Can't Touch This (11 page)

She stirred a few times during the night to find herself
held tightly in Cass’s embrace. Waking to sun streaming through the window, she
eyed Castle wearing a pair of white cotton pants. He stood still as a statue
gazing through the glass.

“Morning, darlin’.” He never turned.

“How’d you know I was awake?”

“Your breathing changed.” He shrugged. “I’ll know many
things about you the more I take your blood in the years to come.” Cass turned
to face her. “You’ll know as much about me.”

Harlow remembered tasting his blood, and though it had a
metallic taste similar to hers, there was something else, something exotic and
sweet. “Something is changing in me, isn’t it?”

“Yes.” He rested his hip against the sill. “You’ll never be
what I am, but you will live until I die.”

“What?”

“You’ll live until the day I die.”

“Cass, how old are you?”

“Young by shifter standards. I’ll live another two or three
hundred years.”

“Lord!” She shook her head. “But that’s not an answer.”

“I was born in the year seventeen hundred and twenty-one.”

“My God!”

“Do I look elderly?”

“No, but-but two hundred and ninety-three!”

“Harlow, you’re making me
feel
old.”

“And you’re telling me I’ll live as long as you do?”

“If you keep taking my blood.”

“If I stop?”

“You’ll live a normal human life span.”

“Children?”

“They’ll carry my genes.” He stared at her and continued.
“They’ll be born as children but they’ll have my abilities to shift at will.”

“Why would I die if you did?”

“Humans are inherently weaker and… Shit, Harlow, you would
die from a broken heart.”

“But if I die first?”

He shrugged. “Animals are resilient, I would go on, possibly
find another mate.”

“Would you look for one?”

He walked away from the window and came to sit on the bed
beside her. “Harlow, the answer to that question today is no.”

“You care that much?”

Castle gathered her in his arms. “More, darlin’, much more.”

The sadness in his voice reached deep inside her, triggered
something instinctive—the will to live. “I won’t die and leave you.”

“Say it again.”

“I’d never leave you, Castle.”

“I wanted to hear those words.”

“If I had chosen differently?”

“I’d love you every minute I have you.”

“Love me?”

“I am speaking English, honey.” He grinned. “Is there
another language you would understand better because I do know a few.” He
lavished her with bits. “
Je t’aime
is French.
Te amo
in Spanish.”
He kissed the side of her neck. “Or
te deseo
—I desire you,” he whispered
in between licking and nipping her vein. “I know other ways to show I love
you.”

“What other ways?”

“God, woman.”

“Cass, I lo—”

The sound of glass breaking followed by a loud crash that
seemed to shake the house on its foundation set him in motion. “Son of a
bitch.”

Harlow spoke to his back as he raced through the door. “I
love you too,” she whispered.

* * * * *

“Damn it to hell, Esau, why are you letting them fuck up my
house?” He kicked pieces of the window and its frame into a corner as he glared
out to see two big wolves roll across his long Southern-style porch, leaving
trails of blood.

“I’m tired, Castle, tired of worrying about what’s right for
us, which path we should take. I want to be free.”

He took a good look at the much older alpha. He did look
worn. “How long have you felt this way?”

“Long enough.” He shook his head. “I don’t have a son so I’m
waiting for Fia to choose her mate, nothing more.”

A thud shook the porch as the beasts banged against a stone
pillar before tumbling down steps to the ground. A pain-ridden howl followed.
“Shit, I’ve got to handle this.”

“Cass, you’ve straddled the line between wolf and human so
long you’ve forgotten what they’re doing is driven by pure instinct and will
end with one standing at Fia’s side as alpha.”

Esau was right.

Hell, they pretended to be men, some didn’t even change and
run anymore, yet instinctively, when pushed into a corner, they came out
howling. Nothing negated the fact they were animals, wild, unruly creatures who
happened to possess the power to change at will and pretend to be something
they were not. Cass stepped through the debris and outside. He watched Hatch
and Sawyer tear each other to shreds in his driveway, knowing his second needed
to do this, but it wounded him to watch his friend get hurt. The days of
fighting Hatch’s battles had long ago passed. He glanced down the porch and
there stood Fia beside another column biting the back of her hand.

