Brutally Beautiful (7 page)

Was that Gen’s problem? Her euphoria had scared her this morning with its intensity. She could have seized on the wedding ring as an excuse to bring herself down. Or it just hit that sore spot that still niggled at her and kept her awake nights. Her fury dissipated in helpless mists, and she was left with confusion.

The girl gathered her book and her laptop and left with one backward glance at Gen and a more lingering one for Nick. Even with him dressed in this guise, Gen couldn’t blame her. The swathe of nearly black hair that hung across his face in a silky mass only drew attention to the lowering mystery, the decidedly unpreppy face it surrounded. A strong jaw and high cheekbones delineated someone much tougher than the clothes and hairstyle indicated, if a person looked hard enough. But he’d disguised it well.

He flipped back the hair with an impatient toss of his head, more suited to a schoolboy than this powerhouse, but he didn’t show any sign of self-consciousness. “So,” he said silkily, “questions? Were you looking for an excuse to not see me again?”

She shook her head. “You make me nervous.”

“I make many people nervous, not always for the same reason.” He didn’t show surprise, more resigned acceptance. “But I won’t tell you anything but the truth. I might not answer all your questions, but I won’t lie to you. Is that good enough?”

“Not nearly, but it’ll have to do.” A clever person could cover all kinds of bad behavior that way. But it was a start. “No significant other?”

He shook his head, his hair flopping forward once more. He pushed it back this time and shoved it behind one ear. “Not before you.”
Flatterer.

“Nobody, then.” Stupid to think of anything deeper than what they had. Admittedly it was more than she’d had with anyone else for a long time, but it didn’t work, getting carried away, as she knew to her cost.

He watched her as if he could read everything she was thinking. “If you want to stop seeing me, you only have to say so.”

“I-I don’t.” She took a breath and stared at the table, tracing a pattern on the plastic surface with the forefinger of her free hand. He still held the other, though more gently now. “That is, I’m not sure. I don’t know.” Oh, for fuck’s sake. “Yes, of course I do. That’s why finding the ring felt like a betrayal.” She swallowed. “It wasn’t the first time.”

“Ah.” He made the sound long and drawn-out, relief coloring his tones. “Do you want to tell me about it?”

Why not? She had nothing to hide, even though she felt her face heat as she told him. “I come from a small town in Idaho. Red River. Typical. I had a job at the bank. I thought that was it, my future. I felt trapped, but I knew I was lucky, so I didn’t think about it much. And besides, I met someone.” She had nothing to be ashamed of.
Nothing
. “He was an accountant, someone who visited the bank a lot for his business. We connected, you know?”

“So tell me about this guy,” he said. “This scumbag.” He sat completely still, his attention absolute. A good-looking academic with almost tangible charisma, although she didn’t feel it as much here. So much she didn’t know about him, and the more she delved, the more mysteries emerged. Maybe her boss was right to check on him. Maybe her instincts were wrong, but they were all she had to go on.

She sighed. “I fell for him. He romanced me: roses, chocolates, dinners, the whole nine yards. The dinners were always out of town in dimly lit places, and we got together at my place or a hotel. He said he was between apartments and was living in a motel.”

“You looked at his bank records?” He didn’t appear condemnatory, more curious.

She shook her head vehemently. “No, I wouldn’t. When he came to the bank, I was usually busy elsewhere.” She frowned. “Even that might have been planned. I found his ring once, and he said it was his father’s. Eventually his wife came to see me. She wanted me to leave him alone.” She drew a shuddering breath. “The next time I met him, I asked him about it, and he confessed. Said he’d have nothing if he left her. He worked for her father’s company. He said she was a monster. Said she was his jailer, that kind of thing. But I’d met her, and I’d investigated her. They lived in Boise, and she was a public figure there, her father a business owner who did a lot of charity work in the Rotary Club.”

She hadn’t thought of John for a while. When she tried to think of him, she was surprised to find she couldn’t exactly recall what he looked like or how he sounded. Now she remembered how much he’d hurt her, nothing else. “I didn’t believe him. Sent him away. A few weeks later, she filed for divorce. Said I was the reason, and the local papers were full of pictures of me with John in the little hotels and the restaurants, walking along the street, kissing him outside my house. Social media too. She’d had us watched. She hated me, hated him, or so it seemed at the time. Wanted to brand us both.”

