Breathless (4 page)

“Yeah, if you’re really that far apart there’s no
reason to drag it all out.” Georgia nodded and we were both quiet for a few
minutes.

“So why the hell don’t you have a boyfriend?” She
raised an eyebrow, grinning at me. “Not that it isn’t a good thing, but—I mean,
is it just that you don’t want one or…” I laughed.

“No, I’m definitely into guys and definitely into the
idea of dating.” I pressed my lips together, remembering the reason I wasn’t
dating—and the reason that I was so glad to be at college. “My mom’s kind of a
snob,” I said. “My dad, too. Though usually he’s not quite as bad as Mom is.”
Georgia tilted her head to the side, silently asking me to elaborate. “She was
always after me to date these like, country club boys—the kids of the families
she and Dad hang out with every weekend. People with money, you know? I kind of
got sick of all the pressure they were putting on me and just decided that I
wasn’t going to date until I was away from them. So here I am.” I shrugged and
grinned.

“Here you are, getting flirted with by Johnny Steel.”
Georgia lowered her voice dramatically when she said the name. Already, the
RA’s comment in the orientation meeting was a joke between us, and the fact
that we had both met the source of the comment made it even funnier.

“Ah, I’ll probably never see him again. You saw how
many people there were in the dining hall. What are the odds I’m going to end
up running into him again? Not that great.” We continued talking about our
classes and everything we’d seen on campus, moving the furniture around and
arranging things the way we wanted them, installing Gigi’s TV on the
entertainment center, and doing all those little things that make a room at
least a little bit like home.

We finally started to get exhausted; I knew the
different excitements of the day had drained me totally, and that was without
moving furniture around and unpacking. Georgia said goodnight, and I closed the
door to my bedroom, smiling to myself. It had been a good first day on campus,
all things considered. I was incredibly lucky that my roommate wasn’t some
wealthy snob or some airhead I couldn’t stand to be around. Eventually, I’d
know my way around campus and would get used to being surrounded by so many
people all the time.

I stripped out of my clothes and crawled into bed
without even bothering to change into pajamas. I smirked to myself as I reached
over to turn off the light in the room, thinking that already I had so much
more freedom than I was used to having, At home, I would never have thought of
sleeping naked. My mom had a tendency to open the door right after knocking,
without even waiting to hear me say “come in.” I definitely didn’t want to have
the awkward moment of her seeing me naked—I knew she would freak. But here in
the dorms, with my door safely locked behind me, in the dark, it didn’t matter.
No one was going to just barge into my room.

My bed was so comfortable that I should have fallen
right to sleep; instead I found my hands wandering over my naked body under the
covers, feeling myself up. It felt so weird, and yet so comfortable. As I
played with my breasts a little, jiggling them under the covers before I let my
hands wander a little lower, I couldn’t help thinking of Johnny. I knew I
shouldn’t. After all, like I’d told Gigi, there was practically no chance that
anything would ever happen with him—I probably wouldn’t even ever see him on
campus. He was an upperclassman, in totally different classes from mine, and on
a team. But I couldn’t stop myself remembering his sweet-looking, gorgeous
face. I remembered the sight of his hands, too—big, strong hands. I shivered,
biting my bottom lip while I thought about what it would feel like for him to
touch me with those big hands, cupping my breasts, moving down between my legs,
caressing me everywhere. I shook my head at myself, knowing I was being
ridiculous, but as I started to drop off to sleep, it was impossible not to
think about the look in his eyes when he’d introduced himself, the way he’d
laughed to his friends before that, the way he smiled at me, and how good it
probably would feel to have him right there with me.

