Building on Lies (31 page)

I was in the hospital for over three weeks. It was strange, but for the first few days I was in the hospital, I was so angry I refused to see anyone but my mother. I don’t know why. I guess it was a reaction to the situation. Or maybe I was mad Channing had put me in such danger, or that my friends hadn’t been able to protect me. I was also ashamed at how I hadn’t even fought Samantha. I’d let her shoot me like a clay pigeon. I kept having nightmares about being trapped in her trunk, the gun being pointed at me, the blast of it going off.

I finally let Ro in to see me after a week had passed. She looked so pale and sickly it almost looked like she’d the one had been shot. She cried as she held my hand.

“ Nellie, I was so scared”, she whispered, kissing my hand.

“ It’s OK”, I said, bemused that I was the one who had to comfort her.

“Crazy fucking bitch!”, Ro spat out. “ Do you know her parents managed to get her out of the country? She might get away with this!”

I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to think about Samantha St. John. My nightmares were also of Samantha… her sing song voice, her bright red hair, her dreamy eyes. I kept seeing her with the gun, and how she’d shot me like I was a dog.

“ Chan has been here everyday since it happened”, Ro said, gently. “He’s even slept here”.

I nodded. I knew. My mother had asked me everyday if I wanted to see him. I kept telling her no.

“ Why won’t you see him, Nellie? Why wouldn’t you see me?”, Ro asked, hurt in her voice.

“ I was scared, Ro”, I said, after a while. I looked out the hospital window, at the parking lot outside. “ I was scared I’d be mad at you, when I know I have no reason to be.” I didn’t answer her question about Channing.

My voice trailed off. Ro nodded. She sat with me for a while longer, and we talked about silly things, like Em finally getting back together with Steven, the boy she liked. How Joaquim’s dad had finally bought a new car, and given Joaquim the old truck.

“ Everyone is asking about you, Nellie. The nurse told your Mom she’s never seen one person have so many visitors”, Ro said, just before she left.

After that, I allowed visits from Joaquim, Ana, Em, Tommy, everyone except Channing. I thought eventually Channing would get the hint I didn’t want to see him, but everyday my mom would ask if I wanted to accept his visit.

“ Nellie, you need to talk to boy”, she told me eventually. I was feeling a lot better, and I was scheduled to be released the next day.

“ I feel sorry for him, the way he just sits there”.

I didn’t say anything. There was a TV over my bed, and I flipped through the channels, pretending to be looking for something good to watch. My mother sighed, and walked out of the room when I focused my eyes on the TV set, instead of answering her.

She came back a few moments later. “ Ty Sutton is here. Do you want to see him?” she questioned, doubt in her voice.

“ Ty?”, I repeated. My mom nodded.

I shrugged. What could it hurt to see Ty? “ Sure”.

Ty came in, carrying a bouquet so large it covered his face. He placed it on a table that was already overflowing with flowers, stuffed animals, cards and balloons from my friends.

“ Hey, Nellie-girl”, he said, smiling broadly, as if we were passing by in the school hallway, instead of facing each other in a hospital room.

Ty had a really contagious smile, and I found myself smiling back at him.

He sat on the edge of my bed, and pointed at a food tray a nurse had left for me. “ You going to eat that jell-o?”

I giggled. “ Seriously?”.

“ I’m a sucker for green hospital jello, I don’t get to have it everyday”. He grabbed the plastic cup, and started to eat it. He was smiling, but his blue eyes were serious. “So, how you doing?”

“ Good”, I said, simply.

“ You look great. For having been stuffed in a trunk, thrown in a haunted house and almost shot to death, you look really fantastic”, he said, waving his spoon at me.

I laughed so hard, I snorted. “ Ty, stop! You’re going to make my leg hurt”.

“ Your leg?”, Ty repeated, raising a blond eyebrow. “ I’ve never made someone laugh so hard they felt it in their leg, that’s a first for me”.

“ Stop it!”, I giggled, hitting him with a pillow.