He squeezed her hand. “You don’t have to say any more. You wore the scarlet letter?”

She laughed, remembering the Hawthorne book. “Not that bad. But bad enough.” The stares, the condemnations, the way conversations would erupt into heated whispers when she went by. “I could have lived it down in time, I guess, but I’d broken up a fairytale marriage according to the press. In the end, he went back to her, begged his way back into her life. I felt almost sorry for her. I wouldn’t have taken him back. But nobody was listening to me, and eventually I decided this was my chance. I should get out. I’d always wanted to get my degree, but after school I just drifted, then worked at the bank. I did what I should have done years before, and I applied at DUNY. Seems they like mature students.”

They exchanged a brief smile of recognition.

“I could always waitress, I thought, and I had some money saved to help. But I got a better job once I moved.” She gazed down at the tabletop, traced one of the scratches with her finger, fighting the tears that wouldn’t help, because they never did. “Then I walked in here with your wedding ring and saw you with a gorgeous young girl. I know it’s stupid, I really do, but—I found his wedding ring on the bedroom floor, and…” She swallowed.

He lifted their linked hands to the table and rested them there, and she raised her head to look at him. “I’m a one-woman man. One at a time, anyway. I used to play the field, and if I met two women who were into playing together, then yeah, but I grew out of grabbing everything I could a long time ago.” He took a deep breath and let it out. “Too long. Look at me, Gen.”

“I’m looking.” She couldn’t look away. Those eyes held her; the way he sat totally still made her attend to him.

“Women like me. I don’t know what it is, but when I found out I could do it, I used it to get what I wanted. I don’t do that anymore.”

Jesus, she believed him. Was that his allure, that charisma she, and according to him many other women, couldn’t resist? Could she dare plunge in again, forge more than a friendship with a man? She didn’t know; the thought scared her to death. Here in the big city, few people noticed—even fewer cared—what she did. “You’re saying you won’t two-time me?”

“I won’t deceive you. I’ve never done that with any woman I’ve been involved with.” He paused, and she finished it for him.

“You’ve never needed to.”

He laughed, his face relaxing into the smile she remembered from last night. “No, I haven’t. But I don’t do it. Understand? While there’s you, there’s only you. Nobody else unless you want to share.”

The thought of sharing him made her suck in her breath. “Would you share me?”

Heat filled his eyes. “If you wanted it.”

“You’ve done it before?”

He huffed a laugh, deep and sexy. “I have, yes. Enjoyed it too.” More heat. He stroked her inner wrist with his thumb, and she shivered. “Just tell me what you want, and I’ll make it happen.”

She didn’t know where she had the courage to say it, but it was the bare-naked truth. “I want you.”

He didn’t hesitate but got smoothly to his feet, pulling her up with him and closer, so her breasts skimmed his chest. “Then you shall have me. It goes both ways. I want you too.” Taking one step back, he tugged her hand, and she went with him. Step-by-step, he took her to the end of the row of books. The edge of the bookshelf didn’t quite meet the wall. It was braced against it, top and bottom, with metal struts, leaving an eighteen-inch space. She shook her head. “No.”

“It’s lunchtime. There’s hardly anyone around. Haven’t you ever done it in public?”

She heated and the space between her legs grew wet. Moistening her lips, she managed a “No.”

“It’s about time you did, then. Kiss me. Trust me. Do you?” He kept his voice soft and low, mesmerizing in its intensity. Tugging her closer, he swept his arms around her. She went, and when he lowered his head, she tilted hers to one side, rested it against his shoulder, and let him kiss her.

She wore a skirt today, and he slid one hand up her leg, farther up her thigh, until he met the barrier of her panty hose. He didn’t stop. The soft tearing sound told her he was working his way through to her, and when he nudged the fabric of her underwear aside, he almost gasped in relief. She wanted him to fill her again as he had last night. She wanted that sensation again so badly. He touched her pussy, explored her with two fingers, pushing into her a short way and then sliding along her crease to find her clit and tweak it. She made a small sound, and he purred into their kiss.

