Authors: Michelle Weidenbenner
After setting the backpack on the floor, I hurried to the closet at the far end of the room and wheeled out the hydraulic lift. Its wheels squeaked and rattled across the floor like they had when they’d put him in.
Kneeling in front of the crypt, I dug through my backpack until I found the rolled towel. Inside was the rosette key, the #22 retractable scalpel, a plastic bag for the body part, and the casket key. I reached for the rosette key first and poked the tool into the holes of the granite face until they clicked. One by one, I unlocked all four bolts and placed the supplies on the towel in front of the crypt.
Gripping the edges of the granite, I pulled the heavy stone out, sweat beads creeping down my temples. After maneuvering the block onto the towel, I slid it across the floor and out of the way.
As I positioned the lift, I rehearsed my steps: slice and save. No need to tourniquet this one, no vascular pressure. The movie played in my head over and over again. Fast forward, Rewind. Slice and save.
This would be better than when I put dog poo in his dinner, and spat in his coffee thermos. Taking a hold of the casket’s end, I rolled the wooden coffin toward me, out of the chute, and onto the lift. As it rolled toward me, my heartbeat drummed louder in my ears. The box slid over the scattered BBs rolling in the bottom of the drawer, clattering.
A car’s horn honked far in the distance. I glanced out into the cemetery, skimming the grounds. The dead slept. The voice in my head shouted.
Do it!
Moving back to the towel, I gathered the casket key, the scalpel, and the bag and faced the front of the coffin, placing the tools at my feet. I was ready to open the lid. I paused. What would he look like?
What did it matter? What was I waiting for?
One square hole was positioned at each end. I reached for the casket crank and inserted it into the left hole and turned, then the right.
Hopefully his eyes would be closed. If they were open I’d stare at his forehead—like I had before.
I lifted the top half first. The lid squeaked. My heart thumped tight. Holding my breath, I took one quick look, and dropped the lid.
Thud!
My stomach lurched. A white furry mold had grown over his graying skin. He was uglier than before. He wore a dark suit with a white shirt and a red striped tie. His hands rested on his middle, holding a rosary. What a joke.
Too bad he couldn’t watch me now.
Don’t look at his face
.
My eyelid twitched as I lifted the lid again and set the corner hinge to a locked position. Then I lifted the bottom half of the casket, avoiding his eyes, and set the lock there too.
When I unfastened the belt around his trousers, the belt buckle clinked and my fingers trembled. Clumsily, I undid the button at the top. Stooping over him, I yanked his pants down to his thighs, exposing his nakedness. I bounced on my toes and laughed. Loud. My heart thumped in my ears, keeping rhythm. He was shriveled. I clapped and laughed again, the deep sound muffling off the room’s walls.
I reached for the scalpel and the bag and deployed the blade, lifted his dick, and sliced with one quick movement.
Aaaargh.
In one fluid motion it was gone and in my gloved hand. My head spun like when I twirled in circles. I felt light, almost numb.
All he had left was a stub.
I giggled like a child and held the flesh up for the tombstone people to see. “Look!”
With a smile, I placed it in the bag and pinched my fingers along the top, sealing it shut.
After retracting the blade, I set it on the towel, opened the backpack, and took out the sealed container. I placed the plastic bag inside, secured the lid, and placed it in the backpack.
Laughing, I moved back to the body, pulled up his pants, buttoned the top, and fastened his belt. The laugh started low in my belly and escalated into a high-pitched wail as memories of him touching me, damaging me, came flooding back. Years of pent up anger boiled inside me. He’d dragged me out of the toolshed and into the house. I’d kicked and curled into a ball, but still he came at me.
Now, grunting, I balled my hands into fists and beat his chest.
Thud
.
Again.
Thud.
Again and again until my fists burned. I inhaled and exhaled deeply, then released the hinges of the casket and dropped each lid with a bang, suddenly in a hurry.
Who’s the big man now
?
After locking the coffin, I rolled it back into place, slid the granite face across the floor and lifted it to the opening. The anger gave me strength.
The casket clanked and clattered back into place. I scooped the rosette key from the towel and refastened the hardware. An opera sang in my head, the singers’ voices getting louder and louder, keeping rhythm with my heartbeat.
