Breaking All the Rules (15 page)

Except it
wouldn’t stop there. She would want to feel more, run her hand up to his bicep,
feel the hard, packed muscle. To launch herself out of her seat and straddle
him, to grind against him and feel his body respond, every twitch and shudder
beneath her. It wouldn’t stop there either. They’d have to go somewhere private—

Well, this is
a hospital
, she realized.
There are plenty of beds around….

“No.”

Nina jerked her
head toward him in surprise to find him watching her. “What do you mean, ‘no?’”

“We’re not going
to fool around here. Not until we have a real date.”

“How’d you know
what I was thinking?”

He grinned.
“Come on, Nina. By now I know what you look like when you’re turned on—and when
you’re ready for some action. You look like you’re about to jump on top of me.”

Damn. She hated
being so obvious.

“You know,” Nina
said slowly. “Some people would consider this a date.”

Bobby shot her
an amused look, one eyebrow shooting up. “Really?”

“Sure. Two of
us, spending time together, talking, not having sex.” At least not yet. “And we
are in public like you wanted. Sounds like a date.”

“Too bad for you
I’m not one of those people.”

Nina scowled at
him. “At least it would give us something to do besides wait.” She checked the
clock on the wall. The hands had barely moved since the last time she looked.
All of two minutes had passed. “You’re right. Part of me does wish I was in
there. At least then I’d know what was happening.”

“She’s going to
be fine,” he said calmly. “You said so yourself.”

“I didn’t know
what I was talking about,” Nina admitted. “I was just trying to stay calm for
her sake and make her feel better.”

“Either way, you
were right. She’ll be fine. Women have babies every day.”

“Not women I
know.” Still, she had to admit the evenness of his voice was having the same
effect on her that she’d been hoping to give Jackie. He sounded as certain as
she had, and it did make her feel better.

Nina risked a
glance at him. “You have a lot of experience with pregnant women?”

“Nope. None at
all. But it seems like a pretty normal thing. I figure there’s no point
worrying until we have reason to.” He turned in his chair to look at her. “What
about you? Do you want kids?”

Nina almost
flinched, her skin suddenly prickling with unease. Not from the question
itself, but from the implications of it. It was too personal. She didn’t want
to talk about the future with him. What she wanted didn’t matter, wasn’t really
any of his business. Because he had no place in her future. He couldn’t.

She scrambled to
think of a way to dodge the question without seeming like a jerk and came up
empty. “Maybe. Someday,” she said faintly. She quickly shifted away from him,
hoping he’d take the hint.

She should have
known better. “I’ve started thinking I might too,” he said. “I honestly never
thought about it before, wasn’t in any kind of hurry to get married or have
kids. Maybe since I never had that kind of family growing up, it wasn’t
something I ever pictured for myself. At least until recently. I guess it’s
only natural to start thinking about that kind of thing when you get older.”

He’d never
mentioned anything about his family before, she thought with a twinge. She’d
always thought it was just because they didn’t have that kind of relationship.
She’d never imagined that he simply didn’t have anyone. Never thought about it
at all really.

The inevitable question
rose in her mouth, begging to be asked. She tried telling herself it was
because she didn’t want to be rude and she had to say something, even as she
recognized, deep down, that part of her wanted to know.

“You didn’t have
any family?” she asked softly.

“Not really. It
was just my mom and me. She raised me herself.”

From the
affection in his voice and the trace of melancholy as he talked about her, his
mother meant a lot to him—and Nina suspected the woman was no longer alive.

“Where is she
now?”

“She died when I
was twenty, a year after I enlisted. The last time I ever saw her was at my
boot camp graduation. You should have seen how proud she was.”

Nina didn’t have
to know what the woman looked like to imagine it. “I’m sure she was.”

“About six months
later, she was in a car accident. I made it back to Phoenix for the funeral,
but I never got to say goodbye.”

