Chameleon Soul (Chequered Flag #1) (9 page)

Chapter Fourteen

Raine

My head felt like a tank, followed by a herd of stampeding buffalo, had run over it when I woke up the next morning. My eyes were sore and I didn’t need to look in a mirror to know they were puffy—I could feel the swelling already. Beneath me the warm body I was resting my head on groaned and shifted. Instant spikes of guilt speared me in the chest as pieces of the night drifted back to me.

Favourable images of kissing Teo and finally admitting my true feelings were rapidly quashed by all of the events that took place after. Most of it was fuzzy, and sections were missing, but I had enough to remember Dustin carrying me home and crawling in bed beside me after he’d saved me from the group hunting me in my mind.

Carefully sliding out from under Dustin’s arm so as not to wake him, I eased myself off the mattress. He deserved to sleep after everything I’d put him through, no matter how much I wanted to wake him up and apologise profusely. It was only when I’d pulled on my oversized hoodie I realised I could smell something sweet cooking.

A cool shot of trepidation travelled down my spine, making me stand a little straighter. I crossed my fingers, praying it was Nadine who’d come over even though I knew deep down it wasn’t. She’d been partying too hard when I’d seen her, and I could only imagine how much worse she was by the time we left. No doubt she was still in bed either asleep or nursing a pounding hangover.

I inhaled deeply, holding my breath as I crossed the room to the door. I yanked it open and strode straight to the kitchen. Even though I knew it had to be Teo, the sight of him hunched over our tiny cooker still made my steps falter. After everything we’d said and done, I really shouldn’t have been surprised. However, the mortifying end to the night added a whole new dimension to our relationship, leaving me unsure of where we stood with each other.

He must have heard my gasp because he spun to face me. The smile he flashed was tight and there were deep circles beneath his eyes. His hair stuck up in every direction possible, like he’d run his hand through it too many times, and I found myself wanting to smooth it.

“Morning. You hungry?” he asked hesitantly. The intense desire that had filled his voice last night was nowhere to be found. He now gazed at me as if I had a big “approach with caution” sign stapled to my head.

“What are you making?”

He stepped away from the hob so I could see, and my eyes widened in surprise, the corners of my lips tilting up as my mouth began to water.

“You remember?”

“Of course. I take it you still like blueberry pancakes?”

I looked at him like he was stupid. “Do you really have to ask?”

That drew a more genuine smile from him. “No, you’ve always had a sweet tooth.”

He turned back to the pancakes and I retrieved a bottle of orange juice from the fridge, pouring two glasses while he plated up the food. We moved to the sofa in the living room, where I placed the glasses on the coffee table and Teo handed me a plate.

“Thanks.”

It was stupid, but I couldn’t prevent the regret from making my expression droop and the sigh escaping my lips. I hadn’t had blueberry pancakes since the day before Teo and I broke up. It was what he cooked for me every Sunday morning when we were together, and I hadn’t been able to touch them since. I had tried once, and the wave of sadness it had cast over me was enough encouragement to never try again.

“What’s wrong, baby?”

I peered up at him through my lashes with a weak smile and held back the tears. “I’ve missed your pancakes.”

“Was that all you ever liked me for? My cooking skills?”

“That and your takeout ordering skills.”

“Can’t argue with that. No one can order takeout quite like me.”

I laughed and returned my gaze to my plate, finally cutting off the first piece of pancake and bringing it up to my lips. As soon as the buttery, melt-in-your-mouth flavour hit my tongue, I moaned and closed my eyes to savour the taste.

“Are you sure that’s all that’s bothering you?” Teo asked.

Glancing up at him, it surprised me to see he’d already devoured one pancake. When the silence dragged on, Teo’s mouth tightened into a grim line.

“I saw everything last night, Raindrop.”

“Oh?”

“Really? Is that all you’re going to say?”

I placed my cutlery on my plate, the metal clanging. “What do you want me to say, Teo?”

“How about an explanation?”

For a moment I allowed the silence to linger, considering whether I really could tell him the truth. Teo wasn’t some random person. I’d known him most of my life, and we’d dated for two years. However, something still held me back. Telling him may not have affected his racing at that moment in time, yet it would have had other drastic consequences. I wanted nothing more than for everything to be out in the open. But how do you tell the person you love you left them because you share a twisted past with their biggest rival?

