Burning for You (Blackwater) (21 page)

Who am I kidding?  How could things
get worse today?  My best friend’s baby has been kidnapped and she saw me
hugging her husband, who happens to be my ex-boyfriend.  I was stalked by my
ex-asshole-husband after having lunch with a woman who’s probably lying to me
to get to a man who is supposed to be the love of my life.  Oh god, I realize
what’s happening.  All I want is to be with Ash.  I’m falling so hard for him I
can barely breathe.  I look on the nightstand next to me at the vial and
dropper and wonder if Erika is attempting to poison me.  “Now you sound
ridiculous,” I say aloud to myself.  I hear a knock at my door.

“Leah,” my mother’s voice says on
the other end.  I quickly close my robe and tie it tight around my waist,
embarrassed about being on my bed in the state I’m in.  “Can I come in?”

“Sure,” I say when I feel like I’m
decent enough.  I press my cheeks flat to attempt to get the flush out of
them.  There’s really no point in hiding anything from my mother when she knows
everything anyway. 

“Heidi is home with the baby,” she
tells me when she opens the door.  My heart begins to pound when I hear “baby”,
but I’d almost forgotten that Heidi had been gone to pick up her newly adopted
child.  “It’s a boy.”

“That’s great,” I say, slightly
less than enthusiastically.  “Are you going over there?”

“I thought we could both go,” she
suggests.  “Perhaps bring them some dinner?”

“As long as it’s not four Lean
Cuisines, I’m sure they’ll be grateful,” I tell her. 

My mother smirks.  “I ordered carry
out from Chez George.  Are you coming with me or not?”

I sigh.  I’m completely exhausted,
but I really have nothing better to do.  “Fine, I’ll come with,” I say.  “But
there had better be wine.”

Seeing Heidi with a baby is like
watching a little girl with a doll.  Heidi’s small body looks shrunken and lost
in the rocking chair that Jack has brought in for her to feed their newly
adopted son.  She croons a tuneless song at the infant who is dressed in a baby
blue sleeper as she holds a bottle to his mouth.  The baby is beautiful, with a
soft and wispy blonde tuft of hair and cloudy blue eyes that seem to take in
everything.  He barely cries.  Jack looks on lovingly by Heidi’s side.  They
all make a pretty picture. 

“So tell me what happened?” I ask. 
“Where did you go to get him?  Did you meet the mother at all?  Were you there
for the labor?”

“Oh, it was pretty uneventful,”
Heidi replies, her ice blue eyes flashing up at me with a look that indicates
she’d rather not relive anything by answering my questions.  “I didn’t meet the
mother, but I’m glad I didn’t.  I can’t imagine giving up a baby to a
stranger.”

“Well that’s a weird outlook for
someone who just adopted a baby,” I tell her.  Heidi glares at me but doesn’t
say anything and continues to rock.  “Have you and Jack picked out a name?”

“We were thinking about naming him
after Dad,” Heidi says.  “Jared Jack Bellamy.  J.J. for short.”

“After Dad?” I ask in disbelief.  “You
can’t do that!”         

“Why not?” Heidi asks, narrowing
her eyes at me.  “He was my father too.”

“He’s not dead and you’re talking
about him like he is,” I say, standing up and walking toward her.  Heidi
shrinks back into her chair as far as she can go.  “You can’t name a baby after
a living relative.  It’s bad luck!”

“Leah,” my mother says sharply.  She
raises her voice above her normal level, stunning Jack, Heidi and I into
silence.  “Your sister can name her child what she wants.  You need to calm
down.  It’s not bad luck unless you’re Jewish, and last I checked, we are not.”

I begin to protest.  “But-“

“Leah, come with me in the
kitchen,” my mother says in a stern voice.  “Now.”  My eyes grow large and I
follow her into the kitchen, sinking down into a stool and putting my elbows on
the counter to cradle my head in my hands.  For some reason, I start to cry. 
“Leah, what is going on?”

“I don’t know!” I hiss.  “It’s been
a horrible day, and I already finished a bottle of wine, and there’s none
left!”  I begin to sob uncontrollably, wondering if I’m about to get my period
or something.  “Why do I feel so horrible?”

“Did you fight with Ash?” my mother
asks me.  I nod, wiping the tears away from my face.  She walks over to the
refrigerator and lo and behold, she produces another bottle of wine.

“Well that was cruel,” I declare. 
“You’ve been holding out on me.”

