Chainfire (55 page)

She could see him thinking, considering. It was a thrilling sight to see Richard’s mind back and working. She could still see, though, his hesitation. She didn’t want him to come this far and slip back now.

“People must have not believed you before, in other things,” she said. “Weren’t there ever times when this Kahlan of yours didn’t believe you? A real person would have sometimes disagreed with you, doubted you, argued with you. And when that happened, you must have done as you thought you had to, even though she thought you were wrong, maybe even a little crazy. I mean, come on, Richard, this isn’t the first time I’ve thought you were crazy.”

Richard smiled briefly before thinking it over. Then, a broad grin spread on his face.

“Yes, there certainly were times like that with Kahlan, when she didn’t believe me.”

“And you still did as you believed you had to, didn’t you?”

Richard, still smiling, nodded.

“Then don’t let this incident with your grandfather ruin your life.”

He lifted an arm and let it flop back down. “But it’s just that—”

“You gave up because of what Zedd told you without even using what you got from Shota.”

He looked up sharply, his attention suddenly riveted on her. “What do you mean?”

“In exchange for the Sword of Truth, Shota gave you information to help you find the truth. One of the things she told you was ‘What you seek is long buried.’

“But that’s not all. Cara told Zedd and me everything Shota said. Apparently the most vital thing she gave you, because it was the first and almost all she thought she had to tell you, was the word
Chainfire
. Right?”

Richard nodded as he listened.

“She then told you that you must find the place of the bones in the Deep Nothing. Shota also told you to beware the viper with four heads.

“What is Chainfire? What is the Deep Nothing? What is the viper with four heads? You paid a dear price for that information, Richard. What have you done with it? You came here and asked Zedd if he knew and he said no, then he told you that he was disappointed in you.

“So what? Are you going to throw away everything you’ve gained in your search just because of that? Because an old man who has no idea what Kahlan means to you or what you’ve been through the last couple of years thinks that you acted foolishly? Do you want to move in here and be his lapdog? Do you want to stop thinking and just depend on him to do your thinking for you?”

“Of course not.”

“At the grave Zedd was angry. He went through things we probably can’t imagine to get the Sword of Truth away from Shota. What would you expect him to say? ‘Oh, yes, that’s a good idea, Richard, just give it back to her; that’s fine.’ He had a lot invested in getting that sword back from her and he thought you made a foolish trade. So what? That’s his view. Maybe he’s even right.

“But you thought it was important enough to sacrifice something he had entrusted to you alone, something very precious to you, in order to gain a higher value. You believed that it was a fair trade. Cara said that at first
you even thought Shota might be cheating you, but then you came to believe that she had given you fair value. Did Cara tell it true?”

Richard nodded.

“What did Shota tell you about your bargain?”

Richard gazed up at the soaring towers behind Nicci as he recalled the words. “Shota said, ‘You wanted what I know that can help you find the truth. I have given it to you: Chainfire. Whether or not you realize it right now, I have given you a fair trade. I have given you the answers you needed. You are the Seeker—or at least, you were. You will have to seek the meaning to be found in those answers.’”

“And do you believe her?”

Richard considered a moment, his gazed dropping away. “I do.” When he looked back up into her eyes, the spark of life was again blazing there. “I do believe her.”

“Then you should tell me and Cara and your grandfather that if none of us are going to help you, then we ought to get out of your way and let you do as you must.”

He smiled, if somewhat sadly. “You’re a pretty remarkable woman, Nicci, to convince me to keep fighting even when you don’t believe in what I’m fighting for.” He leaned in and kissed her on the cheek.

“I truly wish I could, Richard…for your sake.”

“I know. Thank you, my friend—and I say friend because only a true friend would be more concerned with helping me face reality than what it means for her.” He reached out and, with his hand cupped to her face, used a thumb to wipe a tear from her cheek. “You have done more for me than you know, Nicci. Thank you.”

Nicci felt giddy joy mixed with sinking frustration that they were right back to where they had started.

Still, she wanted to throw her arms around him, but instead she simply cupped both her hands over his on the side of her face.

“Now,” he said, “I think we had better go see about Ann and Nathan, and then I need to find out what part Chainfire plays in all this. Will you help me?”