I knew Teo better than he knew himself. If he ever found out what had happened to me, he’d stop at nothing until the people responsible paid for their actions. Anger would consume him if the truth came to light, and I couldn’t allow that.

“Please, Raine? It’s not going to make me think less of you or change my feelings for you. I only want to know what happened. The Raine I knew wasn’t scared of anything.”

I stared at the sky through the window. “I changed and she’s gone.”

“But why?”

I opened my mouth, only no sound came out. I placed my plate on the table and moved to stand. I was about to slide past Teo when he stopped me with a hand on my waist. His thumb landed right on my scar, as if he knew its exact location, but that was a ridiculous thought. There was no possible way for him to know it was there; it had to be a coincidence when his thumb moved over the five-inch line.

“I’m sorry, baby. I’m moving too fast, aren’t I? We need to get to know each other again first. We’ve both changed, even if it’s only been a year. How about we go out, just the two of us?”

I tilted my head to the side with a teasing smile. “Are you asking me on a date?”

He coughed, clearing his throat. “Depends. If I am, will you say yes?”

“What did you have in mind?”

“It’s a surprise. Be ready to leave in an hour.” He pulled me closer to him so I was standing between his legs. Our lips met briefly, the taste of orange juice lingering on Teo’s lips. Too soon he leaned back, separating us. I could see in his eyes he wanted more just like me. There wasn’t any amount of time that would make my body forget his touch. It only responded to him, and had been without it too long.

Teo dropped his hand from my cheek, the burning sensation from his touch still tingling. If it hadn’t been for the thoughts of spending all day with him bubbling with excitement in me, I would have protested. However, I wanted a day like we used to have; to feel like my old self because only around Teo did it shine through.

I tried to shut the door as quietly as possible so as not to wake Dustin when I entered my room again, but he stirred anyway. With a lazy groan, he rolled onto his back and dragged a hand over his eyes.

“Raine?” he queried, his voice gravelly and deep from sleep.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” I whispered even though he was already awake and peering at me through one eye. Shifting so he leaned back to rest on his elbows, Dustin regarded me carefully. It was a look I’d come to know well after a night like the last.

“How are you holding up?”

I mulled over his question. I hadn’t really stopped to think about everything too deeply because of Teo. Somehow he’d made me forget to overanalyse everything, and I actually felt good for once, if a little guilty.

“I feel fine. I’m sorry I ruined your night.”

“You didn’t ruin anything. The night swiftly started to go downhill after Elora phoned to ‘congratulate’ me on my win, AKA, to get back together with me.”

“Please tell me you didn’t.”

“Not this time. Anyway, that’s not important. I’m more worried about you.”

I really didn’t deserve him. “I’m fine, although Teo saw so it’s all been for nothing.”

“You’ve told him then?”

“No, of course not. We’re taking things slow.”

With a groan, Dustin dropped his face into his hands.

“What?”

“You should tell him, Raine. Now’s the perfect time. As for slow, you and Teo never did slow, so good luck with that.”

“I need a bit more time. I’ve only just got him back, I can’t lose him again because…well, you know why. We need to reconnect first.”

Dustin rolled his eyes at me. “First of all, you’re not going to lose him by telling him the truth. You’re more likely to do that by keeping it from him. Secondly, you two never disconnected.” I opened my mouth to argue and he held up a hand to silence me. “Don’t deny it. Even when you were apart you followed every single race. In your heart you never left him.”

I sank down on the corner of the bed. “I know, but his life’s a lot different now. I need to protect myself.”

“Is this about media attention again?”

Damn, he knew me too well.

Teo’s life had changed dramatically. He was now in the spotlight, and I didn’t know if I could ever be the person he needed. How could I when so many things sent me into a panic? His career had caused everything wrong in my life and I couldn’t survive an ordeal like the last one all over again.

“Teo will protect you, Raine. He always has and always will. Give him a chance and let him in.”

I began gathering the clothes I wanted to wear. I knew I’d have to tell Teo eventually, but I needed time.

