Brian Friel Plays 1 (9 page)

LIZZY
:
Anyhow, there we are, all sitting like stuffed ducks in the front seat – Una and Agnes and Rose and Mother and me – you know – and mother dickied up in her good black shawl and everything – and up at the altar rails there’s Maire all by herself and her shoulders are sorta working – you know – and you couldn’t tell whether she was crying or giggling – she was a helluva one for giggling – but maybe she
was crying that morning – I don’t know –

CON
:
Get on with the story, honey.

LIZZY
:
(
With
dignity
) Would you please desist from bustin’ in on me?

(
CON
spreads
his
hands
in
resignation
.)

LIZZY
:
But listen to this – this’ll kill you – Mother’s here, see? And Agnes is here and I’m here. And Agnes leans across Mother to me – you know – and she says in this helluva loud voice – she says – (
Laughs
) – this really does kill me – she says – in this whisper of hers – and you know the size of Bailtefree chapel; couldn’t swing a cat in that place –
(
Suddenly
anxious.
) That chapel’s still there, isn’t it? It hasn’t fell down or nothing, has it?

CON
:
(
Dryly
) Unless it fell down within the last couple of hours. We drove up there this morning. Remember?

LIZZY
:
(
Relieved
) Yeah. So we did. Fine place. Made me feel kinda – you know – what the hell was I talking about?

BEN
:
Agnes leaned over to you and said –

(
LIZZY
puts
her
arm
around
him
and
kisses
the
crown
of
his
head
.)

LIZZY
:
Thanks, Ben. A great friend with a great memory! I’ll tell you, Gar, Ben Burton’s one hundred per cent. The first and best friend we made when we went out. (
To
CON
.) Right, honey?

CON
:
Right.

LIZZY
:
Way back in ’37.

CON
:
’38.

LIZZY
:
(
Loudly
) October 23rd, 19 and 37 we sailed for the United States of America, (
CON
spreads
his
hands
.) Nothing in our pockets. No job to go to. And what does Ben do?

CON
:
A guy in a million.

LIZZY
:
He gives us this apartment. He gives us dough. He gives us three meals a day – until Bonzo (
CON
) finally gets himself this job. Looks after us like we were his own skin and bone. Right, honey?

CON
:
Right.

LIZZY
:
So don’t let nobody say nothing against Ben Burton. Then when he (
CON
) gets this job in this downtown store –

CON
:
First job was with the construction company.

LIZZY
:
Would you please desist? (
CON
spreads
hands
.) His first job was with Young and Pecks, hauling out them packing cases and things; and then he moved to the construction company, and
then
we got a place of our own.

PUBLIC
:
You were telling us about that morning.

LIZZY
:
What’s he talking about?

PUBLIC
:
The day my father and mother got married.

LIZZY
:
That day! Wasn’t that something? With the wind howling and the rain slashing about! And Mother, poor Mother, may God be good to her, she thought that just because Maire got this guy with a big store we should all of got guys with big stores. And poor Maire – we were so alike in every way, Maire and me. But he was good to her. I’ll say that for S.B. O’Donnell – real good to her. Where the hell is he anyhow? Why will S.B. O’Donnell, my brother-in-law, not meet me?

CON
:
He (
PUBLIC
) told you – he’s away at a wedding.

LIZZY
:
What wedding?

CON
:
Some local girl and some Dublin doc.

LIZZY
:
What local girl? You think I’m a stranger here or something?

CON
:
(
To
PUBLIC
) What local girl?

PUBLIC
:
Senator Doogan’s daughter.

PRIVATE
:
Kathy.

LIZZY
:
Never heard of him. Some Johnny-hop-up. When did they start having senators about this place for Gawd’s sakes?

BEN
:
(
To
PUBLIC
) You have a senate in Dublin, just like our Senate, don’t you?

LIZZY
:
Don’t you start telling me nothing about my own country, Ben. You got your own problems to look after. Just you leave me to manage this place, okay?

BEN
:
Sorry, Elise.

LIZZY
:
Ben! (
She
kisses
the
top
of
his
head
.) Only that I’m a good Irish-American Catholic – (
To
PUBLIC
) and believe me, they don’t come much better than that-and only that I’m stuck with Rudolph Valentino (
CON
) I’d take a chance with Ben Burton any day (
Kisses
him
again
.) black Lutheran and all that he is.

(
MADGE
appears
at
the
door
of
the
shop.
She
refuses
to
look
at
the
visitors.
Her
face
is
tight
with
disapproval.
Her
accent
is
very
precise
.)

MADGE
:
Are there any
Clarions
to spare or are they all ordered?

PUBLIC
:
They’re all ordered, Madge.

LIZZY
:
Doing big deals out there, honey, huh?

MADGE
:
Thank you, Gareth.

(
MADGE
withdraws
.)

LIZZY
:
‘Thank you, Gareth!’

(
She
giggles
to
herself
.)

CON
:
Honey! (
To
PUBLIC
) You’ll think about what we were discussing?

PUBLIC
:
I will, Uncle Con.

