Catherine's Cross (37 page)

“The first was ‘Emily,' followed by ‘I Loves You Porgy.'”

“George Gershwin from
Porgy and Bess
?”

“Yes, that's correct. Both of those songs were recorded magnificently by Bill Evans.”

“I had never heard of him until I listened to a CD that Seth played for me one night,” Jenks added.

“You're too young to be acquainted with his work unless you're a jazz fan. He passed away over twenty years ago, a victim of his own excesses. I suppose he committed slow suicide due to his addictions.”

Jenks thought back to the day that Crawford Forrest described her brother as brilliant, but ruined by his excesses. “That's terrible,” she said slowly.

“Yes, I agree. Sadly, artistic genius is often accompanied by weakness for unhealthy indulgences.” He sat down in a chair opposite her and added, “Jenkins, I want you to know that you are welcome here for as long as you'd like to stay. Seth is like a son to me, and I want only the best for him. What he's going through is very difficult, but with all our help he'll succeed. While he was one of my brightest students at the university, he singularly stood out due to his work ethic. I know he'll overcome this.”

“Thank you, Dr. Walker,” Jenks said as she rose from the couch. She felt tired, and she said good night, checking on Seth before going to her bedroom.

Dr. Walker upheld his commitment and for the next few weeks traveled to Charleston, taking notes and making recordings of the law school lectures. Jenks studied with Seth each day. When they weren't working on his assignments, she took long walks around the Walker property. Jenks often ended up at the Rabbit Hash Hunt Club where she studied grave markers from the nineteenth century. Summer was fading into fall, but the days were still warm and the leaves were yet to change color.

On the last Saturday of September, Dr. Walker received a phone call during breakfast. The tone of his voice was oddly morose, and when he hung up the receiver, he looked at his wife. “Sophia, that was Herbert Bradley over on Bray's Island. He said that his granddaughter, Elizabeth, took an overdose of sleeping pills and has passed away.”

“Oh, my goodness,” she exclaimed. “We must go to them.”

“Yes, I agree. My Lord, we attended her high school graduation just a little over a year ago. ”

Mrs. Walker rose from the kitchen table and washed her coffee cup out in the sink.

“I'll clean up the breakfast dishes,” Jenks volunteered.

“Thank you, my dear,” Mrs. Walker said as she left the kitchen.

When the Walkers departed for Bray's Island, Jenks got out Seth's school notes. “Would you like to go over contract law first?”

“Yes, that will be fine,” Seth replied. Jenks could see worry lines on his face. For the next two hours they reviewed his notes, but Seth was missing questions.

“Are you all right?” she asked.

“I'm sorry, but I can't concentrate.”

“Let's take a break for lunch.”

“Okay.”

Jenks made sandwiches and as they sat down to eat, thunder sounded in the west. The sky became dark and the winds began to pick up. “Looks like we're in for some bad weather,” she said.

Lightning flashed, followed by a large thunderclap, and the electricity went off in the house. Jenks went to the pantry and got several candles out, lit them, and placed them on the kitchen island. Walking to the window, she looked out. “My goodness, it's pouring rain outside. I can hardly see to the edge of the woods.” She turned and glanced at Seth—he did not respond to her comment. In the half light of the candlelit room, she saw that he was staring into space.

When the severe weather passed, Seth asked Jenks to help him onto the screened porch. There was a daybed against the outside wall of the house, and she helped him maneuver with his crutches to the settee. He wearily sat down, and then Jenks helped him get comfortable. She put a light blanket over him, and then joined him on the bed.

He looked up into her eyes. “I'm very disturbed by Elizabeth Bradley's death.”

“Did you know her?”

“Yes, I met her family on several occasions. Her grandparents are good friends with the Walkers.”

“Perhaps her death was an accident.”

“Unless she left a note, no one can be certain.”

Jenks looked out into the Walker's rear yard. Large puddles of water were accumulating on the grounds, and she noticed a huge turtle making its way across the property. She turned back to Seth and said, “Prior to Rory's suicide, I only knew one person who died that way.”

“A friend of yours?”

“I think I mentioned her to you. She had terrible trouble with her weight. This was in high school and teenagers ridiculed her because of her obesity. She took some kind of drug and killed herself one afternoon after class.”

“Terrible thing,” Seth said as he shook his head.

“I'll never forget her wake. I'm not sure why her parents didn't choose a properly sized casket for her, but she was severely cramped inside her coffin. I felt terrible sadness for her.”

“There are many reasons that people are driven to take their own lives. Sometimes, they don't have a choice.”