Curving his free hand around her waist, he lifted her off her feet and turned her around a full one-eighty degrees so her back was against the cement wall. The window next to them had a drape, so if they stayed here nobody from outside would see them. In any case, they were ten floors up and not overlooked. He ended the kiss slowly, his lips easing away from hers. “I’ll do it to you. You keep a lookout.”

“You can’t be serious.”

He tweaked her clit. “My name isn’t McEnroe. I’m perfectly serious. I can’t wait, Gen. I want you. If you’d expected me to wait, maybe you should have run while you had the chance.”

“But if they catch you, you could lose your place here.”

He kissed her. “That’s what makes it so exciting. All we have to do is take care. I’ve been taking calculated risks all my life, and I’m not stopping now.”

“You’re a gambler?”

“Sometimes.”

She couldn’t say any more because he kissed her again, long and luscious, exploring her mouth with lips, tongue, and teeth, inviting her to explore him, without words. They didn’t need any at this point. He tasted so good, kissed so well, as if he’d studied how to please her. They explored each other, and she tasted him, sucked gently on his tongue, opened her mouth for him.

He removed his hand from her pussy, and she heard the rasp of a zipper. She knew his skill with condoms, but she hadn’t expected him to return to her within seconds with what was unmistakably his cock nudging her pussy. Her skirt was squashed between them. He’d torn so much of her panty hose that they almost weren’t there, and his hands felt bare against her ass when he cupped it and lifted her, impaled her.

She gasped at the impact but clamped her mouth shut, then pressed her lips against his shoulder, the rough cloth of his shirt rubbing against the sensitized skin erotically. “So fucking good,” she murmured, careful to keep her voice low.

He murmured against her ear, his breath hot. “Remember, keep your eyes open. Keep watching.”

She could see into the bay opposite, empty like theirs apart from the detritus of their belongings scattered on the chairs and table. His laptop flickered, the only movement apart from them. If anyone passed them now…

A surge of heat almost blinded her vision, and she bit down, heedless of his grunt of pain and then his laugh, so soft it was almost not there. “That’s it, sweetheart. Does it turn you on? Thinking of someone coming and finding us? Would they watch for a while? Or scream and fetch everyone in the library to come and see us? What would you do then, eh? You feel amazing. All over me. Oh yes, baby, brace yourself because I’m coming back.”

Gen could only moan. He hitched her higher and plunged deeper. She lifted her legs, found purchase for the bend of her knees around his waist, pressed her legs from knee to ankle against the metal bookcase for some kind of support while he fucked her senseless. Or almost senseless, because she watched, kept her vision trained on that space, wondering if anyone would come, if he’d realize what they were doing, or just assume they were engaged in a heavy necking session. Nick hadn’t lowered his pants, so all anyone could see for sure was their clothed bodies pressed close together, her skirt rucked up around her thighs, the longer jacket of her suit draped haphazardly around her.

The thought of anyone finding them had a bizarre effect on her libido. It grew higher, the heat and sensitivity increasing until every nerve tingled, like her body had turned into some kind of champagne, bubbling over with exuberance. She wanted to laugh, but didn’t dare. The way he was driving into her with a single-minded relentlessness, his cock hot and hard, channeling its way into her pussy, told her this situation turned him on as much as it did her.

Her breath caught in her throat, and she pressed her mouth against his shirt, afraid to draw away until he murmured to her again. “Kiss me but don’t close your eyes.”

She met his lips with a gasp of relief, knowing she was close. How did he fuck her so well, finding her most sensitive spots every time? Nick seemed to know what she wanted before she did, and he moved to allow for it. Now their kiss sent her up and up, to that plateau from which there was only one escape. The dive down to earth, but the journey… Oh, the journey!

She launched and flew, soaring high and free for that short time as her body melted against his and they became one. He moaned into her mouth, low, just a vibration in his throat, and she drank in the sound like a tribute. She didn’t know if she made a noise. He finished the kiss, then instigated another, gentler before he lifted her away and lowered her to the floor. Her shoes had little ankle straps, so they’d stayed on. She could have driven the sharp heels into him, marked him for her own, but she didn’t. Hadn’t thought of it, concentrated on keeping lookout.