Brunette Ambition (25 page)

4.
Take bobby pins and place them through the elastic in an X formation, securing the bun to your head. Place X-formation bobby pins throughout the bun to anchor it in place.

The Spotlight

1.
Don’t try to make yourself look like everyone else—and don’t use hair and makeup to disguise your uniqueness. Instead, play up what makes you you!

2.
Find a hairstylist and someone who can help you with your makeup whom you really trust—you need someone who is excited to play up your distinctiveness. While it’s great to bring in some professional help for big events, it’s worth it to find someone—your mom, a good friend—who can help you learn how to do your makeup for every day.

3.
Mark, Melanie, and I always confer about what gets to be the star of the show before I sit down in the hair-and-makeup chair. Are you going to do a really fun hairstyle, like a cool braid? Then maybe your makeup should take the backseat. Having too many things going on at once can be overwhelming—unless of course you’re heading out to a big event.

4.
If you tend to style your hair a lot, make sure that you’re not damaging it with too much heat—don’t pull on it with brushes, and don’t rush to straighten it when it might still be damp. Every weekend, take the time to nourish it with a hair masque.

5.
You won’t enjoy your big night out if you’re constantly having to redo or worry about your hair and makeup: Choose a hairstyle that’s touchable (i.e., not too much hair spray) and will look better and better as it becomes more undone as the night progresses; make sure that you apply your makeup in such a way that it will last all night.

CH 9

FRIENDSHIP

“What is exciting is not for one person to be stronger than the other … but for two people to have met their match and yet they are equally as stubborn, as obstinate, as passionate, as crazy as the other.”

—BARBRA STREISAND

Clockwise from top left: With my beautiful girlfriends Jamie, Joanna, and Stephanie
*
me and the girls at my twenty-fifth birthday
*
with Skyler Astin and Lauren Pritchard, some of my Spring Awakening buddies
*
a selfie with Stephanie on a quick trip to New York
*
with my bestie, Chris Colfer, at my twenty-fifth birthday
*
at the Hollywood Haunted Ride with Jennifer and Stephanie—an action shot before we quickly headed for the exit!
*
with the girls in Santa Barbara on a girls’ weekend getaway.

A
s I’ve mentioned, creating and maintaining close friendships has always been difficult for me: Throughout my life, I’ve been too occupied with work. But when I moved to Los Angeles, far from my family, I knew that I would need a support system on the West Coast. I am so grateful that I’ve developed some incredibly strong relationships, because if I’ve learned anything from the very difficult experience of losing someone, having wonderful friends around you is the most important thing there is. While it’s your family’s duty to be there for you, seeing how my friends showed up when Cory passed was simply amazing: They put their own lives on hold to put me first. They were with me every night; they stopped by every morning; they checked in with me all day, every day, to make sure that I was hanging in there. You hope that you will never need to lean on your friends in that way, but it is a powerful feeling to know that you can and that they’ll be there for you in your darkest times of need.

It’s hard to believe that five years ago, this circle did not exist. When I arrived in Los Angeles, I didn’t know a soul on the West Coast, which was both terrifying and lonely. Fortunately, in my first week there, I met Stephanie, a woman who ultimately became one of my best friends and introduced me to a small network of incredible people. And I just so happened to meet her on one of the scariest days of my life. I was in Los Angeles for my final
Glee
audition when I got into a terrible car accident on Pico, right outside of the Fox lot. The crash was like an out-of-body experience: The only thing I remember is leaving my totaled car in the middle of the street (the Fox security team told me they’d take care of it) and running up the lot and straight into my audition, where word of what just happened had already reached the casting director. They told me to go home and that I could audition another day, but I said absolutely not, that I was there to audition for Rachel Berry, and audition I would. I asked for two minutes in the ladies’ room to pull myself together and ducked out the door.

I went to the bathroom, where I appraised my appearance in the mirror. I looked like a mess. And then in walked a quintessential blond California girl of my age, who was a Fox intern who worked in casting. She recognized me from the audition room and asked if I needed anything. I told her that if she helped me get ready, I’d take her out to lunch the next day. She picked glass out of my hair, she wiped the blood from the cuts on my face, and most important of all, she gave me some lip gloss. That day, I got the job of my life and a new best friend. I recognize that it doesn’t always happen that way and that I’m incredibly lucky to have walked right into my circle of friends. It can take a long time to meet great people, but it’s essential to persevere—and remember that quality is always better than quantity.

One of the reasons that Stephanie and I have remained so close—which is the same reason I’m close to all of my friends—is that we both prefer to live very quiet lives. All my friends are the same way. They’re not L.A. party girls—they’re all as driven and focused on their respective careers as I am. We have very different personalities—some of us are more outspoken, some are more sensitive—but the unifying force is that we’re all strong and centered. All of my friends have great jobs and are much more interested in pouring energy into their personal lives than in partying it up on the club scene. On the nights when we all get to hang out together, you’ll usually find us on the couch, ordering food and watching
The Bachelor
. My favorite thing about these nights is that they’re so simple: We really don’t need much—outside of each other—to have fun. As uneventful as that may seem, those truly might be the best nights ever.

FUN NIGHTS WITH GIRLFRIENDS

While girls’ night in always ranks high, we’re not always camped out in one of our houses, rotating DJ responsibilities and ordering in. Here are some of the other things we like to do together:

1.
TRYING NEW RESTAURANTS.
Have I mentioned that I love food? I wish we could do as the girls on
Sex and the City
do and find our version of the diner, but alas, it doesn’t happen every week. We do make a huge effort to see each other as much as possible, though.

2.
GOING TO THE SPA.
Massages are much more fun when you can make a girls’ event out of them.

3.
GOING TO CONCERTS.
Every few months we’ll all get online and see what concerts are coming to town. We make it a point to get tickets well in advance and write it in our calendars in pen. Rihanna on tour? Check.

4.
ROAD TRIPS.
A vacation doesn’t have to mean getting on a plane and heading to a tropical destination. We’ve had some of our greatest times together right outside of Los Angeles. Often, after a particularly long or stressful week, we’ll make a game-time decision, hop into the car, and head to Ojai or Santa Barbara for some group self-care time. We’ll sit by the hotel pool, take some yoga classes, and generally have fun taking care of ourselves, together.

Clockwise from top left: With Stephanie at
X Factor
in 2012
*
with Jennifer in Mexico
*
Stephanie and me in 2012.

SIX FRIENDSHIP NO-NOS

1. If you feel like you can’t be yourself, something is wrong with the friendship. Not only should you feel like yourself when you’re together, but your friends should make you feel like the best version of yourself.

2. There should be reciprocation. Just as you’d do anything for the people you love, you should expect the same from them. My friends would get up in the middle of the night to be there for me; I would make the same sacrifice for the people I love.

3. Your friends should want the best for you. A lot of my friends are actresses, and that could be considered an uncomfortable or a competitive thing. Sometimes we might even be up for some of the same roles, which you’d think would be awkward. It’s not: We truly want each other to get the role as much as we want it for ourselves. Might seem impossible to believe, but it’s true.