The weekend ended faster than I would have guessed;
everyone was moved into their dorms, and even the upperclassmen were all on
campus. Georgia and I had another day of getting settled in. We were definitely
more than ready to start our classes, to see what it would be like. So when
Monday morning came around and I had to wake up for my first class, I was awake
even before my alarm went off. I took a quick shower and got dressed, agonizing
more than I would have wanted to admit to anyone over the choice of what to
wear to my first day of classes.
Jeez,
it’s not like the first day of school,
I told myself. “Get your act
together, Becky.” I shook my head and decided to go with a regular old t-shirt
and jeans, a cute pair of shoes, and my purse.

Georgia and I had bought our books the day before, and
I was more grateful than I had ever been in my life that my parents were
well-off. Before we’d set out for the campus, Dad had pulled me aside and put a
gold AmEx into my hands. “Now, the bills from this card are coming straight to
me, so don’t think I’m not going to know what you’re spending it on,” he had
told me. “But books are expensive, and you do deserve a little bit of fun—so as
long as you don’t go over-budget, I’m not going to look at things too closely.
But if you go over your budget, I’m going to make you find a way to pay for
it.”

My first class of the day was my English course, and
as I came out of the dorms, I saw dozens of other students making their way
across campus, hurrying to get to their classes—a few of them had obviously
already had a class today, and I shook my head, thinking to myself that it was
at least good that I hadn’t had to wake up even earlier. I stopped off in the
dining hall, knowing I had a little bit of time—not enough to sit down and have
breakfast, but enough time to grab something to eat and maybe some coffee. I’d
been so nervous and excited the night before that I had barely slept—I knew I
was going to need the caffeine in me for the math class that came afterward.

I grabbed a banana and some pre-toasted bread and
tucked it into my backpack carefully and poured myself a carry-away cup of
coffee. I was still feeling confident as I got out of the dining hall,
following the flow of students leaving and heading out to the other side of
campus where the different class buildings were. My English class was in
MC1012, which I had at least figured out was the
Marchman
building, named after some author who had gone to the school ages before and
then, when he had gotten wealthy selling books, had endowed the English
department. But I had no idea where the
Marchman
building was, and suddenly, the tiny campus seemed huge.

I wandered around, trying not to check the time too
often on my phone as I looked for any of the signs that could have told me
where I was on campus or where the different buildings were. I had plenty of
time, I told myself over and over again. I had left my room early. I sipped at
my coffee, trying to fight down the sense of rising panic that filled my head
as I wandered around without any clue at all which building I needed to be at.
I thought about going to the Admissions building, but that was all the way on
the other side of the campus—I would be late for sure if I did that.

I saw some other kids, obviously upperclassmen,
walking past me. “Hey,” I called out, keeping my voice as calm as possible.
“I’m—kind of new here, first day and all; could someone tell me where the
Marchman
building is?” They acted like they hadn’t heard
me, but I caught one of the girls—a sorority girl with one of the pins showing
her affiliation—grinning to herself as she turned away.

As I wandered around, trying to find a sign, a
guidepost, anything, and asking people if they knew where the building was, I
realized I was completely and totally lost. A bunch of the people I asked were
Freshmen like me, and had no clue that there even was a
Marchman
building; some of the just didn’t answer, one or two at least had enough
politeness to say that they were in a rush to get to their class and couldn’t
stop to help me. I was starting to lose any hope and felt humiliated by the
fact that I couldn’t even make it to my first class of the day.

“Becky!” I wheeled around at the sound of my name on a
slightly familiar voice, my heart pounding. I almost gasped as I saw the
source: Johnny was walking towards me, a smile on his face. Blood rushed into my
cheeks and I bit my bottom lip, taking a deep breath. Nothing could have
completed my humiliation more elegantly than for Johnny to see me being
completely and totally useless. “You look like you’re about to cry,” he said,
frowning slightly as he came closer to me.

“Just—a little frazzled,” I said, trying to smile and
brush the look off of my face. “I’m so useless; I can’t even find my first
class.” Johnny grinned.

