Brody: The Bang Shift (16 page)

“No telling. At least you didn’t get stranded somewhere.”

“No lie. I’m glad Chad was here this mornin’ to fix it. So, whatcha been out doin’?

“Shopping.”

“All done, Mom. You should head over to Sheppard’s and get them to replace it. You don’t need to be drivin’ around on this donut.”

“Yes, son,” Roxie said, chuckling, then turned to Xan. “Wanna come? I could use some girl talk.”

Xan stiffened at the idea of running into Brody. He’d been avoiding her, and the last thing she wanted to do was go crawling around him like some stray dog, begging for attention. “I-I don’t think—”

“Oh, c’mon now. Please? I don’t wanna sit up there all by my lonesome. They don’t even have a TV in the waitin’ room.”

Well, Brody did leave in the wrecker, so he should be gone a while. That thought gave her the encouragement she needed to say yes. She didn’t mind going if she didn’t have to face him and the humiliation of an in-person rejection. “Sure. Just let me get the last of my bags in.”

“Goodie!” Roxie clapped her hands and Xan shook her head with a smile as she walked across the street back to her car. She grabbed the last of the bags, shut the hatchback, and carried it inside. She yelled to Scott that she was going with Roxie to get her tire fixed and headed back outside. Roxie was already in her driveway.

Xan climbed into the car and turned down the awful country music.

“What’s goin’ on with Brutus? He still avoiding you?”

They’d just had this conversation last night at the boys’ football game. “Nothing’s changed since last night, Roxie.”

“Well, I’ve been thinkin’ about your little predicament,” Roxie said as she tucked her hair behind her ear. “That night we went out, you told me about people watchin’ you. Maybe he knows something about that?”

Hmm. That was what Xan wondered too, but why would Roxie consider that a possibility. “I don’t know who it could be. Why do you say that?”

“Because he always kept to himself, except when he banged some bimbo, but even then he tended to go out of town to pick up some chicks. Then you come to town, and he’s on you like bees to a daffodil.”

Xan smiled. “Maybe he’s just trying to pollinate me.”

Roxie giggled. “I know, right? Men. Always thinking with their peckers.” She waved her hand and turned up the air conditioner even though they were about to pull into the garage. “It’s already September, you’d think it’d cool down already. Anyway, what I’m sayin’ is that maybe he has a reason for, um, for—”

“Fucking me?” Xan prompted, and Roxie blushed. “Honestly? I thought about that, but I can’t be sure. It doesn’t really matter now since he’s treating me like some diseased outcast.”

“Oh, hush up. He is not. He’s a man. Didn’t I just say that men think with their wee-wees? You just need to speak a language he understands,” Roxie said as she turned off her car in front of the empty bay.

They both got out and entered the lobby. Colonel walked over, wiping his hands on a grease cloth. “Hello, ladies. How can I help you?”

“Hey there, Colonel. My tire’s flat. Chad changed it and threw it in the trunk. Can you fix it for me?” She handed him her keys. Xan didn’t miss her glancing at the bays, probably seeking out Bear. Except for the one time Roxie had confessed what happened, she never spoke of him, but knowing the truth, Xan could see the hurt in Roxie’s eyes.

“Sure thing. It may be a while. We’re shorthanded at the moment.”

“That’s okay. We’ll wait.”

Xan followed Roxie to the couch and sat beside her, figuring she shouldn’t bring up Bear and instead thinking about the last thing Roxie had said before getting out of the car. “What do you mean I need to speak his language? He’s a man, not an alien.”

Roxie leaned back, crossing her arms over her perfect body and raising an eyebrow at her. “How long has it been since you’ve been with a man?”

“Umm, a week?” Xan shrugged innocently, knowing that wasn’t the answer Roxie was looking for.

“I don’t mean with Brutus, you dork. I mean before him.”

“A while.” She was
not
going to be specific. Oh hell, no.

“Okay, look. Maybe you’re just out of practice then. I do know you’re under some kind of protection—”

“Shhhh.” Xan swatted Roxie’s shoulder. Jesus, why didn’t she just take out a dang ad in the paper?
Xan Bradley, prude, is on the run from her ex-husband, Marco Collins.

