Called Up (22 page)

Thinking it would probably be better to avoid any pre-meeting-hanging-out conversation with Nate, Deke spent the next forty-five minutes in the office taking care of some bookkeeping, even allowing himself a few moments of thinking about what it would be like if they did come clean. If they were an official couple, her running the foundation from the back office while he ran the bar. Yeah, he was pretty sure he could get into that idea.

Because there was too much food to carry, Josh was taking it over on a cart, which left Deke to go over some last minute things with the kitchen staff before heading over to the library. He ran into Lola and Jules as they were going into the building.

“So do you know why we’re here?” Lola asked as they got to the top of the stairs.

He didn’t in fact. Because Fitz lived at Lola’s, he obviously couldn’t spend the night with her. And Lola was too perceptive for Fitz to spend too many nights away. Since they spent pretty much all the rest of their time with Wash, Jason, Dorie and/or occasionally Tuck, there wasn’t much opportunity to talk. By the time they were alone together, conversation was the last thing on their minds.

Lola and Jules didn’t need to know any of that, of course. Nor would it be unusual for him to shrug and say, “No clue,” since he rarely felt a need to ask. But, well... What
was
she working on so much? It was still like pulling teeth to get her to give details on anything, much less something he hadn’t come out and asked about.

Well, details on anything other than sex. She had no problems talking about all sorts of things there. She was remarkably open about that.

About everything else? No.

It was actually beginning to bother him a little bit.

Especially when he walked into the room and saw her standing at the head of it, her eyes all sparkly and bright as she smiled at something Nate said. Nate was leaning back against the table with Dorie settled up against him, her back to his front. And Sam was standing there right with them, his arms across his chest and his head bent down and tilted toward Fitz as he listened intently to what she was saying.

Yeah, Deke was definitely bothered by that. And that was before Josh brought Fitz the bill for the meal that had just been set up. It wasn’t the handing of the bill that was the problem, of course. Rather it was the way Josh smiled down at her as she took it and signed for everything and the way she smiled right back. Deke felt irritation rise up through his chest and it took everything he had not to let it escape.

It wasn’t like they needed to declare their everlasting love or anything like that. But, hell. he’d slept with Peggy maybe ten times in the last few years and pretty much every living soul in Inspiration over the age eighteen was well aware of that fact. He’d never snuck around behind closed doors before and he was finding he really didn’t like it. They were sleeping together. So what? They were both consenting adults. It shouldn’t matter to anyone else.

And now he hesitated. If she were any other woman in the world, he’d have already gone over to her; he definitely would have with any other woman he’d slept with. He’d never had a problem with the way he was with women because he honestly didn’t give a shit. His body wasn’t sacred. They were welcome to whatever they wanted to take on that front. But they didn’t get his heart or his head.

So maybe the problem he was having at the moment was that Fitz was the first woman he’d ever been with who had all three—and he wasn’t allowed to tell anyone he had even a little part of her.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Fitz knew the second Deke walked in the room.

She was showing Sam the parts of the presentation that might end up being relevant to his foundation, and she actually stuttered for a second before deliberately turning her back to the doorway and looking down at her laptop. Not reacting outwardly to Deke whatsoever was getting harder to do with each passing day, especially when her reaction tended to be as obvious as it was uncontrollable.

“You’re thinking about how many scholarships?”

Sam. Laptop screen. Right.

“Our goal for now is fifty percent, although ultimately we’d love to bring that up to a hundred,” she answered.

“Ambitious,” he nodded.

“Have you ever known Nate to think small?” she asked.

Crisis averted. She paged to the next slide, trying to decide whether she should just come out and ask if this was part of her interview. Except someone might overhear her and since she already knew it wouldn’t go over well, she at least wanted Deke to be the one she told first. But other than a vague “things are moving forward and we’ll be in touch soon” type statement, Sam hadn’t even talked about the job, so saying anything might be bad on that front, too.

Goddamn it. She would be a lot more comfortable if she was wearing underwear at the moment. Well, if she could manage this, she’d have absolutely no problem with the interview.

Fitz looked up at Nate and smiled at whatever he’d just said and then realized Josh was standing in front of her with the bill for dinner. She gave him a smile, too, remembering not to be a total imbecile in time to say, “Thanks.”

“Any time,” he answered. “Deke said you or Jason could settle up tomorrow but you’d need this for your records.”

She wondered if her skin actually flushed at the sound of Deke’s name or if that heat was all internal. Hopefully the latter. “Sounds good.” And although there was no need whatsoever, as soon as Josh left, she went over to check the trays of food in order to have a minute to pull herself together.

All of her cells snapped to attention right before Deke said quietly into her ear, “I am one hundred percent sure none of this tastes as good as you do.”

She whirled around, hissing, “You did not just say that!” as a look of complete innocence came over his face and he smiled over her shoulder.

“Hi, Mama Gin,” he said.

“Max,” she said, wrapping her arm around him and giving him a hug. After turning to Fitz and doing the same, she asked, “So do I get a hint about why I’ve been invited tonight?”