Nina could hear
his sadness even all these years later, the sound driving a lump into her
throat. She hadn’t gotten to say goodbye to her father either. It was something
they had in common.

Suddenly she
wanted to reach out and touch him for entirely different reasons than before.
She managed to resist the impulse, touching him suddenly seeming more dangerous
than ever.

“I’m sorry,” she
said. She knew how inadequate the words were, but she meant them
wholeheartedly.

Bobby glanced
over at her and gave her a thin smile. “Me too.”

“Why didn’t you
mention this yesterday, when I told you about my dad?”

He frowned, and
she could see his surprise. “I don’t know. I didn’t think of it.”

Nina studied him
for a long moment. It seemed strange. If he was trying to build a connection
between them, it would have been natural for him to bring it up. Yet it hadn’t
even occurred to him.

The more she
thought about it, the more she realized he really hadn’t told her that much
about himself over the past few days. He’d mostly tried to get her to open up
to him.

For all his
determination that they should date and get to know each other, she had the
feeling that he was as out of practice at this as she was. She’d always thought
he hadn’t shared many personal details with her because that was how their deal
was supposed to work. But maybe it was just his nature not to talk about things
at all. It could be the military thing. Her dad hadn’t been much for talking
about his feelings or sharing much of his thoughts. The same could be true for
Bobby. It could just be that he was used to keeping things close to his chest.

Part of her
couldn’t help wishing he’d done a better job of it. She didn’t want to know
those kinds of things about him, didn’t want any of the details that humanized
him, made him anything more than the hot guy who rocked her world.

Even as she
thought it, the words had already sunk in, having exactly the effect she’d been
afraid of. Her eyes poured over the familiar face that suddenly seemed
mysterious to her. She couldn’t help but see him differently, her picture of
him inevitably changing with the new information. It was one thing to know he
had probably had a mother like everybody else. It was another to know he’d been
raised alone by her, that he’d loved her, and she’d died. She hadn’t even known
that he was from Phoenix.

Wished she
didn’t know now. It made it too…real. Made her feel things toward him that she
didn’t want to be feeling at all.

Nina quickly
looked away, the motion taking some effort. “I wonder how much longer it’s
going to be.”

“I guess there’s
no way of knowing.”

Her stomach
still knotted up, Nina rubbed her arms in an attempt to shake off the emotions
churning in her belly. As uncomfortable as the situation was getting for her,
it was nothing compared to what Jackie was experiencing right now. She needed
to remember that and keep her focus on the younger woman. It was why they were
here, to be here for her, since no one else could be.

She realized
that Jackie’s husband probably didn’t even know she was in labor and the baby
was coming. There hadn’t been any way to reach him. He really was missing the
whole thing. “I wish Travis could have been here,” she murmured.

Bobby didn’t say
anything for a moment. “You’re holding it against him for not being here,
aren’t you?”

Nina frowned in
surprise. “No, why would I?”

“Because he’s in
the military.”

She didn’t miss
the edge in his words. All she could do was shrug a shoulder lightly. “That’s
how it works. Jackie knew what she was signing up for. It was her choice. She
decided it would be worth it for her.”

“But not for
you?”

“No,” she said
simply, not hesitating for a second. “If I ever have a baby, I want the father
to be there. I want to know I’m not alone.” The way her mother had been for so
much of Nina’s childhood.

“But she’s not
alone,” Bobby said softly. “You’re here. So am I. And Ashley will be soon.”

“It’s not the
same thing, and you know it.”

He opened his
mouth to respond, and Nina could see that he wanted to argue the point. He
couldn’t, finally shutting his mouth, frustration flashing across his face.

Because she was
right. They both knew it. Just like she knew there was no point discussing it.
There was nothing to say. He seemed to agree, as they fell into an
uncomfortable silence.

A woman suddenly
burst into the waiting area, shattering the quiet between them. They both
looked up.

It was Ashley.
Relief washed over her face as she spotted them. Breathless, she hurried toward
them. “What’s going on? How is she?”