Nicci smiled as she nodded, too choked up to speak, and then, unable to stop herself, at last threw her arms around him and clutched him tightly to her.

The look on Ann’s face as she stepped in the big door and saw Nicci entering the anteroom from between two red pillars was priceless. Nicci would have laughed aloud had her talk with Richard not so emotionally drained her.

The prophet, Nicci knew, was very old, but he was by no means feeble looking. He was tall and broad-shouldered, with distinguished white hair that hung to his shoulders. He looked like a man who could bend iron, and he wouldn’t even need his gift to do so. It was the raptor gaze of his dark azure eyes, though, that made him at once intimidating and alluring. They were the eyes of a Rahl.

Ann stared, her own eyes wide. “Sister Nicci…”

The Prelate didn’t say “So good to see you again,” or anything cordial. She seemed momentarily unable to think of what to say. Nicci found it just a little remarkable that this squat woman beside the towering prophet had for so long seemed so big in her eyes. Novices and Sisters often went for long periods without even seeing the Prelate around the Palace of the Prophets. Absence, Nicci guessed, added to her mythic stature.

“Prelate. I’m glad to see you well, especially after your unfortunate death and funeral.” Nicci glanced over at Richard as she finished the thought. “I hear that everyone believed you were dead. Amazing how a burial can be so convincing, and yet here you are, alive and well, it would appear.”

Richard’s twitch of a smile told her that he caught her meaning. Zedd, to the side, at the brink of the three steps leading down into the center of the room with the fountain, gave Nicci a curious frown. The meaning hadn’t been lost on him, either.

“Yes, well, that was unfortunately necessary, child.” Ann’s expression darkened. “What with the Sisters of the Dark having infested the ranks of our Sisters of the Light.” She glanced briefly at Richard, Cara, and Zedd,
the edge to her countenance softening. “It appears by the company you keep, Sister Nicci, that you have come back into the fold. I can’t tell you how much it pleases me, personally. I can only think that the Creator Himself must have had a hand in saving your soul.”

Nicci clasped her hands behind her back. “The Creator had nothing to do with it, actually. I guess that while I was forced to spend my life serving everyone who decided they wanted the blood and sweat of my abilities, the Creator was busy. I guess he couldn’t be bothered while I was being used by pious men telling me how it was my duty to serve and to submit and to grovel to them and to kill those who opposed the Creator’s ways.

“I guess that all the times those champions of the Creator were raping me, the Creator didn’t catch on to the irony.

“No more. Richard helped show me the value of my life to myself. And it is no longer ‘Sister’ Nicci—either of the Light or the Dark. Nor is it Death’s Mistress, or the Slave Queen. It is just Nicci, now, if you please…and even if you don’t.”

Ann’s expression flashed between incredulity and indignation as her face went red. “But once you are a Sister you are always a Sister. You have done a wonderful thing and renounced the Keeper, so you are again a Sister of the Light. You can’t simply decide on your own to forsake your duty to the Creator’s—”

“If He has any objections, then let Him speak up right now!” As the echo of Nicci’s heated words faded away, the room fell silent but for the splash of water in the fountain. She made a show of looking around, as if if she thought that maybe the Creator might be hiding behind a pillar ready to pop out and make His wishes known.

“No?” She again clasped her hands. She put back on the defiant smile. “Well then, since He has no objections, Nicci it is, I guess.”

“I’ll not have—”

“Ann, enough,” Nathan said in a deep, commanding voice. “We have important business and this isn’t it. We didn’t travel all this way simply for a dead prelate to lecture a reformed Sister of the Dark.”

Nicci was somewhat surprised to hear the voice of reason coming from the prophet. She allowed that perhaps she had put too much stock into idle gossip.

Ann’s mouth twisted in resignation as she fingered a stray lock of hair into the loose bun at the back of her head. “I suppose you’re right. I’m
afraid that I’m a little out of sorts, my dear, what with all the trouble going on. Please forgive my rash presumption, will you, Nicci?”

Nicci bowed her head. “Happily, Prelate.”

Ann smiled, more genuinely, Nicci thought. “And it’s just Ann, now. Verna is Prelate, now. I’m dead, remember?”

