Capturing the Cowboy's Heart (15 page)

Trudging tiredly out to the kitchen, she poured herself a glass of juice and then fixed herself two slices of buttered toast. 

Glancing out the kitchen window, she caught sight of Cade standing in the corral.  She stood there, mesmerized by his every move.  But the moment he
noticed
her watching him, she turned and walked away. 

Out of sight, in this instance, didn’t necessarily mean out of mind.

When she
had
finished eating, Lacy stepped out onto the back porch to get
Domino
’s food and water bowls.  After filling one with fresh water and the other with a large scoop
ful
of food, she carried them back out to the porch. 

Still n
o sign of
Domino
, but at least she had managed to do one of the jobs Cade had given her without screwing it up.  Now for the real work.  She headed for the barn. 

“Hello?
” she called out as she stepped inside.  “
Anyone in here?”

“Mornin’.”  Burk’s head appeared over the edge of the loft above her.  “How’s it going?”

“Okay, I guess.”

“You guess?”  He swung his leg over the top rung of the ladder and started down.

“It could be better.”

She noticed him limping as he walked toward her.  “Are you hurt?”

He rubbed his backside with a grin.  “Nah, just a little tender.  I locked horns with a mechanical bull last night and lost.  I’m not sure what hurts more, my head, my ass or my pride.”

“You landed on your head?  Did you go get checked?”  He could have a concussion or worse.

He chuckled.  “No, I landed on my backside after Katie challenged me to a ride off.”

So that was where they had gone.  “I take it you lost?”

He nodded.

That explained the hurt pride.  Though Burk might have been considered the all-out favorite with his rodeo past, it didn’t surprise her in the least that Katie O’Brien had outridden him.  First of all, his attraction to Katie put him at a disadvantage in the concentration department.  And then there was Katie.  She seemed like the kind of woman who didn’t back down from a challenge, one who put her heart and soul into everything she did.

Lacy looked up at him with a grin.  “Okay, Burk.  That covers your tender rear and your pride.  What’s wrong with your head?”

“Let’s just say I had one to many drinks last night to ease the pain.”

“And Cade?”

“No.  He had a couple, but that was it.  And it was a damn good thing.  He had to drive me home.”

At least she knew Cade had come home with Burk instead of going home with another woman.  Not that
she really cared what he did.  She
settled onto a crude wooden bench by the door with a sigh.

Burk sat next to her.  “What’s with the big sigh?”

“I was just wondering.  Has Cade always been so distant?  Or is it just me he acts that way around?”

He shook his head.  “No
t always.”  He offered an empathetic smile.  “I know
he
’s trying real hard to be nice to you, but I don’t guess that comes easy to man who’s shut himself off from feeling things.”

She
frowned.  “I suppose it doesn’t help matters that I’m a journalist.”

“Afraid not.”  Burk snatched a piece of straw up from the floor and stuck it between his teeth, muttering past it, “You know this whole thing is my fault.  The way he’s treating you.”

“Why do you think that?”

“Cade might have been nicer to you if I hadn’t of pretended to be him to get you here.  You know how he feels about reporters.”

She nodded.

“He’ll get over it,”
he
assured her.  “Especially when he sees how hard you
’
re
working
to
hold up
your end of the bargain.  You did a real good job with the horses yesterday.  By the time your stay here is over you’ll be a regular cowhand.”

“I won’t hold my breath
, b
ut thanks.”  She stood and crossed the straw littered barn floor to
Dakota
’s stall.  “Cade loved his wife a lot, didn’t he?”  It was more a statement than a question.

“That goes without saying. 
He
’s the kind of man who once he gives his heart away, it’s forever.  Unfortunately, forever was
too damn
short.”

She
nodded in understanding.

He
stood and joined her in front of
Dakota
’s stall.  “After Karen died,
Cade
let everything go
to the wayside
. 
He
didn’t care anymore. 
That’s why he was
forced to sell several of his best bulls
.  Had to
pay the bills and keep the remaining livestock fed.  Doc Andrews, Karen’s father and
the local vet
, offered his services back then at no charge until Cade got himself turned around.”

“That had to be hard for a man like Cade.”

“His pride took a real beating.”

“Doc Andrews sounds like a good man.”

“He is.  To this day he still cuts Cade a break on his fees.”

“I hope I have the chance to meet him before I go back to
Denver
.”

“We don’t see him around much unless one of the animals is sick.”

“I can’t imagine what Cade and Doc Andrews went through back then, losing someone they both loved so tragically.  And then for Cade to have to sell some of his bulls
...”  She shook her head sadly.

“You have no idea.”  He reached out to rub
Dakota
’s nose.  “All the hands quit because Cade got so temperamental, going off at every little thing.”  He shrugged.  “Guess it was just as well.  He couldn’t afford to pay them anyway.”

Her heart ached for Cade.  “Sounds like he had a lot of demons to fight back then.”

“Still does.  I have to admit I was pretty damn scared for him for a while.”

She
leaned back against the stall.  “Scared for
him
?  Why?”

“Because he always had this look in his eyes
.  L
ike he was wishing he’d been in that car
that day
, too.  But I put an end to that.”

