Change of Heart (3 page)

Becca liked the older woman on sight. She had her gray hair wound in a bun and spectacles perched on her nose. She represented the perfect picture of a grandmother. “It's a pleasure to meet you. I appreciate all you have done for my sister.”

“I am a widow and alone. My husband died last year. We did not have any children. Ruth is like a daughter to me.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “From what I have heard your sister has blossomed since you have been staying with her. She misses Caleb, and it broke her heart to lose him. She has never gotten over it. She confides in me about this often. She is excited and happy you are here. You are like a bright ray of sunshine in her life.”

Ruth finished with Mrs. Sanderson and joined Becca and Margaret. “Come and sit with me at the drawing table. I will show you a dress in
Godey's Lady's Book
similar to the one I am designing. Margaret, I found a dress in the catalog I would like to make for you. I will point it out to you.” She flipped through the pages of the book.

Margaret's eyes brightened. “I like the green one you picked out for me. I would love it if you would make it for me.”

“I will draw a pattern for it tomorrow.” She patted Becca's hand. “Is there anything you would like me to make for you?”

Becca shook her head. “No thank you. Not yet.” She glanced at the pages with Margaret and Ruth. She liked a lot of the dresses offered in
Godey's Lady's Book,
but she wanted to wait a little longer before trying on one of Ruth's dresses or having her make her one. She was comfortable in her plain clothes. It was a part of her past she wasn't ready to let go of yet.

An hour later, Margaret yawned and stretched her arms. “I would love to talk more, but I must finish my mending. If I do not, I will be behind in my work for the rest of the week.”

Ruth closed the book. “It is getting late in the afternoon. We better head home.” Ruth and Becca hugged her friend and left.

Walking past the many shops and restaurants on Main Street, Becca pondered what Margaret had told her about Ruth since Caleb's death. Her sister hadn't indicated her sadness in the letters she sent. Since Becca had been here, they had laughed, stayed up late and chatted, worshipped in Ruth's church, and enjoyed picnics, shopping, and dining together. She had enjoyed herself. She had no doubt Ruth had too. She couldn't imagine leaving her sister to go home.

What did the future hold for her and Matt? She must find out. She had grown roots in Massillon. She couldn't go back to her old life and be happy. Yes, she would tell her parents and Grace she had chosen to make a life in Massillon soon. Ruth's voice jerked her out of her thoughts.

“Matt is sitting by the window at Lizzie's. No one is with him. I am hungry. We should join him.” Ruth hurried to the restaurant.

Good idea.
Becca followed her sister. She pushed returning to Berlin to talk to her parents out of her mind.

As soon as they walked through the door, Matt stood and beckoned to them. “Come and sit with me.”

Dishes clanged and patrons' conversations buzzed. Becca and Ruth squeezed through the narrow pathway between chairs to Matt's table.

Always the gentleman, Matt seated them before he sat.

Lizzie removed a pencil from behind her ear. She blew a strawberry blond hair from her ruddy face. “Becca, you've ordered chicken and dumplings every time you've come in. Are you ordering it today?” Hands on her hips, she cocked her head.

“Yes. Did you bake any cobbler this morning?”

“I baked a fresh cherry cobbler an hour ago. I'll set a piece aside for you.”

Ruth ordered the same meal as Becca. Matt told them he had ordered the venison stew earlier.

The door chimed when Lizzie left to pass their orders on to the cook. Becca glanced up. David. Her heart thudded against her chest. She had hoped to never run into him again. What could he want?
Nothing I would care to discuss.

He approached her, holding his hat. “Will you step outside with me for a few minutes? I need to talk to you.”

Her face heated.
No,
but she would. She wanted him out of here before he said anything to embarrass her further. She took a deep breath and gestured to Ruth and Matt. “David, this is Dr. Matt Carrington, and this is my sister, Ruth Smith.”

Matt stood and shook David's hand.

“Hello, Mrs. Smith.” He fidgeted with his hat.

Ruth stayed seated and gave him a curt nod.

David eyed Becca. “What I have to say won't take long.”