“What do you mean?”

“Sometimes, circumstances are so severe that a person chooses death over other alternatives.”

She noticed that he was beginning to have tears well in his eyes.

“What's wrong?”

A painful expression was on his countenance, and he slowly replied, “My brother, Steel, took his own life in Afghanistan.”

“Oh, my God. Do you know what happened?”

“Yes, to some degree. Allied forces composed of British troops and US Marines were waging an offensive against the Taliban in the Helmand Province. The area is known as a major producer of opium and was heavily controlled by the Taliban. Steel's unit was in an outpost that came under enemy fire, and the Marines were severally outnumbered. Those bastards . . .” He choked, and taking a deep breath, he said in a sob, “The last communication with his unit confirmed that Steel had been shot twice by enemy fire.”

“Please go on,” she whispered.

He wiped tears from his eyes and strained to speak. “I was told that his fatal wound was self-inflicted—I believe that he knew that he would be taken prisoner and tortured by the Taliban. They do horrible things to their prisoners, especially the wounded. Everyone in his unit died.”

“I'm so sorry.”

Tears streamed down his cheeks. “I believe he chose to take his own life rather than have death chosen for him and under tortuous circumstances.”

“Oh, baby.” Jenks lay down beside him on the daybed and took him in her arms. “This is what Dr. Walker said you needed to get off your chest the night you had the terrible nightmare about Steel.”

Seth nodded.

“Why didn't you tell me this earlier?”

“I can barely deal with it myself. Forgive me.”

“Shh . . . shh, it's all right.”

He gazed into her eyes. “I knew that there was something seriously wrong with Steel on the day he died. I felt an indescribable pain.”

Cold chills descended upon her. “The same thing happened to me on the day Gigi was murdered.”

“I know,” he whispered.

They wrapped their arms around each other and held each other tightly. Jenks could feel Seth's tears against her cheeks, and she leaned back to wipe them from his face.

“After he died, I drank myself into a stupor for several days. But I realized that Steel would not want to see me destroying myself with alcohol. I gained my self-control back by thinking about him. He was a man of courage and will always be my hero. For certain, I lost a part of me when Steel passed away.” He wiped tears away with the back of his hand. “I know that you felt the same sensations when Gigi was drowning in the river. God help us,” Seth said softly.

“Oh, Seth,” she said as she pulled him tightly against her and stroked his face. As they lay together, an occasional rumble of thunder sounded in the distance while the rain continued to fall.

After his cast was removed, Seth wore a soft cast and walked with a cane. He was having pain in his leg and could only walk short distances before having to rest. Since Jenks had met Seth, she had seen him only with a military-style haircut. He had not been to the barber in weeks and his dark hair had grown out to form wavy curls. Jenks loved to run her fingers through it, and she found him sexier with his thick tresses.

Jenks thought back to the first time they had been intimate. She had mentally compared his physique to the statue of a Roman youth whose steely facial determination and physical perfection had reminded her of her lover. Now Seth's hair matched the wavy tresses of the Roman youth. She recalled wondering at that time what Seth's hair would look like if he grew it out. His hair now covered his scar.
Be careful what you wish for.

On class days, Seth was now traveling with Dr. Walker to Charleston. He was introduced to performing research in the law library, and Dr. Walker continued to help him in the evenings with his studies. Jenks noticed that Seth still tired easily and was continuing to have some memory problems. While Seth was away at school, she often volunteered at the Beaufort County Library. The children's reading sessions were over from the summer, but there was usually someone who could use help with reading or finding a book.

One evening, when Seth lay down on his bed after dinner, Jenks came in to join him. “I'm so tired. Perhaps I should have postponed law school until the spring,” Seth said wearily.

“You're going to be fine. Everyone wants to see you succeed. Just don't put unnecessary pressure on yourself.”

He took her hand in his and squeezed it. “I don't want you to lose your job in Raleigh because you're here helping take care of me.”

“I've already made a decision about returning home. I want to stay with you. I'm not going back.”

Tears filled his eyes, and he pulled her into his arms. “I'm glad you're staying,” he whispered.

“I'm going by the Beaufort County School District office to inquire about substitute teaching and to see if there are any openings in the spring.”

The next day, Jenks met with Dr. Anderson at the District office, and she was given the contact information for the principals at several local schools. She phoned each administrator and explained her situation and that she was available for substitute teaching. The principal at St. Helena Elementary asked if she could come to work on Friday. One of their third-grade teachers was taking a personal day for business. Jenks agreed to be at the school early so she could meet the staff and go over the teacher's lesson planner.