Gathering my supplies, I put everything back into their place in the backpack, wheeled the lift back into the closet, took out the antibacterial wipes in my bag, and wiped down the floor. I flung the pack over my shoulder and onto my back, then glanced around the room. No mess.
Once outside, I shone the flashlight on the lock and left it the same way I found it.
When that was complete, I flipped my flashlight off and began my trek to the cache site, counting the rows and stones. The drums of the concert played their final beats, and my mind went quiet. I glanced at my watch. I was on time.
There was much to do. I needed to keep to my schedule. I shuffled out of the cemetery, mumbling in rhythm. Find. The. Cache. Box. Bury. The. Stub. Find the cache box. Bury the stub. Find the cache box. Bury the stub.
#
The night’s darkness surrounded Jake as he stumbled up the porch stairs of his rented bungalow on Ditch Road in Hursey Lake. He mumbled under his breath. “Damn broken boards. Shit-ass landlord doesn’t fix a pissant thing.”
He reached out in front of him, waving his hand in the air, searching for the door handle. “Should have left the blasted light on.” His fingernail clinked on the metal knob. He turned it, murmuring under his breath, “At least I left the sucker unlocked.”
He pushed the door open, practically falling into the living room. After he flipped on the lights, he headed to the bathroom, relieved himself, then crossed the hall to his bedroom—a small room with one window. Beer bottles cluttered the dresser. Dirty clothes lay in heaps, scattered on the floor. Photos of naked girls flashed on his computer screen saver.
He chuckled. “Too drunk to get it up now.”
The room spun as he sat on the edge of the bed and bent to pull off his jeans. His foot caught in the pant leg. He kicked it and fell backward onto the pillow, laughing. Trying to focus, he pulled the other leg out and threw his jeans onto the floor. He closed his eyes, welcoming sleep’s abandon. It didn’t take long.
Sometime later, he stirred at a sound in the room, but his eyes, too heavy to open, remained shut. He didn’t care about the sound. It was probably his imagination. He allowed himself to drift again until something soft and damp fell onto his face, covering his eyes, nose, and mouth.
His eyes flew open. Who was there? But he couldn’t see the intruder. Gasping, he tried to sit, clawing at the hands of the attacker, struggling to rip the fabric from his face. But hands stronger than his held it in place. Sucking air, he breathed in the only thing he could—the cloth’s sweet sickly scent. Desperate for fresh air but finding none, he succumbed to unconsciousness.
When Jake finally woke, the light of a new day had trickled into his room, spilling its brightness across his face. But he didn’t notice. The searing, burning pain in his groin demanded all his attention. His hands groped between his legs. What the hell? Sticky blood covered his fingertips. Moaning, he turned his head and vomited on the pillow.
He tried to sit, blinking the blurriness out of his eyes. The room spun. He looked down.
His pecker was gone.
In its place was a short fleshy stub, the end clamped shut with knotted rubber strip. Blood had pooled around him, soaking the bedspread.
The walls of the room echoed with his screams before he passed out.
Chapter Two
No morning felt the same without Quinn tickling his ear, the breath of her tiny voice saying, “Wake up, Daddy.”
Brett stared at the ceiling. A leaky faucet dripped, gnawing at his nerves. He needed to get up and get going, but without his daughter, he dawdled. It was like the air didn’t move. The empty apartment reminded him of how alone he was and how unfair the courts had been.
What kind of screwed-up justice system did he work for anyway? He knew the answer: a system that sided with mothers—even addict mothers.
He needed to let it go, but worry had a mind of its own. His fists clenched. Quinn wasn’t safe with Ali, but the judge only saw a hot-tempered man, not a drug-addicted mother. Of course he was ticked—what father wouldn’t be at a mother who neglected her child?
He dragged his body out of bed and into the shower, trying to scrub his negative thoughts away and wash them down the drain. After he towel-dried, he dressed in his uniform, stepped into his navy-colored pants, and tightened the belt around his waist to the next notch. Anxiety as a diet had a way of loosening a man’s pants.
Guess I should have eaten the last piece of pizza last night
. He buttoned his shirt, strapped on his belt holster, removed the gun from the locked drawer, and slid the firearm in place.