No, it won't.
She couldn't stand the sight of him. He had approached her in front of a roomful of people just like on their wedding day. Why hadn't he waited until she left the restaurant and approached her then? “I'll be right back.” She followed him out the door. “How did you find me?”

“When I returned from Lancaster, my parents told me you left to visit your schweschder in Massillon. When I arrived here, I asked the owner of the general store if he knew Ruth Smith, and he told me where she lived. On the way to her haus, I recognized you through the restaurant window.”

Hand on hip, she squinted. “Why are you here?”

“Is there somewhere quiet where we can talk?”

She pointed across the street. The least amount of time she spent with him the better. A walk too far would add to this awkwardness. She would remain as close to Lizzie's as possible. “The post office is closed. We can sit on the bench by the front door. No one will bother us.”

Her heart thudded against her ribs, as he followed her. She had nothing to say to him, and she could care less about anything he had to say to her. She hoped he would make this meeting a short one.

In front of the post office, she waited for him to speak.

He passed his hat from one hand to the other. “I'm sorry for leaving you the way I did. I would like to make it up to you by asking you to marry me.”

She narrowed her eyes. He must be out of his mind. “No, I am not interested in marrying you. Why aren't you marrying the woman in Lancaster?”

He bowed his head and spoke in a whisper. “She refused to wed me. I told her I had arranged with your daed to marry you but changed my mind at the last minute. It didn't sit well with her. I would've kumme to you earlier, but I stayed in Lancaster for a while to help my uncle build an addition to his haus. I've given this a lot of thought. You and I should get married. I need to follow through with the commitment I made to your daed to wed you. Besides, we are both twenty and should be married by now.”

She clenched her jaw. She would never marry a man who wanted to be wed to another woman. Besides, she cared about someone else. Someone she could trust. “As I stated, I won't marry you.”

“You're getting older, and there aren't many available men in our community left. You should reconsider.” David stared at the birthmark on her hand.

She hid her hand under her apron and squinted. “Like I said, I'm not interested.” The more he prattled on, the more stern and coldhearted his tone became. If she had married him, she pictured her life as a miserable one.

He stood and mashed his hat on his head. “You'll be sorry. I could've provided a good living for you. I intend to find a fraa, and I won't be available when you return to Berlin.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets. “I'm staying at Daisy's Boarding House tonight and leaving in the morning. If you change your mind, you can find me there.” He stomped off.

She heaved a sigh. She had no intention of changing her mind about not marrying him. Too bad he couldn't leave tonight. She hoped he found someone else to marry soon. Then he wouldn't bother her anymore. She waited until he turned the corner before heading to the restaurant. As she pushed the door open, they waved her over. Her chicken and dumplings sat on the table.

Matt seated her. “Are you all right?”

She sipped lemonade to gather her thoughts. David was an arrogant man. How dare he come here and assume she'd marry him after what he did to her. She thought her head would explode. He had glanced at her birthmark, as if to remind her she was flawed. He had traits she knew she didn't want in a husband. “Yes, I'm fine.”

Ruth patted her hand. “I told Matt about your unfortunate wedding day. What did David want?”

She recounted her conversation with David. She opened her mouth to speak about what a dishonest and heartless man he appeared to be but shut it. Bad mouthing David wouldn't make her feel any better, and it would cast a bad light on her character. She swallowed hard. “I'm glad it's over, and he's gone.”

Matt pushed his back against the chair. “I am glad you refused to take him up on his offer and sent him on his way, because I would be lost without you.”

Her heart soared. He couldn't have said anything more perfect. Each day she liked Matt more, and it warmed her heart to learn he valued her. She didn't want to, but she would need to leave him for a little while. She had to deliver her news about leaving Berlin for good to her parents and Grace in person, rather than letting them know in a letter. It wouldn't be an easy conversation to have with them. She would wait for a week or two.

Chapter Three

Monday morning, Matt greeted Dorothy then joined Becca in the exam room, where she stocked supplies. The sun shone bright through the window and showcased her flawless skin.

