Cat's Lair (18 page)

He flashed her a small smile, still wondering who the hell she wanted to call and considering handcuffing her to his bed just to make certain it wasn’t Cordeau. “I like your coffee too.”

“I’ll make that first,” she said. “And then I’ll look through your fridge and the cupboards to see what you’ve got in the way of food.”

“Emma is pretty thorough,” Eli said, still distracted. He caught the back of a chair, spun it around and straddled it, leaning a little forward to look her in the eye. “You going to tell me why you were looking for a phone? You still think you’re going to make Cordeau your choice of mate and not me?”

There was no keeping the snarl from his voice. He had gone from mellow to angry – it was there in his tone – and quite frankly, he didn’t give a damn if it scared her or not. She had to see the rage in his eyes. It roiled in his gut. “You want to tell me that shit, Cat? Because I can tell you, no fucking way is Cordeau ever going to put his dirty hands on you.”

8

C
ATARINA
turned back around to face Eli. He’d been right about the leopard and his temper. The lines in his face were cut deep. There was a hard set to his jaw. His eyes were cat yellow and fixed on her intently. She shook her head and turned back to the espresso machine, concentrating on making that first cup. She needed it if she was going to face him after ripping her own clothes off and jumping him. He obviously needed it just to mellow him out.

“And you call me grumpy in the morning,” she muttered.

“What the hell did you just say?” he demanded.

She rolled her eyes at the coffee machine. “Clearly you’re the grumpy one in the morning, not me. I’m being all sweet making you a cup of coffee and you’re snarling like some raging wild beast.”

“Newsflash, Kitten. I
am
a snarling, raging beast. You want to answer the damn question?”

“Not particularly. At least not until I have two or three sips of coffee under my belt and you have a full cup. What a grouch.”

“Don’t give me attitude, baby, not when I’m feeling like this¸” he warned, a low growl rumbling in his throat.

“Don’t
you
give
me
attitude when I’m making a masterpiece,” she countered. She glanced at him over her shoulder.

His hair was all over the place, and she liked it that way. She didn’t know exactly what to think anymore so she didn’t want to think too much about anything. He’d broken her heart, devastated her, basically kidnapped her and then opened his heart to her – if she could believe him.

There was the problem as she saw it. Could she actually believe anything he said? He was a good actor. She’d fallen for him hook, line and sinker, and he’d betrayed her. She tried hard to keep an open mind. At first she hadn’t wanted to hear anything he said. Then she wanted him to be Ridley again. Eli wasn’t Ridley, but there seemed to be a part of him that was.

“Woman, you keep it up and you’re going to find yourself in trouble.”

“Maybe.” She turned around again, and this time had a cup of perfection in her hands. “But this just may buy my way out of it.” She took him the coffee. “Drink that, Mr. Grumpy Pants, and see if it doesn’t improve your disposition.”

His gaze moved over her face with a brooding look she tried not to think was hot and sexy, but of course she really did. She began making her own cup of coffee, needing to do something besides look at him. Looking at him didn’t help her confusion.

“All right. I’ve got some coffee in me. Now are you going to tell me why you were looking for a phone?”

She burst out laughing. She couldn’t help herself. He was like a dog with a bone. He wasn’t going to drop it, but then she was beginning to realize he didn’t drop anything important to him.

“You like your way, don’t you?” she asked.

“In all things, Kitten. You’d better get used to it,” he cautioned. “Now answer the fucking question before I throw you over my shoulder and haul your ass back to my bed to show you who you’re supposed to be with – let me give you a clue – his name is Eli Perez.”

Catarina heaved an exaggerated sigh. “Seriously, Eli? Are you going to threaten me with sex every time you don’t get your way?”

She heard him put the coffee cup down, and the chair scraped. Her heart jumped and she spun around to face him. He was on his feet, stalking her purposefully. She held up one hand to ward him off, laughing in spite of the sudden fear coursing through her body. Fear and excitement.

“Who the hell said anything about sex? I’m considering something entirely different.”

She didn’t want to test him and she backed up until she collided with the counter. “You do know that your behavior is causing serious disappointment, Eli. I held out hope for my Zen fantasy, and you’ve buried that deep.”

“Catarina.” He bit out her name between clenched teeth.

“I noticed you didn’t have a phone. It was an observation, that’s all. Rafe would be the last man on earth I would call in this situation.”

He stopped, towering over her, in her space. She could feel the heat from his body and she remembered how it felt to melt against him. She didn’t close her eyes and hold that memory to her, but she wanted to and that confused her even more.

“A situation like this?” he echoed.

“He’d kill you, Eli. He might even kill me, leopard or no leopard. At the very least, he’d make me pay with the blood of the people I care about.”

His golden gaze searched her blue one. One hand cupped the side of her face, his thumb sliding over her skin. “That’s it. You observed I had no phone and you just confirmed it out loud?”

She nodded. “And don’t forget the part where you totally shot down my Zen fantasy.”

His smile was slow in coming but it was genuine and it warmed his eyes. “I’ll have to see what I can do about replacing that one with something else.”

She felt a shiver go right through her. She had wanted to see if she could make him smile like that. He might be the worst grump in the world in the morning with no coffee and he had definitely shattered every dream she had of a Zen master, but he was gorgeous and all man standing in her space, smelling like a rain forest and sex. He looked darkly sensual, and intensely masculine.

“One more thing, Kitten,” Eli added, his fingers skimming her chin with the same gentle caress, robbing her of breath. “I wouldn’t bet the bank on Cordeau being able to kill me so easily.”