Things had been remarkably easy with Mama Gin since the night at the bar. They’d talked about Fitz’s father a few times since then; Mama Gin had even come out to the cemetery one afternoon. It was wonderful and strange all at the same time. Another new normal. But not what Fitz should be thinking about now, either.

Happy to have an excuse to put some distance between her and Deke, Fitz smiled brightly. “Nope.” Then she turned to the assembled group. “Why doesn’t everyone grab some dinner so we can get started.”

Between Deke, having Sam here unexpectedly, and the meeting itself, dinner wasn’t even a possibility, so Fitz took full advantage of the fifteen minutes to go through the presentation one more time. When everyone was finally settled, she looked around the room. There was nothing to be nervous about. These were the people she loved most in the world: Nate and Dorie; Jason and Wash; Ella, Jules, Lola and Mama Gin. Even Tuck was there today.

And, of course, Deke.

Her gaze lingered on him, despite how dangerous it was. The slow smile he gave her now was as soothing as that amazing drawl of his, the whispered, “Angel,” in the middle of the night. She looked down at her notes, not even caring she had the same grin on her face that he wore on his.

“Thanks, everyone, for coming tonight,” she said. “I know we’re a larger group than usual. What we have to say will impact everyone so we want to give you a chance to put the brakes on now.”

And since she wanted this as much as Nate did, she hoped they’d see the good in it, too. With a nod, she handed it over to Nate.

He wasn’t nervous like she was—at least not visibly so. She was kind of happy, though, to see that he needed some fortification, too. Or at least that’s how she was reading Dorie’s smile and squeeze of his hand before he stood up and took Fitz’s place and then launched right into it.

“So I guess this is kind of my dress rehearsal for officially announcing my retirement from baseball after next season.”

Although it wasn’t the surge of reporters jumping forward as it would be on the actual day, he’d definitely gotten everyone’s attention. “I’m of course hoping,” he said, “the rest of this season will be as good as the first half was, and that next year will be the same. But even if not, I’ve had a good run and I’d rather go out on a high note than be one of those guys who doesn’t know when to pack it in.” He glanced down at Dorie and brightened visibly when she smiled. “Plus, now that I’ve been spending more time in Inspiration again, it’s clear to me that someone needs to start talking sense around here. I mean, Christ, just the other day someone said to me that if Mom decides to stop running for mayor one day, Deke might actually be next in line.”

That got Deke’s attention. He even seemed flustered for a minute, which he shouldn’t be. As far as Fitz was concerned, it was a role he’d been born to play. But, per usual, he made a joke. “Must have been Si. He’ll do anything to ride in that convertible for the Founders Day parade.”

Everyone laughed, of course, because that was something Si had been pretty vocal about after Jules’s kids got to ride with Mama Gin last year. But Deke was the only one who seemed even halfway surprised when Mama Gin smiled as she leaned forward and said, “Actually, Max, that would have been me. But we can talk about that later.”

Obviously happy to have facilitated that little bomb being dropped, Nate brought the attention back up to the front of the room. “As you all know, Johnny Whitfield will be in town to tape his show in a few weeks. I’ll make the official announcement then. And since I expect he’ll want to know what I’m planning to do next, I thought it would be the perfect platform to, well...” He nodded at Fitz before sitting back down.

Which was her cue to stand up. “We actually have two things to talk about today.” She dimmed the lights and pulled up her presentation, the first slide of which was the Iowa Dream Foundation logo. “One of the reasons Johnny is coming to Inspiration is because he loved the story behind the foundation, and he loved even more what we’ve done with it.” Because, yes, after Deke had pulled her away from Johnny that day in San Francisco, thereby prompting the conversation with Nate, it had come back full circle to Johnny again. “But as we talked, both Nate and I realized we’ve got things running really well here at home.”

“
You’ve
got things running well at home,” Nate interjected. And thanks to the chorus of cheers now it was Fitz who was flustered, unused to such enthusiastic praise. Also a little irritated, because she had a feeling that was Nate’s way of pushing her to stay. She was pretty sure the only reason he was supportive of her ideas to expand the foundation was because he thought it would keep her there. But even that would be a big change, given what she was about to propose.

“Um, thanks,” she mumbled before picking up where she’d left off. “Last week I spent some time talking to Nate’s friends in Chicago and it turns out there are more than a few of them who like what we’re doing, too, and who would love to be a part of it. With their investments and Jason’s talent, we could begin branching out and helping other towns that may have been hard hit in the same way Inspiration was with the tornado.” A mission she believed in wholeheartedly, but that also gave her a way out of Inspiration even if she didn’t get Sam’s foundation job. As Fitz spoke, Dorie distributed folders to each of the official board members. “This will mean a change of bylaws and mission, of course, so it will need a board vote.”