“Sorry,” she whispered. “Any-hoo, I think maybe you haven’t had too many opportunities to keep from getting rusty.”

Lord have mercy. Xan needed to find the exit to get off this horror ride right now. “Get to the point.”

“Seduce him.” Roxie smiled crookedly at Xan.

“Seduce him? How?” They’d already had sex. If she threw herself at him and he turned her down, she wouldn’t even take the time to go find a hole to crawl in because that’d take too long. Nope, she’d just dig one where she stood.

“Remember the night at the club? You went out and bought a kick-ass outfit, and he couldn’t keep his hands off you.”

“I can’t afford to run out and buy something sexy every time I want to get him into bed. Besides, if he doesn’t want me for
me
, then I’m not interested.” Her vagina was calling foul on that.

“Oh, honey. You don’t have to do that every time. Just every now and then to remind him what he’s missing. Besides, I wasn’t really talkin’ about
outer
clothes. I was thinking more along the lines of lingerie.” She wagged her eyebrows, biting her lower lip.

“Good grief. How in the world would he see me in that if I can’t get him alone? I’ve only seen him on the road a few times. I can’t exactly drive around in a teddy.”

“Invite him over—”

“No.” Xan was already shaking her head.

“Scott can stay the night with—”

“Uh-uh.”

“Chad. And you can have the house all to—”

“No way.”

“Yourself. Why? You can’t tell me you’re chicken?
Bwok, bwok
.” She put her hands in her armpits and started flapping her arms. “
Bwok, bwok
!”

“Shut up,” Xan hissed, grabbing one of her arms before Roxie stood and did the damn chicken dance in the middle of the garage lobby.

Roxie giggled as she relaxed back into her seat. “C’mon. Give it some thought. It’s not like either of you are goin’ anywhere. Mark my words. You wear the right thing, and you’ll have him eatin’ right out of your hands, girl. Besides, you could use a little some-some.”

Xan sighed and started to say something when the door to the lobby opened. She turned and stared right into her Viking’s dark-blue eyes. His sunglasses were resting on his head, sweat trickling down his brow. Damn, she wanted to get up and lick it off his body. But knowing that was a really bad idea no matter how much her vagina was seconding it, she couldn’t seem to tear her eyes away from him.

And he just stood there, staring back, his eyes dilating so quickly the blue bled to black before her eyes, the heat in them unmistakable. Oh yeah, he wanted her, so why was he resisting?

But as he stood there, the passion in his gaze shifted to sadness, and then something dark, almost devastating. He swallowed a few times, licked his lips, then looked at his feet and rubbed his nape under the hair tie, mussing the sweaty strands that clung to his neck.

“Everything all right with your car?”

It was obvious he was speaking to Xan, but the fact that he looked away from her hurt. She tamped down that unfamiliar feeling and cleared her throat. “Yeah. Roxie had a flat, and she wanted me to keep her company while it was fixed.”

He nodded and looked up—at Roxie. “You’ve been waitin’ long?”

“Not too long.” She shrugged.

“Um, I’ll go see if anyone’s started on it. If not, I’ll take care of it.”

And then he left the lobby without another glance at Xan.

“Hmmm. That boy is fightin’ some major demons. Did you see that face? Bless his heart. I don’t think it’s anything you did, honey. I think you need to comfort him. And the best way to do that is to wrap your pussy around his cock,” she whispered.

“Roxie!” Sheesh. “He hardly looked at me. Kinda hard to offer comfort when someone is avoiding you.”

“Oh, now don’t be a sourpuss. You know what they say—you catch more flies with honey than you do vinegar.”

Xan took a deep breath. Maybe she really did need Roxie’s advice. At the least, she needed to get Brody to talk to her about his change of heart. “Fine,” she relented. “How do you propose I do that?”

“Easy. Douse yourself in honey and go catch that fly. Let him spend all night licking it off your body.”

If only it were that easy.

Brody watched as Roxie and Xan pulled out of the garage, a heavy feeling in his chest. He’d busted ass to get a new tire on Roxie’s wheel, get her tires balanced, and get them the hell out of here. God, he’d missed Xan like crazy, and seeing her was like pouring a pound of salt on an open wound, one he’d created himself by denying any contact with her.