His phone rang, playing “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.” Quinn’s ring, the one he’d programmed to play whenever she called because she was his twinkling star.
He lunged for his cell on his bed and held it to his ear. “Quinn?”
“Daddy?” Her voice quivered. “I’m scared. Mommy won’t wake up.”
His heart raced as he willed his voice to stay calm. “Are you home?”
“Yes.”
“Go lock the front door.” He slid into his socks, crossing the room in one sweep, fear squeezing his heart. At the closet, he slipped into his shoes, fumbling with the phone as he bent to tie the laces. Could he get to her in time or should he call 911?
“Okay.”
He could hear her breathing like she was moving to the door. In three steps, he dashed across the room to the kitchen and clutched his jacket hanging over the chair. He juggled the phone again as he shoved his arms into the sleeves, first one, then the other. “Sit next to Mommy, and I’ll be there soon. I’m going to my car now. I’m coming. Everything is going to be okay.”
But it wouldn’t. This had happened before, and it would happen again.
Once upon a time he would have called Child Protective Services, but not now. He couldn’t wait. They were overworked. It could take them up to seventy-two hours to investigate, and he didn’t trust anyone but himself. No one cared about Quinn the way he did.
He grabbed his keys off the counter and headed out his front door, still holding the phone to his ear. “Is Max with you?”
“He’s sniffing the garbage. I think he’s hungry.”
Blast it, Ali
. She’d probably forgotten to feed him.
Brett climbed in his cruiser and reached for his sunglasses tucked in the visor. He talked to Quinn as he started the car. “You did good, calling me. I’m sure Mommy will get up soon, but I’ll come and fix you breakfast. Do you have eggs and milk in the fridge?”
He envisioned her feet pattering on the tile and thought he heard the refrigerator squeaking open. “Uh-huh.”
That’s a shock.
But that was Ali—seemingly together in one way, but not in another.
Brett clicked on his flashers, ignoring the speed limit signs as he sped down Wooster Road. Ali’s house was on the other side of the highway, but close. Moments like that made him thankful Hursey Lake was a small town.
“I’ll be there soon. Don’t open the door for anyone except me, okay?” He turned the steering wheel with one hand and held the phone to his ear with the other.
“Okay, Daddy.”
Drivers pulled into the right lane and slowed when they saw him coming. After a few turns and red lights, he shut off his flashers and swung the car into the driveway next to Ali’s red beater and slammed the car into Park.
On his way to the front door, he scowled as he stomped over cigarette butts littering the concrete, the filters crunching beneath his feet. The lawn needed mowing, and the shrubs had grown spindly and wild. When he’d lived there he’d never let the house get that run-down. The screen door stood ajar, the bottom bent at an angle, not allowing it to close properly. It squeaked in a faint breeze. The landlord had never been good about fixing things.
As he fumbled for the right key, he sucked in a deep breath.
Keep your temper
. He wasn’t supposed to be here, but keeping Quinn safe was worth violating the protective order. Besides, Ali had lied. He’d never hit her. Her brother was the one who’d pushed her to lie. And the judge had believed her—not Brett.
Max barked on the other side of the door. “Quinn, it’s Daddy.” He turned the key and pushed open the door. At least Ali hadn’t changed the locks.
Quinn stood before him in bare feet, wearing a pink T-shirt and purple shorts, holding her stuffed lamb she called Lambie under her arm. Her dark curls hung over her dirty face, tear streaks leaving a line of clean skin. Snot dripped from her nose.
He knelt in front of her, scooped her into his arms, and held her to his chest, breathing in her sweet smell, not wanting to let her go. He kissed her cheeks. “Shhh, I’m here now.”
Quinn hiccupped like she’d been crying hard. Her arms closed around his neck, almost choking him.
Brett’s throat grew tight, and he squeezed his eyes shut, fighting the rage bubbling inside him. How could Ali ignore her child?
Max’s tail thumped against the wall. Brett rested Quinn on one leg and nestled the dog’s face in his arms, rubbing his ears. Max whined in rhythm to his wagging tail.
“Where’s Mommy?”
“She’s on the couch.” Quinn pointed to their right. Garbage-filled bags sat on the floor along the wall outside the kitchen, smelling like Max had crapped nearby.