Carefully not looking at Sam because she was afraid she’d screw it up, she also, as agreed upon, added, “The reason Sam is here tonight is because he was part of the initial conversation and because he’s been in the exploration stages of starting a private foundation of his own, which, incidentally, hasn’t yet been publicly announced and therefore needs to stay in this room.” And whether it was officially part of her job interview or not, she knew he was paying close attention to everything she was doing tonight, including how well she stuck to the script.

“He’s interested in being one of those investors,” she said. “Because this is a pretty major change, we thought we’d put it out there for you to begin thinking about. We’ll have another board meeting next week so we can answer questions and talk it through.” She glanced down at Nate, waiting for his nod before continuing, “Then there’s this next part.”

She nodded to Dorie so the second round of folders could be distributed. “If we do end up expanding the foundation’s mission, it will take up some of Nate’s newly freed time because it will be partly up to him to drum up investors. But he’d like to spend most of his time here in Inspiration running the—” she brought up the next slide “—Iowa Dream Academy.”

Having some kids come out to play sports during the summer wasn’t a stretch. The scale of it, however, was obvious on the slide. And since it bordered Wash’s land, not to mention the land and the farmhouse that Lola had had her eyes on since she was a kid, there were definitely going to be questions.

“Before I go forward, I want to say we are well aware that this would have an impact on everyone in the room whether personally,” like with Wash and Lola, “professionally,” like with the increased demand on city services and resources that Mama Gin and Tuck would have to deal with, “or both. So the packets you have present three options, ranging from a year-round operation that brings kids of all ages here from all over the country for both academics and athletics, down to a much more basic, summer-only baseball and basketball camp.”

She spent the next half hour going through the various plans, including financial projections, architectural drawings and the various lists of people Nate wanted involved. Knowing they’d thrown a whole heck of a lot at everyone, she closed with, “We understand this could change the entire landscape of Inspiration. And we know that, even if every single one of you here is fully on board with the project, we’d still have a long way to go in terms of approval from the town.” It did occur to her that she might not be part of that “we,” but that wasn’t something she chose to dwell on.

“Therefore, the only way we’d move forward with the full-scale option is if we have complete agreement from everyone in this room. And since it’s a lot to take in, not to mention a lot to ask, each packet includes an anonymous ballot addressed to the foundation’s mailbox with a simple vote: ‘Option One’ for the full-scale, ‘Two’ for in-between, or ‘Three’ for the scaled down version. We only go with Option One if it’s unanimous. If that’s not the case, then we go with one of the lesser versions and Nate gets an actual retirement.”

No one even smiled at that, which Fitz didn’t think was a good sign, but they were definitely looking through the materials, so who knew? She wasn’t sure how to take it, though, when Deke sat back in his chair and looked at her and then Nate. “With the full-scale option, who in this room is directly involved?”

From the way he asked, she couldn’t tell whether he was leaning toward it or against it so her heart was pounding even more than usual when she brought up the org chart she and Nate had spent an entire plane ride talking through. Their ideal roster, as Nate had called it, would include Jason being the main advisor on academics, Wash on community collaboration, and Deke on—

“Youth and family programming?” he asked, shaking his head and laughing. “That’s a joke, right? I mean, I’m a freaking
bartender
.”

Since he seemed to be the only one in the room who didn’t see himself as more than that, no one else laughed. He sat back and cocked his head. “What? You need someone to drive one of those trains around the whole place and to keep the rest of the family occupied while little Jimmy plays baseball?”

Nate, who made clear how unhappy he was with Deke every time Fitz brought his name up, sat back in his chair. “I love that.”

Managing not to give him an I-told-you-so slap on the shoulder, Fitz couldn’t help but give a smug smile. It was exactly why she’d insisted. Whatever anyone else could do, Deke would take it somewhere no one else had thought of. “Any other questions?”

She and Nate fielded some easy ones, as did Jason. Even Wash and Lola seemed interested, if not overly enthusiastic. Although Lola did seem to be genuinely smiling when she sighed and said, “So I guess it really is time for me to find an actual nanny.”

To Fitz’s surprise, that threw her more than anything else that had come up. “Um... No, I don’t think so.” They were still months away from any of this.

Which only made Lola laugh before gently saying, “Fitz, you do realize that if this all goes through, everything in your life changes. I mean, you’d be the one in charge of all this, right?”

“Um... Well...” Fitz looked down at Nate, but he was no help. In fact, as Fitz began to answer, “Not really,” he leaned forward and spoke over her, saying, “I’d like her to be.” His gaze shifted first to Sam, then to her with a completely neutral look on his face while somehow still making his opinion entirely clear.

Having Sam there didn’t help, of course. Hell, maybe if he’d done anything other than sit back with an equally bland expression, Fitz might have come out and said something. But with both of them just sitting there, she realized that she was totally on her own here. As always. And since she was well used to it by now, it should have been something she could easily handle. Instead, and for the first time in years—since the moment she’d realized she’d never see her parents again—she felt actual panic. She couldn’t breathe.

She hoped to God it wasn’t obvious. She could
not
lose her shit here, at her
job
. Not in front of Sam
,
of all people.