Authors: Carré White
“It’s the color of your eyes,” said his mother. “We don’t see blue eyes here. Mine are hazel.”
Silas groaned, scowling. “Ouch. This blasted thing.” He gripped his side.
The whiskey had worn off, and now he felt pain. “Have some water.” I reached for the urn, holding it up for him.
“Thank you, Saffron.”
“I’ll see about food,” said Daisy. “I’ve dried deer meat you can have.”
She walked away, but her husband stayed, staring at us, his form imposing and fierce-looking in breechcloths and leather leggings. His long, black hair hung over muscled shoulders. Micah spoke again, capturing his attention, and they bantered for a while, the brave’s stern features softening. He came and sat by Micah, which surprised me, but Mr. Blaylock had the advantage, because he knew the language and he practiced the art of diplomacy.
Although these people had murdered most of our hunting party, revenge would be impossible to achieve, because they outnumbered us and we lacked weapons. We would have to humble ourselves to gain freedom. If we survived, the news of these events would be passed on to the authorities, and the cavalry would step in and seek retribution. Seeing the Utes in their camp and Daisy with her husband and family gave me an entirely different perspective on things, but the fact remained that we had been ambushed without reason, and our men had paid the ultimate price.
When Daisy returned, she brought a basket with her, treading quietly in soft-looking moccasins towards our fire pit. “This should fill you up. Goodness, it’s been so long since I’ve spoken English. It sounds strange to my ears.”
Micah and To-Quo-Ne continued to prattle, laughing and gesturing, as if they had been friends for years. Micah, sensing my appraisal, glanced at me, saying, “I told him we have no quarrel with the Indians. I made it clear we weren’t here to take lands or cause war. I don’t know how much of a difference that’ll make, though.”
“We should escape,” murmured Silas. “I got a plan.”
“You can barely walk,” I whispered. “That would be impossible.”
“Staying here, waiting on some filthy Indian to decide my fate is absurd.” He spat. “I’ve better things to do.”
“You’re welcome to the food.” Daisy eyed me. “You can wash up by the river, if you want.”
I got the impression she wished to speak to me alone. “All right.” Would they even allow us to go off together? Getting to my feet, I approached my friend, and she took my hand. “Will you get in trouble for this?”
“No. They trust me. They trust my judgment.”
“That’s nice.”
“It was hard won.”
Wickiups spotted the camp, the brush-covered huts blending in with the environment. The inhabitants tended fires and watched over children, while Indians came and went, each person having some sort of job to do. The stream in question ran swiftly, and there were people in it, bathing and fishing. We came to the edge, standing upon rocks, the water smelling of fish. I bent to wash my face and arms, scrubbing as much dust off as possible.
“You’re terribly filthy,” said Daisy.
“We were caught in an avalanche. Your people caused it.”
“I’m sorry five of your party died. I didn’t know that, but it’s hardly surprising. We have the right to protect our own.”
“And now we’ll have lots of widows and orphans in Fern Valley, including our esteemed sheriff. If we’re allowed to go, that’s the one thing I dread, having to tell them what happened. I doubt we’ll even be able to bring the bodies back for a decent burial.” Bitterness laced my tone.
“You knew the risks entering the forest. Our camp won’t be here for long, especially after the massacre. We know the Army will come now. It’s one of many things our chief is in council for.”
I sat back on my heels. “I don’t want to argue about this, Daisy. I’m sick to my stomach about everything’s that happened today. I’m praying to God we can go home. My father and sister and brother are waiting for me. I have a life to get back to.”
“Who is this Silas person? Is he your beau?”
“He was. I ended it with him yesterday.”
“Good. I don’t like him in the least. The other’s in love with you.”
I blinked. “H-how do you know that?”
“He said so. He spoke about it with my husband.”
“I had no clue.” Micah had admitted being in love with me? This knowledge left me strangely pleased, something sweet fluttering in my belly.
“He hasn’t a good thing to say about the blonde.”
“I suppose not. Silas can rub people the wrong way, but it doesn’t really matter at the moment. I’ve more important things to worry about.”
“I hope our chief releases you. Having Micah, who speaks our language, might just be the key to your release. He’s made it clear you were only a hunting party. You’ve done us a service too, because that bear had been causing trouble.”
