Cassidy (Big Sky Dreams 1) (34 page)

"Trace," Rylan welcomed him almost a week after the incident. "Come on in."

"Thank you. Do you have a minute?"

"Yes. Have a seat."

The men sat in Rylan's parlor, and Trace wrestled with how to ask his question.

"What's up?" Rylan asked, seeing the other man hesitate for the first time.

"A lot of images keep running through my mind from last Saturday, some more disturbing than others."

"I can imagine."

"Has Chandler ever talked to you about any feelings he might have for Cassie?"

"What did you see?" Rylan asked, buying a bit of time. This was the last thing he'd expected.

"I can't quite describe it, but I think he might love her. I'm not questioning anything he did that day. He took care of her when I couldn't, but something in his face lingers in my mind-a yearning or longing when he told me she'd gone to the sheriff's office."

Rylan nodded. "Chandler has talked to me. He does feel like he loves Cassidy, but he knows he can't love another man's wife. He's working hard to keep his feelings in check."

281"When did this all start?"

"He's cared for Cassidy in a special way for a long time, but for several reasons he's not acted on it. Then you made it clear how you felt, and he realized he waited too long. He's examined his heart, hoping it was more like competition than real feelings of love, but that's not what he's found."

Trace didn't know what to say. He was glad he knew but not sure what should happen next.

"How can he stay here?" Trace asked, thinking how hard it would be for him if the situation were reversed.

"I'm not sure he can. He's actually considered moving on."

Trace didn't want to lose his friendship with Chandler, but neither did he wish this on any man. He'd gone too many months loving Cassidy and not knowing where he stood. Chandler couldn't have Cassidy. At least Trace had been able to live with hope.

"Listen, Trace," the pastor said. "I can see you're bothered by this, but you shouldn't be. You didn't do anything wrong. If Cassidy had feelings for Chandler, she would not be marrying you. It's difficult for Chandler, but he's working hard in the midst of it."

"I don't want him to have to leave. He's a friend to both Cassidy and me, but if he's going to be miserable-" Trace cut off because Rylan was nodding in agreement.

The two talked for a bit longer, and Rylan was able to assure Trace that the situation was being handled. Then he asked his last question. "Will you tell Cassie?"

"No." Trace was sure about this. "She's too tenderhearted. It would bother her a great deal and make her uncomfortable around him. I don't think others know. I think for Chandler especially, that's best."

Rylan agreed. Trace thanked him and then made his way to Jeanette's. Once again, he told himself he was glad he knew, but it didn't make it a whole lot easier.

282

CASSIDY WOKE ON SATURDAY MORNING,glad that there was a sign

on the shop door stating it was closed until further notice. She didn't want the business to die-she had finished and delivered everything that had been previously ordered-but she didn't have the energy to keep things going on a daily basis right now.

Her visit to Edson had been such a horrible disappointment. He was still thinking of no one but himself. A man was dead, but all her brother would talk about was wanting her to find him a good lawyer.

And then the questions had set in. The plaguing doubts about how she'd handled everything last Saturday. Should she have fought Edson or Neal? Might Neal still be alive if she had begun to fight her brother, or would Jeanette be dead right now because of it?

And the wedding. Should it be postponed? Trace had not said anything about that, but then they'd seen very little of each other all week. And when they were together, they hadn't spent the time talking about their lives. The events from last Saturday were still too fresh. Jeanette was not quite out of the woods, and Trace still had a ranch to run.

Cassidy slowly climbed from bed, working not to worry but failing

283as more and more thoughts crowded into her mind. She heated water for a bath, just wanting to talk with Trace and wondering when that was going to happen.

"No sign of Cassidy?" Trace asked of Becky, whom he'd tracked down in the kitchen.

"Not yet. Shall I send her up when she arrives?"

"Actually, until my aunt and Heather are done, I'll be in the front parlor, but thank you, Becky," Trace said to the cook, wanting to talk with Cassidy while Jeanette was occupied.

Heather was helping Jeanette, who was moving very carefully, take a bath. Trace had not rushed into town, but he had hoped to talk to both Jeanette and Cassidy and felt let down when neither was available. He made himself comfortable in the front parlor, knowing he would hear the door.

He didn't have long to wait. Cassidy arrived about ten minutes later. Trace met her the moment she stepped inside, ready with a hug.

"Good morning." Cassidy greeted him warmly, returning the hug and sighing a little. "How are you?"

Trace stepped back without answering. "I'm fine," he said a bit slowly. "How are you?"

Cassidy noticed vaguely that his eyes searched her face, but she was more concerned with him than herself.

"Are you really fine?" Cassidy asked, not having registered Trace's question to her. "You must be getting worn out with this schedule."

"A little," Trace admitted, knowing that things were going to have to change. He sincerely hoped that Jeanette's bath meant she was well on her way to normal health because Cassidy Norton needed him. Meg Holden took care of him when she took care of her husband. No one looked after Cassidy but Cassidy. Jeanette and Meg certainly

284 tried, but both of them were unavailable right now, and so was he. There were dark smudges under Cassidy's eyes, and she was thin, the thinnest Trace had ever seen her. Trace, however, opted, at least for the moment, to keep these thoughts to himself.

"How is Jeanette?" Cassidy asked next.

"She's having a bath, so I hope that's a good sign."

"So you haven't talked to her yet?"

"No. Heather will come for me as soon as she's done. Come here," Trace commanded, taking her hand. "Sit down and tell me about you."

"I think you know everything," Cassidy said, smiling at him at little.

"We just haven't had much time to talk," Trace offered, "and I'm wondering how you are."

