Charmed & Ready (14 page)

And I'm friggin' trying this time. I really am. I wish I could just say, "Fuck it," but I can't. I hurt for him and I know something's not right. Stupid asshole.

Sunday, 9 A. M.

Confused witches: 1

At one this morning Sam slipped into my bed. Scared the crap out of me at first. I didn't even hear him come in. No one could get past my protection wards but friends and family, but it did shock me to suddenly feel someone on the other side of the bed.

I cracked an eye and saw him lying on his side staring at me.

"Hey," I whispered.

"Hey." He reached out and pushed the hair off of my face. "I'm sorry about before."

Pulling me to him, he rubbed my back.

I took a deep breath and inhaled him. Sandalwood and patchouli, he never disappoints. "It's okay."

"No, it's not. I just needed some more time. I thought I could push it aside but I couldn't. I don't think I'm as over things as I thought." The last was said on a whisper.

I pulled away. "What are you talking about?"

"My ex, she was at the hospital with her husband." He took my hand and rubbed my fingers. "We all pretended like there was nothing awkward about it. They were in town for a friend's engagement party, and stopped by the hospital to see some of his former colleagues. I told them to have a nice visit and went on to my patient." He sat up and leaned against the headboard, but he didn't let go of my hand.

"Did seeing her trigger all of the old memories? Do you still have feelings for her?" Sam came with some baggage. He'd found his ex-fiancée in bed with two of his best friends the night before they were supposed to get married. Well, they were former best friends now. His trust issues had a strong foundation in doubt. I've known it from the beginning and, since I share a lot of the same kind of trust issues, I figure we're perfect for one another.

"God, no." He snorted. "I can barely stand being in the room with her. She makes my skin crawl."

"Then what happened to put you in such an awful mood?"

He kissed my fingertips. "I am really sorry for taking it out on you."

"And I told you it's okay, but tell me why."

"Well, a couple of hours later I was coming out of the patient's hospital room, and she stood there waiting for me. She said she wanted to talk to me and it would only take a few minutes." He frowned.

I nodded, encouraging him on.

"I didn't want to talk to her. Honestly, it makes me ill to be near her now. But I took her to a friend's office. He wasn't there and it was private. That's when—crap. It makes me sick to say it." Sam paused.

In that moment my heart sank to my toes. If he did anything with her, I'm not at all sure I could be a grown-up about it. Really. I could feel
my
temper rising. I shoved everything back down.

He stared ahead in the dark. The light from the moon outside highlighted his profile. "She told me she was pregnant."

My heart went from my toes to my throat. No, no, the timing was wrong. He hadn't seen her in more than six months. She'd sent him an invitation to her wedding, but a warlock had almost killed him, so he had a good excuse for not going.

"She said she wished the baby was mine. That she was sorry for what she did and that she still loved me." He turned to me. "What kind of woman is pregnant with another man's child and says something like that?"

A fucked-up one. I didn't say anything, but if I ever met this woman she would walk away with an ass four times her normal size and a couple of warts on her nose. I kissed his fingers like he did mine.

"I wanted to hit her, Bron. I've never wanted to hit a woman. Ever. Especially, a pregnant woman. But she made me sick. Her words made me physically ill."

Me too.

"So what did you say?" I moved closer and put my head on his chest, wrapping my arms around his waist. He needed comfort.

"I told her she was sick and that she needed to find a good psychiatrist." He laughed. "She looked like I had hit her. I said if she ever came near me again, I'd tell her husband everything.

"It isn't right, or fair, but on the way home, all those thoughts about you and that Zane guy came up. When I walked in and saw you, I kept thinking,
Will she do the same thing? Can I trust anyone
? Just a few months ago you couldn't decide between Azir and me. Is what we have real?

"I was driving myself crazy at home and then I realized something. I love you so much. If there's any chance of making this thing work, I've got to let the past go."

I squeezed him tighter. "I love you too. Only you. I don't blame you for being upset about Zane, but rest assured I have absolutely no feelings for him other than as a client. He's charming and a good friend. That's it."

Sam kissed me hard. "God, Bron. I can't stand the idea of losing you."

"You aren't going to lose me. I'm in for the long haul." I kissed him back.

We ended up making love. It was tender, maybe not as passionate as the last time, but good. The thing is, I noticed that when our auras mixed this time, something was off. When we climax there's usually a golden haze, but this was almost amber. Kind of orangey. It wouldn't be a big deal, except for what happened at about five this morning.

Sam's cell phone rang. I turned over, figuring it was the hospital or nursing home calling him in. That's a doctor's life.

But the conversation was weird.

"Yes," Sam answered. "What time? I've got to run and get my things and I'll be there." Then he hung up.

He reached over and kissed me. "I've got to go out of the country for a few days. I'll call when I get back." Then he went to the bathroom before I could say anything.

I sat up and grabbed his phone. Pushing the buttons I found the number of whoever had called him. I didn't recognize it. I heard him coming out and put the phone back on the nightstand.

Reaching for him, I grabbed his hand. "Did you say out of the country? Where?"

He kissed me again, this time on the forehead. "Sorry, babe. Can't tell you. You're not the only one who has secrets about the job." Pulling on his pants, he had the nerve to smile like it was some kind of joke.

"Wait a minute, why would you have to leave the country for your job?" It was a valid question. He's a small town doctor. It didn't make sense.

He shook his head. "I mean it, I can't say. If I can, I'll tell you when I get back. I may be out of touch for a while. I don't know what kind of reach I'll get with my cell phone." He hugged me. "I love you."

