Bring on the Rain (38 page)

“
He’s staying drunk most the
time, passing out.”

She said, “I'm sorry about
that.”

“
He screwed up.” Mitch
shrugged. “I wanted to beat his ass too. Brook was a sweet girl, a
classy one. Coy had enough skanks when he was sowing wild oats. In
my opinion, he could have resisted a bit harder.”

But then, Mitch selfishly did not want
Madeline pissed at him over it.

“
Can I get you a coffee?”
Jason inquired.

“
Something cold. Thank
you.”

He left, and Mitch murmured, “I didn’t
expect to see you until after Graduation. Figured you were pretty
stressed about everything.”

“
I didn’t intend to come
here till after, but…” She paused, and thanked Jason as he handed
her a soda.

“
Please, sit down you two.”
She glanced between them. “Mitch, I thought to have this
conversation in private, I thought I’d… I figured everything would
be right, the time, place, and all—“

Neither of them sat down. Mitch felt
his stomach tighten. There was a strange look to her face and she
was tense enough to shatter. “Jason can leave.”

She shook her head, looked at Jason.
“You’re probably going to see me fall apart here in a
moment.”

“
Shit.” He stared at her.
“What’s wrong? Madeline… For God sakes, you’re scaring the hell out
of us here.”

She sighed. Her hand shook as she set
the drink down. She looked at Mitch letting their gazes hold so
that he already felt something twist in his stomach.

“
You’re going to see a
person at the Graduation…. There’s going to be someone with me, who
has never been anywhere in this town, except my house. He’s come
only a few times, but he’s family.”

Mitch saw her trembling. His eyes never
left hers and he knew Jason was standing there watching them. “An
uncle? “ Mitch joked badly, fearing to hear it. Not sure why. Not
knowing what this was leading to.

“
No Mitch.” She reached up,
undid the locket, and handed it to him.

His hands shook as he opened it. Jason
came over, standing at his shoulder and looking at it, lying in his
palm.

There was a muted roaring in his head
as his eyes went over the picture. Mitch felt too much to speak,
shock, a sick kind of disbelief that just tore through him with too
many emotions attached. Like tails on a kite, it swirled. Until
Mitch could not even sense either of them around him.

When he finally raised his eyes, they
were wet. He hurt all over, but was numb at the same time. The
tears pooled and spilled.

Madeline was against the banister,
trembling and pale. Her voice gruff as she offered, “His name is
Max, Maxwell Lambert Griffin. He turns twenty in July. He lives in
Kentucky, does sports writing for a paper and photography…some
freelance stuff.”

His hand closed over the locket. His
breath just rushed out.

Jason stepped away.

“
He’s coming in this
evening, to…get answers from me. My aunt Gee Gee has been his
mother all this time. He was only told a few days back.”

Mitch handed the locket to her.
“Jason,” He stared at Madeline’s face. He hardly had enough air to
breathe. “Leave us, please.”

“
Dad, it’s my—”

“
Goddammit!” Mitch rasped,
jerking his gaze to him. “Leave us!”

Jason shook his head, swallowing. He
felt his own eyes damp. He went in the house.

“
I told Brook yesterday,”
Madeline admitted gruffly, then pleaded, “Mitch,
say…something.”

Mitch tried, twice he did. Finally, he
sat down and buried his face in his hands for a moment.

Madeline sat down too.

Rubbing his hands over his face, elbows
on his thighs, Mitch sat still, looking, unseeing at the porch
floor. Not really in his body as he asked, “Is he coming here
too?”

“
He doesn’t plan to. He says
it is up to you. I only broke the silence because of Dovie’s
legacy.” Madeline explained that to him. The packet he had asked
about. “He said he’s seeing me because I decided he should be
told.”

“
You know,” Mitch said with
difficulty. “All the lies this family told, all that shit. I know
it… and yet, I want to scream at you, Madeline— Why?
Why?”

She was crying. “Because, I had no one,
and nothing. I was utterly alone and heartbroken, out of my mind
with grief, and you were married.”

He hardly heard her. “Bud, did
he—”

“
He never knew. I went out
with him a couple of times, told him I was taking a trip. I had
Max, two months later…I wed him.”

“
Dovie— she knew, damn
her!”

“
She did. I don't know
how.”

Mitch looked up at her, shaking his
head asking, roughly, “Madeline, Why couldn’t you keep
him?”

“
I had no medical insurance.
Aunt Gee Gee gave me options, but having Max, was never in
question. He was born with a heart valve problem, and collapsed
lungs. He needed care I couldn’t afford. Aunt Gee Gee could.
“

She whispered, “I was twenty pounds
under weight and in a deep depression. I was in the hospital two
weeks and the attending doctor wanted to put me on medications.
Aunt Gee had to make decisions about Max, because I couldn’t. She
was a pediatric surgeon, and I was completely ignorant of half they
were telling me.”

She took a long breath, in and out, and
went on, “Thinking, what Jude, and Deena said was true, and how
Dovie hated me. I had nightmares about bringing him back here. I
was scared of Dovie. I became a nervous wreck, I— I had
breakdown.”

Mitch swallowed. “You married Bud,
why?”

“
As a shield. He was a
barrier I could put up here. I could be his wife, build a life, and
bury all this pain inside. Aunt Gee Gee kept me up to date on Max.
Eventually I had Brook. As you know, nothing worked with Bud. The
life I built was never real.”

“
Madeline, why didn’t you
tell me? Why not after the truth came out for us?”

“
Because… Because I have
been through hell these few weeks, and life has been dragging me in
circles. “

He stood up and walked over to the
banister.

She stood too and walked to the steps.
“I have to tell this all over again this evening. I don't know what
Max will do, I... He’s a grown man, and we have to let him do this
his way.”