One he’d created years ago by killing her daughter.

That was still a bitter pill to swallow, but he had no other choice than to face the facts. It was the only conclusion that made sense because the only memories he had of her was when she’d been all dolled up, and from Gage’s, Blade’s and Brody’s research, the only time in her life when she’d dressed in designer clothes like that was when she was married to Collins. Add that to the fact Brody had been in some mysterious accident that by all accounts should’ve left him for dead, rather than with a case of amnesia, that could’ve happened around the time of Xan’s marriage to Collins—it really didn’t bode well for Brody. Collins could’ve tried to ice him after he killed the baby to cover it up. He tried every angle to refute those possibilities and came up horribly short. And disappointed.

And utterly devastated.

He’d been a wreck this past week, growling around the garage like a lion with a sore paw. And the truth was he was a man with an aching heart. He couldn’t deny his feelings for Xan anymore. He was in love with her. And he fucking destroyed her life. He didn’t deserve to be in the same room with her, much less buried in her body. Hell, he didn’t even deserve to fantasize about her. His ass should be locked up on death row, if not already gassed.

He hadn’t allowed himself to look at her even when he was keeping an eye on her place. He’d seen her car in the driveway and knew she was home, but he kept to the shadows and watched for any signs of unfriendly activity at night, and made sweeps of her house during the day while she was at work and Scott was at school. And he thought just being in her house was the worst form of torture. Hell, seeing all the places he’d touched her body and smelling her lingering vanilla scent was bad. But seeing her just now? That was pure agony.

He hoped it’d get better as time went on, but being forced to see her today proved that wasn’t possible. He obviously couldn’t remember for sure if he’d ever been in love before, but he knew he hadn’t been since losing his memory. Until now.

He’d spent these years seeking sexual release with willing women and without emotional attachments, not because he was afraid of falling in love, but because he didn’t know how to be in love with someone. And he still didn’t know how to accept it, deal with it.

It didn’t matter. He didn’t deserve to be in the same room with her, so he sure as hell didn’t deserve to be in a relationship with her. As he thought about her, he knew he’d never love another woman again. She was the only woman fully suited for him, but he wasn’t suited for her. So now he had to learn how to live life without the one woman his heart demanded. If he was man enough, he’d confess to her what he’d done.

But something like that needed to be discussed in person, and he knew if he were alone with her, his cock would overrule all rational thought. To touch her would be succumbing to the darkest sin, one there was no redemption for. He was already damned, and he’d do his best to keep from dragging her with him.

So he was doomed to live a life of hell, knowing he hurt the woman he loved. It didn’t matter that it happened before he fell in love with her. He was a monster, and he couldn’t change his past no matter how much he wished it.

Colonel dropped some lug nuts and cursed, yanking Brody out of his depressing thoughts, though he knew he’d never truly escape them, only be granted brief reprieves.

“Where the fuck is Gage? That little shit knows better than to take off on a Saturday. His ass is the lowest on this totem pole. He should be working overtime to ensure he stays welcome at this job.” Colonel grumbled as he picked up the items he’d dropped.

“He’ll be in later,” Brody said, stepping over to help Colonel. He didn’t want to tell his boss where Gage was—in Prairie County, Arkansas, doing some digging on Dave Simmons.

“Colonel’s right, that punk is new, so if anybody gets a Saturday off, it shouldn’t be him,” Roc said from across the shop.

It’d been a week since Brody found out about Roc feeding innuendo to Xan about Mimi, and he’d been avoiding him because Brody knew he’d knock out that jackass if given the opportunity. But keeping his distance didn’t help him to keep his mouth shut. Brody knew he’d been snapping at Roc all week, but Colonel acted sympathetic, probably figuring that Brody’s mood was specific to the baby-killing news and not something personal, so he hadn’t chided him over it.

“He’s been here for two fucking years, asshole. We all get days off now and then,” Brody growled.

Roc slammed down his wrench and pointed his finger at Brody from over the car he was working on. “I wasn’t talkin’ to you, motherfucker. You can back off my ass any time now. I’m sick of your shit. I ain’t done nothin’ to you!”

