Careless Rapture (27 page)

When Jackie
arrived for Sunday dinner, she peeked in the playroom and saw Nina
and Marcus on the ground, while Ericka sat in Clay’s lap watching a
film. Tears streamed down the children’s faces.

She glanced at Clay, then asked them, “What’s
wrong?”

Nina wiped her eyes with the back of her
hand. “Charlotte died.”

“Who is Charlotte?”

Marcus sniffed. “The spider. She died.”

“Died,” Ericka said.

Clay kissed his niece on the forehead, then
set her on the conch. He stood and walked toward Jackie. “They have
seen
Charlotte’s Web
more than ten times and they cry every
time. I don’t understand it.”

“Are you still angry with me?”

“For what?” he asked sarcastically. “For
leaving me to spend time with my mother? Not at all I just want to
turn you over my knee.”

“Have you told anyone?”

Clay raised his brows. “That I want to spank
you?”

She hit him in the arm. “About us.”

“No, I’m hungry.”

She frowned. “What does that have to do with
anything?”

“I want to eat before I’m kicked out.”

“No one is going to kick you out.”

Drake announced dinner—a delicious meal of
deep fried fish with sun-dried-tomatoe vinaigrette. After a few
moments of idle chatter, Drake said, “Jackie, I know a guy I’d like
you to meet.”

She cut her fish. “Thank you, but I’m already
seeing somebody.”

“Who?”

She could feel Clay’s gaze. She hesitated.
“Just someone. It’s nothing serious.”

“I’d still like to know his name.”

Her voice firmed. “It’s not important.”

“Of course it’s important. We always know who
you’re going out with.”

“If it was serious, I’d let you know.”

Drake’s amber eyes became more intense. “If
he doesn’t want us to know who he is, then he’s hiding something. I
don’t think you should go out with someone like that.”

Eric spoke up. “Drake, leave it alone.”

He sent Eric a look. “Oh, yes,” he drawled.
“I forgot. You’re in favor of keeping secrets.”

“What does he mean by that?” Adriana
asked.

Eric pushed up his glasses and scowled. “It
means he thinks he knows what’s best for everyone else.”

“How’s that chest pain?” Drake asked.

Jackie saw the hint of red stain Eric’s face.
“It wasn’t his smoking that caused the chest pain,” she said.

Drake lowered his eyes.

Eric sent her a look of censure. “Don’t do
that.”

“Why not?” she said. “He doesn’t have the
right to tell us what to do anymore. Drake, we love you, but
sometimes we want you out of our lives so we don’t feel we have to
pay for the weight of your sacrifice.”

“My sacrifice was a gift,” Drake said
quietly. “You don’t owe me a thing.”

Jackie saw the look of hurt and regretted her
words. “Then why does it always feel that way? Like you’re our big
brother and our father, too. You have to let us make our own
mistakes.”

“It’s my duty to know---”

“No, it’s not.”

Clay sat forward. “There’s no need for this
discussion. Drake, she’s seeing—ow!” He rubbed his shin where
Jackie had kicked him

But he’d already caught Drake’s attention.
“You know who she’s seeing?” he asked.

“He’s just speculating,” Jackie said.
“Because he saw me with someone. He doesn’t know for sure.” Drake
ignored her. “What did he look like? Is he a decent guy?”

“Listen, mate, the truth is—ow!” He glared at
Jackie. “Don’t kick me again.”

“While you two play games,” Cassie said,
“Eric can answer a question.” She rested her elbow on the table and
cupped her chin. “What is this about chest pains?”

Adriana waved her fork. “Yes, I’d like to
hear about that, too.”

Eric glanced at Nina’s worried little face
and shrugged “It’s no big deal.”

“What is it?”

“I’ll tell you when we get home.”

“You’ll tell me now.”

His jaw twitched. “I have to get some tests
done. My doctor’s curious about some things.”

“What things?”

“My lungs.”

Cassie toyed with her earring. “And why
haven’t you had these tests done yet?”

“My schedule’s busy and I don’t have
time.”

“You can make time,” she said softly, her
words revealing an underlying command.

Cassie looked at Clay and Jackie. “Have you
two come to a decision?”

Clay nodded. “Drake—”

“I’m a grown woman.” Jackie glared at Clay.
“It’s none of his business.”

