Chance Assassin: A Story of Love, Luck, and Murder (42 page)

“Of course I will,” I said.  “I’d do it if you wanted me to.”

He shook his head, and didn’t say anything else.

Bella had parked across two spots, one of them handicapped.  I was tempted to warn her about leaving her mail where someone could see it, but Charlie wouldn’t have enough time to send someone on her trail for taking his parking spot.  She was leaning against her hood, a manila envelope I could only assume was Frank’s criminal record under her ass to keep her from dirtying her dress.

He didn’t look at the file, he just carefully folded it and stuck it inside his coat where it would be safe from prying eyes.  I wanted to hold his hand, but I’d had enough brushes with death to last a lifetime, and being queer near power tools was a bad idea.

“Do you know where you’re going?” Frank asked as I took the lead.

“If anyone does, it’s me,” I said.  Frank had called it a pipe store, which proved how much he knew.  And as for Bella, well, Minolo Blahnik didn’t design screwdrivers.  It was nice to be butch, even if it was only by comparison.  “Don’t ask for directions, it’s a sign of weakness.”

Bella took Frank’s arm, her shoes clacking across the linoleum.  Every man in the building was watching us.  Watching
her
.  I could just imagine what they were thinking.  Two homosexuals, one of them gasp! French, and a fashionista.  What in God’s name could
we
be after.

“I dislocated my shoulder in a store like this when I was little,” I said.  Even though it would make me stick out even more, I wished I’d remembered to put on some foundation.  I must’ve looked like I’d already shown my pretty little face where it didn’t belong, and had enjoyed my gay bashing so much I wanted another.  “Actually, my dad dislocated it.  Not on purpose, but he got scared when I’d wandered off after he told me to stay put.  It wasn’t my fault because there was this guy there asking me to come look at screws with him and I was too young to know what a sexual innuendo was so I followed him and my dad found me and yanked me away.  By the arm.  We told my mom it was an accident.”

“Nervous, V?” Frank laughed.

“Shut up,” I said.

“It smells funny in here.”

I rolled my eyes.  “Bookstores smell funny.”

He swatted me.  I looked around to make sure no one saw, which of course, everyone had.  Although, I didn’t know what I was afraid of.  Frank hadn’t hesitated to shoot his brother for harming me, and was shopping for the perfect length of metal to bash his surrogate father’s head in for discouraging my well being.  He wouldn’t even blink before defending me in here.

“Pipes,” I said proudly, holding out my hands like a magician revealing a finale to his magic trick.

Frank picked one up, smacked it in his hand, and put it down to try another.

“We’re going to be here fucking forever,” Bella sighed, and took my arm.  “Come along, Vincent.  Let’s find some screws.  We have much to discuss.”

Frank glanced at us apprehensively, but said nothing as Bella led me away, her heels click-clacking our departure.

“You’ll want to stay away from the brass ones,” I said, turning to look over my shoulder.  “They’re too soft.”

He smiled at me.  It wasn’t until Bella was pulling me out of the aisle that I realized his smile had been one of pity.  She was speeding up.  She was leading us straight toward the bathrooms.  Oh fuck, I’d put the idea of being molested in a hardware store into her haggis-filled head and she was going to do horrible things to me!

“Let’s see then,” she said, shoving me backwards against the wall in the lady’s room.  It was empty, not surprisingly.  Bella was probably the first woman to enter the premises wearing a skirt to correspond with the picture on the door.

She looked like the very definition of a man-eater as she stood there, her eyes glinting with bad intentions.  I was tempted to cry out “leave me alone, vile woman, I’m just a boy!” but she was already pulling my shirt up, unconcernedly peeling away the gauze and tape like it was a price tag on an item she had no intention of paying for.

Bella frowned.  I hoped that meant she wouldn’t continue the strip search.  How could Frank let me go off with her?  “That’s a new scar.”

“New and old,” I sighed.  She wasn’t looking to rape me.  That was a relief.  “How did you know about my scar?”

“Frankie told me,” she said, as if that was obvious.  It was, of course, no one else could have told her.  But
when
?  He’d been giving her the cold shoulder since she was on the road to recovery.  And why?

“He told you?” I asked.