Nicci smiled. “So you are, Ann. Wise choice, Verna. Sister Cecilia always said that there was no hope of converting that one to the Keeper.”

“Someday when we have the luxury of time, I would appreciate hearing more about Sister Cecilia in addition to Richard’s former teachers.” She sighed at the thought. “I never knew for sure that you and all five of the others were Sisters of the Dark.”

Nicci nodded. “I’d be happy to tell you what I know about them—the ones still alive, anyway. Liliana and Merissa are dead.”

“Tom, how is my sister?” Richard asked as soon as there was a brief break in the conversation. Nicci recognized that he had listened long enough and was signaling that he wanted to move on to more important matters.

“She is well, Lord Rahl,” the big blond-headed man near the door said.

“Good. Nathan, what’s going on?” Richard anxiously asked, getting right to the point. “What trouble are you here about?”

“Well…among other things, prophecy trouble.”

Richard visibly relaxed. “Oh. Well, that’s not something I can help you with.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure,” Nathan said, cryptically.

Zedd stepped off the gold and red carpet and down into the room. “Let me guess. You’re here about the blank places in the books of prophecy.”

Nicci had to run Zedd’s words through her mind a second time before she was sure she’d heard him right.

Nathan nodded. “You’ve just sat down in the middle of the muck.”

“What do you mean you’re here about blank places in the books of prophecy?” Richard looked suddenly suspicious. “What blank places?”

“Extensive sections of prophecy—that is, prophecy written down in the books of prophecy—have simply vanished off the pages of a number of the books we’ve so far inspected.” Nathan’s brow bunched in an expression of apprehension. “We’ve checked with Verna and she confirmed that the books of prophecy at the People’s Palace in D’Hara are suffering the same inexplicable problem. Therein lies the heart of our worry. We came, in part, to see if the works of prophecy here at the Keep are still intact.”

“I’m afraid not,” Zedd said. “The books here have been similarly corrupted.”

Nathan swiped a hand across his tired face. “Dear spirits,” he murmured. “We had been holding out hope that whatever is causing such havoc among the prophecies had not affected the books here as well.”

“You mean that entire sections of prophecy are missing?” Richard asked, stepping down into the heart of the room.

“That’s right,” Nathan confirmed.

“Would there happen to be a pattern to the missing prophecy?” Richard asked, suddenly focusing on a line of reasoning that Nicci knew would end up being somehow related to his own search. Ordinarily she would have been frustrated or even annoyed that he could think of nothing else but his fixation with the missing woman, but this time she was heartened to see that the familiar Richard was back.

“Why yes, there is a pattern. They are all prophecies having to do with events beginning roughly around the time of your birth.”

Richard stared, dumbfounded. “What are the missing prophecies about—specifically? I mean, are they related to specific events, or are they nonspecific and instead share only a time period?”

Nathan stroked his chin as he considered the question. “That’s the thing that makes this so strange. Many of the prophecies that are missing we know we should be able to recall, but they are suddenly and completely just as blank in our minds as they are on the page. We can’t remember a single word of them. We don’t recall what they were about, and since they’re gone from the books as well I can’t tell you if they were event related or time related—or something else. We realize that they are missing, but that’s about all.”

Richard’s eyes turned to Nicci, as if to ask if she caught the correlation. She thought he could see that she did. His voice remained casual, but Nicci knew how intent was the interest behind his words.

“Pretty odd that something you’ve known all your lives can just vanish right out of your memory, wouldn’t you say?”

“I certainly would,” Nathan said. “Any thoughts on the subject, Zedd?”

Zedd, who had been silently and intently watching Richard, nodded. “Well, I know what’s causing it, if that will help you out.”

He smiled innocently. Nicci noticed that Rikka, standing in the shad
ows back behind the red pillars, smiled as well. Nathan, at first stunned, became animated with curiosity.

Richard gently tugged Zedd’s robes at his shoulder. “You know?”

“You do?” Nathan asked, urging Richard back out of the way as he stepped closer. Ann rushed forward with him. “What is it? What’s happening? Tell us.”

“A prophecy worm, I’m afraid.”

Nathan and Ann blinked, their faces blank of any comprehension.

“A what?” Nathan finally ventured, somewhat cautiously, if not suspiciously.