“You’re his business.”

“When I was a child, yes, but not
anymore.”

Eric took off his glasses and held them out
to Drake.

“Perhaps you need these to see.”

Drake frowned. “See what?”

He shoved his glasses back on and sent Jackie
and Clay a significant look. “What’s in front of you.”

Drake’s eyes darted between them. “No.”

Adriana’s mouth fell open. “I don’t believe
it.”

Cassie quickly interpreted the look on her
husband’s face. She said, “Nina, take Marcus and Ericka into the
playroom, please. Yes, you can take your dinner. Adriana, could you
help them?”

“But I want to hear--” Cassie sent her a look
that changed her mind.

Adriana stood. “Come on, children.”

Once the children were gone, Cassie said,
“Now, let’s be rational about this.”

“I’ll be rational,” Drake said, his voice
holding a cold edge that contrasted the fire of anger in his gaze.
“Have you been seeing my sister?”

“Yes,” Clay said.

No one spoke, waiting for the explosive
impact of his admission. But Drake didn’t explode. He kept his
voice level, his gaze steady. “Get out.”

Clay pushed back his chair and stood.

Eric, Jackie, and Cassie began to protest.
Drake sat back and waited.

Cassie said, “You’re both angry, but don’t be
hasty. Sit down, Clay.” She saw him look at Drake. “This is my
house, too. Please sit.”

He did.

Drake stood. “Then I’ll go.”

“No,” Cassie said.

“Honey, I think I prefer he left. And since I
respect you, I’ll give him five minutes to get out of my
house.”

Clay said, “Just let me explain.”

“You don’t need to explain anything.”

“Listen, mate—”

Drakes eyes flashed. “I’m not your mate. And
I know how you treat women.”

“Jackie’s different.”

“I know, she’s my sister.”

Clay picked up a fork and twirled it, his
tone ironic. “And I’m not good enough for her, am I? Because I was
once on the streets. Because I was once that drunk walking around
in a daze?” He pointed the fork at him. “You see in me what you
could have become, an ill-educated brute who lives on his wits
alone. I have no degrees, no schooling past part of the eleventh
grade. I get my grammar wrong and have trouble with numbers, but
unfortunately my disadvantages don’t stop me from feeling what I do
for you sister.”

Drake fell silent, the tension radiating
through the air. No one made a sound except when Adriana slipped
back in her chair. “You’re wrong,” Drake said in a soft tone. “I
never saw a brute. I never will. However, what I see is a man who
thought screwing my sister meant more to him than being my
friend.”

The words hit their mark, Clay pushed back
his chair, ready to leave.

“That’s not fair,” Jackie said. “I made a
choice, too.”

Drake turned to her. “Does he plan to marry
you?”

“It doesn’t matter. It’s not about what you
want for me, but what I want for myself.”

“I am—”

“I want you to stay out of my life.”

Drake cracked his knuckles, then said, “Sure,
but first you have to get out of mine.” He left the table.

The rest of them sat in silence. Finally,
Eric stood. “We’d better go.” Adriana followed him.

Jackie, Clay, and Cassie sat at the table
covered with a half-eaten meal.

“I should have gone,” Clay said.

Cassie stared at the table. “Be quiet.”

“We’re sorry,” Jackie said.

Cassie looked up, surprised. “Do you think
I’m upset about you two?” She shook her head, disappointed. “You
should know me better than that. Your relationship is your
business. And I’ll deal with Drake. No, that’s not it at all.” She
picked up a plate and stacked it on top of another. “What I found
interesting was that neither of you were surprised by Eric’s news.
You both knew and didn’t tell me.”

“Cassie—”

“I’m sick of excuses. I thought you trusted
me. Didn’t I keep the secret about the two of you? Didn’t I prove I
could keep others? I thought we had a real bond; you made me feel
stupid.” She stood.

Clay grabbed her hand, desperate not to lose
her trust as he’d lost Drake’s. “You’re the only reason I stayed,
please don’t—give me another chance.”

“I’m not kicking you out of my life, Clay, I
just realized you never came in.” She went into the kitchen.

Clay felt sick. The depths of his despair
carving out his insides leaving him empty. He couldn’t look at
Jackie as the anger of Drake’s words and Cassie’s hurt echoed in
his mind. He grabbed his jacket and left.