Chapter Fifteen

Teo

As soon as the words “go slow” slipped from my lips I wanted to kick myself. When I saw Raine exit the bathroom in denim shorts and a tight-fitting t-shirt, I wanted to punch myself in the face too. The last thing I craved was to go slow with her. As a racer, “slow” wasn’t in my DNA. I wanted to take her against every surface in the damned flat until she became so delirious with pleasure she’d tell me anything I wanted to hear.

I’d been trying—unsuccessfully—to block her out of my life for a year, and now she was all I could think about. It was only the fear of pushing her too far too quickly that had me reining in my emotions and suggesting taking things slow.

That didn’t mean it wasn’t a struggle to keep my eyes on the road and not on her bare legs as I drove. It took every ounce of self-restraint to stop from reaching over and running my hand up and down her silky thighs. It didn’t help that she constantly shifted around on her seat, clearly nervous about where I was taking her.

Mercifully, my torment was short lived. I pulled into the car park and Raine’s eyes widened with recognition, a smile tugging the corners of her lips.

“You’re taking me go-karting?” she squealed in delight and the sound sent a burst of pleasure through my heart. I wanted to see her happy and be the one to make her smile, especially when I’d seen her in so much pain last night.

I’d asked Dustin for advice while she had been in the shower. I wanted to make this day one she wouldn’t forget for all of the right reasons. The problem was, I didn’t know who Raine was anymore. So many things set her off, and although I hated going to my little brother, he was the only one who could help.

The list of things to avoid he’d given me were ingrained in my mind:

1) Make sure there aren’t crowds.

2) Try not to draw attention to her in public.

3) No alleyways or small passages.

4) Be home before dark.

5) Don’t let the press see us.

He’d not been subtle in his reminder that I wasn’t the same person anymore either, and people now cared what I did and who I dated. I’d become so used to the cameras and the lifestyle that came with being a top racer it had drifted into the background. Raine wasn’t used to it though, and for that reason I’d hired out the entire track to ensure privacy.

“Do you still like it?” We used to go all of the time back when I was karting. Dustin, Raine, and I practically lived at the track over the summers. She didn’t always race with us, but I’d always thought it a bonus when she did, even if I had been in denial about my feelings back then.

“It’s been ages since I’ve been here. Why is it so empty?” she stated, peering around the empty car park in bewilderment.

“It’s just us today.”

Her lips parted in surprise, making me want to close the distance between us and taste her once more.

“You hired the
whole
place?”

“I thought it’d be better without crazy fans here, and I wouldn’t lose my reputation when I let you win.”

She rolled her eyes. “First of all, you’ve
never
let me win and I never want you to. Even if you are in the big leagues now, it’ll only give me more satisfaction when you lose. Secondly, how much did this friggin’ cost?”

I laughed, a deep throaty laugh. Raine had always been competitive, and on the odd occasion she’d beaten both me and Dustin. We’d told her we let her to save face, but she never bought it and refused to let it go for at least a month. Her constant bragging was one of the motivations for me to get better. I’d probably be nowhere if I wasn’t worried I’d have to listen to her immodest comments twenty-four seven. I’m kidding.

“It was cheaper than you think because I agreed to do a bit of promotion for the place, that’s all I’m telling you.”

“Teo—”

This time I closed the gap between us. My lips met hers softly until she stopped speaking. The hint of spearmint toothpaste still lingered on her breath and I nipped her bottom lip.

“Just enjoy it, Raindrop. You’re worth every penny.”

She huffed in mock frustration and turned to exit the car. I met her around the front, drawing her under my arm. I wasn’t tall by any stretch at five-foot-ten, though that was common for Formula One drivers. The taller and bigger you were, the more it impacted your racing. Nonetheless, Raine fit perfectly under my arm. She leaned into me, wrapping an arm around my waist, and I squeezed her in encouragement.

“I didn’t think I’d ever see you two back here!” a voice shouted behind us. Raine stiffened into my side then relaxed a second later. I assumed it was because she recognised Jerry, the owner’s, voice, yet I’d liked to have thought she calmed because she felt safe with me.

He strode towards us.

“Like I could ever forget this place,” I said.

“Sally said you rang up and hired the whole place out. I didn’t believe her, but here you are.”

