Burned by Passion (11 page)

But how on earth was she going to bring herself to give him the news that she could no longer go through it – and consequently end her very convenient engagement?

Very convenient in the sense that apparently once Blake got wind of the news that she was getting married, he’d stayed well clear. And yes, he had promised her as much back then in the elevator. But she hadn’t really believed it. Until the one incident that finally convinced her that he’d meant every word.

It was barely a week after the day they’d ended up alone in the same elevator. This time, they collided with each other just outside the door leading to his father’s inner offices. Blake had immediately righted her with impersonal hands on her shoulders. With a curt worded apology he’d released her almost instantly and then walked away without a backwards glance. No sign of recognition; not even a word. It had been impersonal to the extreme and Kira had felt half relieved, half sad. The dark warmth in his beautiful grey eyes had been replaced with ice-capped shields she could never hope to break through. And she’d told herself she was fine with that.

Over the past weeks things had improved to perhaps a few cool glances and ever fewer, more frigid curt words whenever he had to come up to see his father about something. She knew he’d long moved out of the Carter villa and into his own house across the city. Kira also kept wondering if he’d also moved on in his ‘relationship’ with Brittany if it could be called that. But then she called herself a fool for giving either of them a thought. As far as she was concerned they deserved each other.

And then the enormity of her situation suddenly really struck her and Kira’s heart went cold. Could she ever bring herself to tell Blake the truth? She wasn’t ready to think about what his reaction would be. She’d convinced herself that all he must have wanted was a fling; how would he feel about Kira now carrying his baby?

Getting pregnant by her boss’s son had definitely not been in her job description, Kira thought with a wry sigh. But she was adult enough to face the outcome of her own foolishness. She had no one to blame but herself and it wasn’t as if Blake had forced her. She’d succumbed willingly and now she wasn’t about to expect pity or handouts from anyone. She’d been burned by passion and now she was going to have a baby soon to show for it.

Once she’d taken more time to think, Kira realized exactly what she should do. A fresh start; that was what was needed in the situation. She’d begin a new life somewhere and build back her life again. She felt sorry about the way she was going to disappoint Mr. Carter, her boss. He’d given her an opportunity not many people would have. She remembered being fresh out of secretarial school and had shown up for the interview with other, more experienced applicants. Some had looked far more suited to the esteemed role of secretary to Bretton Carter. But in the end he’d picked her, out of all the others and she’d never forget how wonderful that had felt. She would be eternally grateful to him for that.

Now she was going to leave it all behind. She would have to think up a good excuse for her boss why she was leaving and she hoped his normally astute mind wouldn’t guess at the truth. It had been hard enough having to face him every day knowing her ‘crime’, cringing when she wondered what he’d think or say if he ever found out. Thankfully, now she’d never know.

Sighing deeply, Kira left the bathroom feeling strengthened that finally, she was going to take full charge of her life and her responsibilities. No more regrets, no going back. She had a child to think about now and nothing would prevent her from doing her best by it.

***

It was over a customary dinner with his father that Blake was told of the upcoming wedding taking place in just three weeks. Kira was getting married.

He looked up from his plate, finding the mere act of swallowing had become a herculean task. “What did you say?”

“The wedding. Kira and Terrence. You must have heard of the engagement,” her father said mildly over the rim of his water glass. “I’m proud to say I’m an honored guest at the occasion.”

Blake’s lips tightened fractionally. “I see. How nice. And there I was thinking you didn’t approve of the chap. What did you call him again?”

“Terrence,” Bretton said and then shrugged. “Well he did strike me as someone not to be taken too seriously. But since he’s the only one I know willing to do the honorable thing and marry the young woman, I’m bound to give him my good wishes.”

