Authors: John McCann,Monica Sweeney,Becky Thomas
LEONATO
This says she now when she is beginning to write to him; for she’ll be up twenty times a night, and there will she sit in her smock till she have writ a sheet of paper: my daughter tells us all.
CLAUDIO
Now you talk of a sheet of paper, I remember a pretty jest your daughter told us of.
LEONATO
O, when she had writ it and was reading it over, she found Benedick and Beatrice between the sheet?
CLAUDIO
That.
LEONATO
O, she tore the letter into a thousand halfpence; railed at herself, that she should be so immodest to write to one that she knew would flout her; “I measure him,” says she, “by my own spirit; for I should flout him, if he writ to me; yea, though I love him, I should.”
CLAUDIO
Then down upon her knees she falls, weeps, sobs, beats her heart, tears her hair, prays, curses; “O sweet Benedick! God give me patience!”
LEONATO
She doth indeed; my daughter says so: and the ecstasy hath so much overborne her that my daughter is sometime afeared she will do a desperate outrage to herself: it is very true.
DON PEDRO
It were good that Benedick knew of it by some other, if she will not discover it.
CLAUDIO
To what end? He would make but a sport of it and torment the poor lady worse.
DON PEDRO
An he should, it were an alms to hang him. She’s an excellent sweet lady; and, out of all suspicion, she is virtuous.
CLAUDIO
And she is exceeding wise.
DON PEDRO
In every thing but in loving Benedick.
LEONATO
O, my lord, wisdom and blood combating in so tender a body, we have ten proofs to one that blood hath the victory. I am sorry for her, as I have just cause, being her uncle and her guardian.
DON PEDRO
I would she had bestowed this dotage on me: I would have daffed all other respects and made her half myself. I pray you, tell Benedick of it, and hear what a’ will say.
LEONATO
Were it good, think you?
CLAUDIO
Hero thinks surely she will die; for she says she will die, if he love her not, and she will die, ere she make her love known, and she will die, if he woo her, rather than she will bate one breath of her accustomed crossness.
DON PEDRO
She doth well: if she should make tender of her love, ’tis very possible he’ll scorn it; for the man, as you know all, hath a contemptible spirit.
CLAUDIO
He is a very proper man.
DON PEDRO
He hath indeed a good outward happiness.
CLAUDIO
Before God! and, in my mind, very wise.
DON PEDRO
He doth indeed show some sparks that are like wit.
CLAUDIO
And I take him to be valiant.
DON PEDRO
As Hector, I assure you: and in the managing of quarrels you may say he is wise; for either he avoids them with great discretion, or undertakes them with a most Christian-like fear.
LEONATO
If he do fear God, a’ must necessarily keep peace: if he break the peace, he ought to enter into a quarrel with fear and trembling.
DON PEDRO
And so will he do; for the man doth fear God, howsoever it seems not in him by some large jests he will make. Well I am sorry for your niece. Shall we go seek Benedick, and tell him of her love?
CLAUDIO
Never tell him, my lord: let her wear it out with good counsel.
LEONATO
Nay, that’s impossible: she may wear her heart out first.