She dropped thermometers in a container of alcohol. “I'm sorry David interrupted our dinner yesterday.”

“Do not apologize. You did the right thing sending him on his way. He does not deserve you.”

She blushed and dropped a box of cotton.

He bent to pick it up, and their hands touched. He met her gaze and held it.
Those eyes, how beautiful.
The door burst open and interrupted them. Micah, a little boy with tousled brown hair and freckles across his nose, hurried toward him. “Dr. Matt, I falled and am bleedin'.” He held his arm up.

Matt grabbed a clean towel and held it on the wound. “Miss Yost and I will fix you right up.”

Dorothy entered the room. “I apologize. He ran right past me before I could catch him.”

Matt waved a dismissive hand. “Micah can be a handful. I understand. Will his mother join us?”

Dorothy rolled her eyes. “No, she prefers to stay with me.”

Mrs. Shepler had not joined her son on any of their visits. She had not touched her son or spoken a kind word to him. Why? He shrugged his shoulders. “No problem.”

After Dorothy shut the door, Becca held the cloth in place. “Let me help you climb onto the exam table, Micah. How old are you?”

He held up four fingers and his thumb.

“Five?”

“Yep, I am. Is the red spot on your hand a birf-mark?”

“Yes, it is.”

He lifted his pant leg and showed a birthmark the size of a coin. “I like yours better than mine. Last time I came here, Dr. Matt told me God gives special people birfmarks. He calls them angel kisses.”

She often hid her hand in the folds of her skirt when she didn't need to use it. She was beautiful to him with or without the birthmark. Micah had delivered his message to her in the right way.

“Dr. Matt's a wise man.” She winked at Matt then patted Micah's back. “Your birthmark's a beauty, and you're definitely special.”

Matt grinned at her then leaned toward the child. “Becca is going to wash your hands and arm. When she is finished, I will have a look at your cut.”

Becca gently removed Micah's shirt. She readied soap and water then washed Micah's hands and injured arm.

Matt strolled to the medicine cabinet and removed two syringes. He filled one with numbing medicine and the other one with an antibiotic. He hid them behind his back, walked across the room, and leaned close to Becca's ear. “I suspect his cut will need stitches.”

The small boy whirled around and flung himself into Becca's arms. “No, no. Not stitches!”

“Dr. Matt will give you medicine to make it not hurt.”

“If it hurts, let me know. I will stop and administer more numbing medicine.”

Micah clutched Becca's arm with his good hand. “Please, don't let go.”

“I'm not going anywhere, and it'll all be over before you know it.”

Matt removed the cloth and administered the shot.

Micah closed his eyes tight and whimpered.

He waited a few minutes and then stitched Micah's arm. All the while stifling his chuckle as the child talked nonstop to Becca about his wooden train set. “All right, brave boy. I am finished. You may join Dorothy and your mother in the other room.”

Following them to Dorothy's desk, he liked how Becca had handled Micah. She had gained the little boy's trust. Her patience and way with the child had made treating him much easier.

Dorothy handed Micah a piece of candy. “How is your arm?”

“Dr. Matt and Becca made it all better.”

The child's mother, Leah Shepler, squinted at Becca and did not bother to address her. Matt crossed his arms against his chest. “Do you have any questions, Mrs. Shepler?”

Her reticule slid off her wrist. She caught it, removed a silver coin from inside, and pressed it in Dorothy's palm. She stood straight and tall, her dark, black ringlets bouncing, as she jutted her chin. “No, I do not, and Micah and I must be on our way.”

The child hugged Becca before skipping to his mother. Mrs. Shepler did not glance back as she shut the door.

Matt waited for Becca to comment about Mrs. Shepler's rude behavior, but she did not. She had not spoken a negative word about anyone since she began working for him. “Micah does not take easily to everyone, but he warmed to you right away.”

Her cheeks flushed pink. “He's a dear little boy, and I love children.”

Matt smoothed back his hair. “He wore me out. Maybe we will have a few minutes to catch our breath before the next patient comes in.”

The door swung open. Mr. Waxman limped in with a gaping leg wound.