CON
:
The job’s as good as you’ll get and we’d be proud to have you.

LIZZY
:
Don’t force him.

CON
:
I’m not forcing him. I’m only telling him.

LIZZY
:
Well now you’ve told him – a dozen times. So now desist, will you?

(
CON
spreads
his
hands.
)

PUBLIC
:
I will think about it. Really.

LIZZY
:
Sure! Sure! Typical Irish! He will think about it! And while he’s thinking about it the store falls in about his head! What age are you? Twenty-four? Twenty-five? What are you waiting for? For S.B. to run away to sea? Until the weather gets better?

CON
:
Honey!

LIZZY
:
I’m talking straight to the kid! He’s Maire’s boy and I’ve got an interest in him – the only nephew I have. (
To
BEN
.) Am I right or am I wrong?

BEN
:
I’m still up in Bailtefree chapel.

LIZZY
: Where? (
Confidentially
to
CON
) Give him no more to drink. (
Patiently
to
BEN
) You’re sitting in the home of S.B. O’Donnell and my deceased sister, Maire, Ben.

CON
:
You were telling us a story about the morning they got married, honey, in Bailtefree chapel.

LIZZY
:
Yeah, I know, I know, but you keep busting in on me.

PUBLIC
:
You were about to tell us what Agnes whispered to you.

LIZZY
:
(
Crying
) Poor Aggie – dead. Maire – dead. Rose, Una, Lizzy – dead – all gone – all dead and gone …

CON
:
Honey, you’re Lizzy.

LIZZY
:
So what?

CON
:
Honey, you’re not dead.

LIZZY
:
(
Regarding
CON
cautiously
) You gone senile all of a sudden? (
Confidentially
to
BEN
) Give him no more to drink. (
To
CON
) For Gawd’s sakes who says I’m dead?

BEN
:
You’re very much alive, Elise.

(
She
goes
to
him
and
gives
him
another
kiss.
)

LIZZY
:
Thank you, Ben. A great friend with a great intellect. Only one thing wrong with Ben Burton: he’s a black Baptist.

BEN
:
Just for the record, Gar, I’m Episcopalian.

LIZZY
:
Episcopalian – Lutheran – Baptist – what’s the difference? As our pastor, Father O’Flaherty, says – ‘My dear brethren,’ he says, ‘Let the whole cart-load of them, and the whole zoo of them, be to thee as the Pharisee and the publican.’

CON
:
Honey!

LIZZY
:
But he’s still the best friend we have. And we have many good, dear, kind friends in the US. Right, honey?

CON
:
Right.

LIZZY
:
But when it comes to holding a candle to Ben Burton – look – comparisons are – he’s not in the halfpenny place with them!

BEN
:
(
Laughing
)
Bang on, Elise!

LIZZY
:
Am I right or am I wrong?

CON
:
Honey!

LIZZY
:
(
To
PUBLIC
) And that’s why I say to you: America’s Gawd’s own country. Ben?

BEN
:
Don’t ask me. I was born there.

LIZZY
:
What d’ya mean – ‘Don’t ask me?’ I am asking you. He should come out or he should not – which is it?

BEN
:
It’s just another place to live, Elise: Ireland – America – what’s the difference?

LIZZY
:
You tell him, honey. You tell him the set-up we have.
(
Now
with
growing
urgency
,
to
PUBLIC
.) We have this ground-floor apartment, see, and a car that’s air-conditioned, and colour TV, and this big collection of all the Irish records you ever heard, and fifteen thousand bucks in Federal Bonds –

CON
:
Honey.

LIZZY
:
– and a deep freezer and – and – and a back yard with this great big cherry tree, and squirrels and night-owls and the smell of lavender in the spring and long summer evenings and snow at Christmas and a Christmas tree in the parlour and – and – and –

CON
:
Elise …

LIZZY
:
And it’s all so Gawd-awful because we have no one to share it with us …

(
She
begins
to
sob.
)

CON
:
(
Softly
)
It’s okay, honey, okay …

LIZZY
:
He’s my sister’s boy – the only child of five girls of us –

BEN
:
I’ll get the car round the front.

(
BEN
goes
off
through
the
scullery
.)

LIZZY
:
– and we spent a fortune on doctors, didn’t we, Connie, but it was no good, and then I says to him (
CON
), ‘We’ll go home to Ireland,’ I says, ‘and Maire’s boy, we’ll offer him everything we have –’

PRIVATE
:
(
Terrified
)
No. No.

LIZZY
:
‘– everything, and maybe we could coax him – you know – ’ maybe it was sorta bribery – I dunno – but he would have everything we ever gathered –

PRIVATE
:
Keep it! Keep it!

LIZZY
:
– and all the love we had in us –

PRIVATE
:
No! No!

CON
:
Honey, we’ve a long drive back to the hotel.

LIZZY
:
(
Trying
to
control
herself
)
That was always the kind of us Gallagher girls, wasn’t it … either laughing or crying … you know, sorta silly and impetuous, shooting our big mouths off, talking too much, not like the O’Donnells – you know – kinda cold –