She shivered again, this time because he sounded like he meant it. She even took a step back but bumped against the counter. There was no way to look away from his focused stare. She was caught there, her mouth dry, her heart pounding. His dangerous quality was back, clinging to him like a second skin. He wasn’t the same kind of dangerous as Rafe, but she could see the predator in him now. She saw the leopard, and there was no doubt in her mind that he could kill if he needed to. That he would kill if he needed to.

“Don’t.” He said the word softly.

She couldn’t breathe. She stared up at him, shaking her head, having no idea what he meant.

“Don’t look at me like that. Don’t ever be afraid of me. You took a step back and you look as if you think I might hit you. That could never happen, baby.”

Clutching the coffee cup, she lifted her hand to her scalp, the memory of his behavior in the warehouse and the truck washing over her. What had she been thinking? That he really was Ridley Cromer just because they’d had sex? Her body ached all over. She had marks on her skin. That hadn’t been making love. They’d had sex. Rough sex. She’d suddenly felt all sweet and melty inside. That didn’t change who or what he was.

“Kitten.” He groaned softly, and his fingers went to her scalp, massaging gently. “I didn’t hit you. Remember that when you’re condemning me. You attacked me more than once and I restrained you, but I didn’t hit you. In the truck, I had to stop you. A leopard can track through scent. Your scent could not be on that ground. You knew he was leopard and you knew you were risking him finding you.”

“I wanted to get away from you,” she admitted in a low voice.

She hated the way her body went into meltdown at his touch. That confused her more than anything else. She should have been screaming at him not to touch her, but instead, when he did, even in such a simple way, she wanted to get closer to him. Maybe she wasn’t slutty, but certainly the leopard inside of her had to be.

“I’m well aware you wanted to get away from me, Cat,” Eli said, in a voice totally devoid of feeling.

Her gaze jumped to his. His hooded, sensual eyes were back to moving over her face broodingly. She pressed her lips together and then lifted her chin, forcing herself to look him straight in the eyes.

“Eli, what if I don’t want all this? What if my leopard chooses your leopard, but I don’t choose you? What happens then?”

His face softened. “Your leopard has already chosen, Kitten. So has mine. I’m the only man who has ever been inside of you and I’m the only man who ever will. If your choice isn’t me right now, I’ll have to work a hell of a lot harder to make certain it is.” His thumb was back to moving gently over her skin. “Too much has happened too fast for you to be able to even have a chance at knowing what or who you want. That’s why we’re here. Cordeau won’t find you here and neither will the DEA. You have time to figure it out.”

She didn’t take her gaze from his. “Eli, you
are
the DEA.”

“Not here, I’m not.”

“How do I know what’s real and what isn’t with you?” Her heart pounded when she asked, but she watched his face, hoping for a clue.

“You don’t at first,” he said. “That’s something I have to prove to you. But I’m asking for you to give me a chance to prove it to you.”

She kept her eyes on his. “You didn’t answer my question, Eli. What if my leopard chooses you and I don’t? What happens?”

He was silent for a long time. She didn’t think he’d answer her. His thumb slid over her lips and then down to her chin. Featherlight. She felt his touch all the way to her most feminine core. Her body trembled, but more to the point, she felt the sudden damp heat between her legs. She bit at her lower lip and then sharply inhaled when his gaze settled there. Just the small act of breathing lifted her breasts beneath his flannel shirt and she became acutely aware she wore nothing beneath it. What had possessed her to be so stupid?

He was close. So close she felt heat radiating off of him. She felt every breath he took. She felt his hunger. It was so close to the surface, and it was there in the glittering gold of his eyes. Intense. Powerful. Very focused on her. She had only to take one small step and she’d be in his arms. She wanted to be in his arms and that was just humiliating.

He had all the experience and she had none. Sex could be another way to control her. What if he interrogated her while they were having sex? She’d probably tell him everything. She’d never be any kind of a spy, that was for certain.

Abruptly Eli stepped back away from her, raking his fingers through his hair. “Woman, you have to stop thinking so much. Your face is an open book. I get that I fucked up and I’m doing my best to make up for that, but it hurts like hell when you look at me that way. I’m going to take my shower and you put together breakfast. That will give us both a little time away from each other.”

She nodded. Grateful and disappointed at the same time. Which again, was crazy and totally humiliating. She didn’t seem to have any self-control around him.

“As for your question, I don’t honestly have an answer to that. I don’t, Cat. I hadn’t even considered that a woman might not want the same man her leopard wants because as a rule, they’re mates. The humans are and so are the leopards.”

“So it’s possible I could still leave if my leopard accepted yours,” she persisted. She needed to know. She
had
to know she had a choice.

“I think it would be improbable that would happen, but I think any of us can walk away if we decide we don’t want what we have.” He stepped into her space again, his fingers on her chin, tilting her head so she could look into his eyes, eyes that were pure cat. “As to whether or not I would turn into Cordeau without you, I can’t honestly say.” He dropped his hand abruptly and turned and walked out of the room.

Catarina found herself shaking. She walked to the kitchen chair with her coffee, sat down and drew up her legs. What had he meant by that strange statement? He couldn’t possibly turn into Rafe. Eli might be leopard, but he wouldn’t be a part of the DEA if he wanted to commit the kinds of crimes Rafe did. Rafe’s organization spanned three states. He had a large network, and it was growing every day. She just couldn’t see Eli running guns or keeping prostitutes in line or creating a drug empire. Killing maybe, the rest of it no way.

How could she want a man so much when she didn’t trust him? She was very honest with herself. Eli wasn’t Ridley but she was still very attracted to him. Their chemistry was off the charts. Still, sex wasn’t making love. People hooked up all the time for great sex, didn’t they? Couldn’t she just view it like that? He knew about the little hussy inside of her. She could bide her time until her leopard made her appearance, use Eli for great sex and then if things went bad, just walk away.