Matt whispered in Becca's ear. “I could have used a
few
more minutes before our next patient.”

Becca chuckled and joined him in supporting Mr. Waxman to the exam room. Blood flowed from Mr. Waxman's open cut on his lower leg.

“How did you hurt yourself?” Matt held his breath a moment to avoid gagging. He supported the man to the exam table. Mr. Waxman reeked of alcohol and body odor. He must have started drinking early in the day and neglected bathing for quite some time.

“I fell off my horse.”

Matt assessed the wound and told Becca what he needed to treat the injury.

Becca did not flinch or grimace. She stayed right by his side and comforted Mr. Waxman when he cried out in pain.

She squeezed Mr. Waxman's shoulder. “Hold on. It won't take much longer.”

Matt finished suturing Mr. Waxman's leg and applied a bandage to the wound. He passed the man pills to take to ward off infection. He escorted Mr. Waxman to the door and another patient came in. He and Becca skipped dinner.

The clock struck five. Matt sighed and turned his window sign to CLOSED, then removed his stethoscope and hung it on a peg.

Becca yawned and removed her reticule from a drawer. She moved to the door. “We had a long day. Go home and get some rest.”

He bid her farewell and shut the door. Then he gathered his belongings and headed for the livery.

On his ride home, he noticed a wagon in front of Ruth's house with an older Amish couple and young woman inside. He steered his horse a little closer and squinted. Becca and Ruth walked toward them. His heart sank. The couple must be her parents. Who was the woman with them? Would she go home with them? He was fond of Becca. He should have told her this. Would he ever have another opportunity to talk to her?

 

 

Becca held Ruth's hand tight as they walked outside to greet their parents and Grace. Not going home before today had been the right decision. It had forced her parents to face Ruth after three long years, but would this make things better between them or worse?

Joseph and Elizabeth Yost stepped out of the buggy.

Her mamm appeared older than her daed, even though they were both forty. She liked Mamm's plump soft body and smooth, flawless skin. She had full rosy cheeks and big blue eyes. Wrinkles had deepened on Mamm's forehead and chin. Was it from the worry she had caused her mamm? She hoped not.

Ruth ran to hug them. Becca's eyes filled with tears as she hugged Grace and watched her parents and sister hold each other and cry. She had prayed often for her parents to reunite with her sister. She hoped they would be delighted Ruth's devotion to God hadn't wavered and realize she was the same sweet daughter they raised.

Grace whispered in her ear. “I've missed you, dear friend.”

“I'm glad you came. I have something important to tell you and my parents.”

Ruth stepped back and kissed Grace's cheek. She motioned to her parents and Grace. “Please, come inside.”

Becca hugged her daed. She loved wrapping her arms around his thin frame and having his long arms around her. She inhaled the scent of tobacco in his shirt then peered into his dark brown eyes. “What a nice surprise to find you and Mamm outside Ruth's door.”

She stepped to Mamm and circled her arms around her overweight soft body. She separated from her and pushed a stray golden hair back in her mamm's kapp. “I'm happy you're here.” She searched her mamm's sad blue eyes and shut her mouth.

Mamm and Daed stepped inside the house and sat in chairs. They hadn't spoken to either her or Ruth. Were they angry, sad, or overwhelmed with emotion? Why wouldn't her parents say something?

Daed removed his hat. “Becca, David's parents told us he plans to visit and ask you to marry him again. We came to warn you and to ask you to kumme home with us.”

“David already came to ask me to marry him, and I told him no.” She recounted her awkward and disappointing conversation with David.

Daed raised his eyebrows. “Would you like me to tell him to leave you alone?”

She shook her head. “No, it isn't necessary. He got my message loud and clear.”

Mamm put her hand on Becca's shoulder. “You've been in Massillon long enough. It's time for you to kumme home. Our friends and relatives have put the unpleasant marriage ceremony behind them.”

Grace bobbed her head up and down. She straightened her kapp over her brown hair wound in a bun.