She traced her finger along the upside-down V.  If I could’ve backed up, I would have.  Her nails looked as sharp as the instrument that caused my new wound, and I remembered the expression on Henry’s face when he gave it to me.  “Aye.  He said he’d met someone perfect, but you were flawed now so maybe he had a chance with you.  Then I stopped hearing from him so I figured it must’ve worked out.  You are him, aren’t you?  The little blond tart Charlie sent on a robbery?”

I smiled.  Frank was in so much trouble.  “He called me a tart?”

“You
are
a tart, look at you,” she said.  “Do they sell chainsaws here?”

“No,” I said firmly, hoping it was true.  Bella was truly horrifying.  No wonder Frank had so many fond memories of working with her.  It had to be like watching a napalm attack.

She held up her tiny purse and pulled out some Dior foundation.  I was beginning to wonder what kind of agency employed these two.  Cigarettes, a gun, and expensive makeup were all she was carrying.

Bella was unexpectedly gentle with the application.  Almost as much as Frank, though he usually had to be a bit rough with me to get me to wear it.  “You don’t want to give Charlie the satisfaction of seeing bruises,” she said. “Even if he is about to die.”

“Do you think Frank will be okay?”

“He’s going to be a wreck,” she said. “But he’ll get over it.”

“What was he like when he was my age?” I asked.  I knew Frank wouldn’t approve of us talking about him, and was in fact probably on his way to prevent it from occurring, but for the time being we were locked in a bathroom he might hesitate to enter.

Bella smiled.  “He was a pain in the arse.  Same as he is now.  But he was always a gentleman.  And good at his job.  Better than I ever was.”

“Have
you
considered retiring?” I asked, hoping I wouldn’t get slapped for mentioning the R-word.

“This is the only thing I’m good at,” she laughed.

Maybe I was just projecting, but in that moment, I thought I saw right through her.  She wasn’t as tough as she looked after all.  She was a little girl who had no choice but to stay behind while her big brother went off to a happy, normal life.  She was as scared of being stuck as I used to be.  And the saddest part was that she had no idea the hostility he’d held for her.

“Frank won’t keep in touch,” I said.

She nodded.  “I know.  He doesn’t like the telephone.  And writing letters can be incriminating.  Even if he’s going…er…straight.”

“I’ll write to you,” I said.  And I would, no matter what Frank said, no matter how much he wanted to distance himself from her and what he used to be.  What
we
used to be.

“That would be nice, Vincent,” she said with a smile.  It was the first time I’d seen her smile without something devious going on in her eyes.  Then she leaned up on her toes and kissed my cheek, leaving a fresh, dark stain on my made-up face.  “Tell him I said goodbye, will you?  I’ve never been good at that sort of thing.”

And with that she left, her heels clicking down the brightly lit, extra wide aisles.  Toward the chainsaws.

We sat in silence for several minutes before he started the car.  Frank had known that Bella was going to take off, though he wasn’t pleased with her for leaving me alone.  But she hated getting emotional even more than he did, and it wasn’t like he was far away.  I didn’t tell him I’d said I would write to her.  He had other things to think about.

“It’s a nice pipe,” I said, admiring the shiny silver sticking out of the beige plastic bag as we drove to where we’d be using it.  It would match his wedding ring.  “Good and sturdy.  Ideal for…pipe things.”

I felt anxious like I was getting ready to meet my boyfriend’s parents for the first time, not show up to kill them.  Charlie knew about us now, and he’d had time to let the idea simmer that his beloved Frankie boy was a homosexual.  Not to mention that he had no idea I’d pulled through, and seeing me again wouldn’t be a happy reunion.

Still, I’d remain on my best behavior.  Frank had told me that when he snuck off to beat the shit out of Mark, he’d stopped by the cemetery and visited my parents’ graves.  He’d told them that he’d take care of me.  The least I could do was promise Charlie the same.

Charlie’s car was parked right outside his room.  It looked like it had been there for months, but then, it always looked like that.  Frank got out of the car, coming to my side to take my hand.  At first I thought he was just being a good husband, since I had some trouble getting in and out these days, but he didn’t let me go.

Frank knocked with his foot, keeping the pipe up his sleeve and his hand on mine.

The door opened, releasing a heavy cloud of cigarette smoke.  “Well, surprise, surprise,” Charlie said with a bit of a laugh, not sounding surprised at all.  “Come on in, kids.”