“As far as we
know, she’s fine,” Nina said. “Nobody’s been out to tell us anything in a
while.”

The words were
barely out when the doors that led to the delivery rooms opened. Nina instantly
recognized Jackie’s Lamaze coach. Paula, that was her name. The woman was all
smiles.

Nina bolted to
her feet, Bobby doing the same beside her a heartbeat later.

“He’s here!”
Paula announced.

“Already?” Nina
blurted out. “The doctor said it could take a long time—”

“It can, but it
looks like this little guy was in a hurry.”

“And
everything’s okay?” Ashley asked.

“Perfect,” she
assured them. “He’s beautiful. You can come see if you want. Jackie’s asking
for you.”

Nina exchanged
broad, relieved smiles with Ashley, who moved forward to join the other woman.
Nina took a step to do the same, only to stop and glance at Bobby.

He nodded toward
the doors with a smile. “Go on. It sounds like she wants you.”

Nina hesitated,
wondering if she should ask if he wanted to come in. He didn’t know Jackie, but
he’d brought them here and waited all this time, and Jackie had mentioned how
glad she was for his help. “Do you want to...?”

He shook his
head. “No, this is for close friends. Go ahead.”

“Okay,” she
said, a little relieved. “I guess you don’t have to stick around then. Ash can
give me a ride home.”

If he was
disappointed, he didn’t show it. “Sure. Should we try again tomorrow?”

Nina blinked at
him in surprise. “You still want to go on the date?”

“I got a raincheck,
didn’t I?”

She was more
convinced than ever it wasn’t a good idea. That last exchange they’d had before
Ashley appeared had only confirmed that there was no point pursuing anything.
What they wanted in life, who they each were, simply couldn’t work.

And yet, staring
up at him, she felt that familiar charge in her belly, her heart picking up
speed.

Foolish or not,
she still wanted that last night.

Weak, woman.
You are so damn weak.

“Okay,” she
said.

“Same time?”

“Sure.”

One corner of
his mouth curved upward. “I’ll see you then.”

With a tight
nod, she quickly turned away. Ashley was waiting for her by the doors. Nina
picked up speed to meet her, sensing Bobby’s eyes on her the entire way. When
the doors finally closed shut behind her and she could no longer feel him, she
let out a small sign of relief.

She tried to
push him out of mind, for now at least. Until their last night together.

He really was a
good guy. She might not know nearly enough about him, but she knew that much.
There wasn’t a doubt in her mind.

But all he’d
done was remind her that he wasn’t the right guy for her.

Chapter Seven

Exactly
twenty-four hours after their first attempt at a date, Bobby found himself back
at Sweet Sensations.

This time there
was no sign of anyone running out of the shop as he pulled into the parking
lot. He eased into an open space near the door and shut off the engine, taking
a deep breath as he stared at the building.

Somehow he was
more nervous than he’d been last night. Yesterday he’d been psyched, excited
about the possibilities and the chance to finally make something happen with
Nina. But their conversation at the hospital yesterday had unnerved him, her
words sticking with him through the rest of the night and into today.

It’s not the
same thing and you know it
.

Yeah, he did
know it. He hadn’t been able to dispute the words then and he couldn’t now.

Just the idea of
Nina having a baby,
their
baby... He’d thought about it once or twice,
just when the idea of kids had come up. He knew what it was like for guys who
weren’t able to be with their wives or girlfriends when they were giving birth,
and he’d known he would want to be there, even though there was no way he could
guarantee that. Not when he could be called away.

For the first
time he’d felt a small doubt that they’d be able to work it out, wondered if he
was wasting both their time...

Which was
exactly what he couldn’t do.

He leaned
forward in his seat and tried to shake off the feeling. He had to approach this
as a mission, one of the most important of his life. Somehow they would work it
out. He just had to get the job done.

Hard resolve
pounded through his veins. Yanking his key from the ignition, he climbed out of
the car and headed into the shop.