“
Don't leave yet,” Mitch
told her, then walked into the house. He came out later, having
taken the time to explain to Jason, who was back on the porch. He
walked down to her Jeep.

“
I’m hurt,” Mitch, admitted
holding her gaze. “For him, for you, for me. I’ve got to—I’m angry
too.”

“
At me?”

“
Some,” he admitted. “Mostly
at my family.”

She stiffened and said, “I
understand.”

Mitch searched her face. “I’m angry,
because I have no rights. He’s grown up and I can’t…I used to look
at Jason and wish he were ours. And when you say…” He cussed and
looked away a moment.

“
Mitch.” She put her hand on
his arm.

Mitch looked at her again. “It’s like a
gut punch. It’s going to take some absorbing.”

Madeline dropped her hand and got into
the car. She held the wheel, staring out, rasping, “I can’t undo
anything.” She was crying brokenly, and started the engine. “I
can’t do everything right for everyone, dammit!” She jerked the car
in gear and spun out.

“
Madeline!” He tried to stop
her.

“
I'm sorry.” Blinded by
tears she sped toward home.

Mitch cursed seeing Jason running down
the steps. “Madeline’s crying. She’s driving too fast.”

Jason growled. “What the hell did you
say? You told me what she said! Dammit, Dad. She was broke and
alone and he was sick and Dammit…”

“
I didn’t say—”

Jason cut him off, “What did you
expect? For her to raise the kid here, with the way Dovie was? With
no money— and you married to Mom? Jesus Christ, Dad! I can’t
believe you. You weren’t so fucking noble yourself!” He turned and
went back up the steps.

Mitch stood there a moment, and then
followed him. “What do you expect me to feel, Jason? You know I
loved Madeline. I wanted you to be ours. I wanted my life, a son
with her, and to know I…I know. I know she had no money, no family,
she was scared. He was born with medical problems. She had a
breakdown. And…”

Mitch heaved, struggling, but a sob
escaped as he sat down on the porch edge. He buried his face in his
hands again, feeling like his head was exploding. “And it hurts,
just as damned much, knowing she went through that alone
too.”

Mitch gave up. He just sat there and
fell apart.

~*~

Jason closed his eyes, leaned his head
back, and heard the rough sounds coming from his dad. When he could
not stand it, he lowered his head and walked into the
house.

He went to the den and started making
phone calls. The first person he cussed out was Deena. Not giving
her time to breathe or speak. He called Jude next, and chewed him
out with more explicit words than he’d ever used with his uncle. He
got up, poured a drink, knocked it back, and started calmly calling
the whole Coburn clan.

~*~

Madeline arrived home safe. She was
half there when she realized she had to pull herself together for
Brook, and she had to face Max. Bawling and crying would be a cop
out. She had to take it. She had better use the few hours she had
left, steadying for it.

She parked and met Brook on the porch.
”Get me a coffee. Will you, sweetie?”

“
He’s upset?”

Madeline nodded. “I’ll tell you, but
I’ve got to sit down.”

Brook left, brewed her a cup of coffee,
then she brought it back. Madeline told her how it had gone, the
awful sound of his voice, and the look in his eyes…

Brook said, “You knew it wouldn’t be
easy.”

“
I did. I underestimated the
pain it would cause him.”

“
Are you going to be able to
face Max?”

“
I will. He deserves
answers. He knows the basic stuff, but about me and Mitch and how
it was, how Dovie was a…I don't know if anyone but you, maybe Ruby,
can know what I felt when I thought Mitch didn’t love me. Worse, I
thought he had said I was too unstable for him to break it off
with. It all came out of nowhere. One day we were everything and
the next…I was afraid Dovie would cause trouble for me if I had Max
here. As soon as I married your Dad too, I realized he wouldn’t
accept him. Sounds puny, I have to face those decisions now,
Brook.”

Brook hugged her. She rested her chin
on his shoulder. “Life sucks.”

“
It’s not getting any
easier, that’s for sure.” Madeline patted her cheek. “I’m needing
quiet time, okay?”

“
Yep. I’m going to take the
sofa, give Max my room.”

“
Thank you.”

She squeezed her hand. “Mom, I love
you.”

“
I love you, too,
Brook.”

She left and Madeline sat on the porch.
She watched the ordinary day happen around her, felt the sun, wind,
and smelled the scent of summer. But inside, she felt like brittle
pieces of glass, barely glued together. Cracks had started from the
time she had gone to Copper Creek that day to get Brook, they had
spread and progressed through the unfolding events that seemed to
come rolling at her from all sides.

Outside, Madeline drank her coffee,
dried her tears. She set aside her need to have understanding and
forgiveness. She pushed away part of that for now. Many years ago,
she had learned not to turn to someone else, not to reach out into
empty space or to a man, for the sake of unloading. She’d found out
that no one can really know what you’re feeling, and no one can
help you deal with it. Most things, people had to handle on their
own…and if they’re lucky, they come out the other side
eventually.

Madeline later went inside, to freshen
up. Brook came out to sit with her after they ate dinner. It was
still daylight, when the sexy rumble of the little German sports
car sounded up the road. Brook and Madeline stood by the banister.
The sun glinted off its sleek body, and half the neighbors came out
to stare open-mouthed.

“
B—aaad.” Brook gushed. “Go,
Max.”

Madeline was too tense to be drooling,
though anyone who saw it would. It swung into her yard so smooth
the grass seemed to sigh. The engine stopped. It seemed to her he
was sitting inside a bit long. The slick door swung open, and Max
got out.

“
Wow!” Brook seemed to be
making all the sounds for both of them.

He had on sunglasses; a pair of tight
Levi’s black leather shoes. A white ribbed shirt hugged his broad
shoulders and tapered torso. His straight, inky hair was short in
the back, long enough in the bangs, to give him a rakish
appearance.