“Fia?”

“He has to win, Cass. He
must
win.” Her eyes were
full of tears yet the air was rife with her scent of womanhood, making it
difficult for Castle to discern which beast earned her tears. He figured they
were for Hatch or she’d have mated with Saw long ago.

He smelled Harlow before he saw her. “Harli, stay inside.”
Too late.

“What…oh God!”

“It’s natural for our kind.”

“Stop them, Castle; they’re ripping each other apart.”

“No!” Fia yelled. She twisted and looked at Harlow. “Leave
what you don’t understand alone.”

“I understood one thing after spending an evening with Hatch
Grisom. He loves you, and he’s one hell of a man.”

She kept her brown eyes on Harlow, and Cass watched closely
as they turned various shades of yellow. “You think I don’t know that?” Her
shoulders stiffened. “I love him so much it hurts, but he has to do this. He
needs to prove he’s worthy of me.”

“The man is…”

“Hatch is
not
a man, he’s a wolf.”

Castle saw the realization of what Fia said settle over
Harlow, who trembled as she eyed him. “Is this what our children would be
subjected to?”

“No.”

“Why? Why is it different for the two of them; why must they
rip each other to pieces?”

“A daughter would be born alpha just as Fia is. She will
choose a mate who is strong enough to protect her and the pack.” He walked over
and rested hands on her shoulders. “Just as I have chosen a mate strong enough
to sit at my side. That’s how it is, honey.” He drew her closer. “But if it is
a boy, there would be days as a leader he would be subjected to the same
savagery. He will fight to show his strength and supremacy again and again if
he wishes to rule the pack.”

Harlow pushed Cass away and studied him. “You would do this
to another?”

“I have done worse.” He refused to soften his words. “And I
will again.”

A loud howl shook the treetops, snatching their attention.
Castle breathed a sigh of relief to see Hatch’s wolf straddling Sawyer who lay
battered and bloody in the dirt. The beaten animal would mend and live. Still,
his gaping wounds were disturbing to see. When Hatch raised his head a second
time and howled, the message was clear—he was champion. Fia’s shoulders
straightened as air huffed from her. The love in her eyes filled Cass with joy
for his friend, and saddened him that he’d lost his second to Esau’s pack.

Hatch loped to the porch, mounted the steps, and stalked to
where Fia stood before flopping onto his belly. She sat down beside him and
hugged the wolf’s neck. Hatch growled quietly, declaring the she-wolf as his.

“Fi, walk him to the lake, stay with him while he mends.”

“Cass, he needs a doctor.”

“Harli, by this time tomorrow you won’t see a single scar.
However, while they’re fresh, they hurt like hell.” Cass waited, knowing she
would ask more questions.

“Will he change back?”

“Not until he heals.” He knew what was coming before she
opened her mouth.

“I can’t do this, Cass, I can’t.”

“And I can’t keep making you feel warm and fuzzy about what
I am, damn it.”

Esau touched his arm. “She needs time, Castle. She’s like
Fi’s mother. Humans need so much more time.”

Harlow jerked toward Esau. “Like Fi’s mother? She was a
human?” Cass watched her turn eyes to Fia cresting the hill beside her wolf.
She pivoted to stare at Cass. “That’s what Hatch meant at my place when he said
she was different.”

“Yes.” Cass watched as Esau went to render assistance to
Sawyer.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You weren’t ready to hear what a female child of ours would
be like.”

“What do you mean?”

“I live in two worlds, Harlow. I’d want her to have freedom
in both.”

Harli said, “It’s what Jeremiah meant in LA when he said you
would have to decide which side you stood on.”

“Jeremiah and many of the wolves in his service don’t know
the thrill of running free.” Cass filled his lungs with air, hoping it would
calm the frantic animal inside. “You witnessed how much Fia understands the
life a wolf leads. She’s from a line choosing not to live among humans. She
shifts if she wants to or when it’s necessary. Otherwise, she’s pack through
and through.” He observed how Harlow digested what she heard thus far before
telling her the worse part. “Had Sawyer won, it’s who she’d go to. A true
mate’s scent can be eradicated by an alpha wolf.”