“How?”

“He began picking fights where ever he went.  I think he just wanted someone to put an end to his pain.  Grief can do that to a person.”

“I know.” 
She was no stranger to g
rief.

“One day Cade came at me, temper flaring, so I gave him what he wanted.  When it was over, neither of us had any hard feelings, but Cade changed after that.  He lost the temper and became real quiet.  Sometimes, too quiet.”

“That had to be better than the way he had been acting.”

“You know,” he said chewing on the piece of straw in his mouth, “I think it actually scared me more after he stopped being
angry
.  It was like he went inside of himself where no one could get to him.  Sometimes in the middle of the night I’d wake up and see a light on out here in the barn.  I’d come out to find Cade standing here, staring at
Dakota.
”

Lacy was tryin
g very hard not to cry.  She ha
d covered a lot in her career, but nothing touched her soul with such intensity as an ex-rodeo rider, his best friend, and a mangy mutt, all trying to survive the pain of the past.

“Don’t go looking
all
sorrowful.  Cade eventually got past being sad all the time.  Now he’s the Cade you know.  A little rough around the edges and sometimes hard to read.”

Sometimes hard to read?  How about all the time?

“Believe me when I tell you it’s a hell of a lot better than the way he used to be.”

Lacy looked away, unshed tears filling
her eyes.  She was a journalist.  She knew better than to get involved personally in a story.  But it was too late.  She was already in deep and she knew it.  “Things
are getting
worse for him financially?”

“It’s not as bad as it was, but close.  The vandalism that’s been going on around here isn’t helping put any money in the bank.”

Her head snapped around.  “Vandalism?”

“Cut fences, slit tires, you name it.”

She had no idea those things had been going on. 
“Have you notified the sheriff?”

“Sure, but there’s not much we can do without witnesses.”  He looked at her.  “You didn’t by any chance make coffee this morning, did you?” 

“No,” she replied, her voice catching.  “But I could use some, too.  Why don’t I go make us a pot?”

“Thanks.  I’d surely appreciate it.”

“No, thank you.”

“Me?
” he replied, arching a questioning brow.  “
For what?”

“For explaining things to me.  I think I understand Cade a little better now.”

She
left the barn, her thoughts
all in a jumble. 
It was true what they said about there always being someone who was worse off than you. 

She had
n’t taken two steps into the
kitchen when she heard her cell phone ringing in the guestroom. 
How had she forgotten to take it with her out to the barn?  Frowning, she ran
to answer it.

“Hello?”
she said, slightly winded from her sprint to answer the call.

“
Lacy, Dr. M
ichaels
here
.”

Her heart dropped.  “
My grandmother
...”  She couldn’t even
bring herself to ask. 
She didn’t have to.

“
She
passed away a short while ago.”

“No,” she
said with a soft sob and she sank onto the bed. 

“She went
peacefully
in her sleep if that’s any comfort to you.”

Alone.  She was all alone now.  “It is, thank you,” she managed with
a muffled sob
.

“We’ve already placed a call in to the funeral home as per your grandmother’s arrangements.” 

“I appreciate your letting me know.  Thank you for all you’ve done for
her
.”  She flipped the phone shut and dropped it onto the bed beside her.  Then, the tears came. 

It was over.  No more sickness.  No more pain.  Her grandmother was finally at peace.  Lacy cried until she could cry no more. 
Until she
was numb. 

Finally, she stood and moved on trembling legs back
out
to the kitchen where she
made a pot of coffee, pouring three cups
to take out to the barn
with her when she went
. 

Looking around
the room
, she felt the welcome relief of being somewhere other than Denver.  There were too many memories there
for her
, both good and bad. 

Time to pull yourself together.
  Picking up the
tray of steaming coffee mugs
, she made her way back out to
the barn.  

“Lacy?” Burk said
worriedly the moment she
stepped into the barn.  He rushed over to take the tray from her, placing it on an upturned water barrel.  Then he put an arm around her
shoulders
and led her over to the bench she’d been sitting on earlier.  “What’s wrong?  You’re as white as a sheet?”

“I...it’s nothing.  I’m fine.”  But her hands were shaking.

“Here, sit down.  Tell me what’s wrong.  Did Cade say something
else
to upset you?”

She shook her head, fighting back a
fresh
surge of tears.  “No.”

“Damn it, Lacy, tell me what’s got you so upset.”  He sat down beside her.  “If
this
has anything to do with Cade, I
swear I
’ll beat the hell out of him...again! 

“No.  I already told you it doesn’t have anything to do with him.”  She sniffed softly.  “It’s my grandmother.”

He slipped a comforting arm about her shoulders.  “Is she sick?”

“Not anymore,” she replied shakily.  “I just got a call from her doctor.  She died this morning.”  Covering her face with her hands, she gave in to the tears.

“Ah, Lacy, I’m real sorry.”  Burk pulled her to him in a comforting gesture.  “You need to get home.  I’m sure your parents need you there.”

She shook her head.  “My father hasn’t needed me since the day my mother told him she was pregnant.  And my mother died when I was five.  My grandparents raised me.”