Bridesmaid Lotto (3 page)

“Josie! Of course you can. You have to promise to tell me every single, tiny detail of everything wedding related.”

“But what about work?”

“What about work? People are Bridesmaids all the time and it doesn’t interfere with their work. And it’s not like you’ll have to buy anything. I’m sure the dresses will be taken care of. Oh my God, the dresses. Oh Josie! You’re going to look so amazing!”

Ugh. “You know how much I hate wearing dresses,” I reminded her.

“But I don’t know why. You look so good in them.”

“Pfft. Whatever.”

“So… are you going to do it? It’s the opportunity of a lifetime.” She was bouncing up and down on the couch and clasping her hands.

“Why does everybody keep using that word? It certainly doesn’t feel like an opportunity.”

“Well, even if you don’t think so, at the very least, you’ll be going on your trip once you’re done.”

“I wonder how long this is all going to take. I hope they aren’t going to have, like a three year engagement or something.”

“Oh right, I guess they haven’t set a date yet, have they?”

“I don’t know. I guess I’ll do it?” I said, phrasing it more like a question than a statement.

“Yes!” Calla yelled. She jumped up and gave me a big hug. “I’ll help you with whatever you need.”

“You’ll have to. I’ll never get through this without your help, especially if my mother’s got her nose in it. Oh God. She’s going to have her nose in it isn’t she?”

“Yes.”

“Crap.”

“But don’t worry. I’ll get you through it. The only thing you’ll have to worry about is how not to let yourself get a big head.”

“Thanks a lot,” I said and shoved her lightly.

“You think I’m kidding, but every girl in this city is going to be jealous of you. Imagine what that will do to your ego.”

“I’m sure I’ll be fine. Remember, I’m the biggest dork on the planet.”

“Well, not
quite
the biggest,” she said. “Seriously though, I was totally thinking about this when I was hoping I would win.”

“Really, you were really that excited about it?”

“It’s the only thing I’ve thought about since we heard the announcement.”

“Really? Shit, I’m so sorry it wasn’t you. You deserve it so much more than me.”

“Oh shush. That’s not true and you know it.”

I shook my head. “Wow. I’m really gonna do this,” I said.

Calla nodded and flashed me a huge smile.

“I think I need to go to bed. I can’t believe I have to go to work tomorrow. Oh geez, everyone’s going to be hassling me to no end.”

# # #

The next morning I woke up unsure if it wasn’t all a dream. But as I made my way to the door and reached for my morning paper, it hit me again. Like a sucker punch.

I stared up at myself from page one.

“Front page. Christ. Why couldn’t she at least have found a halfway decent picture,” I groaned to myself.

I dreaded walking out the front door. The answering machine was blinking the number fifteen. Ugh. Fifteen messages. I pretended they didn’t exist as I sipped my coffee.

I’d never felt so exposed as I did on my way to work. People everywhere were staring and pointing and double checking their newspapers as I passed. I couldn’t believe what a spectacle this whole Bridesmaid Lotto thing had become. I’d kind of hoped that once the announcement was made, the city would stop obsessing about it all.

Wrong.

“Hello Miss Famous,” Matt said as I stepped into the office.

“Hi Mattie,” I said. “And very funny.”

“What do you mean funny?” he said. “You’re on the front page of the paper. Of course you’re famous. And this is only the beginning!”

“Ugh. Don’t tell me that.”

“And why didn’t you tell me you were entering,” he scolded. “You can imagine how stunned I was, telling all my friends how perfect you’d be, but refused to enter, and then there you were. Staring at is from TV land. I swear, I nearly lost it, it was so embarrassing.”

“You were embarrassed? How would you like to have your ugly, mug-shot-lookin’ yearbook photo plastered all over the TV, not to mention on every street corner in the city?”

“Oh yeah, real tough. You know I’d die to be on the front page of the paper! What I wouldn’t give to be the one hobnobbing with the rich and famous.”

“Maybe it’ll all die down in a few days,” I said, hopeful.

But the mail clerk that stopped several feet away to stare made me think that maybe I was kidding myself. I gave her wave.

“You just keep telling yourself that,” Mattie said. “This is only going to get bigger and bigger.”

“I’ve got work to do,” I said, making a face and walking away. I rushed to my cubicle and ducked as low as possible, afraid of what I might do if one more person stopped to gawk at me.

“Trip to Europe, trip to Europe,” I chanted to myself. “Keep your eye on the prize.”

I was about to pick up the phone when my boss popped his head into my cubicle.

“Saw you in the paper this morning.”

Oh God. “Um, yeah.”

“Look, what you do on your time is none of my business, but you should know that I don’t want this little… thing,” he said, waving his hand, “to affect your work, okay? I can’t have my employees running around expecting some sort of special treatment just because they landed on the front page of the paper once.”

“Um, yeah. No problem Don. It won’t affect my work, I promise. And I’m sure it will all die down in a day or two.”

He nodded. “Good. Everybody around here is way too distracted over something so ridiculous.” He walked away.

Being called ridiculous just made picking up the phone and listening to my messages that much harder. But an hour later, I’d finally finished listening to all the well wishes and I begrudgingly had to admit, I was feeling pretty good about myself by the end of it all. Pretty much everyone I knew had called to tell me how cute I would look standing beside Jake Hall.

Oh God. Jake Hall. How am I going to meet him without falling all over myself?

