Cavanaugh on Duty (19 page)

She’d heard stories to that effect time and again and knew it was true.

Knew too that right now she just didn’t care. Because what was going on inside her had taken center stage and would continue to build steam until she experienced some form of release—and soon. And since she wasn’t planning on bungee jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge anytime within the next couple of days, that really left her only one viable way out.

She wanted to be with him.

Wanted to be with this man who pretended not to know her, pretended not to remember her for whatever reason that suited him.

But denying the past didn’t change it, didn’t mean it had never happened, no matter how much he wished it to the contrary.

But if it helped him get through his day and go on with his life, who was she to upset the balance he’d struck?

If he wanted her to know that he’d lied about who he was...that he
was
in fact the wildly popular high school jock who had inhabited the dreams of half the girls attending Aurora High all those years ago, then he would tell her in his own time. And she could wait, at least for that.

But as for waiting for him to make that first move, to lead her where she found herself so desperately wanting to go, well, that was another story. One that she might have to take upon herself to orchestrate if she wanted it to happen.

Even now she could feel every bone in her body growing tense and impatient.

She was going to have to do something about that, Kari thought—and taking an extralong, extracold shower tonight really didn’t seem as though it would be the answer to her problem.

But for now she did her best to put a lid on it. After all, she reasoned, she couldn’t very well jump him here, right in the middle of her father’s wedding reception.

At the very least, she was going to have to wait until they were alone, and that wasn’t going to happen until they left the party.

Laying her head against Esteban’s shoulder, she went on dancing and just enjoyed his company as well as his close proximity.

For now that had to be enough.

As she was reining herself in, Esteban went on telling himself that his incredibly sexy partner wasn’t distracting him, and that he
wasn’t
experiencing any sort of longings, beyond wishing that the band would take a long break right about now so that he could cool off.

He was getting rather good at lying.

* * *

“Are they all like that?” Esteban asked her.

They had said their goodbyes and were almost at his apartment complex when he finally broached the question. It was several hours later, and even though the whole event had lasted more than twelve hours, he and Kari were hardly the last ones to leave when they’d finally decided it was time to go.

He’d been so quiet, she’d become convinced that Esteban wasn’t going to talk at all. That maybe this was his way of handling the potent attraction that she’d felt growing between them. Because there was definitely something going on, and she was convinced that she wasn’t the only one who felt it.

But she had also begun to think that Esteban’s way of dealing with it was to slip into denial, and for him that seemed to mean silence.

It took her a second to run his question through her head, and even then she couldn’t make much sense of it.

“Huh? What are you talking about?” she asked him, confused.

“The Cavanaugh weddings.” He reasoned that this couldn’t have been the first one she’d attended, which meant that she had something to go by to make a judgment. “Are they all these marathon affairs?”

Now she understood his question. Looking at the situation from his point of view, she could see why he’d ask. He’d been a loner for too long and had no family to relate to anymore.

“Andrew Cavanaugh’s shindigs, be they wedding ceremonies, birthday parties, Christmas celebrations or just spur-of-the-moment things he throws together, go on for at least half a day, if not more.” Her mouth curved as she recalled one particular example. “When my branch of the family came to light, the party he threw began on a Friday afternoon and lasted until Sunday night. That’s a family that likes each other’s company,” she told him with fondness in her voice. “The food, fabulous though it is, is secondary to the company—just don’t tell Uncle Andrew I said so. He takes a great deal of pride in his cooking.”

He lifted a brow. “And when would I get a chance to tell him that?”

She didn’t even have to pause to think before she answered. “At the next party.”

They were already planning another one? So soon? “I wasn’t invited,” he pointed out.

She realized that she needed to explain the rules to him. “Once you attend one party, the invitation is a standing one and understood. The only way to get out of the perpetual invitations is to die,” she deadpanned. She saw his expression grow somber. “I’m sorry, did I say something wrong?”

Her question surprised him, catching him off guard. “What makes you say that?”

“Well, for one thing, you look like you’re a million miles away.”
For another,
she added silently,
you look sad.

“No, I’m just remembering something.” They had reached their destination and she parked in the last spot in guest parking. He blew out a breath as he got out of her vehicle. “I’m remembering a better time—in my life,” he clarified, “not in comparison to tonight. I had a good time,” he admitted as they came to his door.

She pretended to be impressed. “Wow, and I didn’t even have to pull any teeth to get that out of you this time.”

He shook his head. The woman never stopped, he thought. “You’re relentless, aren’t you?”

She took no offense at his assessment. Actually, she took it as a compliment, though she had a feeling he hadn’t intended it that way. “I’m one of seven and the runt of the litter. I have to be.”

Runt.
Now there was a term he would have never applied to her. “You’re not like any runt I’ve ever seen.”

“Thank you—I think,” Kari added with a soft laugh.

He didn’t even crack a smile. It was far too hard to smile when his gut felt as if it was twisted into a knot.
Breathing
was a challenge. And all because she was standing so close to him, the moonlight in her hair and the scent of her perfume encircling him like a golden lasso.

“Don’t thank me for the truth.”

He’d lived the past three years in the shadows, doing his best not to be noticed, remaining off the grid and unappreciated. He needed to know that what he thought mattered, she realized. That his whole life didn’t just amount to footprints in the sand.

“Someone has to,” she told him softly.

Drawing a breath was no longer important to him. But, as he stood there before his door, he knew that kissing her
was
important to him at this very moment in time, even if it wound up being his last, dying act.

So, the next moment, he went with his instincts and did what he’d been longing to do for
hours
now.

He kissed her.

Chapter 14

H
allelujah!