“The text vanishing is caused by a prophecy worm. Once a fork of prophecy is infected with this scourge, it worms its way entirely through that branch, consuming it as it goes. Since it consumes the actual prophecy itself, that means that over time all manifestations of it, such as the written prophecy or any memory of it, are destroyed. It’s quite virulent.” Zedd regarded their rapt stares with another polite smile. “If you want, I can show you the reference work.”

“I should say so,” Nathan said.

“Zedd this is important,” Richard said. “Why haven’t you said something?”

Zedd gave him a familiar clap on the shoulder as he started away. “Well, my boy, when you arrived you weren’t much in the mood to listen to anything but what you were here about. Remember? You were rather insistent that you had trouble and you needed to talk to me about it. Since then you haven’t exactly been willing to talk. You’ve been rather…distracted.”

“I guess I was.” Richard caught his grandfather’s arm, halting him before he could get far. “Zedd, look, I need to tell you something about all of that, and about that night.”

“Like what, my boy?”

“I know that a contradiction cannot exist.”

“I never really thought you did, Richard.”

“But there was more to it that night. The rule most involved down there at the grave site was not the one you quoted. It may have seemed that way to you at the moment, but the rule I made a mistake about was another—the one that says in part that people can be made to believe a lie because they fear that it’s true. That’s what I was doing. I wasn’t believing a con
tradiction, I was believing a lie because I was so afraid it was true. The rule of noncontradiction is one of the ways I should have checked my assumptions. I didn’t, and in that I made a mistake.

“I understand what it must have looked like to you since you weren’t aware of everything that’s been happening, but that doesn’t mean I should have stopped looking for the truth out of a misplaced wish to make you happy, or out of fear of what you would think of me.”

He met Nicci’s gaze for a brief moment. “Nicci helped me see what I was doing wrong.”

He looked back at his grandfather. “I think you meant to show me that the rule you quoted is more, though. It also means you can’t hold contradictory values or goals. You can’t say, for instance, that honesty is a meaningful value, and at the same time lie to people. You can’t say that justice is your goal but refuse to hold the guilty responsible for their actions.

“At the heart of our struggle, the fact that contradictions can’t exist is why the Imperial Order’s regime is so ruinous. They hold up altruism as their highest purpose. Yet, out of their proclaimed selfless concern for one individual, they sacrifice another, soothing over the bloodletting by proclaiming that such a sacrifice is the moral duty of the sacrificial victim. It’s really nothing more than organized looting, a passion for the happiness of thieves and murderers without any concern for their victim. Attempts at goals that depend on such contradiction can only lead to widespread suffering and death. It’s the fraudulent advocacy of the right to life by embracing death as a means to achieve it.

“The rule you quoted means I can’t, like Jagang’s followers, say I want the truth and then, without checking my assumption, willingly believe a lie in its stead, even if out of fear. That’s the way I violated the rule you quoted. I should have sorted out what looked like contradictions and found the truth staring me in the face. That’s where I let myself down.”

“Are you saying that you now don’t believe that was Kahlan Amnell?” Zedd asked.

“Who says that corpse has to be the woman you think it is? There were no facts there to contradict my belief that it wasn’t her. I only believed there were out of fear that it was true. It wasn’t.”

Zedd took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “You’re stretching things mighty thin, Richard.”

“Am I? You wouldn’t be too pleased with my rationale if I said that there
is no such thing as prophecy and held up the blank books as proof that your belief in the existence of prophecy is wrong. For you to believe that prophecy exists in the face of the fact that the supposed books of prophecy are blank is not a contradiction. It is a perplexing situation with insufficient information to as of yet explain the facts. You have no obligation to reach a conclusion or hold an opinion you don’t accept for other reasons without adequate information or before you have finished investigating.

“What kind of Seeker would I be if I did that? After all, it’s the mind of the man that makes him the Seeker, not the sword. The sword is merely a tool—you’re the one who told me that.

“In the case of Kahlan, there are still too many unanswered questions for me to be convinced that what we saw that rainy night is really the truth. Until it’s proved one way or another, I’m going to continue to look for the answers—for the truth—because I believe that what is going on is far more dangerous than anyone but me realizes, to say nothing of needing to find a person I love who needs my help.”