That was it. Brody shoved off the ground and stormed over to Roc. “You haven’t done anything to me? You haven’t
done
anything to me? Is that right?” Brody reached the black-haired jerk, grabbed a handful of his shirt and pushed him into the side of the car. “How the
fuck
do you explain Mimi?” Brody yelled in his face.

Roc blanched briefly, then narrowed his green eyes. He put his hands against Brody’s chest and shoved, but Brody was much bigger, and so pissed he couldn’t be moved.

“Get off! I didn’t do anything to Mimi.”

“I’m talking about what you said to Xan about her. Your punk-ass practically told her I was fucking Mimi!”

All work in the shop stopped and a couple of the guys gasped. “Dude, that ain’t right,” Hunter said.

“What the hell’s wrong with you?” Bear shook his head as he headed over to break up the impending fight.

“He likes stirring up trouble, that’s what,” Blade muttered.

“I never said you were doing Mimi,” Roc spat. “I told her you were over at Mimi’s house and had been there all morning. It ain’t my fault she assumed the worst.”

“You lyin’ sack of shit!” Brody’s fist connected with Roc’s face once, twice, before Bear threw his arms around him to pull him away.

He wasn’t strong enough, so Hunter and Blade jumped in to help. The three were finally able to peel Brody off Roc.

“It ain’t my fault you’re sweet on her pussy,” Roc yelled as he threw a punch. Brody blocked it, but not before it made contact with his jaw and slid away.

Getting sucker punched by a prick who was bad-mouthing Xan made Brody’s blood boil even hotter. He roared and dragged the three men holding him back in Roc’s direction and hit him again.

“Enough!” Colonel ordered as he grabbed Roc and pulled him away from the group. It was easier to move the smaller man, and it seemed as if Colonel was going to let it go. But then he got in Brody’s face. “Get the hell out of here. Go cool off at home.”

Then he turned to Roc. “You too. And if you want a job to come back to, you’ll watch your fucking mouth in the future. Got it?”

Roc grunted and nodded before looking away. Brody stalked off to his motorcycle, revved it up, and shot out of the parking lot. He was so pissed he was shaking. So much for not acting on that rage. When he’d snapped, there was no going back. Roc deserved every hit, and then some. Brody should’ve pushed the other guys off and pummeled that jackass. Misguided anger or not, Roc needed to be taken down a peg or two, and Brody was just the man to do it. If that man so much as breathed wrong around him, he’d take him out.

He wasn’t ready to go home because he knew he’d drown his frustrations, anger, pain in more alcohol, so he drove to Gage’s house, hoping he was back and had found something about Dave Simmons. When he neared, he saw Gage’s truck, so he pulled in. After parking, he strode up to the door and knocked. He heard the chain rattle just before the door opened.

“Hey, man. C’mon in.” Brody followed Gage back into his living room where he had a laptop open and papers strewn about. They both sat on the shabby couch. “Whatcha doin’ here so early? I figured I wouldn’t see you for a couple more hours.”

Brody swiped his hand over his face and then over his hair. “Got sent home for fighting with Roc.”

“Ah, well, that was bound to happen.” Gage chuckled. “He needs a good ass-whipping anyway.”

“Yeah,” Brody grunted. “It was stopped before it really started.” He sighed as he sat back and ran his hands over his jeans. “Any luck today?”

“Yes and no. We still can’t count Simmons out as a suspect, but he hasn’t been hiding anything. He was there at the farm today, and I spoke to him. I flashed him one of the fake identification badges Colonel had made for us. Told him I was an FBI agent working the Collins case.” Gage wagged his eyebrows. “He hadn’t seemed uneasy with that and answered the general questions I’d asked. But when I acted like the questions were over and pretended to be shootin’ the shit with him, I asked him about his retirement and he clammed up. Didn’t volunteer any information and promptly escorted me off the property.”

“Hmmm, that could be taken a couple of different ways. Either he’s dirty and was covering his ass, or—”

“Or he’s just a former agent who answered questions to help another agent out and wanted to keep his personal life off the table.”

Either way, Simmons was still a suspect. “We need something more concrete before we decide if he’s a real threat to her.”

