the floor.

“Answer me, Macy! I actually thought I could love you and you fucking had me arrested, then you leave me for another cop!”

Again my head meets carpet. Just another three inches and I’ll have it if I can manage to stay conscious.

I’m granted a reprieve when he flips me onto my back. Now, I can breathe and use my legs, but I still can’t reach the gun.

“I don’t love you, Briggs. I’ve never loved you, could never love you.”

“Bullshit. You loved me, loved how I fucked you, loved how I made it hurt so good. You begged for that shit.”

He goes for his pants again and my legs are in a weak position because they are spread apart, but he moves to get his shirt off and I have a window so I take it. I bring both legs up to my chin and donkey kick his fucking body, sending him ass over elbows.

I scramble back blindly reaching under trying to locate my gun when he stalks toward me naked, knife in hand. Securing my gun I keep it hidden behind my back until he’s reaching for me. That’s when I pull it out and point it square at his chest. He looks down and laughs.

“When’d you learn how to fight? Take a self-defense class, baby? It’s hot, but it ain’t gonna work. You’re mine, and I take what’s mine.”

“I always knew how to fight, bitch, but unlike you, I prefer a challenge. You are not taking from me anymore, Briggs. You aren’t walking out of here.”

The moment his name left my mouth, he moves so fucking fast I can’t deflect. Almost breaking my wrist, the gun drops with a thud, then turning me away from him, he has his knife at my throat within seconds.

That’s the same moment there is pounding on my front door.

“Princess, open up, it’s me.”

Jesus, I can’t let him get hurt, too. But I’m also smart enough to know I’m in over my head. For a split second, I am close to crying, but then anger fills its place. I want to scream at him to save me, I want to scream this shit isn’t fair, but neither of those things happen. Instead, I decide keeping him safe is the least I can do for him. He can do better than me; he deserves a woman who isn’t busted apart on the inside. He deserves someone stronger, someone who wouldn’t find herself in situations like this because she wasn’t smart enough to get out. I’m a walking victim and a goddamn train wreck, and it’s my own fault.

“Tell your boyfriend to go away, baby; or I’ll make you watch while I kill her, then kill him.”

“Now is not a good time,
Rafe.
”

“Macy?” He pauses. “Macy, open the door … please.”

“
Rafe,
please, just go away, okay? I’m tired and I don’t want any visitors.”

“Macy, Venessa is worried about you. Have you seen her?”

“She’s out, I mean she left, I made her leave.
Rogue
picked her up.
Rafe
, I can’t do this right now, I can’t be with you, please just go.” Even as I say it my heart breaks. I don’t mean it, but he doesn’t know that.

“Okay, Macy, you win. You fucking win!” Hearing his feet pound on the steps then his truck fire up, I almost sag in Briggs’ arms. My heart is racing and my body is going into shock, I can feel it. Does he understand? He does, right?  Is Rogan with him? Please let Rogan be with him.

In the end, I do sag with relief, knowing even if he didn’t get my meaning he’s out of harm’s way for now. I can save Venessa, I know I can. I just needed an opportunity, even a small one.

“He’s gone, okay? I’m all yours now.”

“No shit.”

“Now what? Gonna torture me now?”

“Nah, what I’ve been dreaming of doing since you had me locked up. Come here.”

“I’m not moving until you tell me why you’re doing this.”
And to give Venessa time to wake up,
I think to myself.

“You have no idea how cops are treated in lock up, do you? You know what? There’s time for that later, I’ve got someone who wants to see you and once you give him what’s in that beautiful brain of yours. Then you and I are going to have ourselves a little reunion. I can slit your throat later.”