Broken Pieces (Riverdale #2) (35 page)

“I can’t change the past, Nick. No matter how much I’d like to. But I can control the course our future takes and I want to be a part of your life.” Her eyes filled with fresh tears as she covered her heart with the palm of her hand. “And I want so badly to be a part of my grandchild’s life. I don’t want to miss a moment.” She said softly. “When I found out I immediately thought that this was my chance to right the wrongs of your childhood. I can be a good grandmother, Nick.” She wiped at the tears that had escaped her eyes and then she glanced up, startled by the blank expression that adorned her son’s face. She swallowed against the lump that she felt form in her throat. “Nick?”

Nick stared at his mother. All he had heard was grandchild, and she hadn’t been referring to hypothetical future children.   She was referring to the present. He shook his head. It didn’t make sense. How could his mother know he was going to be a father, when he didn’t have a clue?

“Mom, what the hell are you talking about?” Nick asked, clearly confused.

“Oh God, I’m sorry.” Lucille said as she covered her mouth with the palm of her hand as if to shovel the words that had fallen out of her mouth, back in.

“Don’t be sorry. Just explain.” Nick said patiently his eyes boring into hers, pleading for the truth.

Lucille nervously ran her hands along her face before staring back at her son. “I went for a mammogram and I saw Samantha in the waiting room. I wasn’t trying to listen, but they were speaking loud enough for anyone to hear.”

“What did you hear, Mother?” Nick said, his patience wearing thin.  His heart slammed against his chest as he anticipated her words.  He began to feel himself break into a cold sweat.

“She’s pregnant.” She whispered finally. “I thought you knew. I thought you were keeping me out of your life. I didn’t mean to be the one to tell you… I didn’t mean to interfere.”

Nick’s whole body slumped as the words left his mother’s mouth. Sam was pregnant. The reality sunk in and the anger boiled in his veins as the questions raced through his head. When did she plan on telling him? Why was it his mother who was telling him he was going to be a father? Was she ever going to tell him? Was this some sort of test? He rubbed at his temples because his head felt like it was about to explode. He needed to hear it from Sam. He needed her to answer his questions because right now he wasn’t thinking rationally, right now he was feeling as if he had been betrayed by the woman he thought
he
wasn’t good enough for.  The woman he would soon be lucky enough to be married to.

He lifted his defeated gaze towards his mother. “I have to go.” He said flatly.

“Please, son. I’m sure it was just a misunderstanding. She was probably planning to tell you in a special way.”

Nick saw his mother’s lips move, but
couldn’t hear what she was saying. He turned around and left her in his apartment.  Running down the stairs to his car, nothing mattered other than getting answers from Sam.

* * * * * *

Sam walked weakly into her kitchen in search for the box of Saltines she had been living on for the last two days. She never would understand why it was called morning sickness when it lasted all damn day. She wrapped her bathrobe tightly around her small frame as the thunder sounded loud enough for her to think the house shook. She grabbed the box of crackers and headed back towards the couch. She was flicking through the channels when she heard someone pounding frantically on her door. Maybe the house had been struck by lightning after all, or maybe a tree had fallen on her car. Either way, she was sure that something bad had happened because someone was here to warn her by the way they tried to break down her door.

She shoved her bare feet into her fuzzy slippers, in case she needed to evacuate and hurried to answer the door, pulling it open just as Nick was about to pound his fist against it again. She stared at him in shock for a moment. He was drenched from the rain his tailored suit clinging to him as he stared at her. Without taking notice of the pained expression he wore, she smiled and threw her arms around him.

“Nick! What’re you doing here? You said you wouldn’t be back until Saturday.” She said happily not caring that he was soaking wet, she clung to him.

He closed his eyes as her arms embraced him tightly. He had been dreaming of her touch for days and wanted to wrap his arms around her and hold her tightly. He wanted to kiss her senseless and tell her he loved her. He wanted to say all the things he had planned on and yet all he could do now was push her away.

She looked at him confused as he took a step back, wiping his hand down his face. His dark eyes met hers and for the first time she took him in. He wasn’t happy to see her. She swallowed as she wrapped her arms around her body, dread creeping up on her. This wasn’t the Nick she expected would come home to her.

“Were you ever going to tell me?” He whispered.

She blinked and wondered if she heard him right. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

“Answer me!” He demanded, his voice raised, but he didn’t shout. “When were you planning on telling me you were pregnant?” He clarified for her.

She was sure she heard him correctly, yet she couldn’t understand how he knew. He had been across the country. How could he have found out? She closed her eyes and felt tears sting the back of her eyelids. This wasn’t how she pictured it, then again, nothing usually went the way she pictured it. Her eyes shot open when another bout of thunder sounded.

“Come inside and we’ll talk.”

“So it’s true. You’re pregnant?”

“Yes.” She whispered and moved so he could step inside. He stood firmly planted in the rain outside the door not budging. “Nick I tried to tell you. I went to see you, but you had already left for Seattle.”

“So what you thought you could punish me?” He said his temper raging. “Nick left, so fuck him. Why bother telling him he was going to be a father? Is that it? Or maybe you thought I’d be a shitty father anyway, so what was the point? I could never be the stand-up guy your brother is, the poor kid didn’t have a shot with me as its father. Which is it?” He said as he angrily ran his hand down his head cupping the back of his neck in frustration.

“It was none of that. God, I didn’t want to tell you over the phone. That’s all. I planned on telling you when you came home.” She paused and tried to read him, to see if her words were sinking into him. “Nick you have to believe me. I never would’ve kept this from you. And none of those thoughts crossed my mind once. I may have been nervous because we didn’t plan this, but not once did I think you would be a bad father or to hell with you because you left.” Her voice strained against her emotions. She refused to cry because crying in her mind meant she was guilty. She hadn’t done anything wrong. She wanted him to tell in person, that was all.