“Mates don’t always come together? How did we…”

“You fucking bit me. We don’t share our blood with humans,
darlin’.
We
bite them.” He shrugged. “Had I not straddled both worlds, I
wouldn’t have found you.”

“I’m married.”

“Not for long, I’m seeing to that personally.” He shrugged.
“No human bond is strong enough to keep you from me now.” He tilted his head.
“You should also know that my wolf would shred me from inside out if I ever
hurt you more than you desired.”

“Jesus, Castle, I’m not sure I can be as strong as Fia.”

“I’ll see to it you are even stronger because I’m asking you
for more.” Castle sat against the railing. “I can’t leave you, nor can I let
you go.” He held his hand out. “I’m asking you to live with me in both worlds.”

“What if I need more time?”

“I’ll wait.”

“For how long?”

“As long as it takes. My wolf needs you.” He continued to
proffer his hand, hoped she would take it. “
I
need you more than
anything in the world.”

“I love you.”

“I know.” He stared at her.

“You’ll always be there even though I can’t run with you?”

“Every fucking day.” He smiled. “Unless you’re at work.”
Harlow deserved to understand everything. “You’ll eventually have to give that
up so people close to you won’t notice you don’t age.” It was one reason his
kind chose to live in major cities surrounded by millions of people who
provided much needed camouflage. “Those who live as humans move constantly.”
The mischievous light in her eyes told him Harlow intended to search for a way
around that problem.

“How have you done it at The Moat?”

“Most people stop hanging out in clubs when they reach
middle age. Those who don’t aren’t seeking the type of atmosphere I provide in
my place. They can be swayed to stay away if necessary.” It made him happy she
didn’t intend to bend to his will so easily. “Controlling you will be a
challenge serving only to heighten my desires.” Cass grasped a handful of hair
and drew her close enough to kiss. “In the end, you’ll do whatever I ask.”

Harlow untangled his fingers and entwined them with hers.
“And I’ll always be yours.”

“Oh, I know that.” He grinned. “I want to make love to you.”

“Right now?”

He laughed at surprise sparkling in her green and brown
eyes. “Harli, get used to the fact that I’m no better than a dog, and I’m
usually damn horny.”

“I hadn’t thought about that.” Her cheeks reddened. “Will I
feel that way the more of your blood I consume?”

Cass nodded.

“Are you sure you’re not a vampire?”

“Hell and damnation, woman, I am
not
a fucking blood
sucker. Keep asking and I’ll introduce you to one.”

“Do they really exist?”

“What do you think?”

“Can you really find one to explain…”

“Harlow!”

“What?”

He snatched her up and carried her over the threshold. “I
want to fuck you until you scream my name.”

“Is that all?”

“I crave so much more.”

“Tell me.” Her eyes darkened and he loved the way she gazed
at him.

“I want you on your knees, tonight. I want you shackled to
my bed naked and begging.”

“I need to know something.”

“Ask me anything.”

“Who was the room for?” She tilted her head. “You own my
body, Castle, but I’m human; I must know I mean everything to you.”

He set her feet on the floor and took her hand. “Come with
me.” He led her through the kitchen and down the stairs to the garage. “Where
are we going?”

“You’ll see.” Stopping in front of a big door in the corner,
he pulled out a keychain that held two gold keys. Taking one off, he handed it
to her and said, “This is yours. Unlock it.”

His eyes never left her face as she turned the key and
pushed the door open. “Oh…uhh,
damn!
This is huge.” He noticed her
multicolored eyes light up with curiosity when they touched on various items in
the room. She peered up and sucked in her breath when she noticed the ceiling
of the room was glass. “Lord, I didn’t see this from the outside.”

“It’s flanked by trees.”

“The moon will shine in every night.” A naughty smile curled
her inviting lips. “I suppose you’ll get hornier during a full moon.”

“Part of the reason it’s soundproof.” He swatted her bottom.
“Guests won’t hear me growl at you.” The wolf inside howled with joy and Castle
looked forward to releasing the beast later to truly celebrate their mating.

“So many, many things to play with.”

“This room, and the one in Big Bear, were built for you.” He
observed her closely. “I cut that key for you.”