Becca gripped her apron. “David isn't keeping me from coming home.” She cleared her throat. “I've been working as a nurse for Dr. Carrington. His office is in town, close to Ruth's Mending Shop. I've learned about medications and how to help him treat patients with a variety of illnesses and injuries. I enjoy nursing more than I did being a midwife.” She paused to give herself time to gather the courage to continue. “I've worshipped in Ruth's church, and she and I have enjoyed being together. I can't imagine not spending time with her. I'm happy here. I'm going to stay in Massillon and live with Ruth.” She had talked too fast. She shouldn't have blurted her news out all at once. This was a lot of information for her parents and Grace to take in.

Mamm brought her hand to her chest. “No, Becca. Please don't do this to us.”

Daed bowed his head and clasped his hands. He shook his head. “You will be shunned by your friends in Berlin. It's a sin for you to leave your Amish life behind.”

Grace wiped a tear from her heart-shaped face and clasped her friend's hand.

Mamm studied Ruth. “You can open a mending shop for the Amish community in Berlin. I'll help you. Please, kumme home. We miss you. Our lives haven't been the same since you left. Becca can continue to work for Hester. We can be a family again.”

Ruth gently squeezed Mamm's fingers. “Please try and understand. I have my home, church, and friends here. It took time to make my business a success. I have customers who visit my shop on a regular basis. They like my work and trust me. I appreciate my Amish upbringing, but to live by Amish rules is not for me.” She reached for her Bible. “I have not abandoned my faith in God. I pray and read my Bible every day. In that respect, I am the same daughter you have always known.”

Becca chimed in. “In spite of wanting to live in Massillon, my faith and devotion to God hasn't wavered and won't in the future either.”

Daed straightened. “I don't believe you can be devoted to God, living in the outside world.” He held up his hands. “I understand you don't agree with me. Let's not argue about it.” He pursed his lips. “On another note, Becca, I don't like you working for an Englischer.”

“Matt Carrington's a fine doctor, and he has taught me a lot about nursing. He's faithful to God and a gentleman. You would like him.”

Mamm scooted her chair closer to Becca. “You called him Matt. Do you have feelings for this mann? Is he another reason you wish to stay in Massillon?”

Becca swallowed around the lump in her throat. What if Matt asked to court her? She would say yes. She had to tell them she cared for him. Matt was a popular doctor in town. She wouldn't want anyone else to tell them, and their friends and neighbors from Berlin visited Massillon on occasion to buy special supplies. She and Matt had attended church, he had come to Ruth's for dinner, and they had been to restaurants together. Even though Ruth was with them on these occasions, Mamm and Daed wouldn't approve. She must tell them the truth. “Yes. He and I are friends at this point. He hasn't asked to court me. I would like him to.” She paused and waited for one of them to respond to her news.

Mamm squinted at Ruth. “Did you have anything to do with Becca meeting Dr. Carrington? Have you influenced her to remain here?”

Before Ruth could answer, Becca raised her hand. “I met Dr. Carrington on my first day here. I suffered a minor injury on my way to Ruth's house. He bandaged it for me and led me here. Later, she suggested I work for him, but she's not to blame for my being fond of him. I am. Ruth trusts him. Matt and Caleb were good friends. He has an excellent reputation in town.”

Daed leaned forward. “If he doesn't ask to court you soon, will you kumme home?”

Becca left her chair and knelt before him. She covered his hands with hers. “No, I want to make a life for myself here with or without Matt. I love you and Mamm with all my heart, but I can't live my life for you.”

Ruth knelt beside Becca. “I will take excellent care of her, and all of you are always welcome in our house. We would love it if you would visit regularly.”

Mamm stood. “We're disappointed you both have chosen to leave the Amish order. Your daed and I are bound by Amish law to shun you, but I don't want to separate myself from my dochders anymore.” Her lip quivered as she addressed Daed. “I've been miserable not being able to visit Ruth. I can't stand the thought of not visiting our dochders again. They can't kumme home again, but may we write to them? Maybe visit them once in a while? They're determined to live here. Nothing we say will change their minds. We must accept they're not kumming home.”