“There were more than one. The female attacked our farmhouse, killing my maid and an Indian friend. We’ve had many instances such as this. People I know are gone now. We were only trying to protect our community.” Tears flooded my eyes at the thought of all the families that would be devastated by the loss of their husbands and fathers. “I’m trying to stay strong, but whenever I think about all we’ve lost and what it means, it’s hard.”
She placed her arm over my shoulder. “This is not an easy life. If you had seen how the Comanche treated me, you would’ve been shocked. When they first took me, all I could think about was how you had escaped. How you were warm and comfortable in your wagon with your family, while mine had been murdered. I was black and blue from being beaten for months and starving and filthy. I thought my spirit had been broken, and, perhaps, it was, but I endured. Then I met To-Quo-Ne, and he saved me. I’d been a shell of a person before. I had splintered into a thousand little pieces, and he put them all back together again.”
I smiled through the tears. “I’m so sorry, Daisy. You’ve had it far worse than I could ever imagine. I’m thankful you’re alive and well. I can see the respect your husband has for you. I hope you live a long and happy life together. I shall hold you in my prayers. I’ve prayed for you for years. I always worried about you. I felt guilt for surviving when so many perished. The Lord hasn’t taken me yet. I should’ve died on the mountain today, but I’m still here.” I said vehemently, “I don’t want to die just yet. There’s so much I have to do. I long for children, just like your little Tabby. Your son is sweet and adorable. I think you’re terribly fortunate. You have everything I want.”
It looked like she fought back tears. “I held resentment in my heart over what happened. I confess, I cursed God. I thought He had forsaken me. He had taken everything I held dear in one fell swoop, but I have since had a change of heart. I don’t pretend to know why some live or why some die. It’s the roll of the dice, I suppose, or bad luck. God can’t prevent tragedies, but He has given me the strength to get back on my feet again. I know you shall overcome whatever obstacles are in your path, Saffron. We’re kindred spirits, after all. I recognize myself in you. We’re both survivors.”
“Indeed we are.” I wiped away tears, sniffing. “I shall hold my head up high. I’ve done the best I could. I don’t think I could’ve done better.”
“Will you marry this Micah fella?”
“Goodness, you ask some strange questions. I haven’t even courted him. He hasn’t asked. It’s far too soon for that. I’ve other things on my mind. Once I’m home again and free, I’ll consider it.”
“Then I wish you a long and happy life too, Saffron. I’m sorry I resented you. It was hard not to feel jealously when I was starving and cold, but I was younger then. The worst thing that had ever happened to me before we came west was the passing of my grandmother and the death of a family pet. That hardly prepared me for the Comanche.”
“You tell a sobering tale. It’s something I won’t ever forget.”
“Are you hungry?”
“A little. We ate well last night. I’m anxious about what will happen now.”
“Our chief does not decide things quickly. I’d expect an answer in the morning.”
“All right. Then I won’t worry about it tonight.”
“Let’s go back. Tabby will want to eat soon. His appetite is quite hardy. He eats so much sometimes, I think he has a hollow leg.”
I laughed at that.
The afternoon slipped away, the camp shrouded in shadows, while the aroma of cooking filled the air. Daisy and her family returned to their wickiup, while Micah, Silas, and I sat around the fire, grateful for the warmth, as a chill had set in. Because Silas had finished the whiskey, there was nothing left with which to clean his wound. He remained prone in the dirt and muttering occasionally, cursing the Indians for trying to kill him.
We had eaten the dried meat, grateful to have something in our bellies. I sat across the fire from Micah, who appeared contemplative, staring my way. “Come sit with me.” He patted the space beside him.
“All right.” I got to my feet.
“How are you?”
“I’m fine.” I sighed. “I had a good talk with Daisy. It put everything into perspective.”
“I need to talk to you, Saffron.”
“Daisy said you told her husband you’re in love with me.” I held my breath, waiting for his denial, but he remained silent for what seemed like an eternity. “Micah?”
He took my hand, bringing it to his lips. “It’s true. I love you. I wish nothing more than our freedom, so I can take you home and marry you.”