Blake wasn’t insensitive to the hidden barb. Obviously he was the one not willing to do the honorable thing. It infuriated him how easily it was for others to think the worst of him. Even Kira had believed that all he wanted from her was her body and had never given him a chance. She would never know that sex hadn’t been the main thing that kept him thinking about her; day in and out even months after that one time together. No other woman seemed right for him and he’d since given up on dating or finding someone new. Perhaps deep down he’d hoped…

Furious with himself and too angry to even finish his meal, Blake left for his place immediately after dinner. In bed later that night he tossed and turned. Thinking about how this time next month, Kira would be some other man’s wife. The very notion ate at him so bad he couldn’t see straight. How could he have been so wrong about them? He called himself all kinds of fool for nursing any expectations where they were concerned.

He had kept up an icy wall each time they’d crossed in the past several weeks. He’d had his pride to think of and hadn’t been ready to face another rejection. Instead, he’d been so sure she’d come to her senses eventually. How could she even think of marrying someone else? He refused to believe he’d only imagined what had surged like wildfire between them. In a flash it had turned everything else around them to dust until no one or nothing even mattered but the force field of passion that had surrounded them. There’d been more than just a joining of bodies. She’d given herself to him like she’d done with no other man. And now she was going to throw it all away. The thought of her in bed with another man made him physically ill.

All these weeks he’d kept his true emotions hidden but each time he saw her it seemed to grow deeper and stronger. He’d tried to deny his own heart but it hadn’t worked. He’d only wanted her all the more.

And that was why he’d stayed on in that stupid job of his. He could’ve left any day he wanted but he’d stuck around just to be close to her, hoping to get his chance. He’d been so sure she was with Terrence just to spite him, but now he knew better.

Blake knew he’d fallen hard for Kira but it was obvious to him at this juncture that she didn’t give a damn about him. How could he have been so delusional thinking she might secretly feel the same way? She’d never want to stray from her comfort zone by being with a white guy, or so she’d made Blake believe. Especially when he’d so easily made her lose control the way she had with him. He’d tried to understand why she was coming from but by now it was getting damned hard to figure out.

He’d been with a number of women; all beautiful, glamorous, from around the world. But with Kira it had felt different; like he’d found his way home. As brief as the encounter was, it had been powerful enough to influence a major part of his life. He’d not only worked to patch things up with his dad, but he’d let go of a lot of bitterness and pain he’d felt over the loss of his mother. And now he’d lost Kira too – even before he’d even truly had her. The finality of that thought made him want to smash his fist through something.

You think you’ve won, Kira; Blake fumed as he turned over once again in his cold and lonely bed. But you still owe me one. And I intend to be paid in full…

Chapter Eleven

Kira breathed in deeply, covering her nerves with a bright smile for Terrence who sat across from her in her apartment. They were just back from one of their regular evenings out. She’d purposely invited him up with her, and not for what he was thinking which she knew was a long-awaited invitation into her bed. After all it had been almost seven months since they’d met and they’d been a serious couple for half that time so he’d been more than patient. It was just too bad that on this occasion she was about to break the news to him that she was no longer able to proceed with the planned wedding.

He’d poured himself a drink though Kira had declined having one. Now he smiled and then patted the spot right to him. “Hey, sweetcakes, you’re sitting too far away. C’mere.”

Kira rose but only to stand further away, turning her back to him as she hugged herself bracingly, praying inwardly for strength.

“Kira? What’s wrong, honey?”

His jovial voice was now laced with worry and she heard him place down his glass and rise. “Is everything okay?” he asked in concern.

Kira turned abruptly to face him. “I can’t marry you, Terrence,” she blurted out.

He stared at her, and then burst into a short, incredulous laugh.  “Sure you can.”

“I’m not kidding, Terrence,” she said gently but with underlying firmness. “I mean it. The thing is; something has um…come up. And I don’t think it would be fair to…to keep things going as they are. I’m really sorry.”

“To hell with fair!” Terrence growled, jumping forward and grabbing her arm. “And fuck being sorry. What the hell are you playing at? For god’s sake tell me the truth!”

“I…I can’t,” Kira mumbled, her expression pained. It broke her to pieces seeing him so shocked and angry. The last thing she’d want would be to aggravate him by letting him in on the facts. He’d never forgive her. How could any man forgive what she’d done?