“ OK, I’ll stop”, he promised. He rearranged the sheets around my feet. “ So, how long are you going to make Chan pay for what happened?”

I stopped smiling. “ I don’t know what you’re talking about”.

“ You know, my parents kicked him out. Completely. Threw his clothes out on the street. Took away his car. My Dad said he never wants to see Chan again”, Ty said, quietly.

I looked at him in shock, but I didn’t say anything.

“ I’m not telling you this for you to feel sorry for him. Personally, I think it’s the best thing for Chan. He’ll never be the guy he should be as long as he’s under my parents thumb.”, Ty continued.

“ Where’s he staying?”, I asked, softly.

“ Well, lately he’s been living here in the waiting room. Honestly, I think they’re about to start charging him rent”, Ty said.

“ Ty!”, I said, softly. “ Come on”.

“ I told him he’s got a nice setup here in the hospital. Water cooler, bathroom, magazines...”

“ Ty!” I said, impatiently, wanting a serious answer.

“ He’s been crashing with Nate,” Ty finally responded. “Nate’s parents kind of took him in. Trust me, he’s not going to be homeless. We’ve both got solid trust funds that’ll last us until we’re old men. But, it’s still kinda hard to know your parents won’t have anything to do with you”.

“ Why are they doing this to him?”, I asked.

“ They blame him for what Samantha did. As always. They said if he hadn’t cheated with you, she might not have gone all homicidal like that. It doesn’t matter Samantha has been crazy since we were in kindergarten. It’s all Chan’s fault she tried to kill you”, Ty said, bitterly.

“Was she always like that, Ty?”, I asked, needing to know it wasn’t my relationship with Chan which sent her over the edge.

“ Always”, Ty said, firmly. “ She’s never been healthy, she always did weird things to scare us all half to death. And that was just the first grade”.

I laughed again. “ Ty, you’re too much”.

“ My point is, I’m sorry this happened to you. And so is Chan. Trust me, he’s more sorry than you could ever know. My parents have done a real good job of making Chan feel like everything that goes wrong in the world is his fault.”, Ty said, seriously. “ And then he finally finds a girl who makes him feel worthy, and good about himself, and she almost gets killed by his fucked up girlfriend”.

“ I wish I wasn’t so mad at him, Ty”, I admitted. “ I wish this never happened”.

“ It’s OK to be mad, Nellie. You almost died”, Ty said, his blue eyes intense. “Samantha humiliated you in the worst way. But you need to make peace. With yourself, with Chan…and maybe even one day, Samantha herself”.

I nodded, tears spilling down my cheeks.

“ I know what you’re scared of”, Ty continued. “ You’re scared when you see Chan you won’t love him anymore. And then all of this would have been in vain”. He waved his hand around the hospital room.

He was so right it took my breath away.

“ But just like you survived gunshot, and cellar, you can survive finding out if you still feel the same about my brother. So, can you please, please talk to him?” Ty looked at me, pleading for his twin brother.

I nodded, slowly. “ OK”. My voice was barely a whisper.

Ty took a deep breath, and got up. He came around and kissed my nose. “ Thanks, Nellie.”

He got up to go, then turned around. “Oh, by the way…” he hesitated, a frown on his handsome face.

“ What?”, I asked, tilting my head.

“ I’m pretty sure I’m in love with Romina. You better warn her about me when you go home from here. I’m probably going to break up her engagement with Tommy”, he said, not in the least bit joking.

Before I could even respond he walked out of the room, calling over his shoulder,“ I’m going to go get Chan”.

All I could do was stare at him in surprise as he left. He didn’t give me a chance to reply.

And then all thoughts escaped me as Chan entered the room.

I don’t know how it was possible for someone to look so bad, but so good, at the same time. There were deep dark circles under Chan’s eyes, and he needed a shave. His hair was long, and sticking up all over the place, like he hadn’t put a comb to it in days. His face was thin, and hollow.