Jackie caught up to him as he walked along
the quiet street under the whistling trees and the scent of spring
wafted from daffodils and forsythias. The light of a lamp post
embraced the dark shadows along the sidewalk.

“I did consider him a friend,” he said.

“It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not. I hurt him.” After a moment he
said, “Laura flew away.”

Jackie touched his sleeve tenderly. “I’m
sorry”

“It was time for her to leave.”

“How did she escape?”

“She didn’t escape. I opened the window for
her.”

Jackie kicked a pebble into the grass. “So
you encouraged her to go?”

“Yes.”

“Do you plan to do the same with me?” she
asked in a low voice.

He stopped. “Will I have to?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

His voice became harsh. “Drake will
never—”

Jackie made an impatient gesture. “He’s not
my guardian. I don’t care what he thinks.”

He didn’t believe her, but just for tonight
he wanted to. He began walking again. “Is that woman still at your
house?”

“If you’re referring to your mother, yes, she
is.”

“I’ll meet with her.”

Jackie spun around and grabbed his arm. “Oh,
good. We can—”

He tucked her arm through his. “I’ll meet
with her alone.”

***

As Jackie and Clay walked in silence, Bertha
stood at the window smoking, regretting her life choices as she
waited for Jackie to return home. Bertha hated the silence that
allowed her thoughts to weigh on her and welcomed the loud ringing
of the phone. She stubbed out her cigarette and answered.
“Hello?”

There was a pause, then a persuasive male
voice came on the line.

***

Cassie woke to the sound of movement
downstairs. When she glanced at the empty space beside her, she
knew what it was. She found Drake in the kitchen. He stood at the
stove stirring something in a pot, its sweet aroma scenting the
air.

“It’s two in the morning,” she said, blinking
against the bright lights.

“You’re supposed to be a sleep.”

“So should you.”

“I’m not tired.” He turned to her. “You’ve
been crying.”

“I know.”

He drew her close and kissed her forehead.
“I’m sorry.”

“It’s only partially your fault.”

His voice cracked. “My fault? What’s my
fault?”

She bit her lip, then said, “About Clay—”

“He betrayed me.”

“How?”

“I invite a man into my home, my family, and
he sleeps with my sister.”

“I don’t see why you’re upset, you’re
sleeping with his.”

He sent her a cold glare. “Are you trying to
be funny?”

Cassie bit the inside of her cheek to keep
from grinning. “No. But if you really think about it, it’s no big
deal. They are both adults. What did you want him to do? Ask your
permission?”

“Yes.”

“Don’t be absurd.”

“My intentions for you were always
honorable.. From the first moment I saw you, I wanted to marry you,
to provide for you. He’s not offering her any of that.”

“Perhaps that’s not what she wants.”

He turned off the stove. “But that’s what she
deserves. He’s not . . . ” He trailed off.

“Good enough for her?”

Drake opened the cupboard and grabbed two
bowls. “Don’t put words in my mouth.”

“Then give me a few of your own.”

He set the bowls down, then rested his hands
on the counter. He hung his head with remembered pain. “I saw my
mother work herself to death because she had a husband who couldn’t
provide. Dad was a good man and he tried, but—”

“Your mother loved him and I don’t think she
regretted her choice. But the point is Jackie isn’t her. She’s
stronger than you think.”

He straightened and poured the green banana
porridge in the bowls. “How well do you really know him?”

“Why is this all of a sudden an analysis
about Clay? What if Jackie seduced him?”

Drake handed her a bowl. “She wouldn’t.”

Cassie grabbed a spoon, then sat at the
kitchen island. “How do you know?”

He sat beside her. “I know my sister.”

“You don’t know her as a woman and I can
assure you that’s a different thing.”

“I know her more than I know him.”

Cassie glanced at the ceiling, amazed. “I
can’t believe this.”

“What?”

“Are you trying to sound like a snob or is
this accidental? Drake, what is this really about?”

He scooped some pudding, then set it back
down. “He deceived me.”

“You deceived me,” she countered.

He had the grace to look embarrassed. “I had
a reason.”

“So that made it okay?”

“No. It was Eric’s secret and I didn’t feel
it was right for me to tell you I told him it was wrong, but he
didn’t listen.”