“Please, Terrence. Why can’t you just…let it go?” she begged, her eyes cloudy with tears. “The last thing I want to do is hurt you. I do care about you, I just can’t marry you.”

“No fucking way,” Terrence said on a snarl. “Damn it, Kira. You’ve been hiding something from me, and I demand to know what!”

Just then the doorbell rang shrilly and Kira almost slumped in relief when he abruptly let her go.

“Don’t move. I’ll get that,” he said with obvious control, and Kira was too distressed to argue. Once he was gone from the room she felt the pounding in her head reach unbearable proportions. She went into the kitchen for a cold glass of water which usually helped. She heard Terrence return to the living room as she gulped down some aspirin. Striving to stay calm, she delayed going back to face him again, until the strange silence in the adjoining room made her push the swing door open in curiosity.

She went rigid when Terrence turned and she saw his face.

It looked figuratively black with fury and for once Kira’s heart thudded in fear of him. A fear which deepened when he spoke and she heard the threatening tone in his voice.

“What the hell is this all about?” he all but roared.

Kira’s confused glance lowered to his outstretched hand which held a gift-wrapped rectangular box in black with white bows dotting it, which looked ripped open. Peeking out were a pair of lace trimmed white panties. A small red card lay half squashed in his other hand. Kira frowned and looked back up at him.

“What…what’s that?” she asked stupidly, feeling an impending cloud of doom.

“A piece of flimsy unmentionables dedicated to ‘a certain part of your anatomy’ that is still kept a mystery from me,” Terrence bit out sarcastically. “Just when did you start receiving gifts of lingerie?”

Kira suddenly broke out of her daze to snap angrily at him, “Well, ever since you started to open them, I guess! How dare you!”

“How dare I?” he repeated with soft menace. “I dare, Kira, because out of the blue you get cold feet and something told me this just-delivered little present might hold the answers I need. Now you better start talking about where these came from because they certainly weren’t from me! Who the hell are you fucking? Because it sure as hell isn’t me!”

Kira found herself unable to respond as he flung the small red card at her. Picking it up she fastened her eyes to the message scrawled in bold, black ink jumping right at her.

It read,

“This, my dear Kira, is to substitute for the pair I divested you of…                           

              I know it will be a perfect fit, because I’ve got first-hand knowledge of

                            That certain part of your anatomy. Hope you like

                                       Satin and Lace”

Kira was still gaping down at the note long after the words had registered, before Terrence’s voice reached her numb brain.

“So, I guess this must be the ‘something’ which according to you has just come up,” he noted with an acid tone. “Some lover you’ve been seeing behind my back? Damn, Kira. You sure had me fooled. I mean someone needs to give you an Oscar. Putting on that virgin-bride-to-be act show with me all this time. Ever since we met you gave me the impression you were the type who’d like to wait for the wedding night but looks like I was not only insane but stupid too. Because from the look of things you haven’t been doing much waiting except with me. So who’s the lucky guy who’s been getting it, huh? Someone I know? Your boss maybe? How does it feel to fuck it old guy?”

Kira could barely even hear him now, her senses in a whirl of shock and disbelief at the man who would sink so low as to do this. There was no doubt in her mind Blake was responsible even though the note was left unsigned. Only one man would have the audacity to pull this type of stunt. But why?

She was made aware of her surroundings when Terrence suddenly grabbed her by the arms and shook her hard. “I asked you a question, Kira. Answer me, damn you,” he snarled. His eyes were burning coals that made her feel guiltier than ever. “Or don’t you think you owe me that much? Who’s the mystery man you’ve been screwing under my nose?”

Kira’s teeth chattered as she tried to speak. His reaction scared and shocked her. She’d never known he could reach such a level of rage that his teeth were bared and each word was forced out through clenched jaws. “Let me go!” she stammered with each shake from his cruel hands. “You don’t know what’s going on!”