Then the big jerk just walked out. Maybe it was the early hour, but I didn't take it well.

When the door slammed downstairs I heard him turn the key. He'd gone.

I let my frustration out in a primal scream that shook the house. For real. The ground moved. I sat in the middle of the bed on my knees and looked around. Two pictures had fallen off the wall and several knickknacks on the dresser had toppled.

What was that?

I tried to see if I could do it again, but nothing happened. Then I thought about how angry I was with Sam. The stupid jerk. We'd just made up. He couldn't run off to another country without any kind of explanation. That was my MO.

I pounded the bed with my fist and the house shook again. Now, it could have been an earthquake, but since we live on zero fault lines, I found that hard to accept.

Turns out I have a new power. I can shake the earth.

I waited an hour and called Garnout. Excited about the new power, and still kind of pissed at Sam, I told the wizard what happened with the earthquake.

"There you have it. More." He laughed.

"So, you knew I was about to get a new power?"

"Yes, but I didn't know how it would manifest or when."

I moved down to the kitchen and made a pot of orange and cinnamon tea. "Not that I'm not grateful, but what good is something like this?"

He laughed hard this time. "Why, to keep your enemies off balance, my dear. Learn to focus on that power and you'll soon discover it comes in quite handy."

Other than informing me that I needed to meditate more and learn to sustain the energy, he didn't have much else to say.

So I'm going to try yoga again, and then some meditation. And I'm not going to think about Sam and his quick exit this morning because that makes me very angry. Damn, just shook the teacup off the counter. What a mess.

Monday, 2 P. M.

Sweet, Texas

Spells: 1

Snoopy witches: 1

When your troubles weigh heavy, ask a friend about hers. It always makes you feel better. It's sad, but true.

Poor Kira, she's in a tizzy. The dead people won't leave her alone. I had to get out of the house and away from my own thoughts.

Sam left a message while I was in the shower. "Sorry again about the rush this morning. But it's all good, we'll talk when I get home." I promised him months ago to never pry into his mind or try and locate him. But well, I just did a quick flash and saw he was on a jet. It looked like a private one.

He does a lot of work with his father, who is a big humanitarian, so I wondered if that had something to do with it.

Like I said, had to get out of the house and away from my own head.

Stopped by the library and, it being a Monday, no one was there. It was one of her slowest days of the week, but Kira seemed a bit more flustered than normal.

Dressed in a black Armani pinstriped suit, four-inch Pradas and her long blond curls hanging loose around her shoulders, she couldn't have looked less like a small town librarian. She'd made a small fortune during her tenure as a corporate lawyer, and spent a good portion of it on her clothes. You can take the girl out of the big city, but not necessarily away from her favorite designers.

"So, bad day?"

She shoved her curls behind her ears. "I've had it up to here with these damn ghosts." She put her hand to the top of her forehead.

"What happened?" I picked up a book and handed it to her to stack on the shelf in front her.

"They want me to help them. Now I don't just see them, I hear them. And—"

She rolled her eyes. "The worst was this morning. Mrs. Archer, the one who owns that big ranch out south, came in to return some books. There was this old man who walked up to the desk right before and was asking if we had anything on World War II. I told him to check the back wall far right corner where we keep most of the historical novels. Mrs. Archer looked at me like I had three heads."

Kira stepped over to another shelf and pulled the book cart with her. Normally she treats books like small treasures, but she was slamming them into the shelves.

"I asked her if I could help her, and she kept staring. 'Excuse me, Mrs. Archer can I help you?' I said it again. She handed me her books and then she said, 'Who were you talking to before?' 'I don't know his name,' I told her. She patted my hand. 'Dear, are you feeling well? There wasn't anyone there. You were talking to thin air."

"I almost passed out right then and there. I'd been conversing with a ghost. When I looked at the corner where I'd sent him, no one was there. I said something stupid like I must have been daydreaming. I'm sure now the whole town knows the librarian's off her rocker. But he seemed so real, Bron."

I handed her another book. "Don't beat yourself up, girl. This is all new to you, but you'll learn how to tell the dead from the living. I know. How about I teach you to see auras? Dead people don't have auras, so that way you can tell."

She turned to face me. "Do you think I could learn to do that?"

"Sure. Trust me, it's a lot harder to see dead people than it is auras. Since you can already read different energies, it'll probably be even easier. Why don't you come to the house tonight? Have you told Caleb yet?"

She frowned. "No, the right time hasn't come up. Though I'm sure he thinks something is up because he heard me talking to myself in the bathroom the other morning." She made a face. "Well, I was talking to the dead people. But he's back in New York this week working on that story, so I'm free. Do you think I can do this?"

I laughed. "Yes, you can. And I wish you wouldn't worry so much about telling Caleb. He's a big toad, but he loves you and he hangs with me, so he understands the metaphysical world better than most men do."

She smiled and held one of the books to her chest. "Yes, he'll probably be great about it. But I think I have to accept it first."

I made a few more stops, one of which included peeking into Janet and Mike's new bookstore. They were set to open in a few weeks, and it was looking good. Cherry wood bookcases lined the walls. There were short aisles of shelves and some tables for displays. They hadn't revealed the name yet. The sign over the door was wrapped in brown paper. I didn't see either of them, so I decided to head out and check on the jet.

Caleb had flown her home from New York for me, but I always like to check her out before and after flights. It'd probably be another few days before I should fly. But I could hardly wait. I love to fly. It's one of the few times in my life I can let go of everything except concentrating on the task.