"I keep worrying," Cassidy admitted but didn't elaborate. "About what?"

"Everything." Cassidy said this and no more.

Trace worked to keep his own worry at bay. This answer concerned him. It wasn't like Cassidy. The woman who was usually so open with him was not talking.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" Trace tried.

"Oh, Trace," Cassidy began, her heart working to protect him. "It's just a lot of silly things. We don't have to get into anything right now."

"I'll tell you what," Trace decided quickly. "I'm going to run up and see how Jeanette and Heather are doing. I'll come back, and maybe then we'll have time to talk more."

Cassidy stayed where she was when he left, but not for long. A noise coming from the direction of the kitchen reminded her that Becky might be glad of some help.

"How are you?" Trace asked Jeanette. Heather had just tucked the

285covers back around her and gone to check on Theta. Jeanette's sister had done well during the ordeal, surprising everyone.

"Weary. Never has getting clean been such an effort." "You didn't start bleeding again, did you?"

"No. The wound is in good shape. Doctor Ertz was here last night and gave me a good report."

"That's good news."

"I have to sleep now, Trace."

"Okay, but I need to tell you something. I'm getting Cassidy out to the ranch today and keeping her there for a while. Brad or I will try to come in tomorrow, but I've got to see to Cassie right now, and Meg thinks Savanna has a cold."

"Oh, my," Jeanette said, wanting to help in the worst way. "We'll be all right. Will you be?"

"Yes, Trace," Jeanette murmured, her voice fading. "Go ahead. You know Rylan will come, and I've got Timothy and the girls."

Trace kissed her cheek before she completely drifted off, and then he slipped back out of the room. He didn't find Cassidy right away but eventually ran her to earth in the kitchen, her sleeves rolled up, working over some dough.

"How is she doing?" Cassidy asked, wiping her hands and getting ready to visit upstairs.

"She's doing well. The doctor was here last night and gave her a good report. The bath wore her out."

Cassidy headed out of the kitchen, but Trace caught her at the bottom of the stairs.

"You can certainly go and see her, Cass, but she's not going to wake up. She could barely stay awake to speak to me."

"Okay. I'll just run up and take a peek at her."

Trace trailed along, not impatient but ready to talk to Cassidy as soon as she had seen Jeanette. It didn't take long, but Cassidy was still full of surprises.

"Maybe I should sit with her today," Cassidy suggested once she and Trace were back in the hall.

286 "She's just going to sleep," Trace said. He had Cassidy's arm and was taking her toward the stairs. "And besides, we're running away to the ranch."

"We are?"

"Yes. I talked with Jeanette, and she knows that Brad or I will be back tomorrow."

"Where will I be?"

"At the ranch."

"What about Meg?"

"Savanna is sick. They'll be at the ranch too."

He had actually gotten her to the front door, her coat on, before she dug her heels in.

"What's going on?"

Trace put his hands on the sides of her face, framing it, his thumbs stroking softly across her cheek bones.

"You're tired and thin and taking care of everyone but yourself. I didn't see it until today. I can't do anything about the past, but today I can start to fix this. You're worried, and I suspect working too hard, and something is very wrong. I'm taking you away to the ranch so you can rest and we can talk. That's what's going on."

"Oh," Cassidy said, her voice so surprised and adorable that Trace had to chuckle. He also had to kiss her. It took a little longer than he planned to leave for the ranch.

Trace had said when the wagon was in motion.

He had gotten an earful. Cassidy had cried and said things almost before he could take them in. It had been painful to write to her mother. Did he want to postpone the wedding? All the customers' clothes were sewn and delivered, but that had meant seeing Hiram Brickel again when she delivered Halston's shirts, and she could tell that he wanted to ask her yet again to marry him. She was low on food but didn't have time to shop. She didn't know if she should

287visit Edson again. What if the shop didn't make it with this time of being closed? She couldn't possibly keep Jeanette's money, and that meant they could not build in the spring.

"Well, now," Trace said, almost wanting to laugh-not at Cassidy but at the amazing number of things she could keep going in her head. He knew that Meg was like that as well, and sometimes Brad got into trouble for not keeping things straight.

"What did that mean?" Cassidy asked, her voice telling Trace she was not ready to be laughed at and that he'd best do some backtracking.

"Okay, Cass, we're going to take today to cover the whole list. We'll talk about all of it. Not all at one time-that would be too much-but we're getting everything sorted out today."

Cassidy still wasn't sure she wasn't being laughed at. She looked over at Trace, who looked back.

"Will that work?" he asked in complete sincerity.

"Yes," Cassidy said, relieved to see the caring in his eyes. "That will work."

It was quiet for a moment, and Cassidy wanted to let it go but didn't. She asked, "Did you want to laugh?"

"Not at you," Trace replied honestly. "Just at the size of the list. Meg thinks like that too, and it always astounds me."

Cassidy had to smile at his tone. She was feeling too tender right now for her own good, and maybe a little laughter at her myriad thoughts was just what she needed.

Savanna's breathing rattled as she lay on her father's chest. She slept easier upright than in the cradle. Brad was going to ride out on the range today, but even this hour spent holding Savanna would give Meg a chance to catch up.

Brad was content to sit with her, thinking about things and praying, but heard the wagon out front and went to the window. He

288wasn't expecting Trace back so soon, but took it as a good sign. And Cassidy was with him. Brad smiled. He was ready to have Cassidy with them on a permanent basis. The next two weeks could not come fast enough for him.

"Why were you thinking we should postpone the wedding?" Trace covered that question first. Meg was working in the kitchen, and Brad had headed out. Trace had taken his niece onto his chest, his deep voice as familiar and comforting to her as her father's.