“We spoke a bunch of times while I was in Seattle. You could’ve told me.” He said flatly. He believed her and was beginning to feel like an ass that he had accused her of keeping him in the dark for malicious reasons.

“I could’ve but I wanted it to be meaningful. I wanted to see your face when I told you that we were going to have a baby.” She said softly and looked down not wanting to see the hurt in his eyes anymore.

He
began to process her words. 
She wanted it to be special, to be meaningful, and he had just ruined all that. She wasn’t just any girl. She wasn’t a woman out to trap him and fill his head with lies. She was the girl that had him wrapped around her finger when she was twenty years old and flirted with him mercilessly. She was the girl he dreamed of for six years, the girl he tried to forget but never could. She was the woman he loved. The woman he wanted to marry and have a family with. The woman who made him feel like he could have that. That he even deserved it. The woman he just crushed.

“I know none of this was planned and I…” She started, but he cut her off.

“I have to go.” He stammered. He had to make things right and standing there acting a fool wasn’t helping. He looked at her and watched the hope sink in her eyes and he tilted her chin upward and her moist eyes met his. He leaned down and pressed his lips softly against hers. She reached up to hold his face, to deepen the kiss, to hold onto him, but he pulled away.

Without a word or an explanation he turned on his heel and stalked off into the stormy night. She leaned against the door and closed her eyes. She hoped he just needed time to cool off and that this wasn’t the end.

* * * * * *

Nick’s mind was racing. He was suddenly able to see the future he never thought he could have and it all centered on, the one woman who had been standing in front of him years ago.  A young girl trying desperately to get his attention.
Well, she had his attention now, she had everything, but mostly she had his heart. The one thing he kept under lock and key. He just needed to do things right. The way she deserved.

He figured he had made a pretty nice mess out of things. She was probably sitting in her apartment thinking they were over. But there was one thing that had to be done, the noble thing. His mother was right, his father never taught him how to be noble, but there was one man who did; one man who deserved his respect as much as his daughter did.

Nick took a deep breath and rang the bell of the home he mostly grew up in. He hoped he wasn’t disturbing them, not even paying attention to what time it was. He pressed his hand against his soaked suit jacket and felt the box that was now plastered against his chest in his pocket. The porch light went on and the door opened.

“Nick? Oh dear, get in here. You’re soaked through and through.” Deb said as she pulled his arm from his chest and dragged him into the house. She didn’t care if he dripped all over her floors. “What did you walk here?” She shook her head. “Let me get a towel.”

“I’m fine, Deb.” He said hoarsely, not recognizing his own voice.

She looked at him. “You’re not fine. You’re probably going to catch pneumonia.” She said as she disappeared to fetch a towel.  Nick looked down at himself, damn he was
a mess.

Deb reappeared handing him a towel. “There is a tornado and flash flood warnings all over the news, mind telling me why you’re out in these conditions?” She said, placing one hand on her hip, staring at him with that motherly look of hers.

Nick wiped at his hair, face and then tried to pat dry some of the clothes that stuck to his body. “Is Joe home? I actually wanted to talk to the both of you.” He said realizing that he very much wanted Deb to be present when he spoke his peace.

Deb drew her eyebrows together in suspicion and then looked over her shoulder and shouted for her husband. “Joe!!!”

Joe stepped out of the living room shaking his head and holding his ears. “What is it woman? I think you just punctured my eardrum.” He grimaced and then noticed Nick. “Jesus, you look like shit.”

Nick laughed slightly and then held out his hand to the man he had the utmost respect for. Joe took his hand and shook it just as he had the first time he taught him how to properly deliver a handshake. Nick stared at their joined hands, remembering that day. He was just twelve years old and Joe had said the first step in being recognized as a man is a firm handshake.

Joe raised an eyebrow as he watched him study their joined hands before he nudged his wife. “Did he get hit by lightning or something?” He mumbled under his breath.

“Possibly.” Deb whispered back to her husband as she tried to figure what was going on with Nick.

Nick snapped out of it and released his grip on Joe’s hand. He lifted his head and looked back and forth between the two of them who looked at him as if he was crazy.

Deb smiled, trying to mask her wonderment. “Why don’t we go into the living room?” She said as she led the way.

“Did you get struck by the lightning too?” Joe asked. “He’s soaked and allowed in the living room? I’m not allowed in here with a glass of water, but he can come here like a tsunami?” He asked outraged.

“Shut up, Joe. Clearly, something is wrong.” She said between clenched teeth.

“Actually, nothing is wrong.” Nick said as they made their way into the living room. He was careful to only stand in one place and not lean on the fabric couch, knowing Deb wouldn’t mind the slightest if he messed up her couch, but if it was Joe? Well, she’d crucify him. A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. He wondered if he and
      
Sam would be like that after thirty five years of marriage, he hoped so.

Joe turned around and faced Nick. He raised an eyebrow towards him. “Alright boy, are you drunk? What is going on with you?”

Nick swallowed and broke out into a slight sweat. That seemed to be happening a lot to him today. He couldn’t wait to write this day off as done. He rubbed his hands down his face vigorously before he lifted his gaze and met Joe’s. “I love your daughter.”

Deb let out a whimper as she covered her mouth. Joe shot her a look and warned her to stop the waterworks before they started. He turned back to Nick. “You came out in the rain to tell me something I knew seven years ago?” He sat down in his recliner and grabbed the remote. “Boy that was obvious, even to a guy like me who doesn’t pay attention to much.”