“That’s nothing to cry about,” he said. He leaned in
closer to me and I saw his bright eyes sparkling. “Seriously, everyone who’s
ever been here has had a class they couldn’t find—hell, last year I spent most
of the first session of my
Chem
class trying to find
it. They’d moved it around three times before the semester even started.” He
pulled me to the side slightly, to let some of the other students pass. “So
what class are you going to?” I took a deep breath.

“It’s—
it’s
American
Literature to 1890, in the
Marchman
building.
MC1012.” Johnny’s eyes widened slightly and he looked around us.

“I hate to break it to you, Becky, but you are totally
in the wrong place.” I sighed, closing my eyes.

“Great.” Johnny patted me on the shoulder, giving my
hair a playful tweak.

“The good news is that I happen to know exactly where
that room is.” I looked up, hopeful. “Before you even ask: yes, I’ll take you
there.” I saw that he had a book bag slung over his shoulder.

“But you have class, don’t you? You could just tell me
how to get there…” I couldn’t say that I wouldn’t love to have Johnny walk me
to class, but I would have felt guilty if he got in trouble to do it. Johnny
shrugged.

“The prof won’t mind,” he told me. “Now come on—let’s
get you to your class before you’re late. If you’ve got Barrett, you want to
get off to a good start with her, and being late is something she hates.” He
put an arm over my shoulder and steered me into the thick of the students
moving along the walkway, pushing his way through a harried group and starting
off in the direction of the building in question. I felt relief flooding me. I
wasn’t going to be late; I was going to be just on time. Johnny was so sweet to
help me out.

As we walked, he joked with me, pointing out different
people he recognized in the crowd of students coming and going and murmuring
little comments about them. Such and such a person had gotten a reputation by
getting plastered the first week of classes and throwing up in one of the
introductory classes that all of the freshmen had to take, another person had
jumped up on one of the tables in the dining hall and proclaimed his love for
the girl he ended up dating seriously—little details that started to put me at
ease, all while we made our way over to the building where my class was going
to be. “And here is the
Marchman
building! Hall of
horrors.” He shuddered and grinned.

“Hey, I like English!” I countered. “It’s what I’m
majoring in, after all. I love books—I guess that makes me a nerd, but it’s
true.” Johnny laughed.

“If you’re a nerd, you’re at least a cute nerd. I’ve
just always been better at math.” I shook my head.

“I’m okay at it if I try really, really hard.” Johnny
led me towards the stairs and explained that the elevators in the
Marchman
building were cranky—it was easier just to take
the stairs up, instead of waiting for the elevator to get there and possibly
ending up stuck for hours until one of the maintenance staff was able to get it
running again. “You know,” I said as we came to the floor my class was on,
feeling daring—and nervous all at the same time. “If you needed like, help in
any of your English classes, I could lend a hand… I’m really grateful you’re
helping me out.” Johnny grinned.

“It’s nothing, but if you’re offering, I might take
you up on that. I never seem to be able to get my papers done on time.” He
shook his head. I had gotten the impression as he talked, and from how readily
he brushed off the possibility of getting in trouble for being late, that
Johnny Steel did whatever he wanted without anyone much telling him to stop.

He stopped at a classroom marked MC1012. “Here you
are—and you’ve got a minute or two before the Barrett gets here, even! How’s
that for luck?” I grinned, feeling like an idiot but not caring. “Hey, now that
I think about it: the frat I belong to is throwing a party soon—well, we throw
a lot of great parties. You should come out. First, best party of the year.” I
fought down the urge to make a face; the last thing I wanted was to go to a
frat party. I knew Johnny was too good to be true: of course he belonged to a
frat. There had to be at least a little something wrong with him. But if he was
in a frat, it couldn’t be that bad; and I had been to plenty of parties—they
were all the same at the bottom of it. He had been so sweet and kind to me that
I couldn’t resist, even if I was doubtful about how much fun I would have. I
told him that I would definitely come by to check it out and slipped into my
classroom feeling like I was walking on air. I watched Johnny start off back to
the stairs and took my seat, still smiling to myself at the luck I was having.