But I could still see the bulge of his muscles under his shirt, and his eyes were still a mesmerizing green. He looked so scared my heart melted.

It also started to flutter wildly in my chest, the way it always did when I was around him.

I thought I was going to float right off the hospital bed. I was still in love with him! All I wanted was to throw my arms around him.

Instead, I just smiled at him. I didn’t know what to say, so I said the first crazy thing came to my mind. “ I’m not scared of spiders anymore”.

He looked startled, but then he gave me one of his slow, mysterious smiles. “ I’m glad. It’ll save a lot of money on Raid”.

“ Come here”, I said, softly, patting a space beside me.

He came and kissed my hair, my forehead, my eyes, my lips. “ Nellie, I was so scared”.

“ I’m fine now”, I whispered.

“ It kills me to think I almost lost you” he said, raggedly. “And it’s all my fault. I should have gone home with you that day. I should have-”

I put my hands to his lips. “It’s OK. It’s over.”

Chan looked at me, his green eyes drinking me in. “ I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure Samantha pays for this”.

“ I’m sure she will eventually”, I said. “ But, I’m just glad I got out of there alive”. I knew he wanted to hear everything happened. I told him everything, from start to finish.

“ I’m not speaking to Bethany anymore”, Chan said, angrily. “ She told me what she did the same day it happened. She felt so bad about it, but I can’t believe she betrayed me like that. She knows how much you mean to me”.

“ Chan, Samantha threatened her with the gun, too. I understand why Bethany was so scared. But I don’t want to talk about that. I have a feeling I’m going to have to explain what happened for a long time. For now, I want to talk about you, about us”, I said.

Chan nodded, and I knew he was afraid I was going to leave him. I put my hand over his.

“ Chan, I love you”, I told him, simply. He kissed me softly, carefully, and I could sense the relief in his body.
“ But I can’t be with you until you learn to be a little bit more like Ty. A little more courageous, a little less scared of your parents”, I said.

“ I’m not living with them anymore”, Chan said. “ They kicked me out. I’m living with Nate, now.”

“ I know. Ty told me. But for how long? Until your parents decide to forgive you? How long are you going to sacrifice your dreams to be what they want?”

“ Nellie, I’ve already decided I’m not moving back in. I’m going to try and sell more of my woodwork. I’m even going to try and emancipate myself so I can get access to the rest of my trust fund, so I won’t have to rely on them for support”, he said. “ I’m going to follow my own heart, you know?”

“ Good” I said, squeezing his hand. “ You can’t be afraid anymore. Don’t wait until you’re in a horrible position to decide you want to make changes in your life. Gosh, who knows what I’ve been missing out on because I was scared of some silly little spiders! I could have died without seeing my grandma’s new house!”

Chan laughed, and so did I.

“ You know what your next step is, right?”, I said, my tone serious again, playing with his hair. “Beside breaking free of your parents, and Samantha, and all that?”

He shook his head. “No. What?”

“ You need to find your kid. Give him the wood frame yourself”, I said, simply. “There’s nothing holding you back now.”

“ Yeah”, he agreed, after a pause. “ It’s going to take a lot of luck. My parents sealed the adoption pretty tight”.

“ Chan, I know about luck. Trust me, I’ve had some awful strange luck in my time. Starting with how I met you!”.

We smiled, and he leaned into me, and we watched TV until visiting hours were over.

I was released the next day. My friends packed into my house, all wanting to see me, all wanting to hear about my horrible ordeal. Egg Cove people are like that…there’s nothing like some good gossip, especially one that almost involved murder.

There were some strange looks from my friends as Channing sat beside me on my couch, jumping up every now and then to fix the pillow under my leg, or getting me something to drink. An A-boy hanging out with an Egg Cove girl still took some getting used to.

I overheard Thiago, Ana’s boyfriend, asking Ro about it.

“ She’s not with him because of money or anything, right? What’s this all about?”

“It’s about luck, and wood, and spiders, and love, Thiago. Just leave it at that,” Romina replied.

I had to smile at that one.