“Leah,” she says, finding two
glasses and pouring mine particularly full.  “There’s something wrong with this
adoption.”

I stare at her.  “I think so too.”

“You do?”  I nod.  “Why do you
think that?”

I shrug.  “I just get this bad
feeling that there’s something Heidi is hiding.  Something is very off.”

My mother stares back at me and
blinks.  “How would you know that, Leah?”

“I don’t know!” I shake my head. 
“Am I wrong?”

My mother sits in the stool next to
me and takes a large swig of her wine.  “No,” she says in a hushed voice. 
“You’re not wrong.  This whole thing isn’t right, but I can’t understand why
you would get that feeling.  I didn’t even say anything and you have that
feeling.”

“True,” I shrug.  “Maybe it’s just
a feeling and a lack of trust for Heidi.”  I look at her but she seems
unconvinced.  “What do you think is going on?”

“With you?  I think you are more
water than you know.”

My brow creases in confusion.  “You
mean my elemental?”

She nods.  “You could have a dual
elemental, Leah.  Your father and I are unique in that we are opposing
elementals and also catalysts.  It wouldn’t be unusual for you to carry a dual
elemental.”  She sighs.  “But it’s a heavy burden on the bearer.”

“What do you mean?” I want to know.

She shakes her head.  “It might not
be anything.  I’m not even sure I’m right, so let’s not go down that path until
we have to.”

“Okay,” I agree, finishing my glass
of wine and reaching over to pour myself another.  “So what is going on with
this adoption?”

“Not here,” my mother says in her
lowered voice.  “We need to say goodnight and go home.”

“What’s going on?” I hear Heidi say
behind us, with the baby in her arms.  I don’t know if I can bring myself to
call him Jared.  “I thought you were here to see the baby.”

My mother stands up.  “Let me hold
him, Heidi.”

Heidi takes a step back.  “No.”

My eyes widen.  “Heidi, what the
hell?  She would like to hold her grandson.”

Heidi shakes her head.  “No.  You
can’t hold him.  I invite you to see him, but he’s an infant.  You could get him
sick or-“

“She’ll wash her hands,” I say
sourly.  “Are you not going to let anyone touch him?”

“You two are drunk,” she says. 
“You’ve been drinking since you got here.  I don’t want you two around the baby
like this.”

“Bullshit,” I say, but realize I am
slightly slurring my speech.  “Let’s go Mother,” I say, standing up and putting
my hands on my mother’s shoulders to steady myself.  “Goodbye Heidi.  I hereby
rescind my offer to babysit.”

“Good,” Heidi says.  “Mother, as
always, thanks so much for coming and taking Leah’s side.  You are truly
predictable.”

“Excuse me?” I say, stepping back. 
“Taking my side?  Are you crazy?  For years all I heard about was how wonderful
you are and how well you married and how thin you are, when you’ve been making
yourself throw up for years and you married someone who can’t manage to grow a
pair so you can push him around as you please!”  I cringe, hearing the words
come out of my mouth and shout over Heidi’s shoulder into the other room.  “No
offense Jack, you’re great.”

“Thanks Leah,” he calls back,
obviously not wanting to stir the pot.  Heidi glares behind her shoulder, as
though Jack can see her.  He’s a smart man who knows better than to get in
between the words of three women. 

“And meanwhile,” Heidi continues. 
“You talk and talk and know absolutely nothing about what you’re saying, as
always.  You think Mom thinks I’m so wonderful?  You think Mom loves me more? 
Well you’re wrong, Leah.  You’re the one she’s been crying about for over ten
years.  You’re the one she talks about whenever I would see her and try and get
her to focus on me.  She loves you because you can…” She stops and I watch the
tears streaming down her face.  I’ve never seen Heidi break before, so this is
a new experience and I’m secretly enjoying it while at the same time, I feel
horrible.

“I can what, Heidi?” I say softly. 
“Because I can craft?  Because you can’t?  Are you jealous of me?”

“Stop it, Leah,” my mother says,
pulling me away.  I hadn’t realized I’m practically inches away from Heidi,
stooping down so my face is as level with hers as comfortably possible. 
“Enough from the both of you.  Leah, we’re going home.”  My mother takes my arm
and pulls me away, but before she gives me a good yank, I reach out and touch
the baby’s forehead with two fingers and I freeze, causing the pulling on my
arm to stop. 

My mother and I look right into
each other’s eyes and I hear a gasp, not sure if it’s coming from her or from
me.  “Eleanor,” I whisper.  I turn to face Heidi.  “You took Eleanor’s baby.”