“Yeah, I’ve been following the money. So far, that big deposit is the only one that doesn’t fit. It came out of nowhere, and he hightailed it out of the agency as soon as that puppy cleared the bank. Short of asking him outright, which we can’t do, it’s taking longer than I wanted finding the source.”

“Thanks, man. I appreciate you doing all this.”

Gage sat back and stared at Brody for several seconds. “She means a lot to you.”

It wasn’t a question, but Brody felt like answering anyway. “Yep.” As hopeless as the situation was, his feelings were not questionable.

“Look. I know I’ve told you this before, Brutus, but you shouldn’t take what Colonel told you at face value. Think about it. He’s getting intel from sources that are shady. Those guys have their own agendas. Who’s to say the Tess Collins story wasn’t fed with a specific outcome in mind.”

Part of what Gage was saying was true, but Brody couldn’t afford to hope. And yet…

“What would anybody gain by leading me to believe I’d killed Xan’s baby?”

“The very fact that you’re questioning yourself is reason enough. Who knows, man? These guys could be looking for a score and would know Collins is looking for his ex and his kid. We still haven’t cornered that Dale Adams rat. Someone knows Xan and Scott are hiding out here, and we don’t know how close that someone is to Collins. If Adams worked for Collins, he’d be here by now. So I think Adams is some third-party player. He sees you hanging around Xan, feeds this to his boss. Colonel asks questions about your past to people who’d have been around during that time—people like this Dale Adams character. The right person has his ears open, and he can figure out how to play everything to his advantage. If they can’t get to Xan because you’re always around, they take you out. They can’t get close enough to you physically, so they mess with your head, hope to trip you up, catch you off guard.”

Brody chuckled, the first time he felt genuine humor since learning the dreadful news. “That’s some story you’ve conjured up. Unfortunately, you have no proof except to show me the ass you pulled it out of.”

Gage smiled and punched Brody’s shoulder. “My point is we don’t know what happened. If it makes you feel better to distance yourself from Xan, then I’m not going to argue. But I think you should be critical of anything you learn about your past. No matter how good or bad it seems.”

Brody felt a little better looking at his situation through Gage’s eyes. He made sense, and maybe Brody should be a little more leery of what he’d learned about his previous life. But even if there was the slightest possibility that he killed Xan’s daughter, he had to live with it if that were the case. It didn’t change anything about his relationship with Xan. It only gave him motivation to seek the truth for himself.

“Thanks, man. I’m gonna head out. Let me know if you find anything about Simmons’ money.”

“Will do.”

Brody left and let the thrilling hum of this bike soothe his muscles. He was still pissed at Roc and fighting the urge to demand answers from Colonel on his informational sources, but now that he had a glimmer, a sliver of hope, his mind was fighting to recall Xan’s beautiful body spread out beneath him. He couldn’t allow that because nothing had truly changed. But as soon as he got a few beers in him, his moral fiber would dissolve and he’d find himself wrapped up in a Xan fantasy so hot, he’d be jacking off all night.

A few minutes later, Brody was pulling into his driveway. He killed the engine and walked into his house, heading straight for his kitchen. It was time to get started on drowning his morals so he could dream about the woman he loved, doing very naughty things to his body. He yanked the fridge door open, grabbed a beer, and twisted off the cap. He downed half before he turned and almost choked on the last bit.

Because in his haste, he hadn’t noticed he wasn’t alone in his kitchen.

Xan sat in a chair at the far end of the table, facing him, wearing the sexiest, purple-and-black negligee he’d ever seen. His dick was already half hard with images of Xan’s beautiful body. Now it was painfully erect. Thankfully, he was too shocked to groan at the sight of her because he’d definitely be making some noises. He took two steps in her direction before he realized what he was doing.

No.
He stopped and squeezed his eyes shut, blocking out the vixen before him. He couldn’t touch her, but she didn’t understand why.

And he wasn’t going to tell her.

Evidently, he wasn’t man enough to break the news to her. But he didn’t have time to chastise himself right now. He needed to be a dick—not think with his dick—and throw her out. He was rude to her in the beginning, so he could do it again.