Change of Life (48 page)

We all went to our respective homes after the appointment was over. We all needed time to reflect on what had just happened. I texted Tom with the result and asked him to let the children know. He texted back that he was pleased at the news and that we’d talk about it more when we met and that, yes, he would tell the children that evening.

Michael and I spent the rest of that day alternating between spells of quiet, solitary reflection and periods of discussing how we were feeling about this newest fact about Robbie. We both felt a sort of peace as far as Heather was concerned. Not only had Robbie’s conception taken place at a time when she was clean, happy and positive about life, but he’d been conceived with someone she knew and cared about – and not with someone she’d sold herself to. I just wished I knew what it was that happened to destroy all that positivity and make her kill herself less than a year later. When I said so to Michael, he’d only say that Tom would tell me that part of the story. But whatever the whole story was, it was enough, for now, to know that Robbie had found his father – someone I knew to be a good man.

The next morning I packed for the weekend and waited impatiently for Kirsty to collect me. She arrived with Lucy and Eilidh at about eleven, and we were in St Andrews by early afternoon. All the way up in the car we talked about Robbie and Rick. Lucy, Kirsty and I couldn’t get over how Robbie was now a common link between us. Eilidh said never mind that, she was still getting over the shock that her boyfriend would soon be a sort of step-brother.

Sam was waiting for us at the hotel. She ran into my arms and we held each other tight. She exclaimed over my hair and about how well I looked, compared to the last time she saw me. She exclaimed again about Kirsty and Rick and anew about Rick and Robbie. I was reassured by all the exclaiming, the enthusiasm and the ‘oh my gods’ – this was more like the old, carefree Sam.

Once we were all checked in and had taken our stuff to our rooms, then the fun began. We went to the spa and had some serious pampering. That evening we had a lovely meal and had such a laugh together. We were all very excited about the next day.

That night, in our room, Sam and I had a long heart to heart about everything that had happened since May. I was able to thank my lovely daughter for everything she’d done to hold things together for the family. She said she’d been glad to do it and that it had been good for her. I also told her I was looking forward to seeing her father the next day. I didn’t mention Sheena and, if she knew anything on that score, she didn’t give anything away. She asked me about how I was doing physically, and said again that it was great to see me looking so well. I told her I was feeling good about my prospects for survival. And I meant it – whatever happened – I wanted to get well. It was good to be alive.

Tom

Chapter Forty Two

I was incredibly nervous on the morning of the wedding. And it wasn’t only because of my role in the ceremony. I was worried about whether the plan would work. Everyone in the wedding party was involved – everyone, except Rosie.

I suppose Kirsty was the instigator. It was just after Rosie got out of hospital and I was recovering from the gastric bug. Kirsty phoned and told me about her and Rick and how they were going to get married. I was very touched when she asked me to give her away.

“Good, that’s that sorted,” said Kirsty. “Now we just need to get you and Rosie fixed.” She hesitated for the shortest of moments. “You do know she thinks you’re in a new relationship, don’t you?”

I tried to keep my voice steady. “Michael asked me if I was seeing someone. I left him in no doubt – I’m not. I’m not interested in being with anyone else.” My breath caught and reduced my voice to a whisper. “I just want Rosie.”

“I thought so. I’m sorry, Tom. I didn’t want to upset you.”

“It’s all right – really – Kirsty. I know you’re trying to help.”

I considered asking her who Rosie supposed I was involved with, but it was way too painful a topic. I think Kirsty sensed how I felt, because she didn’t seem inclined to get into any details.

“Well, somewhere along the line, wires got crossed and you’re going to have to untangle them. Have you two arranged a time to get together?” Kirsty sounded like a teacher questioning a seven year old.

“Yes, sort of, as soon as
I’m
in the clear from this virus – but we haven’t got a firm arrangement yet.”

I heard Kirsty sigh – could imagine her shaking her head.

“Right, you need a firm arrangement, one that can’t be broken. My wedding will be the perfect opportunity. I’m going to ask Rosie to be a bridesmaid. You two will be in the same place at the same time. I know St Andrews didn’t work out last month, but I have a good feeling about it this time. And I have a plan. You’re going to surprise her, impress her, and sweep her off her feet!”

By the time it was fully formed, Kirsty’s plan involved everyone and all were sworn to secrecy. The wedding itself had not required so much planning.

There was the home part of the plan. Dan knew that if things went well between me and Rosie, then Max would be staying with Ruby for the entire week after the wedding. Dan would drop Max off at Ruby’s, if and when he got the call. Ma was similarly on standby for a week with Toby. Jenny and Adam were prepared for the possibility of me being away for longer than just the weekend. Even Sheena and Andy played a part in the plan, and both had done as much as they could to prepare me.

And then there was the away part of the plan. Lucy and Graham were instructed to make
themselves
scarce after the wedding ceremony as were Sam, Eilidh and Robbie. I also needed to leave immediately after the ceremony. Rick was primed to give me an excuse to do so. That way, when Rick needed a favour, only Rosie would be available.

The cottage, a crucial part of the plan, was booked by Rick. It was a holiday place, belonging to a mate of his, and was just outside St Andrews. As far as Rosie was concerned, the cottage was to be the venue for Rick and Kirsty’s wedding night.