Of course, as I’d listened to the messages, I immediately Googled him and clicked on the first page listed. The screen lit up with a head shot of my completely secret, never tell a soul, movie star crush.

Jake Hall. Sigh. I am actually going to meet him. I am actually going to spend time with him. I am actually going to make him fall in love with me!

My screensaver kicked in and thrust me back into reality. “Good Lord, Josie,” I scolded myself. “What are you thinking? You are not going to make him fall in love with you. You are not even going to get him to look in your direction.”

I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe Calla was right. Maybe I could start a journal to keep myself grounded. I mean, not that there’s really that much danger in my head getting too big. I mean, no matter what Calla says, I am pretty much the hugest dork on the planet.

I pulled out a small notebook from my office supply stash that would fit nicely into my purse.

Dear Disaster Diary,

My name is Josephine McMaster. Josie for short. ‘McMaster the Disaster’ for those of you whom I had the distinct privilege to go to high school with. That pretty much says it all. People always told me how pretty I was, that I could be a model. Of course, that doesn’t do you much good when you walk around with a booger hangin’ out of your nose, or toilet paper stuck to your shoe, or trip over… well, nothing. I know, cliché, but all actual events. Somehow I’ve managed to escape my 26 years without having spinach embarrassingly stuck in my teeth.

I think.

Yes. Better. If I ever thought I might be starting to change, I would pull out my book and remind myself just how excruciatingly human I really was. I wrote Disaster Diary at the top of the page and underlined it.

Twice.

~ 3 ~

I clicked on my email hoping to find a nice little joke or encouraging note from Calla—writing in the disaster diary was kind of depressing—but instead I found a new address in the inbox,
[email protected]
.

I gasped. Then looked around to make sure nobody had seen me. My first wedding email. It kind of sickened me to realize that I was actually starting to come around to the idea of being a Bridesmaid for Emma VanHorn. I mean, I would be hanging out with the New York glitterati. I might, for a short time even become one of them. What if, even after the wedding was over, my fifteen minutes of fame continued on? What if
I
became the glitterati!

Oh Lord. Get out the notebook, you’re going insane.

I rolled my eyes and opened the email.

Dear Rebecca, Bobbi Lynne, Jennifer, and Josephine,

First off, I’d like to congratulate you all on becoming my Bridesmaids! This is the first of many weekly update emails that you all will receive in your journey as my attendants. I hope to hear regular updates from your end as well. I just wanted to send a quick good luck to you all, but please remember, while we all wish Jake the utmost happiness, always keep in mind what this day is truly about, a celebration of love between my fiancé and myself. In one week’s time you will receive your initiation package that will answer any remaining questions you may have.

Please find the attached forms which you are required to fill out. You may need assistance with some of the measurements.

Also attached is your invitation to our engagement party which is being held this weekend. You will need to print it and have it with you the evening of the party as it is closed to the general public. It is a formal occasion, so dress appropriately, and please do try to look your best as the press will be in attendance. I will be wearing red, so I would appreciate if you all would refrain from doing the same.

In conclusion, congratulations, and I look forward to meeting all of you at the engagement party.

Your bride,

Emma VanHorn

A party already? And formal attire? I couldn’t believe it. How much was this wedding actually going to cost me? I certainly didn’t have the budget for a formal gown by the weekend!

I groaned out loud. Which of course made Mattie to lean back in his chair and peek into my cubicle.

“What’s wrong gorgeous? Fame not all it’s cracked up to be?”

I rolled my eyes. “Come in here, you have got to see this.”

He jumped up, always willing to take an unscheduled break, and stood behind me. He mumbled quietly aloud as he read the email.

He sighed. “You are so lucky.”

“Lucky? I have to find something to wear to this party
this weekend
. I don’t have the cash for that!” I spun around to face him.

Mattie shook his head and put his hands on his hips. “Don’t you worry for a second, Mattie’s here. I am officially appointing myself your personal consultant for the duration of this magical experience.”

“Oh yeah. Magical. I’m going to magically watch the funds from my bank account disappear.”

“I told you not to worry didn’t I?” he said. “You’re coming with me after work. We are going to find you something gorgeous. And cheap.”

He walked away exaggerating the flamboyancy of his walk even more.

“How are you going to find something that I can afford?”

“Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Ye of little faith. You will see my dear, you will see.”

I couldn’t figure out how he was going to pull it off, but I had no other choice but to put my faith in Mattie. I quickly checked my bank account. Three hundred and sixty eight dollars. And I still had to get through a week and a half before my next paycheck. Crap. Mattie better know what he’s doing.

Although I suppose I could dip into my travel savings a little since mother has agreed to pay for the trip. Hmm. With a little miracle from Mattie, maybe this could work after all.

# # #

“You are going to look even more gorgeous than usual darling,” Mattie said, rattling off an address I didn’t know to the cab driver.

“I’m dying here Mattie. Where the heck are you taking me?”

“Don’t be so anxious. It doesn’t become you,” he said.

“Thanks a lot.”

“Oh, don’t worry. I’m here for you as more than just a fashion advisor. I come complete with lessons on manners, how-to makeup tips, as well as with a full-fledged hair stylist.”

“You have a full-fledged hairstylist at your disposal?”

“No.” He looked at me like I was the world’s largest moron, which given the situation, might be true. “
I
am a full-fledged stylist, and
I
am at your disposal.”