The singular declaration of thanksgiving and joy echoed in Kari’s head as she rose up on her toes and wove her arms around Esteban’s neck, eagerly surrendering to the sinfully delicious sensations that were shooting throughout her
body.

It brought with it a wave of incredible relief.

She’d become convinced that if anything was going to happen between them,
she
would have to be the one who made the first move. Since they’d gotten into her car, Esteban had been so stoically quiet she’d assumed he was silently counting the minutes until she would drop him off at his apartment and leave him be.

But if that had happened, it would have left her grappling with unresolved feelings and an itch that desperately wanted to be scratched.

However, neither choice open to her would have been satisfactory. To make the first move would have been awkward for her. To go home a seething cauldron of unaddressed desires would have been even worse.

Now, mercifully, she didn’t have to force herself to pick either.

Because Esteban had just ended her dilemma and sent her hurtling through space, all aglow like a comet.

And then, just as abruptly as Esteban had begun kissing her, he stopped.

All the oxygen had been drained out of her lungs—possibly out of the area surrounding her, as well. Kari stared at the man responsible for her condition, dazed and temporarily unable to string together two words to create even half of a coherent thought.

Blinking, Kari ran the tip of her tongue along incredibly parched lips in an effort to separate them so she
could
say something—once a thought actually came together in her head.

“Well...okay...good...night,” she said, stumbling through the simple words.

Esteban had somehow managed to open his apartment door while she was trying to remember if English was indeed her first language. Rather than take the opportunity to just disappear into his apartment or mumble an inaudible response, Esteban took hold of her hand and tugged on it just enough to get her to follow him inside.

Pushing the door closed behind her, the man who had unknowingly made her tingle all day backed her up against that same door. Then, his hands braced against it on either side of her, he completely filled up all the available space around her just before he brought his mouth down on hers again.

Her heart had already started pounding hard again a microsecond before their lips met.

But that didn’t hold a candle to the rhythm it hit once Esteban kissed her again. It began beating so hard that, in comparison, a rocket would have seemed to be going in slow motion.

Esteban stopped for a second time, even as all systems were gleefully proclaiming to be a “go” inside her.

“At this rate—” she struggled hard to catch her breath and not gasp out her words “—my accelerator is going to stall out or break altogether.”

“I just want to be sure it’s not the alcohol,” Esteban told her, his eyes holding her in place.

She wasn’t sure what he was asking her. Did he think his judgment had gotten clouded because he’d had a few drinks? “For me or for you?” she asked.

“You.” Had he been the one to imbibe too much, he had enough control over himself to stop what he was doing and insist she go home. But he was worried that
her
resistance had been compromised.

Kari’s eyes held his as she struggled with the very real desire to just rip off all his clothes and end any need for further discussion.

Her voice was low and husky with raw desire as she said, “I stopped drinking four hours ago.”

His eyes scrutinized her. “Then you’re sure?” he pressed, giving her every chance to shut him down.

“Let me think.” Kari pretended to give his question serious consideration. That lasted exactly one second. “Yeah, I’m sure,” she told him with feeling.

“Good,” he pronounced.

That was all he wanted to hear—to be sure that he wasn’t just taking advantage of her or the moment, that he wasn’t pressuring her into something she wasn’t fully prepared for. Had she opted to walk away, he wasn’t certain what he would have done to cope with her rejection. He knew only that he would have had to deal with it somehow.

But he was very grateful he wasn’t going to have to find out how.

Even so, Kari had managed to awaken a hunger in him that hadn’t reared its head in so long that he couldn’t remember it—the last time he’d actually been with a woman. But Esteban forced himself to rein in his eagerness. He made himself go slowly so that they could both savor the moment, rather than making love as if they were swirling about on the outer funnel of a twister, forced to blast through it before they were both unceremoniously thrown to the ground. That way wouldn’t have been memorable, only fast.

He wanted it to be memorable.

And perforce Esteban had no intentions of taking her right here, by the front door, even though his body was more than ready to do just that.

Instead, his mouth still sealed to hers, his desire for her so red-hot it was almost sizzling, he began to move backward, forcing her to match him step for step, going in small, measured steps that would eventually lead them into his bedroom.

And while the unorthodox two-step was going on, he was undressing her, coaxing the silvery straps off her slender shoulders, tugging the shimmery material down her upper torso.

When the top portion of her dress had dipped to her waist, she felt Esteban’s mouth curving against hers. He was smiling, she realized incredulously.

“What?” she breathed, wanting to know what could have made him respond this way. Was he smiling? Or was he actually laughing at her?

She didn’t want to believe the latter.

“Just as I thought,” she heard him murmur as his palms cupped her breasts. “You’re not wearing a bra.”

Her eyes met his and he saw a positive wickedness come into the blue orbits. Her laugh was low and sultry and instantly wove itself underneath his skin, tantalizing him.

“That’s not all I’m not wearing,” she whispered just before her lips returned to his.

She’d fallen behind in the war on clothes and worked now to make up for it, pulling his jacket off his wide shoulders, then going on to attack his jeans, unbuckling, unbuttoning and pushing the denim down his taut hips and off his thighs.

She heard him catch his breath,
felt
his anticipation as it throbbed through his loins.

Her pulse accelerated as she felt her own anticipation heightening.

They’d made their way into the middle of the living room, a trail of his clothing marking the path. He had yet to explore the meaning behind her statement about more missing articles of clothing.

Steeling himself, holding tightly on to his last shred of control, Esteban pulled her dress farther down her torso, easing the fabric along her hips to discover that the thong he expected to see on her was nowhere to be found.

“Commando,” he murmured, referring to her lack of underwear.