My mouth fell open.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Bluish, yellow flames leapt from the logs in the fire pit, while crickets resonated within the foliage around us. The strange, yet intriguing language of Ute conversations rang out from the various wickiups. The evening had ended on a peaceful note, although we still awaited our fate. The chief had been in consultation for hours now, not having come to a decision yet. I sat with Micah, holding his hand and knowing my life would never be the same again—if I survived this kidnapping.
“Will you marry me?”
I tried not to smile, pleased by his forthright approach. “Most men ask to court a woman first. You’ve jumped straight to the finish.”
“I’ve no need to court you to know my own mind, Saffron. I adore you. I have from the moment we met. I want nothing but your happiness, and I’m prepared to lay down my life to give it to you. I’d do whatever you want me to, if you agree to marry me.”
“Oh, gracious.”
“Is that a yes?” He looked hopeful.
“My father would want me to wait.”
“Let’s ask him then. I’ve done nothing proper yet. I haven’t even spoken to him about it, but I have a feeling he wouldn’t mind. I like your pa.”
“He likes you too.” He held my hand, while we sat together, with Silas across the other side of the fire, sleeping. “I’d marry you, if we were free. I know my mind too. I’ve been trying to deny it, but it’s been there from the start.”
He grasped my face, staring into my eyes. “You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”
“Oh, Micah.”
Then, without another word, he pressed his lips to mine, gently encouraging me to respond, and I did by wrapping my arms around his neck. The sweetness of the kiss lingered, while the embrace felt safe and comforting, his lips soft and urgent. He moaned against my mouth, grasping me tighter, while my head spun with pleasure, my body delighting in the closeness, not wanting it to end.
He broke free then, breathing heavily, his chest rising and falling. “I hope we’re released tomorrow. I long to take you home.”
“I can’t wait to be your wife.”
“My thinking exactly.”
I giggled, “I shouldn’t feel this happy after everything that’s happened. Now I’m guilty.”
“We’ve every right to happiness. Weeks ago, I felt this strange pull to come to Fern Valley. After I met you, I knew. I was always supposed to find you. I’m supposed to be with you.”
“And I’ve been nothing but blind. I thought Silas was the one for me, but I ignored his flaws time and again, wanting to only see who I thought he was. Pa was right. He told me I would return from the mountains a changed woman. I don’t feel even remotely the same. It would be a shame if they killed us. I’ve only just begun to see things clearly.” I gazed at Micah. “I love you so. I can’t bear the thought of losing you now.”
He kissed my cheek. “You won’t. I’ve done my diplomatic best to explain everything to To-Quo-Ne. I saw him enter the chief’s hut a while ago. He’s still in there. I’m certain he’s imparting everything I said to him. Believe it or not, these people are reasonable. They’re discussing things in detail, and they shall make the right decision. Whatever it is, good or bad, we’ll have to honor it.”
This might be our last night alive. “I feel helpless.”
“It’s not ideal,” he admitted grimly. “We have these few hours.” He kissed my hand. “I’m grateful to be here with you. If this is all I’m given, I won’t waste it.”
“Me either.”
We sat together, while the fire crackled and popped and Indians came and went casting interested looks in our direction. It was rather obvious we were being watched, and, although I longed for freedom, I knew trying to escape would be suicide. A short while later, after To-Quo-Ne emerged from the chief’s hut, we were escorted to a wickiup, which sat in the middle of camp. Another family, who took a hut further out, had vacated it. It was clear they wanted to keep an eye on us, not trusting we would not try to escape. There was a fire here and a buffalo hide on the floor with the pelt of some animal nearby for a blanket.
We encouraged Silas to stand and walk, although he groaned in pain. He had cursed up a blue streak, shuffling through camp angrily. He quieted after being helped into the wickiup, falling asleep within moments. I sat by the fire with Micah, sharing an urn of water and talking about our plans for the future, but would there even be a future?
“Then you wouldn’t be adverse to farming?” I asked.
“No.”
“Won’t you miss the freedom of being a trapper?”
“Not at all. I’ve done it long enough.”
A baby cried in the distance, the sound echoing. “Pa would help us build a house. I don’t expect anything as fine as what we have now, but something small would work. Ma came from money. Most of that is spent now, though.”