I looked around the room, my eyes falling on a ratty looking puppy tied to the bathroom doorknob.  The dog cocked its little head, practically vibrating with excitement.

Charlie ignored me and hugged Frank.

Frank didn’t return the embrace, his body completely stiff, but he did move his face against Charlie’s head, his expression already full of mourning.

Charlie patted his back and then his cheek, warmly, tenderly, like a father.  I’d never seen them being affectionate with each other.  It made me miss
my
dad.  “So, this is it then?” he asked, and he lit a cigarette.  Then he handed him an envelope that looked worn from being handled.  “I never paid you for that thing in Chicago.”

Frank took it and handed it straight over to me without looking at the contents.  “Vincent killed him.  I lied to you.  He’s a natural.”

I peeked in long enough to see that he hadn’t given him a discount for the man I killed, and put the envelope in my coat.  Frank never told me he’d billed for him.

Charlie chuckled scornfully.  “I must say, Frankie boy, I never would’ve guessed you were a queer.  I suppose it stems from being on the inside, huh?  All those lonely guards.  And you with such a pretty face, scared silent.”

I stopped breathing, staring at Charlie in horror.  There were already tears in my eyes, imagining Frank, innocent, shy Frank, catatonic from trauma, at the mercy of men worse than Charlie. 
Real
wardens.

Frank laughed incredulously.  “Don’t toy with me, Charlie.  Not this late in the game.”

“Are you going to tell me it didn’t happen?  You don’t remember, kiddo.  You don’t remember anything. 
He
believes me.  Don’t you, Vincent?”

“Frank,” I said, but I couldn’t say anything else.  It explained so much.  But then, so did the things he
did
remember, what had happened with his mother, his lack of social interaction.

“Relax, V,” he said.  “It never happened.  That little lie was directed at you.”

Charlie smiled.  “You sure?  Why don’t you let him stick his dick in you?  See what memories come back.”

Frank shook his head pityingly.  It wasn’t getting to him.  I wished I could’ve said the same for myself. 

“I know your tricks, Charlie,” he said.  “I know
you
.  But it doesn’t matter.  Whatever happened, it doesn’t make any difference.  Because I’m happy.  And I have you to thank for that.  Vincent and I never would’ve met if not for you.”  Then he laughed.  “Cheers.”

Charlie grinned, trying to look pleased though his expression was one of bitter defeat.  Then he sat on the bed, taking the last cigarette from his pack.  He paused for a second, and offered it to Frank.

“I quit,” he said, but he sat down by his side and leaned over to light it for him.  “I’d appreciate an apology.  That wasn’t a nice thing to say.”

Charlie glanced at him and shrugged.  “I bought you a dog.  Thought you’d be lonely without…Vincent.”  Then he looked at me contemptuously.  “You’d better take care of him.”

“I will,” I said through gritted teeth that had nothing to do with how his voice affected my fillings.  I was utterly disgusted with him, and I wanted to get Frank the hell out of there.

He turned back to Frank, all the hostility gone.  “Believe me when I tell you this, kiddo, I only wanted the best for you.  I didn’t know what he was really after.”

Frank nodded, and he took the cigarette from between his lips, tossing it to the pile of dirty clothes on the floor.  Then he hugged him with one arm and kissed the side of his balding head, and he stood up with his back to me.  “Bye, Charlie,” he said, his voice cracking with emotion.

“
Au revoir
, Frankie boy,” he said.

I grabbed the dog’s leash and rushed out as I heard the first swing, a wet crunch with a metallic echo.  My head was pounding.  I hoped Charlie’s felt worse.

I put on Frank’s sunglasses and walked shakily to the car with our new pet, filled with a sickening sense of unease courtesy of my very recently deceased father-in-law.  How could he have lied about something so unspeakable?  And what if it hadn’t been a lie?

Frank didn’t talk the rest of the day.  He didn’t cry.  He didn’t look at me.  He wouldn’t even look at the dog, which was doing everything in her power to make him.

I scratched her ears.  The dog had fleas, and I was starting to itch, but it didn’t seem right to put her in the backseat.  Not after she’d been stuck in Charlie’s hotel room for the past few weeks, living on secondhand smoke and fast-food.

He pulled off the freeway, his hand grazing my knee as he changed gears.  I knew where we were going.  We’d gone dozens of times.  Fire cleansed everything, and we had one thing left to burn.