The slap happens so quickly that I
feel the burn on my face before I realize what actually happened.  I stare at
my mother in shock at what she just did.  Heidi looks horrified. 

“Leah, you’re drunk,” my mother
declares.  “Heidi, I’m sorry.  We’re going now.”

Jack wanders into the kitchen where
I am standing and holding my cheek, horrified.  “Do you ladies need a ride
home?”

“No thank you Jack, I’m fine to
drive,” my mother says.  She yanks on my arm and pulls me out the front door so
fast that I barely have time to grab my jacket off of the coat hook.

The minute we are outside, she
releases her grip on my arm.  “What the hell did you slap me for?” I demand to
know, shrugging into my jacket.  “I’m not even that drunk.  How dare you?”

“Leah, get in the goddamn car right
now,” my mother snaps.  I know she’s serious if she’s swearing at me. 
Wordlessly I comply, getting into the passenger side of her silver Mercedes and
slamming my door shut.  She turns the car on and a blast of warm air provides
some relief for my freezing limbs.  I flip on the seat warmer, taking advantage
of the luxuries my mother’s car provides that Betsey does not.  My mother backs
out of Heidi’s driveway and begins heading home.  “I had to get us out of
there,” my mother says.

“You felt it too,” I say.  “I don’t
know how I knew, but when I touched him…the baby, I mean, it was like I could
feel Eleanor.  He’s her baby!  How could Heidi have taken Eleanor’s baby?”

“We don’t know that for sure,” my
mother replies, but she sounds unsure of her own statement.  “I felt it too,
though.  But you can’t just go shooting off accusations, Leah.  If that is
Eleanor and Andrew’s baby, Heidi could run off with him and Eleanor would have
no chance of seeing him again.  Do you understand?  This is serious.”

I nod.  “I’m sorry,” I agree.  “I
flew off the handle.”

“That’s why water and fire don’t
mix,” she says.  “But Leah, my god, I may not be sure about the baby, but I’m
pretty sure you’re a dual, and that could mean….” She trails off, her hand
fluttering to her throat where her black pearls sit against white skin.

“That could mean what, Mother?” I
say, eyes narrowing.

“It might be that Ash isn’t your
only catalyst,” she replies.  “I’ve seen it before.  Some people have none,
some have one, some have many.”  Her free hand twists her pearls nervously. 
“You should have stayed away from Blackwater, Leah.  This is only going to
cause your life to be hard, and I never wanted that for you.”

“Ash is my catalyst,” I say in a
steady voice.  “I have no doubt in my mind.”

“No, you’re absolutely right,” my
mother says, gracefully putting one jeweled hand over another to make a left
turn.  “But that doesn’t mean you don’t have another catalyst.”

I consider this.  The way I feel
with Ash when I’m with him – angry post-phone-sex moment aside, I don’t feel
like it’s possible to feel that way with anyone else.  It can’t be possible. 
He’s mine and I’m his, end of story.  Then I feel a panic attack coming on. 
“Could Ash have another catalyst?” I ask my mother.

“It’s possible,” she says. 
“Anything is possible.  Lisette Lavanne has had four husbands and crafter
children from every single one of those unions.  That means she’s had at least
four people who were her catalyst.  I’ve seen it happen, Leah.  It’s often
within the same family, too.”

“So Heidi could be Ash’s catalyst?”
I say, turning in shock to face my mother and feeling my heart pounding in my
throat.  “I’d kill her.”

“Leah, that’s ridiculous,” my
mother says.  “Heidi has no crafting ability whatsoever.  That’s why she’s jealous
of you.  She knows she can’t ever change that, and she married Jack.”

“I think I just peed myself.”

My mother reaches over to my side
of the car and switches the seat warmer switch off.  “You’re drunk.”

*

I practically crawl up the stairs
to my bedroom.  I’m feeling completely worn out from the day and the encounter
with Heidi.  Add the information my mother has given me, and I pretty much feel
like spending the rest of the night curled up in bed with some cheese popcorn
and a fresh bottle of wine.  My intent is to pass out gracefully drunk and wake
up and forget today happened.  Apparently my life has other plans.  I nearly
scream when I open the door to my bedroom and see Ash sitting on my bed. 
“Shhhhh,” he says, standing up and running over to me to cover my mouth.  “I
don’t want your mother shooting me on site.”

“You’re breaking and entering,” I
say, shutting the door behind me.  “Why shouldn’t she shoot you?”