So, by the day of the wedding I was tense with anticipation. I was alone in the house on that morning. Even Toby was gone, picked up by Ma the day before. I packed the cool-boxes with the food shopping I’d done the previous evening, and put the last minute bits of packing into my holdall. I checked and rechecked that I’d put everything into the car. Then, at last, it was time to set off.

Before picking up Robbie, I went to the flat. There I collected the extra bag that Michael had secretly packed for Rosie. It contained clothes that Rosie didn’t know she might need.

Once on the road, I just wanted to concentrate on getting to Fife, and on putting the plan into action. Robbie talked a bit about Rick and how he was getting his head round having found his real father. But he seemed to sense that I wasn’t up to much in the way of conversation. He asked if I minded if he listened to his i-pod while we drove. I said I didn’t mind at all.

We went to the cottage before making our way into St Andrews. I followed the directions Rick had given me. It was down a single track road and surrounded by fields. It was an old, traditional structure, with whitewashed walls. The key was where Rick said it would be, on a shelf in the shed behind the cottage. The shed also contained plenty of logs for the fire.

We let ourselves in. There was a welcome note to me and Rosie propped up on the kitchen table. I pocketed the note.

The kitchen seemed well equipped, which was a relief. I put the food I’d brought into the fridge and larder. I also put the pink champagne in to chill. I hoped it was still Rosie’s favourite.

I’d also got flowers for Rosie and Robbie helped me carry them in. There were several armfuls – roses and freesias. The florist in Gullane was both bemused and delighted as I selected almost her entire stock of both types of flower. Suspecting, I’m sure, that flower arranging was not a skill set that I possessed, she’d offered to arrange them and tie them into bunches - an offer I was pleased to accept. So all Robbie and I had to do was
find
some vases and get them in water.

“Only two vases – that’s no use!” I said, after we’d scouted around.

Robbie laughed. “Nobody would be expecting this amount of flowers – two vases are probably more than enough for normal people. You have gone a bit over the top.”

“Yes, I probably have overdone it, haven’t I?”

“Don’t worry,” Robbie said, smiling broadly. “Rosie will love it!”

“God, I hope so,” I replied.

In the end we had to use two pails, a waste paper bin, a milk jug and a beer tankard as makeshift vases.

Robbie went back to the car to phone Eilidh and I was able to have a quick look round the cottage as I put flowers into every room.

The living room had a huge, brown, leather sofa and three matching armchairs. A log fire was set in the grate, ready to light.

The master bedroom at the back looked out over open fields. I allowed myself only a quick glance at the large, white-covered bed.

As well as a shower room, there was a bathroom with an enormous free-standing bath at its centre – the sort that Rosie had often said she’d love to have at home.

The ceilings were low, and I had to watch not to bump my head on some of the doorways, but the overall effect was cosy and comfortable. The place had a good atmosphere. I started to hope.

Graham and Rick arrived at the hotel moments after Robbie and I got there. We all met up in the foyer. Graham called Lucy to say we’d arrived and she came to greet us. She said the girls were having lunch in Rosie and Sam’s room. She told us who was to get ready in which room and that I was to be at Kirsty’s room at five-to-three.

Before Lucy left us to go back upstairs, she gave me a kiss on the cheek and wished me luck. Rick protested that it was him who was getting married and did he not get a good luck kiss. Graham said never mind that, he was Lucy’s husband and he didn’t even get a kiss. She just made a face, laughed and walked off.

Me
and the other guys went to the bar for some lunch before going to get changed. And then it was time.

Kirsty opened the door to her room as soon as I knocked. She looked lovely in a long, cream dress, with a little jacket thing over the top of it. She was carrying a bunch of yellow roses.

“Wow,” I said, “you scrub up nice.”

She laughed. “Why thank you. You don’t look so bad yourself. Rosie won’t be able to resist.”

I smiled weakly. “Ready?”

“Yes – very,” she replied taking my arm. I don’t know about Kirsty, but I was feeling quite sick with nerves.

As I approached the wedding room with Kirsty on my arm, I spotted Eilidh, Lucy and Rosie waiting just outside. When we got over to where they were standing, all three of them said how lovely Kirsty looked.

Rosie glanced at me at the same moment I looked at her. She smiled. She looked incredible - relaxed, happy and beautiful.

As a heart surgeon I should have known better, but it felt like my heart was going to explode out of my chest. I could hardly breathe.

Then we were being ushered inside the room and the processional music started. I took Kirsty’s arm once more and walked her down to where Rick was standing with Graham. Lucy, Eilidh and Rosie followed us. Sam and Robbie stood up as we came in. They grinned at me. I think Sam actually winked. I couldn’t have felt more nervous if it had been me getting married. My normally very steady hands were shaking and I thought my legs might give way. I was glad to be able to hang on to Kirsty. She seemed to be steadying me rather than the other way around, and she squeezed my arm as we walked. The music faded and the registrar smiled. I kissed Kirsty and passed her hand into Rick’s outstretched one. Then I gratefully sat down beside Sam and Robbie.

As Rick and Kirsty exchanged their vows, I watched Rosie. She was standing beside Kirsty, looking intently from her to Rick. She looked gorgeous in a shade of blue that suited her perfectly. She wore a circle of yellow flowers in her new, short hair. I looked again, yes, she definitely had hair.

Sam was right when she’d said how well Rosie was looking. She caught me gazing at her mother, squeezed my hand and smiled.