I shook the hand he offered, his jolly personality not dampened by his age. Jerry and his wife Sally had owned the place for twenty years after inheriting it from his dad. It was a family run business and part of the charm.

“I wanted some time alone with my girl. You know, back for the summer and all that.”

Jerry’s smile dropped ever so slightly and he gave me a curt nod. “Well, you have a good one there. Make sure you keep hold of her.”

“I intend to.” I met his steely gaze with one of my own. I assumed he’d seen and heard of my antics and was warning me not to hurt Raine. Normally a statement like that would have riled me, but I’d known Jerry my whole life. He said it with his best intentions even if he didn’t have the entire story.

“I’ll leave you alone then. Sally’s working the booth.”

“Thanks, Jerry, I’ll see you around. Make sure you contact my manager when you want me to do the promo.”

“Will do.” Jerry nodded and then was gone.

Raine had barely said a word.

“You okay?” I asked her.

She smiled up at me. “Fine. Let’s go so you can get your humiliation of losing to me over with.”

“You really think you can beat me? This is what I do for a living and I’ll be World Champion this year.”

Though she feigned indifference, her eyes held a competitive glint. “I’ve done it before. And you had better be World Champion because then I can say I beat the best, which would make
me
the best driver in the world.”

“I don’t think it works like that, Raindrop.”

“Sure it does. If you beat them and I beat you it means I’m better.”

“Whatever you say, baby.”

Sally led us into the cabin used to store all of the equipment. Because of the hot weather we could forgo overalls, so we both only grabbed a balaclava and helmet. Raine pulled her hair into a side braid. Her fingers slid through the locks with ease, her lips pursed in concentration as she plaited it. She was so focused she didn’t even notice when I slipped my phone from my back pocket to snap a photo of her.

“Hey, Raine,” I called when she’d slipped the balaclava over her face. As soon as she looked up at me I snapped another picture.

Her eyes widened when she realised what I’d done. “Nooo, delete that!” She stomped towards me, eyes locked on the phone. A split second before she moved to grab it, I pulled it out of her reach. She jumped a little, straining for the device, but I only moved it further back.

“Not a chance.” Catching her around the waist as she landed, I pulled her flush against me with one arm to still her movements. I kissed her nose, keeping the phone above my head as I backed us towards the lockers.

“Please?” She looked up at me through her eyelashes and pouted, which only made me dip my head lower and meld my lips with hers. I could never resist her pout.

“Nope,” I murmured against her lips then drew away. Throwing my items into one of the lockers, I slammed it shut and grinned devilishly at her. She frowned, yet it only made my smile grow bigger because of the comical look caused by the black balaclava framing her face.

“Come on.” I picked up her helmet and passed it to her. I took her hand. “Ready to lose?”

“In your dreams.”

“When you’re in my dreams we’re definitely not karting, Raindrop.”

No, normally she appeared naked or in some stage of undress and the thought had my cock twitching. From her knowing, flushed look, Raine knew exactly what I meant.

She jabbed me in the side, causing me to flinch away. I dodged the next attack and I could see the twinkle in her eyes. She liked where my thoughts were as much as I did.

On her third jab I caught her hand, bringing it up to my lips. “You love it really.”

“I know you don’t need the usual talk,” Sally interrupted, “but I have to give it for legal reasons or else Health and Safety will be on my back.” She proceeded to explain how the karts worked and the usual procedures. I remained focused on Raine. She had her helmet under one arm, her hip cocked as she listened intently. For once she didn’t look poised to flee.

Only when she dropped my hand and slid into the seat of her kart did I realise Sally had finished. Even then I stalled, watching the way her shorts rode up her legs. I wanted to run my hands up her thighs and then follow them with my lips.

A hand on my shoulder pulled me from my thoughts. “I’m glad you found your way back to her. You two belong together.”

I flashed Sally a smile. “Me too. Thank you for making this possible.”

“Are you going to race me or are you going to stand there yakking like an old woman all day?” Raine snapped impatiently.

“So eager to lose, baby?”

She didn’t acknowledge me, remaining quiet as I slid into my own kart behind hers with a chuckle.

I wasn’t going to let her win. I also didn’t know how long I was going to be able to go slow with her. I wanted everything, for Raine to give herself to me completely.